Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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yeah dorothy's gonna pluck that sucker
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June 8, 2026

Rumpy-pumpy

by David M Willis on April 20, 2014 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - I Was a Teenage Churchmouse

└ Tags: chastity churchmouse, dorothy, hymmel the humming hymnal, joe, joyce, walky

Discussion (181) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Khaner
    Khaner
    April 20, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    Your hair, Walky? Say goodbye. Along with your sanity.

    • Tunaro
      Tunaro
      April 20, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      So you’re saying the sex would be…

      ( •_•)
      ( •_•)>⌐□-□
      (⌐□_□)

      …Mindblowing?

      • John
        John
        April 20, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

        That’s not what’ll be getting blown.

      • Carlos
        Carlos
        April 20, 2014 at 1:07 am | #

        YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CSI Miami

        • Maveric1984
          Maveric1984
          April 20, 2014 at 9:17 am | #

          You mean this?

          • ocbrad1
            ocbrad1
            April 20, 2014 at 4:38 pm | #

            That is awesome!

      • Fred
        Fred
        April 20, 2014 at 9:24 am | #

        WHY CAN’T WE UPVOTE COMMENTS HERE
        Also happy Easter

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      April 20, 2014 at 12:54 am | #

      I really want Rumpy-Pumpy to be another “children’s” show…

      • Dante
        Dante
        April 20, 2014 at 3:53 am | #

        I have never agreed with a comment more.

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          April 20, 2014 at 3:57 am | #

          I feel like I need to compose another song =>

          • John
            John
            April 20, 2014 at 5:48 am | #

            Please don’t summon this one from the nightmarish depths of the common human subconsciousness, or whatever the hell you did yesterday to call forth the exact song I was hearing in my inner ear.

            • Charles
              Charles
              April 20, 2014 at 6:20 am | #

              Too late.

            • Jen Aside
              Jen Aside
              April 21, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

              You know all children’s songs are Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, don’t you =B

              • Jen Aside
                Jen Aside
                April 21, 2014 at 1:27 am | #

                (not like anyone reads comments after a new one’s out, but I *did* come up with a Dexter & Monkey Master theme song… I think it’s a rip-off of one of those inane celebrity gossip shows my mother watches, tho)

      • Mr. Morningstar
        Mr. Morningstar
        April 20, 2014 at 4:30 pm | #

        Is Rumpy Pumpy going to be the new way of saying Hanky Panky now?

        Are we going to say “premarital rumpy pumpy” insteaod of “premarital hanky panky”?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          April 20, 2014 at 11:40 pm | #

          As far as I was aware, rumpy-pumpy was slang for anal sex and/or having sex with a plump person.

        • PedanticJerkass
          PedanticJerkass
          April 20, 2014 at 11:56 pm | #

          If by new, you mean “at least since 2003, according to Urban Dictionary, and probably a whole lot longer than that”, then sure.

          • Mr. Morningstar
            Mr. Morningstar
            April 22, 2014 at 5:50 pm | #

            huh. really?

            First I heard it.

  2. ZombieAteMyBrains
    ZombieAteMyBrains
    April 20, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Congrats Walky, you’re moving up in the world.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 20, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      Walky is ALWAYS moving up in the world. He could take a 40 year nap and become Emperor of the planet Earth.

      • John
        John
        April 20, 2014 at 8:39 pm | #

        He could get killed and he’d just rise from the dead as the saviour of the world.

        • Andrusi
          Andrusi
          April 21, 2014 at 8:57 am | #

          But then Robin, Mike, and a bunch of new people would steal the spotlight.

    • das-g
      das-g
      April 20, 2014 at 7:38 am | #

      He’ll get used to it.

  3. Tunaro
    Tunaro
    April 20, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Joe can make ANYTHING lead to people doing it. Witness his powers.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 20, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      With great power comes great responsibility.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        April 20, 2014 at 11:41 pm | #

        With responsibility = birth control.

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 20, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

      Like being the Scarlet Witch of Rule 34?

      • Zeraphim
        Zeraphim
        April 20, 2014 at 3:50 am | #

        “No more rumpy-pumpy”

        • JustCheetoDust
          JustCheetoDust
          April 20, 2014 at 5:34 am | #

          Maybe not the House of M part.

    • Unkind fish
      Unkind fish
      April 20, 2014 at 2:50 am | #

      All hail the mighty joe of getting others laid!

  4. Bill
    Bill
    April 20, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    I think that this is the first time I’ve seen Dorothy looking flustered.

    • Lu86
      Lu86
      April 20, 2014 at 2:01 am | #

      …Sure, let’s go with “flustered”

      • indignostudios
        indignostudios
        April 20, 2014 at 2:20 am | #

        I would rather go with “horny.”

  5. someguywithakatana
    someguywithakatana
    April 20, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    There are so many things about that final panel that make me uncomfortable

    • Leonou
      Leonou
      April 20, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      Everything about that final panel makes me smile.
      Everything !

    • wesmaster160
      wesmaster160
      April 20, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      And yet so many things that make me very comfortable.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 20, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

        You mean like “pants are coming off” comfortable?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 20, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      And all of them are Joe’s face.

      • Vim-Hogar
        Vim-Hogar
        April 20, 2014 at 1:52 am | #

        oh god, how did I miss that

        • indignostudios
          indignostudios
          April 20, 2014 at 2:21 am | #

          He’s willing it to happen while also reaping the egotistical spoils of it working.

    • Unkind fish
      Unkind fish
      April 20, 2014 at 2:52 am | #

      I agree with the human. This is an awkward panel for Dorothy.

  6. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    April 20, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Chastity Churchmouse sez: Lock that sucker up until you’re married!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 20, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse sez: If you touch below the belt you’ll go to hell and melt.

    • Viktoria
      Viktoria
      April 20, 2014 at 12:57 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse sez: Repress your feelings, that’s the way, to help your soul stay a-okay.

    • indignostudios
      indignostudios
      April 20, 2014 at 2:21 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse Sez: If your boyfriend is gay, then show him the way!

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      April 20, 2014 at 3:58 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse sez: “Jesus wouldn’t bone; leave the girl alone!”

    • John
      John
      April 20, 2014 at 5:33 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse sez: “Your dad owns your vagina until you’re 23!“, apparently.

      I hadn’t realized there was an age limit on it. I thought your dad just handed the keys off to your husband at the wedding.

      • Maveric1984
        Maveric1984
        April 20, 2014 at 9:13 am | #

        I’m 30 and my fiancée is 28, and we’ve been going at it like rabbits for two years. I couldn’t tell you if the 23 thing is true or not.

        Granted, I was 22 when I lost my virginity…

      • Bill
        Bill
        April 20, 2014 at 11:30 am | #

        Just like Dad handing over the keys to the car.

        “…and don’t spill anything on the upholstery!”

        • Maveric1984
          Maveric1984
          April 20, 2014 at 12:34 pm | #

          I always preferred leather to uhpolstry.

        • John
          John
          April 20, 2014 at 8:27 pm | #

          Yeah, that’s the sin of Onan.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        April 20, 2014 at 11:44 pm | #

        It’s a pity you can’t let your dad deal with the messier aspects of vagina ownership until then.

    • Maveric1984
      Maveric1984
      April 20, 2014 at 9:10 am | #

      Chastity Churchmouse sea: Penises shoot poison from the tip, and the only antidote is a wedding ring!

      There’s a lot of rule 34 out there based on this quote and “sucking out the poison”.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 20, 2014 at 3:22 pm | #

        Chastity Churchmouse ripped off Zardoz!

      • Potatamoto
        Potatamoto
        April 20, 2014 at 10:52 pm | #

        If you know where to find it, Chastity Churchmouse actually beats out Gadget Hackwrench for anthropomorphic mouse R34. FACT.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          April 20, 2014 at 11:48 pm | #

          I wasn’t able to find CC R34, which is kinda disappointing.

  7. madock345
    madock345
    April 20, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Joyce’s Puppy-dog eyes in panel 2 are some of the most adorable I’ve ever seen.

  8. newllend
    newllend
    April 20, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    I’m thinking Joyce is a bit jealous.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      April 20, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

      I doubt it; that face says “judgmental”.

      • Jackson
        Jackson
        April 20, 2014 at 12:57 am | #

        Don’t see why it can’t be both!

        • Sam
          Sam
          April 20, 2014 at 1:30 am | #

          Judgemelous? Jealoumental?

          • indignostudios
            indignostudios
            April 20, 2014 at 2:22 am | #

            Jello-Mental.

            • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              April 20, 2014 at 3:25 pm | #

              Totes Jelly.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              April 20, 2014 at 11:49 pm | #

              Jello-menno?

        • Charles
          Charles
          April 20, 2014 at 6:26 am | #

          Hello, Jackson. Welcome to the face you gave me ALL THROUGH COLLEGE.

          Not that I complain, you were a remarkably chill dude about the premarital hanking and panking. Even about both at once!

          Still, the face did happen. A lot.

          • Jackson
            Jackson
            April 20, 2014 at 9:29 am | #

            It was my judgmealous face.

            Faaaaace.

  9. JessTheBest
    JessTheBest
    April 20, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Two weeks later, Walky has the hairiest chest on campus, becomes bigfoot except sexy.

    • madock345
      madock345
      April 20, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      Wait… You mean you Don’t find Bigfoot sexy?

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 20, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

        Have you even seen his hair? That’s all natural, baby!

        • John
          John
          April 20, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

          o/` I am in love
          But it’s only a fantasy
          I’m in search of
          That hairy creature who cared for me
          Under the pines

          Close my eyes and I see you there
          Musky smell of your matted hair
          Our minds were one
          But only for a moment… o/`

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          April 20, 2014 at 2:51 am | #

          I pushed you away, Yeti
          But you begged for it
          I wish we could stay, Yeti
          Here in our love forest

          http://youtu.be/VxQwtl_giK4

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        April 20, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

        Something, something, crass joke about big feet…

        • Bill
          Bill
          April 20, 2014 at 11:32 am | #

          You know what they say about men with big feet?

          They have to buy larger shoes.

          • Mr. Morningstar
            Mr. Morningstar
            April 20, 2014 at 4:27 pm | #

            In general it’s a huge hassle and you have to deal with people mocking your shoe size and making jokes about your penis.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        April 20, 2014 at 11:51 pm | #

        When it comes to sex appeal, Cousin It has it over Big Foot.

  10. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    April 20, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    NO JOYCE. DON’T YOU KNOW ALL THE RULE 34 OF HER?

    • newllend
      newllend
      April 20, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      I stay away from there, things get WAY to freaky in the that site.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 20, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

        You’re missing out on cringe-inducing ways to find out that celebrities have died. Specifically Bea Arthur, Margaret Thatcher, Fred Phelps, and the Ultimate Warrior.

        • newllend
          newllend
          April 20, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

          THE ULTIMATE WARRIORS DEAD!? *creis*

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            April 20, 2014 at 1:00 am | #

            Yeah, two weeks ago.

        • Mr. Morningstar
          Mr. Morningstar
          April 20, 2014 at 4:28 pm | #

          I… Actually DID see a rule 34 involving both Jesus and Fred Phelps.

          It was… Interesting to say the least.

  11. LionHeart
    LionHeart
    April 20, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    …Huh. SO I guess Walky’s Walkerton is pure crack cocaine. Who knew?

  12. Scott
    Scott
    April 20, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

    I wonder if all of America’s presidents are secretly celibate.

    I mean, let’s be honest here, we all see where this is going long-term.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      April 20, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

      According to Cracked, all of America’s presidents are secretly horndogs. Also, insane.

      The problem with this is, they have research on their side.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 20, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

        Wasn’t it an SNL sketch that suggested that Lyndon B. Johnson had the secret nickname “El BJ?”

        • Rabid Rabbit
          Rabid Rabbit
          April 20, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

          Giving or taking? Just curious.

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            April 20, 2014 at 5:36 am | #

            Taking. Something about Mexican prostitutes.

  13. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    April 20, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

    Come on Dorothy, let Joyce share with you. It’s important to her, it’ll help you understand her better and it’ll make her happy.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      April 20, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

      I don’t know how to say this without sounding like a jerk, but: Dorothy probably already understands why Joyce is the way she is. She’s been closed off and indoctrinated close (but not quite) to the point of brainwashing. It’s not terribly complicated, and she doesn’t need to see the specific tools of indoctrination.

      It’s the sane and well-adjusted ones that are harder to understand.

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        April 20, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

        The more information they have the better they understand her thought processes. time after time people make assumptions about Joyce and time after time they’re proven wrong. It’s not as simple as just calling it brainwashing.

        • Sam
          Sam
          April 20, 2014 at 1:39 am | #

          True, but in this case, Dorothy’s assessments of Joyce are probably fairly accurate.
          Joyce isn’t a simple person to get, and she’s obviously not a malicious one, but these bizarre-sounding fundie cartoons aren’t gonna teach Dorothy anything about Joyce or her upbring she hasn’t already estimated herself.

          • V Missirian
            V Missirian
            April 20, 2014 at 2:35 pm | #

            Maybe the cartoons won’t. But maybe their discussions about them would?

      • Jerden
        Jerden
        April 20, 2014 at 3:22 pm | #

        Yeah, sane and well adjusted people are annoying? What’s their problem! We don’t have a label for it! Crazy people, now they have a nice reason for their problems. They make more sense.

  14. begbert2
    begbert2
    April 20, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

    So Dorothy’s going to blow off studying for sex? I wonder if she’ll realize what she’s doing before or after her first B.

    • metaceryn
      metaceryn
      April 20, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

      Getting the D seems to be more important then getting A’s now.

      • MO
        MO
        April 20, 2014 at 12:39 am | #

        Oh DUH, beg was talking about grades! I thought for a second that the B stood for “Baby”.

      • newllend
        newllend
        April 20, 2014 at 1:03 am | #

        Oh wait dude I already used that joke.

        • Metaceryn
          Metaceryn
          April 20, 2014 at 3:39 am | #

          And here I thought I was being original. 🙁

      • Lu86
        Lu86
        April 20, 2014 at 1:43 am | #

        What’s the deal with the appropiate avatars for comments like this!?

    • newllend
      newllend
      April 20, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

      She’ll just panic and do the first most unreasonable thing that pops up in her head, which would probably be my calculations….dump Walky.

  15. newllend
    newllend
    April 20, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

    WAIT A MINUTE! Is this going to end in that 3some we were talking about? Pleas tell me it will.

    • das-g
      das-g
      April 20, 2014 at 7:54 am | #

      “It will!”

      There. Satisfied? Then I’ll go back to telling what I actually know or can guess. 😛

  16. Pyr05
    Pyr05
    April 20, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

    So she’s going to watch?!?

  17. Syclamoth
    Syclamoth
    April 20, 2014 at 12:41 am | #

    Ah yes, I was wondering what Joe was doing in this scene.

  18. mistrali
    mistrali
    April 20, 2014 at 12:46 am | #

    …Seriously? Can’t Dorothy just watch the fricking thing? Mind you, it might lead to lectures on… well, now, on chastity. But Joyce has been changing HER worldview and being open-minded. why can’t Dorothy give a little?

    • Deathjavu
      Deathjavu
      April 20, 2014 at 12:59 am | #

      Well, based on the song Joyce sang last time it’s probably really really creepy. Being openminded doesn’t mean giving credence to hurtful views…this is a common mistake on the internet.

      • newllend
        newllend
        April 20, 2014 at 1:06 am | #

        LIKE ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      April 20, 2014 at 1:01 am | #

      Yeah, why can’t she, like, go to church with her or something.

      • Sam
        Sam
        April 20, 2014 at 1:42 am | #

        That, and those cartoons just sound super weird, too.

        • Shogouki
          Shogouki
          April 20, 2014 at 2:53 am | #

          More like fatally cringe-inducing. Seriously just hearing the names makes me cringe.

      • Jim Johnson
        Jim Johnson
        April 20, 2014 at 2:31 am | #

        Roughly how long has it been in-universe since Dorothy went to Church with Joyce anyway? One week, two?

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          April 20, 2014 at 2:36 am | #

          Roughly how long has it been in-universe since Dorothy asked Joyce to do some atheism-based activity?

          Never?

          Well, okay then.

          • Jerden
            Jerden
            April 20, 2014 at 3:24 pm | #

            Well, you know what atheism like, just being near Dorothy could probably be considered a godless activity. Depending on how strict we are.

            • Riku
              Riku
              April 20, 2014 at 5:52 pm | #

              It seriously can actually. My parents wanted me to stop hanging out with a certain friend when I was 12 because he was an atheist (they couldn’t really stop me though because we were at school anyway). Looked it up in the quaran later: yep, forbidden

            • 3oranges
              3oranges
              April 20, 2014 at 7:27 pm | #

              And Joyce’s parents seem to have taken it that way, but Joyce argued the opposite; for her being nice with people like Dorothy is part of being a strict Christian.

        • John
          John
          April 20, 2014 at 3:04 am | #

          Today is Monday of Week Four. Dorothy went to church with Joyce on Sunday of Week Two. So two weeks and a day.

    • 3oranges
      3oranges
      April 20, 2014 at 2:12 am | #

      Remember how their relationship is based on mutual respect and giving space to their beliefs? Joyce said she wouldn’t bring the Chick tracts if Dorothy didn’t bring the biology books, and neither has been lecturing the other about how to live their life since?

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        April 20, 2014 at 4:00 am | #

        I found one of those Chick Tracts at the Mall. Unfortunately not one of the more hilarious ones, just wishfully-hoping-to-convert-through-being-obnoxiously-judgemental.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          April 21, 2014 at 3:42 pm | #

          My friends and I used to laugh and rip on them when we found them, just in case whoever left them was lingering in the area, hoping to witness a tearful conversion or something. I actually had a pretty complete collection of them at one time.

    • showler
      showler
      April 20, 2014 at 9:40 am | #

      It’s entirely possible she did have other plans. Until Joe put some thoughts in her mind.

  19. rhy
    rhy
    April 20, 2014 at 12:50 am | #

    Fourth panel Joe: Aw ys

  20. Jeremy
    Jeremy
    April 20, 2014 at 12:51 am | #

    …Chastity Churchmouse?

    • IncadescentFlame
      IncadescentFlame
      April 20, 2014 at 2:18 am | #

      Search “Charity Churchmouse.”

      I apologize beforehand.

      • Jeremy
        Jeremy
        April 20, 2014 at 9:27 am | #

        I have no words for what I just saw…

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      April 21, 2014 at 3:44 pm | #

      I love how quickly the backstory is filled in.

  21. XMinusOne
    XMinusOne
    April 20, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

    Oh I can see Joyce and Walky doing the rumpy-pumpy to the rhythm of the ‘Etch-A-Sketch’ song …

    (singing) “… you’ve taken it …” Boomp! Boomp!

    “… and you’re shakin’ it …” Boomp! Boomp!

    ” … and we’re makin’ it … ” Boomp! Boomp!

    (from outside the door) “Those aren’t the lyrics.”

    (together) “Go home, Joyce!”

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      April 20, 2014 at 3:12 am | #

      Soooo… is Dorothy or Walky shouting “Boomp! Boomp!” during sex?

    • Bill
      Bill
      April 20, 2014 at 11:41 am | #

      I think the accepted word in the Willis-world is “thumpasprung”.

  22. Rabid Rabbit
    Rabid Rabbit
    April 20, 2014 at 1:13 am | #

    Joe’s finest moment. No, truly.

    I am reminded of the time when, out in a bar with a very Joyce-like person (except far less adorable, and rather more disturbing — don’t worry, she stuck to water) a friend deliberately brought out the subject of abortion. Four pro-choicers against one Joyce. Not a fair fight. And then when not-Joyce tried to stop the conversation by stating that it was making her uncomfortable, the guy who started it responded “Good. People should be made uncomfortable with their worldview from time to time.”

    It was not long after this that I had to excuse myself to get to the bathroom. So that I could burst out laughing. Couldn’t do that publicly, it would have spoiled things.

    To be fair, the guy who started this was quite drunk.

  23. Carlos
    Carlos
    April 20, 2014 at 1:15 am | #

    So… is the lesson here that you can’t be successful if you’re having sex? After all, Dorothy goes at it with Walky ONE TIME and now she’s like, addicted. NO WAIT! The lesson is obviously that religious things taken out of context can be very…… rule inducing. If you catch my drift.

  24. Jimmy
    Jimmy
    April 20, 2014 at 1:20 am | #

    Joe’s face in the last panel: Priceless.

  25. Dr. Zeus
    Dr. Zeus
    April 20, 2014 at 1:28 am | #

    Trust me Walky. Chest hair has NOTHING to do with amount of sex.

  26. SilverArrowArtemis
    SilverArrowArtemis
    April 20, 2014 at 2:15 am | #

    Joyce, STAHP!

  27. indignostudios
    indignostudios
    April 20, 2014 at 2:19 am | #

    This will end with a threesome.

    • Jerden
      Jerden
      April 20, 2014 at 3:26 pm | #

      Which three of them though?
      Why not throw in everyone in this strip, round it up to a foursome?

      • Riku
        Riku
        April 20, 2014 at 5:48 pm | #

        Joyce/Walky/Joe

        Dorothy’s busy studying

    • Sam
      Sam
      April 20, 2014 at 5:01 pm | #

      But not between who you think!

  28. IncadescentFlame
    IncadescentFlame
    April 20, 2014 at 2:20 am | #

    Hymmel the Hymnal doesn’t hold a candle to “Digging for Dinosaurs.”

    Dinosaurs are much better than songbooks.

    • IncadescentFlame
      IncadescentFlame
      April 20, 2014 at 2:22 am | #

      I feel that I should clarify:
      I meant the old sing-a-long style movie. Not the DS game that I’ve never heard of.

      • indignostudios
        indignostudios
        April 20, 2014 at 2:24 am | #

        There’s also the crossover episode where Hymmel time trvels and finds out that a dinosaur was the 13th apostle.

    • Amazi-Stool
      Amazi-Stool
      April 20, 2014 at 12:00 pm | #

      Appropriate gravatar is appropriate!

  29. JoeMerl
    JoeMerl
    April 20, 2014 at 2:51 am | #

    Hymmel/Chastity is my OTP.

  30. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    April 20, 2014 at 2:56 am | #

    I see no reason Dorothy need subject herself to the 22 min. long brain washing tape…she knows what Joyce is about.

    They’ve talked often about it, and seem to have a sort of mutual respect for each other. Although Joyce does push the envelope … like now, pushing your views off on someone who clearly has other things on her mind.

    Anyway, Mr. Willis, just why should Dorothy go to church with Joyce? If she has never been to one then perhaps yes, just to make her happy. In which case Joyce should reciprocate and spend Sunday with Dorothy at the beach or something, and not mention church once. Fair is fair.

    PS I was lucky. My mother took my brother and me to several different churches while we were growing up, so we could know about them. My dad took us to Catholic Church for the same reason.
    I’ve read the Bible, Book of Mormon and a couple of others. All of them pretty much say the same thing, just enforce it differently. Except the Quoran (spelling I apologize) which has their own set of rules that do differ from most of the others in some respects). Still, most tell us to be the best we can be, more or less. Don’t steal, don’t kill, that sort of thing.

    My brother and I went to a Pentacostal Church a few Sundays, with a neighbor, for the same reason, to learn. I refused to go back when told that we needed to bring in all of our comic books the next Sunday, for the bonfire. I listened to the Hellfire and brimstone and the don’t do’s and considered them. But, book burning. No way. I told the preacher I wouldn’t be back and why. I was 12. Learning to think for yourself should start young or it’s not worth anything. And a school or church that forgets that, shouldn’t be attended.

    There comes a time when being politically correct amounts to bullshit. And that is when it is time to say what you really think.

    I think a church or religion that turns out people with a world view as warped as Joyces is, is not right.

    • fudo81
      fudo81
      April 20, 2014 at 3:15 am | #

      uh, she’s already been there…

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      April 20, 2014 at 3:26 am | #

      ….why are you asking me that question, I don’t understand what that is in response to, since it seems to be countering something I’ve never said.

      • Hoovy_Woopeans
        Hoovy_Woopeans
        April 20, 2014 at 3:42 am | #

        lol these comments just get more and more hilarious with every time joyce talks about her beliefs

      • Riku
        Riku
        April 20, 2014 at 5:28 pm | #

        Clearly since Joyce is one of your characters these are YOUR views. You’re a conservative, liberal, atheist, jew, christian, slut shaming, womanizing, women’s rights pushing, transgender men’s rights activist.

    • Amazi-Stool
      Amazi-Stool
      April 20, 2014 at 12:15 pm | #

      “Anyway, Mr. Willis, just why should Dorothy go to church with Joyce? If she has never been to one then perhaps yes, just to make her happy. In which case Joyce should reciprocate and spend Sunday with Dorothy at the beach or something, and not mention church once.”

      So you are proposing what already happened (but with slightly different details)?

      This is the moment where the beach-storyline starts.
      The moment where Joyce asks Dorothy to go to church with her also was part of the beach-storyline.

    • Jerden
      Jerden
      April 20, 2014 at 3:29 pm | #

      “I see no reason Dorothy need subject herself to the 22 min. long brain washing tape…she knows what Joyce is about. ”

      For BRAIN WASHING! You answered your own question!
      Also, the songs are kinda catchy.

      Remember to maintain mental hygene. Regular brain washing keeps the mind clean.

    • Jen
      Jen
      April 21, 2014 at 11:38 am | #

      Idon’tcarenomore, actually, I think an equivalent activity would be Joyce reading Richard Dawkins or something like that, not just going and hanging out at a beach.

  31. mathiasmindblade
    mathiasmindblade
    April 20, 2014 at 3:58 am | #

    Despite being ceilibate, Joyce has been shown to want something abstractly sexual in defiance of her parents. I believe it involved rubbing a drumstick or some other phallic object on over her belly in a dream? Someone please post the link to that page.

    • John
      John
      April 20, 2014 at 5:29 am | #

      Joyce’s messed-up dream begins here.

      • mathiasmindblade
        mathiasmindblade
        April 20, 2014 at 8:01 am | #

        *Gives John a thousand and twenty two point 3 ceramic hamburgers* Here. A gift for your help!

  32. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    April 20, 2014 at 4:50 am | #

    Don’t forget mouse traps and candle wax.

  33. ATN
    ATN
    April 20, 2014 at 7:27 am | #

    My left eye popped out of it’s socket again, Willis. Damn you.

  34. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    April 20, 2014 at 10:06 am | #

    She should bring over some Superkids and their war against N.M.E. So far, the only children’s Christian cyberpunk series I’ve seen.

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      April 20, 2014 at 10:07 am | #

      But no, seriously, there’s no need to believe Christian television is inherently inferior to regular television.

      Even if it often is. I speak as a Christian. Look at Narnia.

      • V Missirian
        V Missirian
        April 20, 2014 at 2:59 pm | #

        I agree! Many themes valued by religion can be accessible to most people, especially when separated from the specifics of religious belief.

      • Jerden
        Jerden
        April 20, 2014 at 3:30 pm | #

        Nope. I’ve seen both, and I think they’re probably equally inane and pointless, with the rare gem worth seeing.

    • wakeangel2001
      wakeangel2001
      April 20, 2014 at 12:27 pm | #

      wait…N.M.E…? That’s the name of the organization the created the monsters in the Kirby Cartoon! Of course it’s such a basic fake acronym name I suppose it could be genuine coincidence they both use it.

      • Charles Phipps
        Charles Phipps
        April 20, 2014 at 2:15 pm | #

        You want me to blow your mind? You know what’s also covert Christian cartoons? The Care Bears? A bunch of divine animal beings living in Heaven doing “Touched by an Angel” missions and who occasionally fight Satan. Magic is even a force for the Devil.

        Just like the Smurfs are communist propaganda.

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          April 20, 2014 at 4:08 pm | #

          I couldn’t watch Care Bears because they fought and defeated Satan without the help of Jesus Christ.

          • Charles Phipps
            Charles Phipps
            April 20, 2014 at 7:45 pm | #

            My apologies, Willis, I mean that. It’s especially appalling given Tenderheart was Jesus.

            Yes, Jesus was a bear.

            Ask C.S. Lewis, he made it work.

  35. wakeangel2001
    wakeangel2001
    April 20, 2014 at 12:25 pm | #

    I looked up what a Hymnal is, is this cartoon about an anthropomorphic book? The only other media I can think of with anthropomorphic books as protagonists is the Pagemaster…

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      April 20, 2014 at 1:15 pm | #

      http://itswalky.tumblr.com/post/83314295704/you-might-know-this-song-better-as-im-a-slave-4

      • Jerden
        Jerden
        April 20, 2014 at 3:36 pm | #

        I actually quite liked the song. But the mouse was creepy. Too creepy.
        Actually, I think that enhanced the music video for me. God loves everyone, ever really messed up anthromorphic animals! Completely irrelevant to the actual song, but always worth remembering.

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          April 20, 2014 at 4:06 pm | #

          It is a pretty fantastic song, subject matter aside.

      • showler
        showler
        April 20, 2014 at 5:09 pm | #

        If God’s calling for you is to dress up as a sparkly blue velour book, you might want to consider some of the alternative gods that are available.

        • Charles Phipps
          Charles Phipps
          April 21, 2014 at 12:45 pm | #

          The sparkly blue book outfit is better than some of the stuff Kratos’ gods got him up to.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          April 21, 2014 at 3:49 pm | #

          That poor bastard, I hope he was paid enough to compensate for the PTSD he now suffers from. Wonder how long he spent in makeup getting ready.

      • Jason
        Jason
        April 20, 2014 at 11:01 pm | #

        Holy shit, it’s a real thing.

      • PedanticJerkass
        PedanticJerkass
        April 21, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

        That monster’s gonna give me nightmares.

  36. SilverArrowArtemis
    SilverArrowArtemis
    April 20, 2014 at 3:18 pm | #

    Joyce: I won’t judge. *silently judging*

  37. Mr. Morningstar
    Mr. Morningstar
    April 20, 2014 at 4:25 pm | #

    The look on Joes face in the last panel is like

    “My work here is done.”

  38. FuryOfFirestorm
    FuryOfFirestorm
    April 20, 2014 at 7:15 pm | #

    Time for “Walky Performs A Sex 2: Erection Boogaloo”!

  39. The_Master
    The_Master
    April 20, 2014 at 10:17 pm | #

    If the number of chest hairs I had were proportional to the number of times I had sex, (write your own ending about lots of hair, no hair, weird dinosaur feathers/lizard scales…)

    • StClair
      StClair
      April 21, 2014 at 3:05 pm | #

      Cartoon bunnies have numbers.

  40. Eukie
    Eukie
    April 21, 2014 at 4:39 am | #

    Even my cold, stony black atheist heart cannot help but feel sorry for Joyce in panel 3. She looks like she so desperately wants to be able to enjoy watching (her favourite) cartoons with her best friend…

    …unaware of the fact that Dorothy would most likely feel disgusted by them, with only her diplomatic tact keeping her from doing a Roz.

  41. Roborat
    Roborat
    April 21, 2014 at 3:50 pm | #

    What! That’s how you get chest hairs? Crap, I have been doing it wrong all these years.

  42. nothri
    nothri
    September 9, 2014 at 2:18 am | #

    The Rumpy-Pumpy? Sounds like a nursery rhyme.

  43. Torechwen
    Torechwen
    March 17, 2015 at 2:26 pm | #

    I think this is the first webcomic I’ve seen reference Psalty. :p

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