Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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gonna start needing photo ref for forest quad too, huh
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May 12, 2026

Underwear

by David M Willis on September 7, 2017 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Face the Strange
└ Tags: jennifer, lucy, malaya, sal

Discussion (225) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    September 7, 2017 at 12:01 am | #

    SUCH UNSPEAKABLE HORRORS NARROWLY ESCAPED

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      September 7, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

      also the up-arrow-down box

      and was that her first day, I know that feel

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      September 7, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

      Yeah, one minute you’re rooming with Lucy, the next minute you’re stalking her through an old man’s wardrobe and end up brainwashed by an evil ice queen.

      That was the plot to Frozen, correct?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        September 7, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

        Considering how many times I heard “Let it Go” that year, it’s possible we were all brainwashed by an evil ice queen.

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        September 7, 2017 at 12:28 am | #

        …Been Waitin’ On The Buss All Da~ay…

        • jeffepp
          jeffepp
          September 7, 2017 at 1:20 am | #

          I’d be lion if I said I didn’t get that.

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          September 7, 2017 at 1:57 am | #

          Got your brown paper bag and your take-home pay?

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        September 7, 2017 at 12:51 am | #

        Evil ice queen? No, she was a dem fine gel! –Uncle Andrew

        • King Daniel
          King Daniel
          September 7, 2017 at 1:05 am | #

          Uncle Andrew? Isn’t that the Spider-Man character? You know, Clark Kent’s uncle?

          • Marsh Maryrose
            Marsh Maryrose
            September 7, 2017 at 1:22 am | #

            Uncle Andrew was the subject of a song by Paul McCartney. He was better known by his stage name, Admiral Halcyon.

    • Wolfbeckett
      Wolfbeckett
      September 7, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

      The price of preparedness: measured now in gold, later in blood.

    • Shade
      Shade
      September 7, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

      Yeah, she’s probably one of those morning people too.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      September 7, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

      Appropriate avatar is appropriate.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      September 7, 2017 at 3:13 am | #

      It does occur to me that living with Lucy is quite possibly a fate sort of like being buried alive in processes sugar.

  2. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    September 7, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    I kind of hope that we never see Lucy again after this, just for the sake of the joke

    • Sporky
      Sporky
      September 7, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

      BOO

    • Cattleprod
      Cattleprod
      September 7, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

      Well, I’m assuming she’s now Billie’s roommate… that’s how this works, right?

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      September 7, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

      She doesn’t have an arc yet, removing her from the comic is doable.

      • Maveric1984
        Maveric1984
        September 7, 2017 at 10:26 am | #

        She works at Galasso’s Pizza (and Subs).

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      September 7, 2017 at 12:30 am | #

      Billie is going to be Lucy’s roommate. Joyce is going to visit Billie every day. Lucy is, I gather, a little more clingy than I’d realized.

      Mind you, I think Lucy is totally adorkable. But if someone meeting me for the first time said, “I can wait to be best friends!”, that would be — if not a red flag, at least a rose-colored flag.

      • Geno
        Geno
        September 7, 2017 at 12:49 am | #

        Still remember the person who hates Lucy is Malaya who pretty much goes out of out of her to be a shitty person at any convenience.

        • Eldritch Gentleman
          Eldritch Gentleman
          September 7, 2017 at 5:38 am | #

          She just can’t handle all that sunshine beaming straight into her eyes. Mhm… Malaya as a Vampire Countess and Marcie as her willing victim… yes.

  3. King Daniel
    King Daniel
    September 7, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    Goddammit Malaya.

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

      More like godamnit Sal. People don’t usually do stuff that elaborate just to spite you. It’s too much effort for little to no payoff

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        September 7, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

        But who wouldn’t like Lucy?

        Malaya that’s who. And Lucy has four letters in it, just like another four-letter-word. This other four-letter-word being something used to describe excrement, and which is used as food for the dung beetle. And as many know, the ancient Egyptians worshiped dung beetles as deities. Therefore, Lucy is a goddess. Malaya is Filipina, and if you look on a globe the Philipines are halfway to the other side of the planet from Egypt. Thus, Malaya is shunned by the ancient Egyptian pantheon.

        It’s simple and logical, really.

        • Scar Man!!!
          Scar Man!!!
          September 7, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

          I desperately y need memes to describe how beautifully surreal this comment was

          • jeffepp
            jeffepp
            September 7, 2017 at 1:25 am | #

            Holy Bat-Soft-Serve-Chocolate-Ice-Cream Mr. Trump

      • The Chosen One
        The Chosen One
        September 7, 2017 at 1:25 am | #

        Has Malaya met Mike yet?

      • butting
        butting
        September 7, 2017 at 1:40 am | #

        And, Sal? I’m pretty sure it’s Marcie who wanted to hit Malaya.

  4. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    September 7, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    So, any chance this means Billie will be Lucy’s new roommate?

    Because A) hilarious and B) we’d get more Lucy in the comic.

    • DinaWho
      DinaWho
      September 7, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

      I’d say that’s probably the highest probability, given that a direct swap would be the simplest transfer.

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        September 7, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

        And Lord knows Director Puddinghead is not one to put in extra effort

  5. Madock345
    Madock345
    September 7, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    I hope this means Lucy is Billie’s new roommate.

  6. Danni
    Danni
    September 7, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

    will we see lucy again?

  7. Puckish Rogue
    Puckish Rogue
    September 7, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    I’d totally date Lucy, if I was 20 odd years younger, if she’d want to, if I’d had the courage to ask her out at that age, if she was real, if I lived in the USA, if I went to college there

    You know the usual

    • Stephen Bierce
      Stephen Bierce
      September 7, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

      Meanwhile, have you been reading Rubi Whipple?

      • Puckish Rogue
        Puckish Rogue
        September 7, 2017 at 12:15 am | #

        I haven’t but I’ll give it a look tonight after work

    • Shiro
      Shiro
      September 7, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      Well duh, Lucy is basically the Ideal Nerd Fantasy Girl.

      She got enough development in Shortpacked that I’m confident she’ll get the same rounded characterization here once she gets a bit more screen time, but yeah.

      • Puckish Rogue
        Puckish Rogue
        September 7, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

        I dunno about nerd fantasy but shes probably at least reasonably intelligent, is quite pretty and seems nice

        • Geno
          Geno
          September 7, 2017 at 12:54 am | #

          Cute nerd girl who doesn’t have serious psychological hangups, and competent enough socially that she doesn’t panic attacks in crowds. Seems pretty much a fantasy girlfriend for most young nerds. Unless they literally want like Wonder Woman or insert X anime girl here in which case they are probably taking fantasy too strongly.

          • Neeks
            Neeks
            September 7, 2017 at 3:12 am | #

            I just flashbacked (flashed back?) to a co-worker who I shit you not referred to one anime as his wife and another as his girlfriend.

            Not any particular character within said animes, mind you. The whole goddamn shows. He was like “I’m going to bring my wife and girlfriend tomorrow so you can meet them” and I was like “wow tylan that’s pretty progressive of you” and he shows up with two DVDs.

            I tried to watch them but I honestly couldn’t get past the gratuitous nudity on the covers and the synopses were tropy as heck and tbh the whole thing might well have put me off anime for life.

            I tell ya you get some weird people on the night shift at Amazon. (Myself included, of course, but I own it and at the very least do not consider myself in a polyamorous relationship with two pieces of media.)

            • Pablo360
              Pablo360
              September 7, 2017 at 9:14 am | #

              Were one or both of these anime Harry Potter harem knockoffs?

      • zoelogical
        zoelogical
        September 7, 2017 at 2:20 am | #

        she lacks one critical component of the Nerd Fantasy Girl: she doesn’t revolve her life around men

        • Andrusi
          Andrusi
          September 7, 2017 at 7:56 am | #

          No, no, the Nerd Fantasy Girl’s life doesn’t revolve around men, it revolves around the one particular nerd having the fantasy.

          (“Money? Nerds? One par-ticu-lar nerd?”)

          • zoelogical
            zoelogical
            September 7, 2017 at 7:20 pm | #

            oh right my bad

            the nerd has to compete with her dad for the right of being the Singular Man ™ she revolves her life around in a game of no homo chicken that only ends once the dad recognizes him as the worthy champion of his daughter. but they never forget and they never forgive

    • Thor
      Thor
      September 7, 2017 at 1:44 am | #

      Funny, I’d totally date Malaya. You always know where you stand with Malaya.

      Unless you are Marcie, of course.

  8. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    September 7, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    *plays The Alan Parsons Project’s “Damned If I Do” on the hacked Muzak*

  9. Mr. Mendo
    Mr. Mendo
    September 7, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    Huh, so I guess we can add Lucy to the list of people who find Malaya appealing for some mysterious reason… 😉

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

      She has been slightly less assholish in this comic, considering she’s doing her best to learn sign language.

      • Gesc
        Gesc
        September 7, 2017 at 12:56 am | #

        Really? Because so far I think of her as a shallow bongo (and the whole act got already) and I haven’t read anything else by Willis.

        Can’t imagine just how worse she can get.

        • Mr. Mendo
          Mr. Mendo
          September 7, 2017 at 1:01 am | #

          Oh, such horrors await you in the Shortpacked! archives…

          • Gesc
            Gesc
            September 7, 2017 at 1:02 am | #

            I’m not that interested in anything else, even less after reading some snippets here. Maybe eventually.

            Also I got censored! But she IS a beeyatch.

          • timemonkey
            timemonkey
            September 7, 2017 at 2:16 am | #

            Being harassed by idiots everyday in a job you don’t like while having fanboys/fangirls vomit their fandoms on you constantly even though you’ve clearly expressed a dislike for both them and the fandoms will take a toll on a person’s pleasantness.

            • Mr. Mendo
              Mr. Mendo
              September 7, 2017 at 5:00 am | #

              And she didn’t have that much to begin with…

          • Andrew_C
            Andrew_C
            September 7, 2017 at 7:12 pm | #

            Wrll yeah, that goes without saying. Or are you talking about Malaya in particular?

    • Koms
      Koms
      September 7, 2017 at 12:15 am | #

      Lucy would probably find everyone appealing.

      • Mr. Mendo
        Mr. Mendo
        September 7, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

        That’s true. She’s sunny! ^_^

        • hof1991
          hof1991
          September 7, 2017 at 8:26 am | #

          Even her name means “as of light”, though it used to mean you were born at dawn.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            September 7, 2017 at 10:24 am | #

            Lucy-fer?

            Suspicious.

            (I really need a Mary Gravatar for this one, not Lucy.)

            • Ed Rhodes
              Ed Rhodes
              September 7, 2017 at 8:14 pm | #

              Lucy-fer?
              Suspicious.
              (I really need a Mary Gravatar for this one, not Lucy.)

              http://luciphurrsimps.com/2009/12/21/20091014-prow1s1/

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        September 7, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

        Even Not-Ryan and Toedad?

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      September 7, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

      Well, Malaya’s pretty cute until she opens her mouth.

      • Mr. Mendo
        Mr. Mendo
        September 7, 2017 at 12:30 am | #

        *flashbacks to Jackie from “That ’70s Show”…*

    • Geno
      Geno
      September 7, 2017 at 12:55 am | #

      Lucy is a sweetheart. She could find reasons to be nice to pretty anyone. Maybe not Mike

      • Tacos
        Tacos
        September 7, 2017 at 1:14 am | #

        What about Mary?

    • zoelogical
      zoelogical
      September 7, 2017 at 2:21 am | #

      she legit just met malaya lmao

    • Emily
      Emily
      September 7, 2017 at 5:25 am | #

      I think Lucy may just be really friendly to people in general.

    • Andrusi
      Andrusi
      September 7, 2017 at 7:58 am | #

      Everyone’s appealing if they haven’t said or done anything yet and you aren’t judging them by their appearance.

    • James Rye
      James Rye
      September 7, 2017 at 2:44 pm | #

      She got dat booty, dude! Ofc they find her appealing.^^

  10. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    September 7, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    So I guess this isn’t what she consider to be a improvement

  11. Catullus
    Catullus
    September 7, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

    Something I’ve been wondering for a while:

    How is Malaya’s name pronounced? Rhyming with “paella” or rhyming with “papaya”?

    • Nico
      Nico
      September 7, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

      If I remember right, Malaya’s Filipina, so it would be rhyming with “papaya” (ma-LIE-ah).

      • Lingo
        Lingo
        September 7, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

        This one gets my vote.

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        September 7, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

        That’s how I’ve pronounced it myself.

      • Tacos
        Tacos
        September 7, 2017 at 12:34 am | #

        That’s how I’ve always pronounced it.

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        September 7, 2017 at 12:42 am | #

        The only Malaya I know IRL pronounces her name that way (rhymes-with-papaya). In Tagalog “malaya” means “free” (in the sense of “freedom”). Apparently it’s a not uncommon name for Filipino girls.

        • Scar Man!!!
          Scar Man!!!
          September 7, 2017 at 10:38 pm | #

          that’s a pretty cool name origin.

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      September 7, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

      I’ve always pronounced it “ma-LAY-uh”.

      • StClair
        StClair
        September 7, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

        this, here.

      • davidbreslin101
        davidbreslin101
        September 7, 2017 at 11:04 am | #

        …after the region of south-east Asia? Same here- I’d never encountered it as a name before.

  12. m-m
    m-m
    September 7, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    Looks like we’re gonna get some exposition on Sal and her gloves. Could be good.

    • Tacos
      Tacos
      September 7, 2017 at 12:29 am | #

      We already know why she wears the gloves.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      September 7, 2017 at 12:29 am | #

      I think getting stabbed in the hand is really all you need to know.

    • Gesc
      Gesc
      September 7, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

      I don’t think Sal would want to give any exposition about it though. Ever. Even less to Malaya.

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      September 7, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

      This is more of a pre-fired Chekhov’s Gun. Anyone who’s read the Amber-in-the-convenience-store flashback has probably figured out why Sal always wears gloves.

    • m-m
      m-m
      September 7, 2017 at 1:02 am | #

      We know she got stabbed, but physical wounds are important as fuck in the Dumbi-verse (scar guy, Joyce’s hand, sal’s hand, marcy’s voice) Sal hasn’t explained her reason for covering her hands to anyone in universe. Walky, Marcie, and Billie haven’t acknowledged it either. These are interesting perspectives on Sal’s character, especially since she makes a concerted effort to conceal(or, at least, not reveal) both the scar and the circumstances that led to it.

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        September 7, 2017 at 2:18 am | #

        All three of those people already know she got her hand stabbed robbing a store and therefore have no reason to comment on it as the reasons are obvious.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          September 7, 2017 at 3:45 am | #

          Billie might not – she didn’t even know she robbed a store until this year when Walky told her.

          That said, she’s also the one who would be least likely to ask.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      September 7, 2017 at 3:06 pm | #

      We just saw the running subplot set up for the next few months (years), as Malaya keeps coming up with wacky schemes to trick Sal into removing her gloves, only to get thwarted at the last second, by incredibly improbable plot devices.

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        September 7, 2017 at 4:21 pm | #

        Like a second pair of gloves?

        (See Jamison’s bandanna in “Girls With Slingshots”).

  13. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    September 7, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    Malaya, if you couldn’t even stand 5 minutes of perkiness, I’ve got bad news for the rest of your life.

    • newllend(henryvolt)
      newllend(henryvolt)
      September 7, 2017 at 2:59 am | #

      God I can just Imagine all hell breaking loose the minute she runs into Joyce and Becky.

  14. Scar Man!!!
    Scar Man!!!
    September 7, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    So, if cheerful enthusiastic optimists are something she hates, but she also dislikes ” performative rebels”, what kind of people -does- she like? Does -she- even know, herself?

    • Mr. Mendo
      Mr. Mendo
      September 7, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

      Malaya’s the sort of person who thinks being defined by what she *doesn’t* like makes her better than people who actually do like stuff.

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        September 7, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

        I feel sad for those people. I don’t understand how they can ever be happy

        • Mr. Mendo
          Mr. Mendo
          September 7, 2017 at 12:28 am | #

          They aren’t happy, they just learn to live with making that everyone else’s problem.

          • Scar Man!!!
            Scar Man!!!
            September 7, 2017 at 12:39 am | #

            That’s still sad

      • Marius Wynyard
        Marius Wynyard
        September 10, 2017 at 10:30 pm | #

        I think you just described 99% of YouTube/Facebook commenters. 😇

    • Shiro
      Shiro
      September 7, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

      She likes people who are too disaffected and cool to care about anything or anyone, which is either as performative as she thinks the rebels are, or a sign of severe depression.

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        September 7, 2017 at 12:15 am | #

        Is Marcie really like that? She seems to do something More than tolerate her at least…

        • Scar Man!!!
          Scar Man!!!
          September 7, 2017 at 12:24 am | #

          MALAYA. Malaya more than tolerate Marcie

          • Neeks
            Neeks
            September 7, 2017 at 3:17 am | #

            To be fair, Marcie more than tolerates Malaya, so the comment works.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        September 7, 2017 at 7:29 am | #

        And yet she doesn’t like Sal. Who’s probably the most disaffected and cool character and she does like Marcie, who’s not that.

        To quote Carla: “She’s not sneering at anybody from a wall? I mean, I’m into that, but I think Marcie likes doin’ shit.”

        • Scar Man!!!
          Scar Man!!!
          September 7, 2017 at 9:06 am | #

          To be fair, she might have liked Do a If Sal hasn’t immediately started getting jealous and snitty

          • Scar Man!!!
            Scar Man!!!
            September 7, 2017 at 9:07 am | #

            Stupid autocorrect

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 7, 2017 at 1:10 am | #

      If Malaya in this comic is anything like her Walkyverse counterpart, Malaya dislikes everyone but herself and her potential love interests.

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        September 7, 2017 at 9:05 am | #

        Everyone and everything?

  15. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    September 7, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

    Malaya didn’t even unpack before she made up her mind to get a room transfer. Maybe she won’t have to worry about that this time either. :p

    • Passchendaele
      Passchendaele
      September 7, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

      Also I forgot, is Billie going to the forest center? We might have another recurring character now. :p

  16. HL
    HL
    September 7, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

    my god i’m Lucy

    • Puckish Rogue
      Puckish Rogue
      September 7, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      That’s a good thing isn’t it?

  17. Shiro
    Shiro
    September 7, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

    So, is this better or worse than Lucy ending up with Sal and Malaya with Billie?

    • Fart Captor
      Fart Captor
      September 7, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      I think worse. I can’t see Sal having any trouble getting along with Lucy, and since Billie’s gonna be away with Ruth much of the time, that’d make “not attempting to interact with Malaya” especially easy.

      I think the main danger there would be Sarah dying from a friendliness overdose, or possibly spraining something while trying to find a reason to not like Lucy

      • Shiro
        Shiro
        September 7, 2017 at 12:18 am | #

        Oh gosh now I’m imagining a timeline in which Joyce and Lucy get to hang out consistently, and I think I see rainbows and hear unicorns singing.

        • Poskie
          Poskie
          September 7, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

          yes this please

  18. rectilinearpropagation
    rectilinearpropagation
    September 7, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

    I need to find some way to pay myself to stop guessing at what must have happened in the comic because I am ALWAYS WRONG.

  19. Kay
    Kay
    September 7, 2017 at 12:15 am | #

    I hate u Malaya, and yet. I love u. You remain the only person I can ship with Carla…..

    • Geno
      Geno
      September 7, 2017 at 1:00 am | #

      Damn I never thought about that until just now. There are like maybe 3 people who wouldn’t be weird for one reason or another.

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      September 7, 2017 at 1:08 am | #

      A) performance in past universes is no guarantee of performance in present universes.

      B) you can ship anyone with anyone else if you’re determined enough.

      I don’t care, I ship it!

  20. Tori
    Tori
    September 7, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    To be honest, if someone came on that strong, I’d probably want to bail, too. I actually shared a room (yes, a single, very large room) with five other people my freshman year, and the entire reason it worked for us was because we were friendLY, but not friends. We didn’t spend too much time together, and what time we did spend together we usually spent in common spaces — in-room time was personal time.

    I really regretted rooming with friends in later years. Even though it was just me and one or two other people, we best buddies would of course spend all our time together both in-room and out-of-room, and ultimately we ended up grating on each others’ nerves because we were unable to escape each other. Freshman year remains the best roommate situation I ever lived in.

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

      You make a good point

    • autogatos
      autogatos
      September 7, 2017 at 12:37 am | #

      I’ve always sworn to never live with friends because it’s SO hard to find someone who is actually compatible to live with and that seems like a great way to end up resenting your friends!

      I’ve only ever known two people I actually enjoyed living with, one was my one male room mate in college (we lived in apartments, not dorms, so there was no gender restriction). He was my best friend in college and we had similar enough preferences in living space that we didn’t drive each other nuts (and he kept me sane when dealing with my other room mate who was SUPER messy and would literally leave her half-eaten food everywhere). We also didn’t literally share a ROOM, just an apartment, so that probably helped. We each had our own space.

      The only other person I’ve ever actually enjoyed living with is my husband. Go figure.

    • 3oranges
      3oranges
      September 7, 2017 at 11:44 am | #

      If someone came on that strong, I’d want to tell them to back off, they seem nice but are coming on way too strong and we’re just going to be roommates. But putting in a transfer immediately should be an overreaction. You have to expect to put in a little effort to get along with a roommate, and this seems like a pretty low level.

      I mean, there are much worse roommate situations to be in, right? Consider this: if this was the first chance Malaya got to switch, that means Roz and Mary weren’t on the list. Roz did have a scheme to get her own room, but otherwise even those two tried harder to coexist than Malaya did with Lucy.

      • Tori
        Tori
        September 7, 2017 at 11:49 pm | #

        Oh, sure! I’m not saying I’d go as far as an immediate room transfer (I mean, as far as I know, most colleges have policies preventing that anyway?). Just that I can relate to the sentiment.

  21. BBCC
    BBCC
    September 7, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

    A) Fuck you, Malaya, you don’t know why someone would wear gloves all the time.

    B) Sal, really? You’re brighter than that.

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

      Lead to stupidity, hate does

    • Joy
      Joy
      September 7, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

      it waz a flippant comment. i doubt zhe zeriouzly thought that

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        September 7, 2017 at 1:28 am | #

        I’m joking about Sal. Malaya I’m mildly irritated with, but I still like her.

    • butting
      butting
      September 7, 2017 at 1:58 am | #

      A) Marcie wears gloves all the time.

      (unless she doesn’t. WINK.)

  22. Kater
    Kater
    September 7, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

    I hope we get more Lucy now!

  23. brasca1
    brasca1
    September 7, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

    Well at least Billie is a marked improvement over Malaya so it won’t be all bad for Lucy.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      September 7, 2017 at 2:22 am | #

      Malaya will ignore you, Billie will actively criticise and is a former bully. Character development means she probably won’t be but Billie could easily have been far worse.

  24. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    September 7, 2017 at 12:26 am | #

    I didn’t even realize Sal was wearing her undies. I guess boxer briefs or boxers as lounge wear isn’t too uncommon, though I’m pretty sure we’ve seen her in panties before, so maybe that’s what threw me.

    Anyways, I like Lucy. I’d go with “I love Lucy” for the show reference, but admittedly, I jumped on Shortpacked late and didn’t really get to know her too great, so it wouldn’t be entirely accurate.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      September 7, 2017 at 1:20 am | #

      I don’t think she is. I checked last strip, she seems to be earring jean shorts.

  25. Tacos
    Tacos
    September 7, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

    Please tell me Lucy will be Billie’s new room mate. Then she could appear more often.

  26. Dean
    Dean
    September 7, 2017 at 12:36 am | #

    No tag for Forest Quad front desk guy? Do we just call him not-Asma?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 12:41 am | #

      Yeah, he may be cool but he’s not Asma cool.

    • butting
      butting
      September 7, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

      Is it wrong that I want to take Black Books’ lead and call him Beardie-Weirdy?

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 7, 2017 at 1:08 am | #

      Yes, if Asma gets a name then Forest Quad front desk guy deserves a name as well.

      • Tacos
        Tacos
        September 7, 2017 at 1:15 am | #

        Forrest Quaid >.>

        • Fire_daws
          Fire_daws
          September 7, 2017 at 3:59 pm | #

          Don’cha mean Hauser?

  27. pjeseb
    pjeseb
    September 7, 2017 at 12:37 am | #

    If Lucy is Malaya’s idea of the worst roommate ever, I think Malaya will be perfectly happy with her new home.

    If not, then too damn bad.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

      …at least until she realizes she is neighbor with Joyce…

      • Tacos
        Tacos
        September 7, 2017 at 1:09 am | #

        Imagine if Malaya had to room with Joyce, Lucy and Becky. She’d probably explode from all that concentrated happiness and sunshine.

        • zoelogical
          zoelogical
          September 7, 2017 at 2:25 am | #

          this would be hilarious

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        September 7, 2017 at 3:11 am | #

        Actually, if Malaya starts trouble with Joyce, she’ll quickly realise that it’s a bad idea to pick on a girl who is practically the entire floor’s cute baby sister. I mean, would you want to simultaneously get on the bad side of Sarah, Sal and Carla? Heck, even Dorothy could be a threat of a kind Malaya lacks the instincts to handle!

  28. Bagge
    Bagge
    September 7, 2017 at 12:43 am | #

    God dammit, Lucy

  29. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    September 7, 2017 at 12:55 am | #

    Awww, I hope it’ll turn out to be Billie & Lucy as new roommates! They could be great for each other.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 12:58 am | #

      We-e-e-ell… Lucy would make Billie not miss Joyce that much…. I’m not sure Billie would be all that great fro Lucy unless she needs some pointers on keggers.

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        September 7, 2017 at 3:09 am | #

        That’s the thing; I think that Lucy would introduce Billie to a mode of thinking and a way of life she hasn’t ever really had since entering her teen years. It might turn out to be healthier for her not to be around high-tension and angst-drenched personalities like Ruth and Sal so much.

        • Emily
          Emily
          September 7, 2017 at 5:31 am | #

          Billie could definitely benefit from having a space in her life not riddled with drama.

  30. Gesc
    Gesc
    September 7, 2017 at 1:00 am | #

    … So did she ever unpack or has she been pretending she hasn’t finished moving until now?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 1:10 am | #

      Nah, she’s too cool to unpack.

      • Pablo360
        Pablo360
        September 7, 2017 at 9:16 am | #

        Have you seen how much baggage she has? It’d take a team of special-ops psychiatrists to unpack all that.

  31. Dandi_Andi
    Dandi_Andi
    September 7, 2017 at 1:01 am | #

    I thought it was worth mentioning that the new Slipshine is up for people who are subscribed to it. And wow…

    Just wow.

    It’s deeply moving.

  32. Pylgrim
    Pylgrim
    September 7, 2017 at 1:31 am | #

    So Malaya is a flower that wilts under loving conditions and flourishes with hate. I notice that she didn’t make an attempt to transfer after learning she was rooming with Sal.

    • zoelogical
      zoelogical
      September 7, 2017 at 2:27 am | #

      she actually really likes sal, i bet.

      sal fights back.

  33. BenRG
    BenRG
    September 7, 2017 at 2:10 am | #

    Yeah, nothing against her but Lucy is the sort of personality that would have Malaya running with her tail between her legs. When you’re that misanthropic and self-centred, being around someone that bright, cheerful and optimistic is physically painful.

    • Eldritch Gentleman
      Eldritch Gentleman
      September 7, 2017 at 3:41 am | #

      Ohohoho, wait till she meets Joyce. There is no escaping from the sunshine for you Malaya.

  34. redraine
    redraine
    September 7, 2017 at 2:24 am | #

    I just realized you like, made the middle panel transparent. it appears black on the discord.

  35. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    September 7, 2017 at 3:24 am | #

    Seriously Malaya, what’s your deal with Lucy? She is a cute, fun, maybe a bit awkward nerd girl!

    • bunivasal
      bunivasal
      September 7, 2017 at 2:15 pm | #

      That’s easy: Malaya fucking sucks

  36. Delicious Taffy
    Delicious Taffy
    September 7, 2017 at 4:05 am | #

    Oh, hey, I just realised I never clarified on the haircut business, the other night. Sound the Vanity Alarms because it’s time for an update.

    So, my brother, girlfriend, and friend took me to a trusted salon to get my hair cut, after nearly two consecutive years without so much as a trim. I had no thoughts regarding any particular style, other than “Uh, shorter….?”, but my brother insisted I pick something.

    Now, I don’t know if any of you have looked at a men’s hairstyle catalogue before, and this might just be me, but every single hairstyle looks the goddamn same. Everyone else kept telling me the pictures weren’t all identical, though, so? Either way, it was one of the most stressful choices I’ve ever made over something like personal vanity.

    I finally settled on a style Chris Hemsworth was modeling, because Chris Hemsworth was modeling it. So, the stylist sat me down, washed my hair, and got to choppin’. Everyone kept asking how I felt about the haircut, though, which was a little off-putting. Like, I’m sat here with sopping-wet, half-cut hair, and we haven’t even finished reducing the length, gimme a bloody minute to process everything.

    This is getting long, so I’ll wrap it up to avoid rambling too much about a friggin’ haircut. After about an hour of negotiating and cutting, I now look bangin’, and honestly feel much more confident. Every other haircut in my life has been a buzzcut, and then I just let my hair grow until the next one. This is the first time I’ve been to a stylist and gotten a proper cut, and it’s a totally different feeling.

    • OnyxIdol
      OnyxIdol
      September 7, 2017 at 6:40 am | #

      Looks snazzy 😉

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        September 7, 2017 at 4:23 pm | #

        Liberation usually does.

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 9:05 am | #

      Your forehead is big. It is good

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        September 7, 2017 at 4:24 pm | #

        I hope to one day have a Code Lyoko forehead.

        • StClair
          StClair
          September 7, 2017 at 7:41 pm | #

          whoaaaaa, let’s not get all crazy here.

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      September 7, 2017 at 8:47 pm | #

      I kinda know that feeling. The barber I went to for over a decade shut down early this year and i’ve been just letting it grow for now. Unfortunately the haircut experience I prefer is going the way of the dodo for the type of salon style experience you’re describing, which I’ve never enjoyed when I’ve done it (well, ok, I do enjoy the shampoo and scalp masage part).

  37. Screwball
    Screwball
    September 7, 2017 at 4:12 am | #

    I think we might just have been given a pretty good clue who Billie’s gonna be roommates with now. Gonna be interesting…

  38. kilgaen
    kilgaen
    September 7, 2017 at 5:08 am | #

    Good to see Lucy! Here’s a question. Have we ever seen Sal’s bare hands? Is she hiding scars or a condition? Or are they just really and surprisingly delicate and baby soft?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 5:58 am | #

      Scars…

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/down/

    • Tom T.
      Tom T.
      September 7, 2017 at 7:24 am | #

      That’s also why Mickey Mouse always wears gloves. Little-known story. 😉

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        September 7, 2017 at 8:11 am | #

        “It’s on America’s tortured brow,
        That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow!
        ”
        — David Bowie
        — Life on Mars

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        September 7, 2017 at 9:19 pm | #

        That’s just a cover-up story. The real reason that Mickey Mouse wears gloves is that he actually has hideous raptor talons instead of hands. (He uses them to tear up the flesh of the children he eats.)

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      September 7, 2017 at 3:16 pm | #

      She is actually a high level hand model, and is contractually obligated to keep her hands covered at all times.

  39. Scar Man!!!
    Scar Man!!!
    September 7, 2017 at 9:03 am | #

    Off-topic, but can someone re-explain to me what drew Ruth to Billy and vice-versa? They sure have chemistry now, but I can’t remember the nature of the moments that sparked the flame.

    • Scar Man!!!
      Scar Man!!!
      September 7, 2017 at 9:04 am | #

      Forgot to say please. Sorry about

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 7, 2017 at 9:39 am | #

      Shoves is loves
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/04-the-do-list/secretly/

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        September 7, 2017 at 9:40 am | #

        Or, you know, allow Joyce to present two additional factors

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/curiosity/

        • Bagge
          Bagge
          September 7, 2017 at 10:06 am | #

          To be less silly… I think it started as being much more about themselves than each other but it evolved into a functional and even beautiful relationship. I think it went something like this.

          Billie pushed all the wrong buttons for Ruth. A rude, popular, alcoholic cheerleader who managed to crash her car into a tree while drunk (the same way Ruth’s parents were killed), so Ruth targeted her for harassment and dominance. At the same time, Ruth was already so far down her depression that ANY feeling was welcome, including the anger she felt for Billie. Billie, of course, picked up the gauntlet and stood up to the tyrannic RA, and their conflict escalated.

          At some point – maybe from the first time they met, maybe down the line, Ruth realised that she did not ONLY feel anger towards Billie and she forced-kissed her with the rational that she would probably die soon anyway so why not (Ruth has been in a GREAT head-space this entire time). Billie of course told her to fuck off, but with time and some mutual hurt/comfort they decided to just fuck instead.

          Billie was feeling increasingly worthless in all aspects except the value Ruth saw in her (Billie has GREAT self-esteem), and Ruth’s attention was flattering. Her ability to keep Ruth alive and functional became increasingly important for her entire sense of self-worth. Together they could escape the world that simply didn’t work any longer. They could drink and fuck and not be dead.

          And it worked…to some extent… for a while.

          Of course – there is LOTS to love. Ruth is strong, aggressive, and hot. Billie is rebellious, confident and sexy. They challenge each other. They fullfil a sex dream for each other. Ruth landed herself a hot cheerleader (“Go Leafs”). Billie landed herself the resident bully (quite a score for a self-proclaimed alpha bongo). More importantly, they fill an emotional void for each other. Billie gives Ruth a source of emotions. Ruth gives Billie a sense of purpose. But I think all that grew on them after they had already established a weird co-dependence based on bullying.

          They are toxic as fudge for each other and had a horrible start, but in some weird way they seem to make it work.

          • Simarie
            Simarie
            September 7, 2017 at 4:13 pm | #

            I also think part of it is the fact is that when Billie was hiding in Ruth’s closet to get her cheer uniform back she saw that Ruth doesn’t have a great home life and that is when Billie started occasionally being nice to Ruth as well as I can remember. I am not sure if it is as she stated her sense of obligation as a (former) head cheerleader, or if she feels a sense of empathy. Billie has implied pretty clearly she also doesn’t have a great home life. (though in her case it means to just be emotional neglect.)
            but other than the effect that incident had on them, I completely agree with you.

          • Puckish Rogue
            Puckish Rogue
            September 7, 2017 at 6:29 pm | #

            “but in some weird way they seem to make it work.”

            Far too early to tell I reckon, like they’re both (still?) suicidal, the violence as a first resort is still there so really what would it take for one (both) to make a fatal and/or dangerous decision, not much I’d suggest

            At the moment they’re both toxic and need help

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              September 7, 2017 at 8:31 pm | #

              They definitely need help, but I don’t think the relationship is their problem. They’d both need help, even if they broke up.

              • Puckish Rogue
                Puckish Rogue
                September 7, 2017 at 8:38 pm | #

                Well they both seemed to be reinforcing the whole suicide pact thing, probably just me being narrow-minded but I don’t think either of them should be in a relationship right now

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      September 7, 2017 at 10:00 am | #

      What drew Ruth to Billie? I’d say she just fell for Billie without any particular reason, because that happens sometimes, despite your best efforts.

      Like, she had no reason whatsoever to like Billie, what with knowing that Billie had a DUI (something that killed Ruth’s parents). But yet it happened. Perhaps she liked that Billie was not one to be easily cowed by her tyranny. But more likely, the hormones just conspired against everything else that told Ruth this was a bad idea.

      As for Billie liking Ruth… When she finally understood the full extent of Ruth’s behaviour*, the final change occured too. Not just knowing that Ruth had an abusive guardian (which had already changed her demeanor somewhat) , but knowing that Ruth actually had developed a crush on Billie despite it being far more likely and logical** to just loathe her….

      That’s when Billie probably realised she was getting a crush on Ruth (and I think it started a bit sooner, but she just didn’t allow herself to realise it). It may partially have been her “giving tree” nature, in that she’d now find someone she could care for. It may also have been the fact that Billie would know that Ruth would be one of the few people that would truly understand the addiction of alcohol.

      * http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/not-directly/

      **Well, to a certain extent, at least. I mean, Billie did not actually kill anyone with her DUI, but still, DUI is one of the shittiest things to do because it’s one of the irresponsible things that can fuck other people up as much or more than yourself.

  40. TomHCinMI
    TomHCinMI
    September 7, 2017 at 11:30 am | #

    OK, now, as of Thu 9/7/17, Lucy (or Lucie?) has been in three strips. Now all of a sudden I want to know more about Lucy. I hope we’ll see more of her? Even though clearly Malaya and Marcie would like to see less of her!

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      September 7, 2017 at 12:09 pm | #

      It’s interesting really; Lucy seems to have originated as the ‘voice’ of innocence in comic books during the ‘Shortpacked!’ era. She was in one or two strips contrasting the positive view of comic book characters with the dour, downbeat and cynical viewpoint of Frank Miller and his disciples.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      September 7, 2017 at 2:33 pm | #

      I’m just happy that I got Lucy as my Gravatar right before she hopefully takes at least a slightly larger role.

  41. Yumi
    Yumi
    September 7, 2017 at 11:32 am | #

    I went to bed before midnight for the firstf time in a long time last night, and I woke up wondering if I had commented on the comic. Then it loaded and I was confused for a minute.

  42. nightsbridge
    nightsbridge
    September 7, 2017 at 12:39 pm | #

    Gosh, Sal has such a blind spot with Malaya. She just thinks everything Malaya does revolves around her.

  43. Guest42
    Guest42
    September 7, 2017 at 1:11 pm | #

    Aw, I miss Lucy from Shortpacked.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      September 7, 2017 at 4:08 pm | #

      So do I.

      You could say I love Lucy.

  44. miina
    miina
    September 7, 2017 at 1:21 pm | #

    “You wear your gloves in your underwear” says the girl in the BAD sweatshirt

  45. Smooti
    Smooti
    September 7, 2017 at 2:30 pm | #

    “…Oh god, you wear gloves in your underwear”

    yknow, if i in real life knew someone like sal and didnt know the history behind said gloves-wearing-all-the-time-ness, yeah, i’d probably think she was just kinda trying too hard to project an image, because god was my college life full of people who wore specific articles of clothing every day in order to do just that.

    • chris73
      chris73
      September 7, 2017 at 3:19 pm | #

      Sal projecting an image? Why thats preposterous, preposterous I say.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        September 7, 2017 at 4:08 pm | #

        Except she’s not projecting an image with her gloves. She’s trying to hide scars.

        • Puckish Rogue
          Puckish Rogue
          September 7, 2017 at 6:25 pm | #

          Sure not with the gloves but, from Malayas pov, everything else is an image so I can totally see where Malaya would get that idea from

          • Smooti
            Smooti
            September 7, 2017 at 7:07 pm | #

            yeah, as far as malaya’s aware sal is just constantly trying to project an image of being cool.

            so of course she wears motorcycle gloves in her underwear.

            • Puckish Rogue
              Puckish Rogue
              September 7, 2017 at 8:27 pm | #

              Sort of reminds me a little of The Dark Knight Returns: “Sure, you play it mysterious – but it’s a loud kind of mysterious, man”

              I’m sure Sal is sincere about being a brooding loner and all but it comes off a little “look at how brooding I am” especially in Sals eyes

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            September 7, 2017 at 9:25 pm | #

            It’s one thing to see things that way, it’s another to voice your assumptions out loud. That is 100% Malaya being a douchecanoe.

            • Puckish Rogue
              Puckish Rogue
              September 7, 2017 at 9:42 pm | #

              True but its not like they don’t have somewhat of a history

              • BBCC
                BBCC
                September 7, 2017 at 11:01 pm | #

                That is true, but it’s really not an excuse. It’s also not an excuse for Sal to be an ass.

  46. Questionor
    Questionor
    September 7, 2017 at 3:19 pm | #

    ya know, I originally didn’t think much of Malaya and she came off kind of negative and jerky. I’ve changed my mind, she seems the most normal of everyone DoA now. I went back and looked at the other strips with her and the jerky seems to have only been in response to others being negative to her.

    • Smooti
      Smooti
      September 7, 2017 at 7:10 pm | #

      i agree! i feel like a lot of people forget malaya’s probably between 17-19 at the most and actually acts like a typical 17-19 year old to the situations she’s been in.

      • Puckish Rogue
        Puckish Rogue
        September 7, 2017 at 8:28 pm | #

        You could apply that to most of the cast I reckon

  47. Vangeln
    Vangeln
    September 7, 2017 at 3:36 pm | #

    Malaya will love Joyce’s ‘wakey wakey!’ raids.

  48. Spencer
    Spencer
    September 7, 2017 at 4:07 pm | #

    It boggles the mind how a strip prominently featuring Malaya’s butt hasn’t summoned Yotomoe.

  49. Spencer
    Spencer
    September 7, 2017 at 5:33 pm | #

    I just found out the guy I have a crush on at work is into dudes.

    I don’t know if that makes it better or worse.

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      September 7, 2017 at 6:29 pm | #

      depends on who’s writing the story

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        September 7, 2017 at 6:44 pm | #

        You got me into larger Transformers fandom and my current favourite comic series so you have actually had an impact on my life.

        Does God answer bisexual prayers?

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        September 7, 2017 at 6:48 pm | #

        Also the part where you wrote one of the best bisexual characters I’ve had the pleasure of reading about. That was pretty dang great too.

        • Scar Man!!!
          Scar Man!!!
          September 7, 2017 at 7:01 pm | #

          Which character would that be?

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            September 7, 2017 at 7:02 pm | #

            Danny. He was a big deal to me because we found out he was bi at around the same time I was just accepting that I was bisexual.

            • Rowen Morland
              Rowen Morland
              September 7, 2017 at 7:47 pm | #

              It was pretty gracefully done too. Hope things worked out at least as well for you.

            • Scar Man!!!
              Scar Man!!!
              September 7, 2017 at 10:36 pm | #

              nice how stuff lines up sometimes, doesn’t it?

  50. Puckish Rogue
    Puckish Rogue
    September 7, 2017 at 9:15 pm | #

    Question for the author (if that’s ok), being that Joyce is based on you are any of the other characters also based on you or people you know specifically (girlfriends, best friends etc)or just random people you’ve met over the years (assuming that the Brown family is based on your up bringing)

    Cheers if you answer, no worries if you don’t

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      September 7, 2017 at 10:38 pm | #

      For some characters they were based on real people 30 or 20 years ago, but after a few decades of comics they’re not really based on them anymore.

      • Puckish Rogue
        Puckish Rogue
        September 7, 2017 at 11:09 pm | #

        Ah ok cool thanks, see I was wondering if Becky was someone you knew quite well (given the backstory and character growth shes shown) or was an amalgamation of a number of people

  51. Kayla Graham
    Kayla Graham
    September 7, 2017 at 9:39 pm | #

    It was really easy to get a room transfer my freshman year at IU. Just had to tell them that my drunk roommates tried to set my bed on fire while I was lying half asleep in said bed.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 8, 2017 at 1:25 am | #

      As long as that wasn’t in the room mate agreement.

  52. Mr D
    Mr D
    September 8, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    oh god, Sal’s hands must smell funky AF

  53. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    September 8, 2017 at 2:04 pm | #

    Something people may not be considering:

    Malaya’s last roommate was the epitome of a friendly, outgoing, easy-to-get-along-with roommate.

    Malaya rejected her almost instantly.

    Her new roommate is hostile, abrasive, confrontational, and will no doubt be unpleasant to her every hour of every day.

    This is exactly what she’s looking for.

  54. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    October 4, 2017 at 10:53 am | #

    *is now watching all boxes intently*

    Yep, you don’t fully know Malaya until you’ve punched her. Which is fairly likely to happen. 😛

    • Passchendaele
      Passchendaele
      October 4, 2017 at 10:56 am | #

      Well, actually, I don’t believe Sal’s punched her, so there’s still plenty of learning/character development to go around. And/or murder.

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