Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Warning

by David M Willis on August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Just Hangin' Out With My Family
└ Tags: amber, blaine, dina, faz

Discussion (441) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    NOT PREPARED D=

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      Actually, I’m wondering why Dina let two strange men in their room… I know in our dorms, we would’ve had to sign them in, and like hell I would’ve done that for someone *claiming* to be my roomie’s family.

      • Squall
        Squall
        August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        They look kinda evil, so it’s too bad Dina can’t read faces.

      • Endest
        Endest
        August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        Why should dina not let them in? She’s Dina. Dina~!

        • Broooooooo Nope.
          Broooooooo Nope.
          August 12, 2013 at 4:52 pm | #

          NUNUNUNUNUNUNUNUNU DINA!

        • Broooooooo Nope.
          Broooooooo Nope.
          August 12, 2013 at 4:52 pm | #

          Batman theme? .-.

          • Endest
            Endest
            August 12, 2013 at 10:39 pm | #

            ……why are there two of you?

            • Endest
              Endest
              August 13, 2013 at 12:31 pm | #

              Yeah, that’s just confusing.

              • Endest
                Endest
                August 14, 2013 at 2:36 am | #

                Srsly man?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

        Duh, the door was already opened. How else could Dina stand behind it? It’s the only place she’s comfortable.

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          August 12, 2013 at 9:18 pm | #

          Dina, Dina, Dina… there’s a BATHROOM door, too =<

      • halcyon1234
        halcyon1234
        August 12, 2013 at 6:07 pm | #

        I’m sure she asked for ID and a cheek swab, and ran a paternity test. Dina may be many things, but she is thorough.

        • Shadow12000
          Shadow12000
          August 19, 2013 at 10:45 pm | #

          *insert joke about them being fossils here*

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      DUN DUN DUNNNNNN!
      *cuesDramatic Gopher gif

  2. JebJeb
    JebJeb
    August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Oh god. This can only get worse now.

    • Passerby
      Passerby
      August 12, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      You misspelled better.

      • GrrArg42
        GrrArg42
        August 12, 2013 at 4:00 am | #

        No… he spelled it correctly.
        I am afraid… very afraid.
        Seriously though, I’m really scared. 🙁

        • GrrArg42
          GrrArg42
          August 12, 2013 at 4:18 am | #

          I just had a thought…
          Faz and Dina as a couple…
          Now I’m terrified.

          • Yarrr
            Yarrr
            August 12, 2013 at 7:10 am | #

            Yeah isn’t this borderline dark territory for this comic?

            • Drunken Nordmann
              Drunken Nordmann
              August 12, 2013 at 9:04 am | #

              And now I’m imaging how their offspring would be – creepily grinning Dinjas?

            • Mal
              Mal
              August 12, 2013 at 11:32 am | #

              It’s really no darker than roofies at a party.

              • Jack Finch
                Jack Finch
                August 13, 2013 at 7:18 am | #

                Exactly.

          • Dibullba
            Dibullba
            August 12, 2013 at 9:12 am | #

            You will take responsibility for the expenses on the pool of brain bleach I had to swim in….

          • Me
            Me
            August 12, 2013 at 9:46 pm | #

            Could be, I mean, Faz LIKED Amber ’cause she was shorter tan him… and Dina look shorter than him (and Amber look taller…)

      • PetrePan
        PetrePan
        August 16, 2013 at 5:04 pm | #

        Yeah, I was super-happy about this.

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      August 12, 2013 at 1:04 am | #

      Don’t lose hope. Maybe they aren’t as bad as they seem… maybe…

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        August 12, 2013 at 1:16 am | #

        Nope. The next few comics are just gonna be pure suck fer poor Amber…

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 3:23 am | #

          The return of Shitnado! Ruth and her baby was only the eye of the storm!

  3. Anna1090
    Anna1090
    August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Am I the only one who thinks Faz is strangely adorable?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

      Yes and that is a scary thing to think.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

        As long as the great Faz keeps his “character” to himself, yes, he is adorable. And I hated the little twerp.

    • Trae Dorn
      Trae Dorn
      August 12, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      The great Faz is pleased to hear this, and would like to show you a fifteen minute presentation (including several sozable charts) explaining why you should copulate with him.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        By this chart you can see that Faz’s cuteness stems from his large genitalia.

        • Mr. Random
          Mr. Random
          August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

          His large genitalia stem from his pulsing muscles which he hides so other men do not feel emasculated. Faz does this out of the mercy of Faz’s heart. Faz is manly and kind.

    • Marek
      Marek
      August 12, 2013 at 3:24 am | #

      Faz is always strangely adorable. Then he opens his mouth.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      August 12, 2013 at 8:23 am | #

      The operative word here is STRANGELY!

    • Gamma Ray
      Gamma Ray
      August 12, 2013 at 9:06 am | #

      I think part of his adorable-ness here is the way he’s standing next to Blaine, who towers over him, in a mimicked posture. It’s a little bit d’aww.

      At least until he says something that makes your skin crawl, then it’s back to normal for The Great Faz.

  4. CleverTrousers
    CleverTrousers
    August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Woah.

    • Chad from Canada
      Chad from Canada
      August 12, 2013 at 1:38 am | #

      Thanks, Keanu.

      • Jesse
        Jesse
        August 12, 2013 at 2:52 am | #

        Don’t be rude to him. He knows Kung Fu.

  5. Thor
    Thor
    August 12, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

    • laila
      laila
      August 12, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      You read my mind.

    • Squall
      Squall
      August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

          CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

          • Mr. Random
            Mr. Random
            August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

            DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

            • Squall
              Squall
              August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

              EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

              • Reltzik
                Reltzik
                August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

                FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFACE

              • StClair
                StClair
                August 12, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

                (yay, I get the best letter of all for this situation!)

                FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  August 12, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

                  HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

                  GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

                • Aizat
                  Aizat
                  August 12, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

                  KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 1:38 am | #

                  So apparently we don’t know the alphabet.

                • Thor
                  Thor
                  August 12, 2013 at 1:58 am | #

                  ΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩΩ

                • Undrave
                  Undrave
                  August 12, 2013 at 3:13 am | #

                  ÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇ

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 3:25 am | #

                  ŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁŁ

                • Skruff
                  Skruff
                  August 12, 2013 at 6:33 am | #

                  22222222222222222222222222222!!!

                • TARDIS With A Hat
                  TARDIS With A Hat
                  August 12, 2013 at 6:35 am | #

                  אאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאאא

                • GoldStarz
                  GoldStarz
                  August 12, 2013 at 8:17 am | #

                  PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13PG-13

                • vsophi
                  vsophi
                  August 12, 2013 at 9:05 am | #

                  あああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああ

                • carl320
                  carl320
                  August 12, 2013 at 9:37 am | #

                  iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

                • The Candyman
                  The Candyman
                  August 12, 2013 at 10:25 am | #

                  Ως γήινη Θιβέτ γιλέκο δυο ξωκλήσι.

                • Don
                  Don
                  August 12, 2013 at 10:44 am | #

                  “As earthly Tibet, jacket two chapel”?

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 10:44 am | #

                  ونحن لا نعرف الأبجدية

                • The Candyman
                  The Candyman
                  August 12, 2013 at 10:52 am | #

                  I don’t speak Greek.

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 12:17 pm | #

                  Squall dw i. Dw i’n byw yn America.

                • Jen Aside
                  Jen Aside
                  August 12, 2013 at 9:19 pm | #

                  ♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣

          • Squall
            Squall
            August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

            DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

            • saltchocolate
              saltchocolate
              August 12, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

              Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

              • Aizat
                Aizat
                August 12, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

                FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 1:38 am | #

                  GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

                • Mr. Random
                  Mr. Random
                  August 12, 2013 at 4:02 pm | #

                  HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 6:03 pm | #

                  IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

          CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

    • Somebody
      Somebody
      August 12, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

      Finland!

  6. CollyWolly
    CollyWolly
    August 12, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    OHHH MY GOOOOD

    • Nakari
      Nakari
      August 12, 2013 at 1:54 am | #

      Faz is going to eat her.. Then he’s going to eat you!

      • Sammy
        Sammy
        August 12, 2013 at 3:06 pm | #

        I highly appreciate this reference

  7. NeutroBlaster
    NeutroBlaster
    August 12, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Finally! The Great Faz makes an appearance in Dumbing of Age!

    • Gram91
      Gram91
      August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      Wonder when we get to see Zaph and Rose.

      • Brian Lynch
        Brian Lynch
        August 12, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

        Or Wen.

        • Tom Speelman
          Tom Speelman
          August 12, 2013 at 1:00 am | #

          Wen will probably turn out to be Amber and Dina’s suitemate. They will leave to get it on while Amber’s Dad acts his typical butthole self.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:45 am | #

        I wanted to see Thad Guy.

  8. Squall
    Squall
    August 12, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    God almighty! Why?!

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      August 12, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

      There is no god, there is only the Great Faz. Your misery amuses and arouses him.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

        Well, there is a God. It’s just that He prefer testing his followers with strife and hardship to see if you ever stray from the path. But be patient, Squall, there is always a silver lining at the end of each dark cloud.

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 1:43 am | #

          http://youtu.be/8xkZdmg6qt4

        • The Candyman
          The Candyman
          August 12, 2013 at 10:27 am | #

          Αlso, he wants you to bring back Enterprise.

  9. Sir Robin
    Sir Robin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Oh MY GOD!!!

  10. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    I know how to handle this, quick the petro and matches!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      It won’t work…Faz is deathless.

      • Gram91
        Gram91
        August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

        He was capable of surviving Mike in the other Walkyverse.

        • Mkvenner
          Mkvenner
          August 12, 2013 at 1:13 am | #

          barely.

        • Tunaro
          Tunaro
          August 12, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

          Could still get Amber’s dad, though. His funeral proved that asshole could die, at least.

          • hmrc4evr
            hmrc4evr
            August 12, 2013 at 7:10 am | #

            You will believe an asshole can die!

            • Squall
              Squall
              August 12, 2013 at 3:35 pm | #

              Did he die from excessive friction?

        • Kaci
          Kaci
          August 12, 2013 at 2:03 pm | #

          he’s the same Faz, no matter what universe it is. He just pretends otherwise to not blow our minds.

  11. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    I knew the day would come. *Tries to find my cyanide capsule*

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      This is why you should invest in a cyanide tooth.

      • Wonder Wig
        Wonder Wig
        August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

        But then I couldn’t eat rock candy.

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

          This is why you should invest in rock candy and rock candy cyanide.

      • Squall
        Squall
        August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

        This is why you should invest in a shotgun. If you have protection, then the Faz will not happen to you.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

          If Blaine had used protection, Faz wouldn’t happen to the Dumbiverse! Hey-oh

          • Doctor_Who
            Doctor_Who
            August 12, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

            He said Step-Brother, not Half-Brother, so presumably Blaine is not Faz’s biological father in this reality.

            • Dave
              Dave
              August 12, 2013 at 1:11 am | #

              1. Or neither Blaine nor Faz are aware they’re related, it could be that Blaine hooked up back with Faz’s mother and only assumed that wasn’t his kid…
              Or 2. and this is the more probable scenario, no one has ever told Faz he’s actually related to Amber and will still try to get in her pants…which is the creepier option
              …
              It’s number 2 isn’t it? DAMN IT WILLIS!

              • Squall
                Squall
                August 12, 2013 at 3:26 am | #

                http://squallloir.tumblr.com/post/58041688107

              • ArkhamTexan
                ArkhamTexan
                August 12, 2013 at 10:52 am | #

                I’m thinking #2. I think Willis said somewhere in the comments that genetics wouldn’t really be changed in this universe or something like that? So I would think Faz has half of Blaine’s genes or else I’d think he’d look very different from his Shortpacked! self.

      • Bronze Knight
        Bronze Knight
        August 12, 2013 at 2:11 am | #

        Cyanide teeth have too many possible points of failure. Flashbangs implanted behind your eyes are far more fool proof.

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        August 12, 2013 at 11:00 am | #

        Optical flashbangs are harder to disarm.

  12. Nono
    Nono
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    I think Faz, Danny and Howard need to get together and make a band so repulsing anyone who goes to one of their concerts can never have sex again.

    • The Candyman
      The Candyman
      August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      Throw in Mary and you’ve got something.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      and they named their band “BIRTH CONTROL”.

      • Pyr05
        Pyr05
        August 12, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

        Nah, they named it “The Great Faz & Those Who Wish To Be Faz”

        • ArkhamTexan
          ArkhamTexan
          August 12, 2013 at 10:57 am | #

          “Why would they come to our concert just to boo us?”

    • vsophi
      vsophi
      August 12, 2013 at 12:45 am | #

      “I think Faz, Danny and Howard need to get together”

      Before I finished the rest of that sentence, a single tear fell.

    • Tunaro
      Tunaro
      August 12, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

      But what if it gets on Youtube, and goes viral, and causes humanity to go extinct from lack of sex?! IT WILL BE THE END OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT!!!

      • Archtus
        Archtus
        August 12, 2013 at 2:27 am | #

        ~~It’s the end of the world as we know it!
        And I feel fine~~

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 3:33 am | #

          No you don’t.

          • drs
            drs
            August 12, 2013 at 10:22 am | #

            You feel Faz.
            Inside you.

            • Squall
              Squall
              August 12, 2013 at 10:46 am | #

              Pulsing

  13. Megatron
    Megatron
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Stand still Blaine. I don’t want to chance wrecking the walls with my fusion cannon.

    • Darth
      Darth
      August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      Fuck the fusion cannon! Get Lugnut up in this bongo! We need to P.O.K.E. Blaine!

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

        P.O.K.E’em? Just use Gideon’s Glue and be done with it.

        • Ancestral Hamster
          Ancestral Hamster
          August 12, 2013 at 2:53 am | #

          I say we dust off and nuke the site from orbit. Only way to be sure.

          • AsimovSideburns
            AsimovSideburns
            August 12, 2013 at 3:04 am | #

            We should give P.E.A.C.E. a chance.

            The Polite Enjoinder Against Criminal Enterprise comes with a startlingly large variety of ammunition types, and has sufficient range that you won’t have to worry about getting any of his slime on you when he explodes.

  14. SmileyOgre
    SmileyOgre
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NNOOOOOOO D8 I’M NOT EMOTIONALLY PREPARED FOR THIS SADNESS!!!

  15. Sir Robin
    Sir Robin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    My body wasn’t ready for this

  16. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    August 12, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Why? Willis, why?

    • RobHagen
      RobHagen
      August 12, 2013 at 2:44 am | #

      Three words.

      Damn You Willis!

  17. Baroncognito
    Baroncognito
    August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    I don’t see Sydney Yus anywhere.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

      I really hope she shows up now.

      • JebJeb
        JebJeb
        August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        She’s Blaine’s new mistress… Or a janitor. One of the two.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          August 12, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

          I bet She’d just complain to the kids what a horrible congresswoman Robin is.

        • hmrc4evr
          hmrc4evr
          August 12, 2013 at 7:12 am | #

          Even worse Ruth’s ex

        • Rachel
          Rachel
          August 12, 2013 at 4:19 pm | #

          Uh… A janitor ?? That’s among your first guesses?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      For extra shock value, Sydney Yus turns out to be Sierra’s sister.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        August 12, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

        What, because she’s black? Racist.

        I mean, it’s an assumption Hollywood makes all the damn time, but still.

        • The Candyman
          The Candyman
          August 12, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

          Also, Lucy is totally going to be Sierra’s sister here.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            August 12, 2013 at 1:31 am | #

            Because she’s black? Racist.

            • Squall
              Squall
              August 12, 2013 at 1:51 am | #

              Actually, you’re both wrong. Jason is the surprise secret lesbian sister of Sierra!

              • vsophi
                vsophi
                August 12, 2013 at 9:03 am | #

                Whitewashing Sierra’s family? Racist.

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 12:19 pm | #

                  Calling Jason White? YOU RACIST!!!

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 15, 2013 at 11:25 pm | #

                  So I realize that I mixed up two characters. For this I apologize. Though in my defense, Jacob and Jason are sorta the same person.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          August 12, 2013 at 2:06 am | #

          People sure do like waving that racist word around like a big floppy dick. 😀

          • Tenn
            Tenn
            August 12, 2013 at 2:57 am | #

            Big dick? Because they’re black? Racist. 😛

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              August 12, 2013 at 9:23 am | #

              That’s an unfair stereotype, not all black people have big dicks, some of them are women. 😀

              • Boom
                Boom
                August 12, 2013 at 9:41 am | #

                Futa~.

              • Squall
                Squall
                August 12, 2013 at 10:48 am | #

                You racist! Non-white women can not have dicks too!

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:04 am | #

      She’s Robin’s secret girlfriend.

  18. Tanarin
    Tanarin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    God help us all…

  19. Luzahn
    Luzahn
    August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    NOOOOOOOO!

    Faz why!

  20. The Candyman
    The Candyman
    August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Damn you, Willis. DAMN YOU TO HELL!!

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      +1

  21. Oceanus92
    Oceanus92
    August 12, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Oh, crud! Quick! Someone call for Amazi-Girl!

  22. Lightning Spiral
    Lightning Spiral
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh God, I want to be amused by how much I hate Faz. But I don’t think this storyline is going to have room for amusement.

    • Lavaticmay
      Lavaticmay
      August 12, 2013 at 9:45 am | #

      I feel Faz is going to be the Joshua for this scenario, meaning Willis will put his in for humorous effect as he did in Joyce’s angry family bout.

  23. jaredstar
    jaredstar
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    so provided blaine is anything like his walkyverse counterpart who gets the prize for jackass parent(s) him or joyces

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      Well Blaine cheated on Amber’s mom and had ties to the korean mafia.
      Joyce’s parents control her morals with the threat of jesus.

      • JustDucky
        JustDucky
        August 12, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

        He was also physically abusive to Amber, right?

        I’m actually wondering if Danny is going to redeem himself (at least somewhat) in this little story arc.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          August 12, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

          I wouldn’t hold my breath, but we can hope.

        • Ancestral Hamster
          Ancestral Hamster
          August 12, 2013 at 2:54 am | #

          Danny? Redeem himself? *ROTLMAO*

          • Squall
            Squall
            August 12, 2013 at 3:35 am | #

            He’s only worth a nickel, and most machines just spit him back out.

            • drs
              drs
              August 12, 2013 at 10:24 am | #

              Mike had your mom for a Danny?

              • The Candyman
                The Candyman
                August 12, 2013 at 10:29 am | #

                It was a ripoff.

                • Squall
                  Squall
                  August 12, 2013 at 10:49 am | #

                  It was like a crane game. You never win, so why waste nickels?

  24. piemanpie24
    piemanpie24
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh goodie, first Howard and now Faz.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      And together…They shall rule the world!

  25. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh God. This is what Willis warned us about. The family we will like less than Danny’s/Joyce’s/Ethan’s.

    It’s…it’s worse than I ever imagined. God help us all.

    • JustDucky
      JustDucky
      August 12, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Beat me to it. That’s exactly what I was wondering.

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      August 12, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

      Willis’s warning was not sufficient.

  26. JustDucky
    JustDucky
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Wait, does this mean that Amber’s dad might be the “by far worst” parent that Willis mentioned? 0.0

  27. Luzahn
    Luzahn
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Now I forget, has Dad in this universe been established as having any…relevant personality?

    • wynne
      wynne
      August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      I don’t think so, but if Faz is any indication he’s still hanging around with the Korean Mafia…. which means he’s probably just as bad as in Shortpacked.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

        and then in tomorrow’s comic, Blaine shows off his “Father of the Year” trophy.

        • Luzahn
          Luzahn
          August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

          I’m not worried. Lookit him. Look at that evil, evil face.

          • vsophi
            vsophi
            August 12, 2013 at 9:01 am | #

            Isn’t that more cause for concern?

  28. Zach
    Zach
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Does her dad look smug?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      He’s about to start his ceremonial “Villain speech”. He’s been preparing for it all year.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

        “You had evaded me for a long time, Amber. Now that I have where I want you, JOIN ME AND TOGETHER WE SHALL RULE THE GALAXY!”

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 3:37 am | #

          All that’s missing is the patent looks of ‘Dull Surprise!’ On the faces of everyone in the room.

    • Ocbrad1
      Ocbrad1
      August 12, 2013 at 9:30 am | #

      In SP, he seemed just mean. Here he seems conniving. Maybe Faz has rubbed off on him (or did I just invoke Rule 34).

  29. Jesse
    Jesse
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Step-brother? Shouldn’t that be half-brother?

    • JustDucky
      JustDucky
      August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      Not in this universe, apparently.

    • Pyr05
      Pyr05
      August 12, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

      Step brother would imply the child is not Blaine’s, but he gained a… we’ll call him “son” by remarrying.

  30. wynne
    wynne
    August 12, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh no. No no no no no no no no no no no no. Nononononononono. NO.

    And I’m not even talking about Faz.

  31. jrgolden42
    jrgolden42
    August 12, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    DinaXFaz is my OTP

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      I’ll probably draw it then.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

        DOOOOOOO EEEEEEET!

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          August 12, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

          Don’t encourage him. I really don’t need to see any erotic pictures of Faz.

          Hell, Faz probably brought his own, and is planning on showing them in subsequent strips.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            August 12, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

            I already made one with Faz and Malaya. She had a butt.

            • Portmaneau
              Portmaneau
              August 12, 2013 at 12:46 pm | #

              Gasp.

              • Squall
                Squall
                August 12, 2013 at 1:09 pm | #

                Dat gravvy~~ Chase ftw!

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        August 12, 2013 at 12:45 am | #

        http://sadpanda.us/images/1788561-NAOYNA9.png

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          August 12, 2013 at 12:56 am | #

          Even when Dina is a dinosaur, she’s adorable.

          • Squall
            Squall
            August 12, 2013 at 1:57 am | #

            You managed to make Faz totally babies. Good job!

        • timemonkey
          timemonkey
          August 12, 2013 at 11:08 am | #

          Needs more butts

        • xKiv
          xKiv
          August 12, 2013 at 8:51 pm | #

          … Dinofazus?

  32. Sir Robin
    Sir Robin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    Wait … Faz and Howard are at the same place!!!

  33. OkamiKing
    OkamiKing
    August 12, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    THIS MADE MY WEEK! LETS FAZ IT UP!

  34. Mr Soviet
    Mr Soviet
    August 12, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    Oh god, Faz caught me completely off guard. I Like where this is going!

  35. The Candyman
    The Candyman
    August 12, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    Faz still has the hots for Amber in this universe. Calling it now.

    • Tunaro
      Tunaro
      August 12, 2013 at 1:26 am | #

      Ew

  36. AgentKeen
    AgentKeen
    August 12, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    I literally had the longest comical gasp of surprise, but for real, when I saw that last panel.

    Damn.

  37. Bloody_Jerk
    Bloody_Jerk
    August 12, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    What the… Oh what the…. Damn you, Willis!

  38. diremoi
    diremoi
    August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    See I knew Mr. and Mrs. Brown weren’t going to win the “worst parents” award, but I thought that would go to the Walkertons.

    And then Amber’s dad. :C

    • wynne
      wynne
      August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      As far as we know, the Walkertons, the Warners, and Amber’s mom are the only normal, functional, loving parents in this entire damn universe.

      Though I guess Dina’s are too.

      • Nono
        Nono
        August 12, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

        Keeners as well, I’m assuming?

        • David Willis
          David M Willis
          August 12, 2013 at 1:45 am | #

          they’re secretly vampires

          • AsimovSideburns
            AsimovSideburns
            August 12, 2013 at 3:00 am | #

            They feed by slowly leeching away your faith.

            If you let them take too much, you turn into a godless heathen atheist vampire, too.

            • Makkabee
              Makkabee
              August 13, 2013 at 3:43 am | #

              Cool! I’ll miss garlic, but I’ve always wanted to be able to rock a cape like vampires do.

              Also if I’ve learned anything from Hammer Films, it’s that vampires are lesbians. I’ve always wanted to be a lesbian.

        • wynne
          wynne
          August 12, 2013 at 1:54 am | #

          Augh of course! The Keeners seem like the best of the bunch! My apologies, Dorothy. Even if they are vampires.

      • Shade
        Shade
        August 12, 2013 at 11:16 am | #

        You’re forgetting Joe’s dad, who if his son is any indication is a pretty nice and stable guy. Who just really likes the ladies.

        • Blue
          Blue
          August 12, 2013 at 3:16 pm | #

          I’d be willing to give Joe’s dad the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for that creepy scene with Sarah.

      • Regalli
        Regalli
        August 12, 2013 at 2:04 pm | #

        I’m reserving judgment on the Walkertons. Don’t forget they’ve clearly got issues with Sal.

      • Nezumi
        Nezumi
        March 23, 2016 at 7:03 pm | #

        Given the fact that autism seems to be at least partly hereditary, Dina’s probable autism (She shows a massive number of the signs of it), and what we saw of her parents and their similar behavior, there’s a decent chance they’re all autistic. Which can still potentially count as “normal”, depending, but…

  39. Jonrock411
    Jonrock411
    August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    We should have seen this coming, it was right under our noses. We just didn’t see it. Much like Dina.

  40. dethtoll
    dethtoll
    August 12, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    In the immortal words of Ingwit_Agenbite:

    oh fucking no

    • Baroncognito
      Baroncognito
      August 12, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      I prefer “Oh, John Ringo, NO!”

      • dethtoll
        dethtoll
        August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

        I had to look that up. I think I like mine better because as a reaction to few creepy, badly written books (though holy SHIT creepy!) it’s less full of abject terror than the reaction to the creation of SWAP.AVI.

  41. Bemmie
    Bemmie
    August 12, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    First the emotional car wreck that was Joyce’s family… calm us all down with some gentle Billie/Ruth time…

    …then OMGWTF THIS?!?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

      Enjoying your emotional roller-coaster ride? 😀

      • Bemmie
        Bemmie
        August 12, 2013 at 1:31 am | #

        YES! no… Yes… umm NO!?! ummm WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

  42. EdoKara
    EdoKara
    August 12, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    sweet jesus, run for your lives! THE COMING OF FAZ IS UPON IS!

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      August 12, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      Really setting yourself up for some innuendo, there.

      • Phillip Wilde
        Phillip Wilde
        August 12, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

        Now that’s what I call a sticky situation.

      • AgentKeen
        AgentKeen
        August 12, 2013 at 1:00 am | #

        Faz would like to share with you this short animation depicting the hallowed event. Faz assures you that everything is indeed to actual scale and has not been altered.

        • Zuche
          Zuche
          August 12, 2013 at 4:28 pm | #

          It’s been awhile since I laughed until I couldn’t breathe. Thank you for that.

  43. Alfougin
    Alfougin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    Amber’s face in the third panel is the one of someone who has just learned their day has gone profoundly wrong.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      If she had a drink, it would have been a spittake.

  44. Sporky
    Sporky
    August 12, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    SHIT

  45. Vivvav
    Vivvav
    August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    OH HELL.

  46. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    I bet that THIS Faz has many and varied graphs and pie-charts ready to show on his iPad.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      Hell, he probably MADE the chart App. Faz in this universe is a budding millionaire for the most interactive chart app in the world.

  47. Lone Wolf
    Lone Wolf
    August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    VERY SHIT! D=

  48. Raen
    Raen
    August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    …oh fuck.

    I suddenly believe the Browns might be a distant second.

  49. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    August 12, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    Oh, hey, I found the perfect shirt for Dina at the mall the other day.

    So next time she gets swept along there with the crowd, she’ll have something to look for. 😀

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 12, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      +1 LIKED!

  50. Tarkada
    Tarkada
    August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

    Amber’s dad doesn’t seem like as bad a fellow. Marriages break-down all the time and you can’t blame someone for remarrying. He appears to be a better father just because he is at least there and with his son ,who must be younger than Amber to not be in college or work of his own, but then again his son doesn’t seem to be so young that he didn’t cheat on his wife…so hes prolly still dixkish

    • wynne
      wynne
      August 12, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      Given Willis’ comment and that look on his face… I’m going to say he’s just as bad.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

      In the other ‘verse, he was emotionally and physically abusive. That’s why all the wailing and gnashing of teeth.

    • Raen
      Raen
      August 12, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

      Joyce’s father didn’t seem that bad at first, either.

    • vsophi
      vsophi
      August 12, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

      Clearly you didn’t read Shortpacked!.

      • Rachel
        Rachel
        August 12, 2013 at 4:24 pm | #

        Whiiiich please recall Willis saying is totally unnecessary to enjoy this story.

        • David Willis
          David M Willis
          August 12, 2013 at 4:31 pm | #

          Yeah, leave folks alone for not reading a billion other comics!

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:11 am | #

      Faz has been called step-brother, not half-brother. So no cheating required, no genetic relation.

  51. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

    OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.

    We just got a swerve.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      August 12, 2013 at 1:25 am | #

      Is it the Vince Russo Swerve or what?

      • Ragnal
        Ragnal
        August 12, 2013 at 12:43 pm | #

        No, a Vince Russo swerve requires it to be a swerve everyone saw coming, but they take it in another direction where, really, there was no point in attempting the swerve to begin with.

        This is a swerve nobody expected, nobody saw coming. So good on Willis for pulling this off.

  52. Philippe G.
    Philippe G.
    August 12, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

    GASP!
    (Is it me or does Blaine make an entrance like a silver age comic book villain?)

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      I’m thinking like that time Darkseid broke into Scott Free’s house, and was just chilling in a chair.

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

        Here it is: http://comicsalliance.com/superman-sex-tape/

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 11:02 am | #

          That’s hilarious!

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      August 12, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

      Quick offer him a Hostess Fruit Pie!

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:38 am | #

        Or a Justice Fruit Pie.

  53. Potato-The-Faaace
    Potato-The-Faaace
    August 12, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

    I new Faz would end up here eventually! Oh and Amber’s wanted-by-the-mafia Dad.

  54. Eagle Has Landed
    Eagle Has Landed
    August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    Yay, Faz! 😀

  55. SUGauthor
    SUGauthor
    August 12, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    Nothing could have prepared me for this moment.

  56. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    August 12, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    No. No no. No no no no nonononononononononononOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *Jumps out window*

    …I’ll be back when the awkward goes awaaaaaaay…if I survive this fa*CRNCH*

  57. JebJeb
    JebJeb
    August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Also notice his left eye. It looks like that twitch that people get when they see something they don’t like much.

  58. Raibean
    Raibean
    August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Oh gods how did faz get here

  59. CapedLuigisYoshi
    CapedLuigisYoshi
    August 12, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Oh jeez I mean I was expecting to see Faz at some point but this isn’t how I wanted it

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

      How did you want it? Rectally?

      • Drunken Nordmann
        Drunken Nordmann
        August 12, 2013 at 5:56 pm | #

        He’ll make you feel all warm and fazzy inside. 😮

  60. Psycho
    Psycho
    August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    Amber! SMASH THE LAPTOP OVER HIS HEAD AND RUN! DO IT NOW!

  61. Aizat
    Aizat
    August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    In the words of Jim Ross: “OH, SON OF A bongo!”

    • Pyr05
      Pyr05
      August 12, 2013 at 12:40 am | #

      To follow with more immortal words “Not like this! No, not like this!”

      Also, “Stone Cold! Stone Cold! Stone Cold!”

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

        Though, it could be amusing seeing Stone Cold walk in and beat everyone up.

        • Doctor Lantern
          Doctor Lantern
          August 12, 2013 at 3:19 am | #

          Does that mean someone is going to open up a can of whoopass?

          • ArkhamTexan
            ArkhamTexan
            August 12, 2013 at 10:59 am | #

            “I, the Great Faz, shall–hey, does anyone else hear glass breaking…?”

  62. Aroooo
    Aroooo
    August 12, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    Spidey sense is tingling! Amazi-Girl is going to make a surprise appearance and show Faz what an obtuse triangle looks like…on his leg.

  63. rachel
    rachel
    August 12, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

    OMFG AAAHHHHHH DID NOT SEE THIS COMING

    • rachel
      rachel
      August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

      aaahahaha wait you guys though wait, amber’s mom is totally getting it on, “sorry honey I’m here at IU but uhhhh won’t be around til later okaybye!”

      • Kiggy
        Kiggy
        August 12, 2013 at 1:33 am | #

        That was my first thought. She and Dr. Rosenthal must be doing the 2 back beast as of now.

        • GrrArg42
          GrrArg42
          August 13, 2013 at 10:24 pm | #

          I just caught this and looked through the comments to see if anyone else did… Point to Rachel.

  64. John
    John
    August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    So… odds that the other Saruyamas are just standing quietly just out of frame not making eye contact with anyone?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

      They’re obviously behind the door.

      • Rheinman
        Rheinman
        August 12, 2013 at 7:07 am | #

        This!

        • Squall
          Squall
          August 12, 2013 at 8:20 am | #

          That!

  65. Shark
    Shark
    August 12, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    Oh snap.

  66. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    August 12, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

    I’m gonna be honest. I’m glad to see faz. He always puts a smile on my face.

    • David
      David
      August 12, 2013 at 12:25 am | #

      You cruel, evil person.

  67. Gottawonder
    Gottawonder
    August 12, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

    Oh shit. I hope the Saruyamas are behind the door. Amber is going to need them. And Sarah’s baseball bat.

  68. BayoWolf
    BayoWolf
    August 12, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

    Oh boy. Ok, What comment record do you think these two will set compared to the Browns?

  69. Romanticide
    Romanticide
    August 12, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

    Run Amber! Run!!! D: D: Even Dinah knows this ain’t good D:

  70. Aizat
    Aizat
    August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

    I’m going to give Blaine the benefit of a doubt here. New continuity could mean a new characterization.

    • Keroshino
      Keroshino
      August 12, 2013 at 1:51 am | #

      This! I would like it if Blaine was actually a decent father to Amber and not the “piece of shit” that he was in Shortpacked..

      I mean at least he shows up to visit Amber!

      Also I love that this comic solves the longest mystery…
      That Faz exists in the DoA universe…Yaaay!

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        August 12, 2013 at 2:09 am | #

        He’s apparently still kinda a piece of shit…just less of one.

      • Ancestral Hamster
        Ancestral Hamster
        August 12, 2013 at 3:00 am | #

        Blaine might be visiting Amber for his own selfish reasons, and not out of any benign motives. So he could still be the “piece of shit” that he was in Shortpacked.

        To save time, let’s assume he’s just as bad as in DoA and feed him feet first into a wood chipper.

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          August 12, 2013 at 2:03 pm | #

          Don’t forget how he visited in Shortpacked!, as well.

          He may not have been trying to take her back with him the second time, but still… Death is FAR too good for that asshat.

  71. nothri
    nothri
    August 12, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

    I would say “Oh SNAP”, but I fear there are not enough Oh nor Snaps to properly convey the magnitude warrant by the snapping of this particular Oh.

    • nothri
      nothri
      August 12, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

      Also, taking all bets. Will Faz, established to already know who his sister is, still have a creepy obsession with sleeping with her?

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        August 12, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

        Yes.

  72. Pyr05
    Pyr05
    August 12, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

    He has that look in his eye that tells just hints to me that he has to tell the neighbours of his criminal convictions when he moves.

  73. Leorale
    Leorale
    August 12, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

    I’m surprised at all the surprise. I called that some other family would be the hugest jerks, specifically because I thought that Blaine would be too unsurprising for the long-time readers. Bad guess, me!

  74. Brian Lynch
    Brian Lynch
    August 12, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

    When I mentioned Joyce’s travails on Tumblr, Willis said that the worst wasn’t even here yet. “How could it get worse?” I thought. OH GOD, I SHOULD HAVE REALIZED.

  75. Todd
    Todd
    August 12, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

    I was actually hoping we could avoid Faz in this universe.

  76. Lord Fuhrer President Penguin
    Lord Fuhrer President Penguin
    August 12, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

    oh hai Faz

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:14 am | #

      How is your sex life?

  77. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    August 12, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

    By the end of this scene, we are going to look wistfully at Joyce’s parents, and think about how sweet and kind they seem by comparison.

  78. Aizat
    Aizat
    August 12, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

    I think Blaine’s eyes are twitching because he heard his ex-wife is here.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 2:10 am | #

      It’s twitching because he’s never been in a room with Faz for this long.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        August 12, 2013 at 8:30 am | #

        He’s been standing there for hours. Waiting. Waiting for the perfect moment to jump out like a Bond villain.

        “Amber, I’ve been expecting you.”

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          August 12, 2013 at 10:58 am | #

          He accidentally left his Swivel chair at home.

          • Squall
            Squall
            August 12, 2013 at 11:12 am | #

            I wonder what they were talking about to fill the time

            • Squall
              Squall
              August 12, 2013 at 11:45 am | #

              http://squallloir.tumblr.com/post/58063935036/dont-mind-me-just-practicing-my-face

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          August 12, 2013 at 11:20 am | #

          So, where’s the white cat?

          • The Candyman
            The Candyman
            August 12, 2013 at 2:46 pm | #

            Faz is the white cat.

  79. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    August 12, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

    Okay, REAL LIFE FAMILY VISTING COLLEGE STORY TIME.

    So I went to college. On my very first regular weekend after orientation, my parents came to visit and say hi! So, they arrived, and I didn’t really know very many people well, so I just introduced my parents to everybody whose name I knew.

    Me: “Hi Mom, this is Paul.”

    Mom: “Hi, Paul!”

    Me: “Hi Mom, this is Jason.”

    Mom: “Hi, Jason!”

    Me: “Hi Mom, this is Becky.”

    Mom: “OH!!!!!!!!! JOHN KNOWS A FEEEEEEMALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    At the top of her lungs.

    In the lounge of the largest dorm.

    On a Saturday evening.

    By the time I graduated, I was hearing the story from faculty and students who weren’t even enrolled at the time.

    • Ridureyu
      Ridureyu
      August 12, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

      I miss my Mom so much…

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

        Oh, my condolences.

      • Pyr05
        Pyr05
        August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

        You made me laugh, and now you made me sad.

        • Ridureyu
          Ridureyu
          August 12, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

          That’s what I did to myself in that order!

          “Man, this was such a funny memor…oh…”

          • someguywithakatana
            someguywithakatana
            August 12, 2013 at 2:18 pm | #

            Your mom sounds like a really nice version of Joyce’s mom. I mean that in the best possible way.

  80. Z3tto
    Z3tto
    August 12, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

    Hmm. I could swear that Willis said somewhere that Faz doesn’t exist in this universe, but I’m probably remembering that wrong.

    And I’m indifferent towards Faz, but I really hope he doesn’t go the “We’re not related by blood, so it’s okay for us to bang!” route. I know Willis has more class than that, but I just really dislike that trope.

    • Z3tto
      Z3tto
      August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

      …just realized that I thought for some reason that Faz said he was adopted. Nevermind that last part then.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        August 12, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

        Willis may have more class than that, but Faz doesn’t.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          August 12, 2013 at 2:10 am | #

          Faz is like School on Sunday.

  81. Archivist
    Archivist
    August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

    Aaaaaaaaaaaaah D:

  82. vsophi
    vsophi
    August 12, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

    OHMYGODIT’SFAZ

  83. Potatamoto
    Potatamoto
    August 12, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

    By the Sword of Crom and the power of Cheese, no!

    …I’m getting popcorn.

  84. PatBaer
    PatBaer
    August 12, 2013 at 12:46 am | #

    Oh no, Faz.

  85. Chronos
    Chronos
    August 12, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    … I’m mildly surprised. Hi Faz.

  86. Aizat
    Aizat
    August 12, 2013 at 12:54 am | #

    And to quote Mike Tenay: “OH SHIT, IT’S FAZ!”

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      August 12, 2013 at 1:00 am | #

      Never mind that shit, here comes Faz!

  87. MM
    MM
    August 12, 2013 at 12:55 am | #

    DAMN YOU, WILLIS!

    Yes, I know it’s been said. It bore repeating.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      August 12, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

      Try saying it in another language. Like in Japanese, for example. ONORE WILLIS!

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        August 12, 2013 at 2:11 am | #

        Damn you, Willisuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

        • Andiemus
          Andiemus
          August 12, 2013 at 3:25 am | #

          Wirrisuuuuuu

      • Drunken Nordmann
        Drunken Nordmann
        August 12, 2013 at 6:01 pm | #

        SEI VERDAMMT, WILLIS!

        • Drunken Nordmann
          Drunken Nordmann
          August 12, 2013 at 6:02 pm | #

          Like that?

  88. Skemono
    Skemono
    August 12, 2013 at 12:58 am | #

    Well, this crushes my dreams that Faz would be a university dean in this universe… but at least he’s shown up!

  89. ArchonMalys
    ArchonMalys
    August 12, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

    Just when i was about to settle on the worst parents A NEW CHALLENGER ARISES

  90. Justnobody
    Justnobody
    August 12, 2013 at 1:01 am | #

    WWWWWWWWWWWWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS

  91. Clodia
    Clodia
    August 12, 2013 at 1:03 am | #

    Oh my god. This was unexpected.

  92. Jetstream
    Jetstream
    August 12, 2013 at 1:09 am | #

    The question: Is Faz still in to Amber despite knowing his status as her brother?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      August 12, 2013 at 1:16 am | #

      I hope not. Incest is never a good thing no matter how many dou…er..I mean reading materials that I’ve read.

    • Hoboturtle
      Hoboturtle
      August 12, 2013 at 9:38 am | #

      Considering his reaction when he found out in Shortpacked, I think not.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:15 am | #

      Step-brother, it’s not incest.

  93. Everyl
    Everyl
    August 12, 2013 at 1:12 am | #

    I like the way Blaine and Faz are so suspicious that even Dina caught on that Amber would need a warning before encountering them.

    • Andiemus
      Andiemus
      August 12, 2013 at 3:24 am | #

      I think she just saw ambers reaction.

  94. Dierna
    Dierna
    August 12, 2013 at 1:13 am | #

    STEP brother not half brother?! Hopefully Blaine adopted him. It’s illegal for adopted siblings to be together….

  95. Ben
    Ben
    August 12, 2013 at 1:15 am | #

    Just saying, Faz and Joyce need to meet… It would be awesome. I’d eat popcorn.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 2:12 am | #

      Let faz teach you about the penis.

  96. K. Ivan Ruppert
    K. Ivan Ruppert
    August 12, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

    Oh gods. Faz is a smarmy teenager. That is so perfect. I want him and Howard to become friends so that Faz can try to teach Howard to be as “Great” as he is, and then they have great adventures in never ever getting someone with female parts to ever touch them

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      August 12, 2013 at 2:13 am | #

      If no one makes this spinoff I’m gonna be mad.

      • Tomas
        Tomas
        August 12, 2013 at 2:25 am | #

        “Faz and Howard in the morrr-ning!”

        • vsophi
          vsophi
          August 12, 2013 at 8:57 am | #

          Some references should not be made.

    • andmangrewproud
      andmangrewproud
      August 12, 2013 at 2:53 am | #

      Shut up and take my page views!

    • Notebooked
      Notebooked
      August 12, 2013 at 3:27 pm | #

      “One babe-slayer is more than sufficient. A team-up of two babe-slayers will demolish all competition. Faz has constructed this graph, projecting how many feminine nymphs will embrace us the following nights.”
      “Heck yeah! I just have to soundproof my room so my mom doesn’t hear!”
      “Faz is having second thoughts.”

  97. Kiggy
    Kiggy
    August 12, 2013 at 1:38 am | #

    Ok I never read Shortpacked, so I’m correctly assuming that Blaine and Faz are Satan and the Anti-Christ?

    • wynne
      wynne
      August 12, 2013 at 2:01 am | #

      Faz is…. Faz. He’s a creep, and has the potential to be dangerous, but is otherwise an annoying, smarmy idiot.

      Blaine on the other hand, is evil. He is a criminal who abused Amber and her mother while putting them in danger from the Korean mafia. He is so evil that Mike wore a party hat and a Hawaiian shirt to his funeral (while flipping off his corpse).

      • Andiemus
        Andiemus
        August 12, 2013 at 3:23 am | #

        That’s pretty business as usual for mike.

        • ender1200
          ender1200
          August 12, 2013 at 5:27 am | #

          You might think this, but context makes all the difference.
          http://www.shortpacked.com/2012/comic/book-14/01-deady-dearest/lastrespects/

          • Featherstone
            Featherstone
            August 12, 2013 at 12:57 pm | #

            Heh Mike makes everything better…

            Wish sooo much that things go better in this ‘verse.

          • Regalli
            Regalli
            August 12, 2013 at 2:06 pm | #

            And this as well.

            http://www.shortpacked.com/2012/comic/book-14/01-deady-dearest/great/

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        August 12, 2013 at 8:39 am | #

        In Shortpacked! Faz is creepy but mostly ineffectual (so far). It’s a function of his colossal laziness.

        • K. Ivan Ruppert
          K. Ivan Ruppert
          August 12, 2013 at 9:04 am | #

          Not really so much laziness as total lack of self-awareness.

          • timemonkey
            timemonkey
            August 12, 2013 at 11:17 am | #

            It’s hard to think clearly when all your blood is constantly in your penis.

  98. Twirls
    Twirls
    August 12, 2013 at 2:09 am | #

    I kinda like how (probably coincidentally) Amber’s reaction seems to be shielding Dina from their evil.

  99. Comrade
    Comrade
    August 12, 2013 at 2:10 am | #

    MY BODY IS NOT READY

  100. Aeron
    Aeron
    August 12, 2013 at 2:31 am | #

    David Willis: Responding to rumors in one universe with confirmation in another.

  101. Bronze Knight
    Bronze Knight
    August 12, 2013 at 2:33 am | #

    The best part of this is that while Amber is madly searching for the door nob shes going to end up with a handfull of Dina’s boobs.

  102. AsimovSideburns
    AsimovSideburns
    August 12, 2013 at 2:38 am | #

    I saw them and could not stop myself from saying, out loud, in a terrified whisper, “No… no. Oh god.”

  103. Acher4
    Acher4
    August 12, 2013 at 2:40 am | #

    What the…

    Ffffffffffffffffffffffu…

  104. Spammy McSpamster
    Spammy McSpamster
    August 12, 2013 at 2:41 am | #

    ABOUT TIME!

  105. Timinane
    Timinane
    August 12, 2013 at 2:48 am | #

    Oh god NOOOOOOOOOOO!

  106. CaptMuffin
    CaptMuffin
    August 12, 2013 at 2:54 am | #

    Faz is here? FAZ!?
    DID SOMEBODY SAY BEST CHARACTER!?

  107. Tunaro
    Tunaro
    August 12, 2013 at 2:57 am | #

    FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  108. Tenn
    Tenn
    August 12, 2013 at 3:13 am | #

    “Hello, Amber. I am here to destroy your life. Won’t that be nice?”

  109. rustygreenscales
    rustygreenscales
    August 12, 2013 at 3:16 am | #

    At least this Faz gets a father figure in his life. Sorta.

  110. Toad
    Toad
    August 12, 2013 at 3:35 am | #

    *Quietly nopes into the sunset*

  111. LadySoll
    LadySoll
    August 12, 2013 at 3:40 am | #

    Perfect timing, just perfect. Can’t wait to see where this goes!!!!

  112. marky-marcus
    marky-marcus
    August 12, 2013 at 3:44 am | #

    OH SHIT

  113. Martin S Smith
    Martin S Smith
    August 12, 2013 at 3:55 am | #

    Dina and Faz would be a great couple!

  114. Beachfox
    Beachfox
    August 12, 2013 at 3:59 am | #

    Just one panel of Blaine’s face is enough to know that he can’t die soon enough in this universe as well.

  115. Josh
    Josh
    August 12, 2013 at 4:08 am | #

    Yes!

  116. Darth Cariss
    Darth Cariss
    August 12, 2013 at 4:16 am | #

    Faz was one of my favorite SP! characters. I hope he’s more like Faz first was, when he was more of a threat and a functional person and not just “the weird guy” that he later became for a joke every now and then.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:18 am | #

      How can Faz be a threat at a school he doesn’t even go to?

  117. Crumplepunch
    Crumplepunch
    August 12, 2013 at 4:34 am | #

    I think kung fu is going to happen.

  118. Silent_Thunder
    Silent_Thunder
    August 12, 2013 at 4:50 am | #

    Oh hey, it’s Faz. Yay for Faz. 😐

  119. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    August 12, 2013 at 5:11 am | #

    Ah! Amber’s Dad!
    AHHH!!! FAZ!!!

  120. Deemah
    Deemah
    August 12, 2013 at 5:58 am | #

    I don’t know what’s worse… Amber’s Dad is pretty shit

  121. Bugberry
    Bugberry
    August 12, 2013 at 6:39 am | #

    I’m having Evangelion flashbacks.

    • Varangian
      Varangian
      August 12, 2013 at 1:08 pm | #

      Somehow I think even Gendo is a preferable father to have compared to Blaine.

  122. Jimmy
    Jimmy
    August 12, 2013 at 6:56 am | #

    Are you friggin’ friggin’ me?

  123. Jackson
    Jackson
    August 12, 2013 at 7:00 am | #

    Well crap, we had a good run. Hello, Faz.

  124. Biege
    Biege
    August 12, 2013 at 7:18 am | #

    well, crap. I pray Ambers dad is less of an asshole in this universe.

    also, damnt Faz

  125. Mike
    Mike
    August 12, 2013 at 7:19 am | #

    When Dina said Amber’s family I thought it would be Joe Sr. and Amber’s mom doing their thing, not the two worst people in the world.

  126. showler
    showler
    August 12, 2013 at 7:20 am | #

    Maybe Danny will drop by and drive them both to suicide?

  127. Zombie
    Zombie
    August 12, 2013 at 7:29 am | #

    So this is my first comic by Willis, can someone explain to me why Amber’s dad is so bad? And her step-brother?

    • theKOT
      theKOT
      August 12, 2013 at 11:02 am | #

      I would also like to know.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      August 12, 2013 at 11:22 am | #

      Well, we don’t know what they’re like in this version so we’re just reacting to what they were like in the other universe. Over there they’re very unpleasant. Faz is a huge pervert, power hungry, opportunistic and generally horrible but on the ineffective side. He exists largely for humour, horrifying humour but humour nonetheless. Amber’s dad was a physically and emotionally abusive asshole who cheated on her mother a lot leaving her half-siblings all over the place, including Faz who was totally into her up until shortly before he found out she was his sister, and had Korean mafia ties that got Amber’s family’s life put in danger.

      • showler
        showler
        August 12, 2013 at 9:07 pm | #

        The thought of a Faz who is being raised by Amber’s father is not a pleasant thought.

  128. Björn
    Björn
    August 12, 2013 at 7:54 am | #

    So is this Amazi-Girl’s rogues gallery?

  129. Tomaj
    Tomaj
    August 12, 2013 at 8:00 am | #

    WHAT THE FAZ

  130. Notebooked
    Notebooked
    August 12, 2013 at 8:05 am | #

    Eee! So the best-case scenario here is that Amber’s dad left Amber’s mom and got together with Faz’s mom. The slightly worse case scenario is that Amber’s dad cheated on Amber’s mom. The absolute worst case scenario is horrible and not worth considering.

  131. GoldStarz
    GoldStarz
    August 12, 2013 at 8:20 am | #

    My one regret is that now I’ll never see the Faz virus… Unless Faz is Patient Zero, and it only started becoming contagious once he came to the area.

    • The Candyman
      The Candyman
      August 12, 2013 at 8:34 am | #

      Soon he shall infect us all.

      • GoldStarz
        GoldStarz
        August 12, 2013 at 2:23 pm | #

        As you can see by this chart… Oh god it’s spreading already.

  132. Aaron
    Aaron
    August 12, 2013 at 8:30 am | #

    Dammit Willis, don’t do this! I can’t hang with so much drama!

  133. The Candyman
    The Candyman
    August 12, 2013 at 8:37 am | #

    I remember when I said Joyce’s parents didnt actually stirr up any kind of hatred from me, even when they were being horrible.

    Amber’s dad has been around for two seconds and I want to punch him through a wall.

  134. Jack Finch
    Jack Finch
    August 12, 2013 at 8:41 am | #

    Well Willis, you warned us that the worst parents were yet to come.

  135. Tomb
    Tomb
    August 12, 2013 at 8:47 am | #

    I kind of hate her dad for having a question mark after “Amber”. As if he did not Immediatly recognize his own daughter.

    • khambatta
      khambatta
      August 12, 2013 at 11:00 am | #

      Ooh. Witness protection name change?

  136. Tufto
    Tufto
    August 12, 2013 at 8:54 am | #

    Faz! Woo! 😀

    And Amber’s dad. Not so woo. 🙁

  137. Bunivasal
    Bunivasal
    August 12, 2013 at 8:59 am | #

    Amazing character design. I already hate him more than every anime villain from my childhood.

    In other news, everyone may want to evacuate Indiana, as I’ll be nuking it from orbit now.

  138. Morgauxo
    Morgauxo
    August 12, 2013 at 9:08 am | #

    Haz Faz been hitting on Dina? If so, did she even understand what he was up to?

  139. sarpiedon
    sarpiedon
    August 12, 2013 at 9:21 am | #

    Ack! its Faz…
    So here he’s Amber’s Step brother not Half brother.
    probably still has a thing for Amber , but in this Universe it’s Legal!
    (no less creepy though, cuz…hey…its Faz…)

    • Dierna
      Dierna
      August 12, 2013 at 2:57 pm | #

      Ah but if Blaine adopted Faz then as her adopted brother it would be illegal for them to be together.

  140. Hoboturtle
    Hoboturtle
    August 12, 2013 at 9:53 am | #

    Hey, it’s Faz and… Amber’s older brother. Seriously Blaine looks ridiculously young.

  141. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    August 12, 2013 at 11:24 am | #

    Just turn around and walk away Amber.

  142. MrJrSr
    MrJrSr
    August 12, 2013 at 11:41 am | #

    Maybe he’s not the abusive nut sack as he was in shortpacked and Maybe faz is… no screw it in any reality Faz is still Faz

  143. Charles RB
    Charles RB
    August 12, 2013 at 12:20 pm | #

    NOOOOOOOOO!!!

  144. Hoboturtle
    Hoboturtle
    August 12, 2013 at 12:45 pm | #

    Wait… wasn’t Dina with her family?

    • The Candyman
      The Candyman
      August 12, 2013 at 12:51 pm | #

      They’re hiding behind the door.

  145. SeanNOLA
    SeanNOLA
    August 12, 2013 at 12:47 pm | #

    Faz\Dina

  146. Hotsauce
    Hotsauce
    August 12, 2013 at 12:51 pm | #

    I am already squirming with discomfort

  147. Temporal Loop
    Temporal Loop
    August 12, 2013 at 12:51 pm | #

    As soon as I saw them, I said “nononononono” out loud. And then snarled.

    I was not prepared for this.

  148. Alexis
    Alexis
    August 12, 2013 at 1:10 pm | #

    DUCK AND COVER

  149. The Candyman
    The Candyman
    August 12, 2013 at 1:14 pm | #

    Amber’s dad is going to pervishly hit on Billie. Calling it now.

    Mainly because it’s exactly the thing you’d expect that fucker to do.

  150. Angel
    Angel
    August 12, 2013 at 1:23 pm | #

    I hope this guy isn’t in with the Korean mafia

  151. Nym
    Nym
    August 12, 2013 at 1:24 pm | #

    On the plus side, at least Amber does not have the trauma of being biologically related to Faz in this universe?

    . . . Or maybe that is a reveal just waiting for the next storyline.

  152. Baker
    Baker
    August 12, 2013 at 1:47 pm | #

    I feel like her dad married the woman he was having an affair with, and also abandoned the hell out of Amber.

  153. Regalli
    Regalli
    August 12, 2013 at 2:01 pm | #

    Oh godDAMN I suspected it!

    Excuse me while I WEEP.

  154. AHR
    AHR
    August 12, 2013 at 3:53 pm | #

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA –takes a deep breath– AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    HOLY CRUMPETS I DID NOT SEE THAT ONE COMING

  155. Potatamoto
    Potatamoto
    August 12, 2013 at 4:03 pm | #

    One is suddenly forced to wonder about the line ‘she was going to be along later this afternoon.’

    Was this phrasing a deliberate attempt to avoid the double entendre of ‘she’d be coming later this afternoon’ and try to class this place up a little bit? Or was it a sadly missed opportunity?

  156. Gargamel
    Gargamel
    August 12, 2013 at 8:23 pm | #

    I wonder if Amber is surprised to find out her Dad is alive?
    (Secretly hopes that the Blaine* arrival means a sudden increase of crime in the area, squee!)

    *Now that’s a SuperVillain name if ever I heard one.

    • toddtr
      toddtr
      August 12, 2013 at 11:44 pm | #

      Glee figured out how good a villain name Blaine is 3 seasons ago

  157. Butts
    Butts
    August 12, 2013 at 8:32 pm | #

    FAZ!

    That’s all I wanted. Day made.

  158. Arkantos
    Arkantos
    August 12, 2013 at 9:24 pm | #

    Okay am I the only one who thinks Blaine looks like he’s about to start beating her up? The only people who wear the look he has on his face that I’ve met are complete sociopaths.

    • Arkantos
      Arkantos
      August 12, 2013 at 9:25 pm | #

      Oh hey I’m Ruth. I am totally okay with this.

    • rachel
      rachel
      August 12, 2013 at 10:29 pm | #

      blegh you are totally right, that is a total sociopath expression, isn’t it?

  159. AliaPie
    AliaPie
    August 12, 2013 at 10:39 pm | #

    Oh shit.

    I’m assuming Faz will find the worst person to fixate on. I can’t wait.

  160. KKoro
    KKoro
    August 12, 2013 at 11:13 pm | #

    It’s uncanny how much like my own dad this is.

  161. The Candyman
    The Candyman
    August 12, 2013 at 11:13 pm | #

    Actually, now that I think about it, Faz is probably going to be obsessed with Dorothy in this universe.

    When you can’t make it with your sister, go for the look-alike.

  162. Spencer the Tepig
    Spencer the Tepig
    August 13, 2013 at 5:38 am | #

    I feel for Amber in the third strip. Given the situation I totally would’ve screamed “FUCK!” In my mind.

  163. Volkai
    Volkai
    August 13, 2013 at 9:33 am | #

    There’s an error in the tags for this comic. It says “Faz”, not “The Great Faz”.

    Also, DYW because Amber’s dad.

  164. Remie
    Remie
    August 13, 2013 at 4:38 pm | #

    The great Faz returns XD

  165. Rin
    Rin
    August 15, 2013 at 7:45 am | #

    “AH! THE DEMONS ARE BACK! QUICK GET THE HOLY WATER AND A REALLY BAD CD TO FEND THEM OFF!” That is literally what flew through my mind the second I saw those two.

  166. Someone
    Someone
    August 22, 2013 at 10:33 am | #

    Can someone explain who these characters are? It’s clear that they are from the walkyverse, but I’m not familiar with it.

  167. Chris
    Chris
    October 10, 2014 at 4:44 pm | #

    No, no, no, NO, NO, NO NO NO NONONONONONONO
    WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!

Who should be the default doodle for Book 14?

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CONVENTION APPEARANCES


May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

David M Willis! avatar
David M Willis!
@damnyouwillis.bsky.social
reposted by David M Willis!
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Ryan North @ryannorth.ca ⋅ 4h
hey, FANTASTIC FOUR got an Eisner nomination for best ongoing series!! I think this news is... really great! Fantastic even :0
the cover of FF #1 featuring some beautiful art of said Fantastic Four
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 29min
oh no, new content over at the nsfw patreon joe introduces joyce to fingers that aren't breaded chicken www.patreon.com/posts/joe-fi...
tastefully cropped art of joe and joyce discovering the joys of fingers
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1h
I may have to pin this
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 10h
#relatable
header image - a man in a hospital gown says
media.tenor.com
a man in a hospital gown says " stop pooping " to another man
ALT: a man in a hospital gown says " stop pooping " to another man
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OSMOTE @osmote.net ⋅ 17h
Screenshot of Jonathan Frakes on the set of Beyond Belief
brendelbored.bsky.social's user avatarBrendel @brendelbored.bsky.social ⋅ 1y
Politico: Ever been slapped by breasts?
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Joshua J. Friedman @joshuajfriedman.com ⋅ 1d
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
The problems with this prosecution are legion, but most immediately, the
government cannot prosecute Judge Dugan because she is entitled to judicial immunity for her official acts. Immunity is not a defense to the prosecution to be determined later by a jury or court; it is an absolute bar to the prosecution at the outset. See Trump v. United States,
603 U.S. 593, 630 (2024).
joshgerstein.bsky.social's user avatarJosh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
storage.courtlistener.com

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
Dumbing of Age: "Up, continued" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomic #webcomics
www.dumbingofage.com
Up, continued
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The Onion @theonion.com ⋅ 1d
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore. theonion.com/you-can...
header image - You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
theonion.com
You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
I’ve loved movies ever since I was a little kid. Just stepping into that dark theater, with the smell of fresh popcorn, was like being transported to a whole other world. It used to be so magical. But now I’m thinking about boycotting movies altogether. Why? Because I can’t seem to watch one anymore without […]
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
GOTTEM
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
the 90s were a wild time. if i told you how many magazines there were you wouldnt even believe me
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Aubrey Gilleran @aubreygilleran.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908. "You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
atrupar.com's user avatarAaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 1d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
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Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social ⋅ 10d
1984 calendar meme reading 1529, the year of the first Ottoman siege of Vienna
spavel.bsky.social's user avatarPavel🐀 @spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 10d
Who can forget the Swiss-Austrian Union, or its famous capital - Istanbul.
AI generated ad by a company called Travello showing the 10 most visited cities in Europe, except the cities are hilariously poorly placed. London is in Wales, Paris is in Ireland, Rome is in France, Rom (yes like Rome but without an E) is in Spain, Barcelona is in Morocco, Prague is in Germany, Vienna is in Italy, Istanbul is in Austria, Milan is in Libya, and Antalya is correctly shown as in Turkey but is in the wrong place. Also a few of the borders like Switzerland and Austria or Hungary and Slovenia are missing.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
*at the very end of Andor, cassian travels through a vortex that makes everyone look a decade younger*
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
(May 14, 2026)
a bemused lucy watches as somebody collapses on her dorm room floor
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Up" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic #dofa
www.dumbingofage.com
Up
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
i mean i... guess there are people who want toy-accurate hyper-articulated original-toy-look guys but in cartoon colors for some reason
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Fuck you, Clayface!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
www.ebay.com/itm/23609982... selling my LG34 Mindwipe, minus Servant
header image - Transformers Generations TakaraTomy Legends LG34 Wipe (Mindwipe), incomplete | eBay
www.ebay.com
Transformers Generations TakaraTomy Legends LG34 Wipe (Mindwipe), incomplete | eBay
Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Transformers Generations TakaraTomy Legends LG34 Wipe (Mindwipe), incomplete at the best online prices at eBay! Free shipping for many pro...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Menace Level: up to date on his vaccinations
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Today in #9ChickweedLane I learned Gran is back from the grave so she can jerk it to furry porn with her daughter
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
www.ebay.com/itm/23609184... 5 hours left on my 4-jet titans return tidal wave
header image - Transformers Siege on Cybertron Titans Return Tidal Wave incomplete, restickered | eBay
www.ebay.com
Transformers Siege on Cybertron Titans Return Tidal Wave incomplete, restickered | eBay
Check out those stickers. They make him look pretty great, actually. That aircraft carrier mode shines. Tidal Wave is loose and incomplete! So there's only four (4) jets!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
confirming that the reason there's been no Galaxy Version female characters in Blokees until now is that they felt they needed to make Round Lady Thighs For Ladies
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Dumbing of Age: "For you" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
For you
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
y'know there's not an awful lot of rocketeering in The Rocketeer
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reposted by David M Willis!
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wint @dril.bsky.social ⋅ 4d
buddy you came to the wrong ass to fuck
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Man if they were arresting judges then this'd be the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard but thankfully that's not happening.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Stop making the one toy I want the super-expensive chase, Auldey!!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
And that's why you have Jesus wear a condom!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
It's #webcomicday? We have a special day??? Well, my name is Pat McHoarney and I draw 69 Mouse-Ear Blvd, a multigenerational story about women who all have sexy legs and probably other features. There was a grandmother, but she wasn't hot and so she died off-panel.
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