Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Sex is like

by David M Willis on April 6, 2014 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - I Was a Teenage Churchmouse
└ Tags: dorothy, joyce, monkey master, ultra car

Discussion (200) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    April 6, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    That is worse example ive ever seen.

    • OfCourse
      OfCourse
      April 6, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

      You mean the best?

    • Seerow
      Seerow
      April 6, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      Hard to say without having seen the episode.

      • Gram91
        Gram91
        April 6, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

        I wish to see this merger of hate.

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      April 6, 2014 at 2:17 am | #

      I keep stating at Panel 3 Joyce, which is the BEST I’ve ever seen

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        April 6, 2014 at 2:17 am | #

        staRing

        O_O like

      • Allcool-dontcare
        Allcool-dontcare
        April 6, 2014 at 11:46 am | #

        I choose panel 4 instead cause in 3 it slightly looks like her mouth is open. Plus it looks like she was staRing <- at that

  2. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    April 6, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    “It’s almost but not quite entirely unlike a cup of tea.”

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      It does get hot.

      • Lanval
        Lanval
        April 6, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

        And wet.

        • David Herbert
          David Herbert
          April 6, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

          And if you bump around enough things spill everywhere.

          • Seerow
            Seerow
            April 6, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

            And if you’re not careful you end up with blisters all over your genitals.

            • BowToTheBard
              BowToTheBard
              April 6, 2014 at 1:16 am | #

              Some people are into that, though.

              • Drunken Nordmann
                Drunken Nordmann
                April 6, 2014 at 7:37 am | #

                Some people are into everything, I reckon.

                • nothri
                  nothri
                  April 6, 2014 at 10:34 am | #

                  Everything has been into your mother.

                  For a nickel.

          • Roborat
            Roborat
            April 7, 2014 at 4:52 pm | #

            Sorry to hijack the thread, but in case you don’t know yet, your site has been hacked, gives a redirect to a porn site.

    • IncadescentFlame
      IncadescentFlame
      April 6, 2014 at 2:42 am | #

      At least it won’t get your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick. That would be ENTIRELY unlike tea.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        April 6, 2014 at 3:56 am | #

        Except for the unnecessary addition of lemon.

      • parkrndl
        parkrndl
        April 6, 2014 at 7:12 am | #

        And what YOU did… I see that too.

    • biggo
      biggo
      April 6, 2014 at 5:42 am | #

      @Jen: this comment section needs a LIKE button.

    • parkrndl
      parkrndl
      April 6, 2014 at 7:11 am | #

      I see what you did there.

  3. Geminia999
    Geminia999
    April 6, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    So, if Ultra Car exists in Dexter, and Carla is a thing…

    let me think about this for a bit

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      April 6, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

      Carla’s the voice actor, in my headcanon

      • LiaHansen
        LiaHansen
        April 6, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

        Oooh, that’s good.

      • GoldStarz
        GoldStarz
        April 6, 2014 at 12:38 am | #

        If she’s not her mom is, no exceptions.

        • arank11
          arank11
          April 6, 2014 at 12:58 am | #

          That’s it! You’ve uncovered Carla’s character!
          In the Dumbiverse, Carla’s mother was the creator of the Ultra Car TV show, and the voice actress for Ultra Car. She based the character design off of Carla. Thus, Carla grew up surrounded by Ultra Car stuff. Ultra Car became like a mother figure to her because her real mom was always working on the show. She grew up learning to hate the human race, that pies are always funny, and that the Amazon is a great place to dump people you hate. She wanted to be a robot like Ultra Car herself. To do so, she learned how to roller skate to simulate the act of moving around on wheels and wore fake glasses to simulate looking out of headlights. She wanted to be just like the robotic woman that she looked like!

          • LiaHansen
            LiaHansen
            April 6, 2014 at 1:16 am | #

            yesssss

          • Bill
            Bill
            April 6, 2014 at 4:11 am | #

            So where does Jerry Van Dyke fit into this?

            • Raoullefere
              Raoullefere
              April 6, 2014 at 8:39 am | #

              Same way he fits—or doesn’t—everywhere else.

  4. someguywithakatana
    someguywithakatana
    April 6, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Wow… I mean… I was just joking, but… apparently, I called it. Yay for me?

    • Deathjavu
      Deathjavu
      April 6, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      So you did. Impressive.

      (psst great oracle, what will happen next in the Amber storyline, I need to know)

      • someguywithakatana
        someguywithakatana
        April 6, 2014 at 12:44 am | #

        The quality of Amber’s life will continue to deteriorate harshly… I sense… Danny… and Sal… and… something called a wiggler…

        I also see Dina… hugging a stegosaurus plushie… She… declares herself the apex predator… and rolls around on the floor… gnawing playfully on the toy…

        • LKnives
          LKnives
          April 6, 2014 at 5:36 am | #

          When you are right, you will be rich beyond your dreams.

          • Seerow
            Seerow
            April 6, 2014 at 7:33 pm | #

            Nah, it just means he found a way to hack into Willis’s buffer.

    • caesaria82
      caesaria82
      April 6, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      lol that is amazing.

  5. Khaner
    Khaner
    April 6, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    The car of Ultra? Took him long enough to show up.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      April 6, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      Took who long enough?

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      April 6, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      who’s this “him”?

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        April 6, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

        Speaking of, is Ultra Car a car in the show?

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          April 6, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

          Yes.

          • Packy
            Packy
            April 6, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

            I was in the store today, and I saw something that made me wonder if the Mutant Frosted Honey Bun is in the Dexter and Monkey Master show.

            • LiaHansen
              LiaHansen
              April 6, 2014 at 12:35 am | #

              I feel like I saw that get mentioned somewhere. Like it appeared in the background of some merchandise or something.

            • Sergei Andropov
              Sergei Andropov
              April 6, 2014 at 2:11 am | #

              I assume the Giant Mutant Frosted Honey Bun is the university’s chancellor.

          • Charlie Spencer
            Charlie Spencer
            April 6, 2014 at 7:29 am | #

            Dumb-ass question, number 19 in the series; kids, collect them all!

            Is ‘Dexter and Monkey Master’ a ‘real’ TV show or is it a fictional part of DoA? If real, is there a network airing it? I haven’t heard of it outside the context of this comic.

            • NF
              NF
              April 6, 2014 at 8:22 am | #

              Dexter and Monkey Master is the conversion of a major part of the story in Willis’ other continuity into a kid’s television show for comedic purpose and story-driving purposes.

              • Daibhid C
                Daibhid C
                April 6, 2014 at 8:44 am | #

                Of course it’s real! It’s got a TV Tropes page! That makes it as real as Inspector Spacetime or Fix-It Felix, Jr!

                • Packy
                  Packy
                  April 6, 2014 at 9:42 am | #

                  I would pay good money to make Dexter and Monkey Master exist outside the Dumbiverse. Of course, it would have to be cell animation, not any of this 3D stuff. 😉

                • begbert2
                  begbert2
                  April 6, 2014 at 12:41 pm | #

                  Hmm, Packy, that raises the question of what medium Willis sees the show as actually being made in. We can’t assume based on anything we’ve seen so far; maybe it’s been a CG show the whole time.

                • Heavensrun
                  Heavensrun
                  April 6, 2014 at 1:50 pm | #

                  I am fairly sure that one of Willis’s favorite shows was the CG animated Beast Wars, and I would personally argue that TF Prime is at least considerably better looking than the original animated show.

                  But honestly, Dexter and Monkey Master would probably get criticized for being an Invader Zim ripoff if they made it now.

            • Heavensrun
              Heavensrun
              April 6, 2014 at 1:51 pm | #

              Google is your friend and loves you, you know.

              • Charlie Spencer
                Charlie Spencer
                April 6, 2014 at 4:35 pm | #

                Yeah, but the results are mostly ambiguous. Some refer to the Walkyverse incarnations, which I don’t look at but suspect I should discount / ignore. I can’t make heads or tails of the TV Tropes page. I know better than to bother with the ‘Dexter’s Lab’ results; I know series well enough to recognize it isn’t the one being referenced.

      • Dr. Zeus
        Dr. Zeus
        April 6, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

        Him is the car of Ultra, you know… Ultra Car’s car.

    • Deathjavu
      Deathjavu
      April 6, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      It? Her?

      I don’t think him is the correct pronoun in any interpretation.

      • David M Willis
        David M Willis
        April 6, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

        I mean, I put her pronoun right in there for everyone.

        • Deathjavu
          Deathjavu
          April 6, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

          Judging by a surprisingly large number of comments over the years, and going of my general internet experience, most people online apparently can’t read.

          I was confused too. I guess they’re just here for the pretty pictures?

          • MichaelHaneline
            MichaelHaneline
            April 6, 2014 at 4:15 am | #

            I… I can’t read the above comment.
            I’d ask someone to tell me what it says, but…

          • hof1991
            hof1991
            April 6, 2014 at 8:10 am | #

            NPR ran an April Fool’s story about how people don’t read anymore, but the article was just bait to see how many people would comment at length without bothering to read more than the headline. They got some hilariously long and detailed responses.

        • Khaner
          Khaner
          April 6, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

          Sorry. I generally ascociate her car form as male, and as Carla is Ultracar’s female body, assumed that tv show Ultra car was male. Stupid mistake, looking back.

          • PBManning
            PBManning
            April 6, 2014 at 1:12 am | #

            What’s important is that you are learning.

          • tinfoil theory
            tinfoil theory
            April 6, 2014 at 1:56 am | #

            In Italian, cars are always female.

            Frankly, I don’t understand why the Transformers™ aren’t universally female.

            • Jen Aside
              Jen Aside
              April 6, 2014 at 2:20 am | #

              Sexism from directors.

              • tinfoil theory
                tinfoil theory
                April 6, 2014 at 6:25 am | #

                But in biology, all life-forms that reproduce asexually are female, like algae, or whiptail lizards.

                Immortal starfaring shape-shifters are already a transhumanists wet dream. Would it really detract from it by admitting they are basically lesbian pirates form outer space?

                • Opus the Poet
                  Opus the Poet
                  April 6, 2014 at 2:36 pm | #

                  No, these are lesbian pirates from outer space http://rosalarian.com/lesbianpirates/

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              April 6, 2014 at 3:24 am | #

              I also Dispute that ships are also All Female.
              Like The Going Merry and Thousand Sunny!

              • Bill
                Bill
                April 6, 2014 at 4:14 am | #

                This is especially mind-blowing when the ship is in fact named for a male, such as the Andrea Doria or the Edmund Fitzgerald.

                • Roborat
                  Roborat
                  April 7, 2014 at 3:00 pm | #

                  And every active U.S. aircraft carrier.

              • John
                John
                April 6, 2014 at 7:10 am | #

                For example, the Joyce/Dorothy/Walky ship is 1/3 male.

            • biggo
              biggo
              April 6, 2014 at 5:55 am | #

              K.I.T.T had a male voice, though. Which always struck me as odd, because hey, she’s a car. Today, I use a female voice for my GPS because no car of mine would ever be a male.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 6, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

        I’ll just call it an it. All machines are its to me! All of them! Except Cyborgs.

        • MM
          MM
          April 6, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

          Technophobe.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            April 6, 2014 at 12:52 am | #

            ROBOTS ARE STEALING JOBS FROM HARD WORKING AMERICANS.

            • maxyai
              maxyai
              April 6, 2014 at 1:13 am | #

              Day tuk uur jobs!

            • Deathjavu
              Deathjavu
              April 6, 2014 at 1:54 am | #

              Sort of, but then it becomes someone’s job to design and fix the robots.

              And if the robots fix themselves? Well, then we hit a post scarcity society. Or the robots eradicate us since we’re now totally irrelevant. Either or.

              • Yotomoe
                Yotomoe
                April 6, 2014 at 2:37 am | #

                You say that as if they couldn’t Both happen :3.

              • tinfoil theory
                tinfoil theory
                April 6, 2014 at 2:49 am | #

                Eradicating all irrelevant species sounds an awful lot like work, though.

                • begbert2
                  begbert2
                  April 6, 2014 at 12:45 pm | #

                  Naw, you just stop feeding them. What are they going to do about it?

                • No Name
                  No Name
                  April 6, 2014 at 5:17 pm | #

                  @begbert2
                  Start feeding themselves again? There are going to be conspiracy theorists in every generation, they should have the resources to feed themselves at least.

              • Bill
                Bill
                April 6, 2014 at 4:18 am | #

                Deathjavu, I suggest you read the short story “Reason”, by Isaac Asimov.  It was part of the original “I, Robot” anthology.

  6. Cthulhu's Intern
    Cthulhu's Intern
    April 6, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    It’s clearly much more like that one episode in which Ultra Car teaches Monkey Master how to play the flute after the show jumped the shark. That was one good episode when the show started to suck.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

      Remember the episode that Ultra Car stranded them in the Amazon? The musical number in that one was FAN tastic.

      • Cthulhu's Intern
        Cthulhu's Intern
        April 6, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

        That song may have been catchy, but those lyrics were embarrassingly bad.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          April 6, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

          It’s a kid’s show. What’d ya expect?

    • Joe
      Joe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

      That episode was specifically a reference to American Pie. Alyson Hannigan guest starred and everything.
      Now that I think about it, it’s actually kinda impressive that they got away with those shoutouts in a kid’s cartoon.

      • Cthulhu's Intern
        Cthulhu's Intern
        April 6, 2014 at 12:50 am | #

        Dude. This was the same show that had the episode with the power booster rod. That episode was LOADED with double entendres. How is that surprising?

    • showler
      showler
      April 6, 2014 at 1:18 am | #

      How many crossovers did the two shows have?

      • Cthulhu's Intern
        Cthulhu's Intern
        April 6, 2014 at 1:42 am | #

        7.

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          April 6, 2014 at 2:22 am | #

          Don’t forget the one with Historical Jesus and Friends! Everyone forgets it because it was a limited edition Korean exclusive.

        • timemonkey
          timemonkey
          April 6, 2014 at 11:28 am | #

          5, two of them were two-parters so only count as one each.

          • Heavensrun
            Heavensrun
            April 6, 2014 at 2:11 pm | #

            Eh, there were still 7 individual episodes. It’s debatable.

            • Dean
              Dean
              April 6, 2014 at 10:56 pm | #

              Does ‘Battle of the Ultracars’ count, though, since it’s a dream episode? But I still can’t imagine how they got Johnny Cash as the voice of Evil Ultracar.

              • timemonkey
                timemonkey
                April 7, 2014 at 9:08 am | #

                Evil gender flipped Ultracar.

  7. Shrugs
    Shrugs
    April 6, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    “There’s not quite as much hatred of all humanity in sex. Usually.”

    • Drunken Nordmann
      Drunken Nordmann
      April 6, 2014 at 7:40 am | #

      Cue Mike.

  8. Mr K
    Mr K
    April 6, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    “I’ll show you, if you want”

  9. Psycho
    Psycho
    April 6, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Just gonna post this again if you think the Walky x Joyce x Dorothy OT3 ship should be called “Caramel and Marshmallows”, say I!

    • tinfoil theory
      tinfoil theory
      April 6, 2014 at 2:51 am | #

      “Aye!”

    • Khrene Cleaver
      Khrene Cleaver
      April 6, 2014 at 4:23 am | #

      Aye!

    • Jonathan S.
      Jonathan S.
      April 6, 2014 at 11:42 am | #

      Eye!

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      April 6, 2014 at 2:41 pm | #

      Ewe!

  10. John
    John
    April 6, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    So there’s a fictional Ultra Car in this world? If she gets turned into a girlbot in this universe too, Carla’s going to be so weirded out. (Can we say “Ultra Car” now?)

  11. newllend
    newllend
    April 6, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Oh I see, that makes perfect since.

    • nothri
      nothri
      April 6, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZwbTKYhvIY

  12. Pyr05
    Pyr05
    April 6, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Yay for analogies that DON’T apply to the point!

    • tinfoil theory
      tinfoil theory
      April 6, 2014 at 2:56 am | #

      It’s not how the universe began, but it’s a good way to relax.

  13. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    April 6, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    Can anyone explain this sex thing without referencing cartoons and anime?

    • Geminia999
      Geminia999
      April 6, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      Well I thought that was what the Birds and the Bees was about? I don’t know, never heard the whole speach so I still don’t know how a bird and bee have babies with each other.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        April 6, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

        Oh that’s easy, when a bird eats a bee, it turns into a stork.

        • MM
          MM
          April 6, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

          So then where does the cabbage patch fit into all this?

          • ninja_jesus
            ninja_jesus
            April 6, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

            The stork carries the cabbage seeds.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      April 6, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      It’s like a thing in which two things mesh together and stimulate receptors in the brain that tell you it feels good.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

      It’s like sticking your penis in a vagina repeatedly.
      Of course it’s not always like that.
      Sometimes it’s like having your vagina be pierced by a penis repeatedly.

      • caesaria82
        caesaria82
        April 6, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

        And sometimes there are no penises involved at all. Or no vaginas.

        • Ancestral Hamster
          Ancestral Hamster
          April 6, 2014 at 1:00 am | #

          And sometimes it involves a single goose feather, a tuning fork, and 5 lbs of malt-o-meal …

          • tinfoil theory
            tinfoil theory
            April 6, 2014 at 3:20 am | #

            Go on…

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              April 6, 2014 at 3:25 am | #

              Hands where I can see them.

              • Heavensrun
                Heavensrun
                April 6, 2014 at 2:14 pm | #

                “Well alright, but are you sure you want to see my penis?”

          • Bill
            Bill
            April 6, 2014 at 4:22 am | #

            Or an egg beater,
            and a live chicken,
            and some peach preserves!

    • Lanval
      Lanval
      April 6, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

      Well, for a first timer like Joyce, the most apt metaphor would likely be Ikea furniture.

      • Dr. Zeus
        Dr. Zeus
        April 6, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

        You follow the directions but it doesn’t really go as expected?

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          April 6, 2014 at 2:25 am | #

          Also, there are parts left over and they make you buy a Skorva you don’t need [or forget to tell you you DO need it [and a power drill]].

          • Dr.Zeus
            Dr.Zeus
            April 6, 2014 at 7:51 am | #

            A power drill eh? Kinky.

      • Shadlyn Wolfe
        Shadlyn Wolfe
        April 6, 2014 at 8:47 am | #

        So…this?

        http://sketched-comedy.com/comics/flying-blind

    • nothri
      nothri
      April 6, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

      “Alone time” with assistance?

    • Drakkin the Alien
      Drakkin the Alien
      April 6, 2014 at 1:37 am | #

      its like this:
      http://gustarte.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/extasis_detalle.jpg
      like this
      http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_zLpxGc7E_yI/TUN_1CdEOGI/AAAAAAAAA0o/Cyt5YBDaFSk/s320/beataludovica.jpg
      and like this
      http://perso.wanadoo.es/miguelcalleja2/21_BARROCO_2/tn_135%20BERNINI%20Extasis%20de%20Sta%20Teresa%20(Capilla%20Cornaro%201647-52)%2006.jpg
      🙂

  14. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    April 6, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    Carla and the robotic vehicle we’re not allowed to name exist as distinct entities in this universe? I think I’ll get a headache thinking about the ramifications of that.

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      April 6, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      I’d like to think she’s the voice actor.

    • Shrugs
      Shrugs
      April 6, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      I figure it’s like those Superman stories where Superman and Clark Kent become separate entities.

      • tinfoil theory
        tinfoil theory
        April 6, 2014 at 3:23 am | #

        I thought Lex Luthor was Superman‽

    • Blackbird
      Blackbird
      April 6, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

      Ultra Car is no canon in the Dumbingverse. The name ban should be over.

      • Blackbird
        Blackbird
        April 6, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

        *now

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          April 6, 2014 at 2:26 am | #

          Of COURSE Ultra Car is no cannon! She’s a CAR! =B

  15. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    April 6, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    I understand completely.

  16. Lokitsu
    Lokitsu
    April 6, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Dorothy just think of this as a prelude to having a sex talk with your daughter in 15-20 years.

    Yeah, its going to suck.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      April 6, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      Will it be as bad as this?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AS5toi7Xxxg

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

      I’m gonna teach my children all about sex from what i’ve learned on the internet.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        April 6, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

        They’re going to have a very vivid picture of it.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          April 6, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

          That’s because I’ll be showing them very vivid pictures.

    • isitsevenyet
      isitsevenyet
      April 6, 2014 at 8:09 am | #

      I… I think there’s a difference between explaining the facts (the mechanics, if you will) about where babies come from and all that, and trying to tell someone what the experience itself is like.

  17. ninja_jesus
    ninja_jesus
    April 6, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

    She’s as good at explaining things as the 11th Doctor. <_<

  18. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    April 6, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    Of course she would use a Dexter and Monkey Master analogy. Of course she would.

  19. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    April 6, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    Also, that episode of D & MM wasn’t even that good. If you had to compare one of them to sex, that’s not the one I would choose tbh.

    • MM
      MM
      April 6, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      Not that good? It was hilarious! Remember the scene where Ultra Car had control, and then Dexter called them into the war room to discuss the plan?

      • NerdHerder
        NerdHerder
        April 6, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

        I dunno. It sort of felt like the show jumped the shark with that episode. I mean, it was funny, but the show never quite reclaimed its brilliance afterwards.

        • MM
          MM
          April 6, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

          I don’t think you can blame the episode for that, though. The network kept going back and forth about whether or not they were going to renew, and by the time they made up their minds to go for another season, the writers had already wrapped up most of the ongoing storylines just in case.

      • caesaria82
        caesaria82
        April 6, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

        Hmmmm. To me it felt derivative and a bit forced. It did have hilarious moments, like the pie throwing incident. But overall, the episode I’d compare to sex would probably be the musical episode. Or the film noir hommage episode where Dexter is a private detective and of all the detective agencies in all the towns, Monkey Master walks into his. Classic.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          April 6, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

          Are you guys forgetting the PSA’s they used to have? They literally told people that about sex ed and being safe. Of course the networks had to ban it because of complaints from Lacrosse moms(soccer moms were busy boycotting something else).

        • NerdHerder
          NerdHerder
          April 6, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

          Oh, the musical episode would be spot-on. I mean, when Dexter and Ultra Car were “singing harmony”… everyone knows what they meant. I still can’t believe they got that past the censors.

        • Hoboturtle
          Hoboturtle
          April 6, 2014 at 1:06 am | #

          Psssh, have you seen Ultra Car? I can’t believe half of the episodes got pass the censors. Like that one episode when she got her rims stolen? Never have taking apart a car been so nightmare inducing.

  20. Kamino Neko
    Kamino Neko
    April 6, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

    Has been for a while. Cuts down on annoying cross-universal references.

  21. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    April 6, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

    Sex is like watching football. It seems really tedious and repetitive but people seem to really be into it! But guys think about them all the time while women tend to be more excited for the big game and then get dissapointed when their team doesn’t come through for them. It’s all about them climaxes!

    • arank11
      arank11
      April 6, 2014 at 12:44 am | #

      Sex is like the My Little Pony TV show. You may find it annoying, and even painful at first, but once you experience it a couple more times, it gets better. Eventually, you won’t be able to stop thinking about it. Of course, it’s not for everybody. There’s people who don’t like it at all and that’s perfectly fine. There’s people who take it way to far and turn it into something weird and horrifying. There’s also people who try to make you experience it against your will. It’s different for everybody

      • someguywithakatana
        someguywithakatana
        April 6, 2014 at 12:46 am | #

        Sex is like skydiving. I’ve never done it.

      • Marisa Mockery
        Marisa Mockery
        April 6, 2014 at 1:01 am | #

        Round of applause, people.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        April 6, 2014 at 2:27 am | #

        Sex is like ten minutes. Twenty if you’re really good.

  22. No Name
    No Name
    April 6, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

    Wait, the ban has been lifted! That means all those ~~~~~~~~~ jokes are finally going to be revealed!

    • Deathjavu
      Deathjavu
      April 6, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

      Ugh. Collectively, the least funny thing in the DOA comments since the the outright racists and sexists.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        April 6, 2014 at 9:12 am | #

        Shun the nonbeliever. Shuuuuuuuuunnn.

        Except for the part about racists and sexists, you’re probably right about that.

  23. arank11
    arank11
    April 6, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

    Why can’t we say it? It can’t be because Ultra Car doesn’t exist in this universe. We already know that she’s going to appear in only about a month. Granted, she’ll be named Carla, but still. AND we now know there’s an Ultra Car TV show! We should be allowed to say “Ultra Car” dangit! Who’s with me? Will you join me in the fight to be able to say the name of the most freaking awesome vehicle ever to live besides maybe the Batmobile? No name, no peace!!! Viva la Carvolution!!!

    • arank11
      arank11
      April 6, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

      Oh. Whoops. Looks like we can say it now

      • Bill
        Bill
        April 6, 2014 at 11:45 am | #

        I think you can say it as a hyphenated name or as two words.  It appears that saying it as one word is still verboten.

    • Deathjavu
      Deathjavu
      April 6, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

      It was originally because of a flood of unfunny in-jokes that were turning off new readers. The answer to your question was out there. I think it’s even in the FAQ, which apparently no one reads.

  24. C.W. Roden
    C.W. Roden
    April 6, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

    Weeeeeeeeell……its a little bit like that.

  25. CapedLuigisYoshi
    CapedLuigisYoshi
    April 6, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

    Well, I have sort of expected UC to be a fictional D&MM character for a few months now. Though the wording implies that UC’s from her own show, so I’ll just have to settle for a “close enough”.

  26. Pro_Ice
    Pro_Ice
    April 6, 2014 at 12:26 am | #

    I’ve put in yesterday’s comment section, but Yotomoe’s cool comic may warrant a repost, now in color: http://i.imgur.com/MnEJ1VN.jpg

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 6, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

      Hmmm…it’s ok…
      Maybe I’ll try my hand at lining and coloring this 😛

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 6, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

        Also Thanks for the inking and coloring!!!<3

        • Pro_Ice
          Pro_Ice
          April 6, 2014 at 12:46 am | #

          No problem. :] Rather thanks to you for the laugh.

  27. LiaHansen
    LiaHansen
    April 6, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

    Is it just me, or did something about Joyce’s design get somehow cuter in her latest appearance?

    • caesaria82
      caesaria82
      April 6, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

      I think it’s just the sideways profile that highlights her adorable nose.

    • derick
      derick
      April 6, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

      Hoodie dress is a +3 to adorable.

  28. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    April 6, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

    “Actually, you know what. A live demonstration is in order”

  29. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    April 6, 2014 at 12:41 am | #

    A) she phrased so it seemed sex, the act, was sinning.
    B) Sex is… Oddest conversations begin like this.

  30. Nono
    Nono
    April 6, 2014 at 1:51 am | #

    Is sex actually a sin, in Joyce’s religious group? I mean, I can get adultery, and possibly pre-marital hanky panky, but I don’t know if she thinks, ‘well, they’re married, have ALL the sex you want with each other!’.

    • TemplarKnight
      TemplarKnight
      April 6, 2014 at 2:14 am | #

      Her parents have 4 children. So no. And I don’t know of any Christian sects that believe sex in the confines of marriage as sin. However, there are individuals that see sex as only for procreation and any sex beyond that is considered sinful because you are still giving in to your lustful desires, regardless of being in a “safe zone.”

      Jesus actually said you should not have sex at all, but if you cannot restrain yourself, do it in the confines of marriage.

      The Knights Templar actually had it in their laws that even a married Templar could not touch a woman, even his wife.

      That’s all I’ve got on the matter.

      • tinfoil theory
        tinfoil theory
        April 6, 2014 at 3:17 am | #

        The symbol of the Templars was two men on one horse. Just saying.

        • MrMyerst
          MrMyerst
          April 6, 2014 at 4:32 am | #

          I’m pretty sure I read that erotica, somewhere….

      • isitsevenyet
        isitsevenyet
        April 6, 2014 at 8:11 am | #

        Actually I don’t think Jesus said that, IIRC it was Paul. Buuuut my memory is a bit fuzzy so you might be right.

        • isitsevenyet
          isitsevenyet
          April 6, 2014 at 8:13 am | #

          And from what I do remember, it doesn’t say you *shouldn’t* have sex at all, but for the purposes of spreading the Gospel, it’s better not to. I think the point was that it can be a distraction, that a single person has more freedom to work for the church than a married person does. It says it’s good to be married, but better not to be.

          • Jonathan S.
            Jonathan S.
            April 6, 2014 at 11:50 am | #

            What Paul said was that everyone should aspire to be like him – that is, free of any lust whatsoever – but if you couldn’t manage that, marriage was an acceptable second choice. “It is better to marry than to burn.”

      • Aris Katsaris
        Aris Katsaris
        April 6, 2014 at 10:03 am | #

        “Jesus actually said you should not have sex at all, but if you cannot restrain yourself, do it in the confines of marriage.”

        No, it was Paul that said that, not Jesus.

      • LeahRockshard
        LeahRockshard
        April 6, 2014 at 6:00 pm | #

        It was definitely Paul who said celibacy is best. He basically said, “Love for a spouse is distracting, so if you can manage it, be celibate like me and devote your life to God. But if you can’t keep it in your pants, get married.”

  31. indignostudios
    indignostudios
    April 6, 2014 at 3:13 am | #

    Sex is 10 to 20 minutes of physical labor followed by 12 seconds of ecstacy, followed by several days of guilt and shame.

  32. John
    John
    April 6, 2014 at 3:32 am | #

    Y’know, given the topic of conversation, and the way Joyce is leaning towards Dorothy, I’m amazed that no one has yelled, “Now kiss!” yet.

    • That Damn Rat
      That Damn Rat
      April 6, 2014 at 3:44 am | #

      Joe is right now, running to their location to say just that.

      • John
        John
        April 6, 2014 at 4:31 am | #

        Actually, Joe’s going to the same class they are, so maybe he’ll actually interrupt them with that in the next day or two.

      • Riku
        Riku
        April 6, 2014 at 1:33 pm | #

        Fuck that, Joyce responds to lust with violence

    • Glynvel
      Glynvel
      April 6, 2014 at 6:21 am | #

      Nooooooowwwww…….kiss!

  33. Emoroffle
    Emoroffle
    April 6, 2014 at 4:40 am | #

    Remember Joyce, curiosity killed the closed minded beliefs.

  34. RobHagen
    RobHagen
    April 6, 2014 at 11:38 am | #

    Cute Joyce is Cutely Learning about the Pre-Marital Hankies Pankies…

  35. Lel
    Lel
    April 6, 2014 at 11:38 am | #

    “I know that guys describe it as sticking your member in a warm apple pie… but how do we describe it? Being a pie with a dick in it?”

  36. nothri
    nothri
    April 6, 2014 at 12:03 pm | #

    Why are we whispering? Oh right, because it might get a little awkward as I publically explain sex to a naive college student by using a metaphor involving cartoons.

  37. jon
    jon
    April 6, 2014 at 1:46 pm | #

    “You know that thing that you won’t ever acknowledge doing at night sometimes, when you think everyone is asleep? No? Of course not. Well, it’s even better than that.”

    • John
      John
      April 6, 2014 at 6:15 pm | #

      It wouldn’t surprise me at all if Joyce actually doesn’t know.

      “You mean having frigged up dreams about Ethan rubbing a flashlight on my, my… tummy while you and Becky and my parents watch?”

  38. Megatron
    Megatron
    April 6, 2014 at 2:04 pm | #

    Once again the superiority of mechanical lifeforms is demonstrated by Ultra Car getting an appearance before her flelshling counterpart, Carla.

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!

  39. SilverArrowArtemis
    SilverArrowArtemis
    April 6, 2014 at 2:46 pm | #

    Sorry, Dorothy. Maybe SpongeBob can explain it better using .

    • SilverArrowArtemis
      SilverArrowArtemis
      April 6, 2014 at 2:47 pm | #

      the sex song!

    • 3oranges
      3oranges
      April 6, 2014 at 4:52 pm | #

      Using . sounds like it is better suited to explaining periods.
      I’ll show myself out.

  40. C.
    C.
    April 6, 2014 at 7:49 pm | #

    Ultra Car Ultra Car Ultra Car! We can say her name now!

  41. LPA
    LPA
    April 7, 2014 at 1:19 am | #

    I really appreciate how often this comic is updated

  42. Maki P
    Maki P
    April 11, 2014 at 5:36 pm | #

    ULTRACAR CROSSOVER!!!???? What have I been missing?

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Joshua J. Friedman @joshuajfriedman.com ⋅ 2d
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
The problems with this prosecution are legion, but most immediately, the
government cannot prosecute Judge Dugan because she is entitled to judicial immunity for her official acts. Immunity is not a defense to the prosecution to be determined later by a jury or court; it is an absolute bar to the prosecution at the outset. See Trump v. United States,
603 U.S. 593, 630 (2024).
joshgerstein.bsky.social's user avatarJosh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
storage.courtlistener.com

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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Up, continued" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomic #webcomics
www.dumbingofage.com
Up, continued
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The Onion @theonion.com ⋅ 2d
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore. theonion.com/you-can...
header image - You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
theonion.com
You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
I’ve loved movies ever since I was a little kid. Just stepping into that dark theater, with the smell of fresh popcorn, was like being transported to a whole other world. It used to be so magical. But now I’m thinking about boycotting movies altogether. Why? Because I can’t seem to watch one anymore without […]
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
GOTTEM
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geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
the 90s were a wild time. if i told you how many magazines there were you wouldnt even believe me
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Aubrey Gilleran @aubreygilleran.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908. "You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
atrupar.com's user avatarAaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
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Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social ⋅ 11d
1984 calendar meme reading 1529, the year of the first Ottoman siege of Vienna
spavel.bsky.social's user avatarPavel🐀 @spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 11d
Who can forget the Swiss-Austrian Union, or its famous capital - Istanbul.
AI generated ad by a company called Travello showing the 10 most visited cities in Europe, except the cities are hilariously poorly placed. London is in Wales, Paris is in Ireland, Rome is in France, Rom (yes like Rome but without an E) is in Spain, Barcelona is in Morocco, Prague is in Germany, Vienna is in Italy, Istanbul is in Austria, Milan is in Libya, and Antalya is correctly shown as in Turkey but is in the wrong place. Also a few of the borders like Switzerland and Austria or Hungary and Slovenia are missing.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
*at the very end of Andor, cassian travels through a vortex that makes everyone look a decade younger*
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
(May 14, 2026)
a bemused lucy watches as somebody collapses on her dorm room floor
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Dumbing of Age: "Up" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic #dofa
www.dumbingofage.com
Up
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