Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 8, 2026

Fort

by David M Willis on September 27, 2011 at 12:01 am
  • 06 - Yesterday Was Thursday
└ Tags: dorothy, jennifer, joyce, ron, roz

Discussion (159) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    September 27, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    Nice jugs, Billie!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

      You mean Nice Kegs dontcha?

      • iSaidCandleja-
        iSaidCandleja-
        September 27, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

        That too.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        September 27, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

        What ke- Oh those kegs.

    • David Herbert
      David Herbert
      September 27, 2011 at 2:18 am | #

      She supports them well.

    • tom
      tom
      September 27, 2011 at 12:50 pm | #

      that’s funny, I was too distracted by the freckles on Dorothy’s shoulders…

    • Phillip Wilde
      Phillip Wilde
      September 27, 2011 at 1:37 pm | #

      I see what you did there.

  2. Bobnotk
    Bobnotk
    September 27, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    I don’t think Billie is even human if she hasn’t passed out yet.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

      Her alcohol tolerance must be OVER 9000!

      • Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
        Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
        September 27, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

        Only one plausible explanation could be that aliens abducted her and realized they made a mistake in doing so and never abducted another human again in this universe. Her liver should be SHOT by now.

      • Just for kix
        Just for kix
        September 27, 2011 at 2:28 pm | #

        No way, over 9000! Check the scouter again!

        • lightsabermario
          lightsabermario
          September 27, 2011 at 4:08 pm | #

          Oops, too late, I broke it. For dramatic effect.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 12:07 am | #

      So those are tanks of ethanol… makes perfect sense. 😛

      • Izzy
        Izzy
        September 27, 2011 at 1:21 am | #

        I’m lazy, Plasma, You should totally link me to a good dorothy page so i can be of service…

      • Azumango
        Azumango
        September 27, 2011 at 1:26 am | #

        Yelling Bird approved.

    • Ancestral Hamster
      Ancestral Hamster
      September 27, 2011 at 1:27 am | #

      Billie in DoA is part-Asian, but no one has asked what the other part is. The answer is “tree shrew”. The species of tree shrew in the article linked below metabolizes alcohol so quickly it avoids both drunkeness and the long-term effects of alcohol abuse. Clearly Billie is part-Asian, part-tree shrew and has inherited the miracle metabolism from the shrew side of the family.

      http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/80beats/2008/07/29/tiny-tree-shrews-live-on-alcohol-but-never-get-drunk/

      • OhHayMike
        OhHayMike
        September 27, 2011 at 1:41 am | #

        I hate to be “that guy”, but the other part is English.

        • Tamm
          Tamm
          September 27, 2011 at 2:39 am | #

          An English tree shrew.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            September 27, 2011 at 11:36 pm | #

            Are you sure that it isn’t an African or European tree shrew.

            • Icalasari
              Icalasari
              September 28, 2011 at 10:32 pm | #

              Depends on the air speed velocity

              …Well, I’m SURE that would matter if you loaded them in a catapult…

    • wandering meme
      wandering meme
      September 27, 2011 at 9:47 am | #

      “And later tonight on ‘campus news network’, an underaged college student attended a frat party and had her liver explode out of her sides simultaneously! Fratboy says, ‘a miracle and a tragedy! a miragedy!’ film at 11.”

    • Another Commenter
      Another Commenter
      September 27, 2011 at 2:10 pm | #

      Maybe… it’s because she’s Amazigirl!

      Or Ultra-Car, I’m good either way.

      • Mally
        Mally
        July 22, 2015 at 4:32 am | #

        Billie is Ultra-Car? Well, that just makes my fan-fic awkward.

  3. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    September 27, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    What the- Where did she get the kegs and how is she able to lift them? 0.o

    • Cha
      Cha
      September 27, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

      She’s a CHEERLEADER duhhhh.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        September 27, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

        Do you know how much a full keg wieghs?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

          Almost enough to make Billie tipsy.

          • wandering meme
            wandering meme
            September 27, 2011 at 9:49 am | #

            good job billie! but remember: balance! don’t overdo it!

            • wandering meme
              wandering meme
              September 27, 2011 at 9:59 am | #

              chug, chug, pass, billie. chug, chug, pass.

        • Chiatroll
          Chiatroll
          September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

          These are minikegs though. Like the green heineken ones. Either that or she is a giant. It’snot to bad to hold three of those. Especially at the rate she will empty them.

        • iSaidCandleja-
          iSaidCandleja-
          September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

          Slightly less than Billie’s jugs?

        • NakedDumblydore
          NakedDumblydore
          September 27, 2011 at 12:28 am | #

          This is Billie we’re talking about. Those kegs are already nearly empty.

        • skavensrule
          skavensrule
          September 27, 2011 at 12:43 am | #

          Those look like mini-kegs so she is carrying about 60 pounds +/-, easily possible. Of course knowing Billie as we do, about thirty of those pounds are inside her by now.

        • Random Webcomics Junkie
          Random Webcomics Junkie
          September 27, 2011 at 6:05 pm | #

          You’re assuming they were full for longer than five seconds.

  4. Cha
    Cha
    September 27, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    This can only mean Joyce doing something dumb…I hope/fear.

    • Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
      Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
      September 27, 2011 at 12:22 am | #

      Her doing so at this point would only make the party that much better.

  5. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    September 27, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    At any given moment, how much of Billie’s body mass would you say is beer?

    • dchorror
      dchorror
      September 27, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

      180%. I know it’s not possible. I’m still sticking by that number.

      • GinzaMary
        GinzaMary
        September 27, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

        I think you mean 360 proof.

        • dchorror
          dchorror
          September 27, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

          I don’t know how to do proof. Not a heavy drinker.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          September 27, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

          IIRC, the proof number is double the percentage, eg: 30% alcohol content = 60 proof.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 27, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

        Her blood alcohol may end up being 180 proof before the end of the night.

        • Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
          Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
          September 27, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

          No kidding! Could you imagine the cops reaction to it if they arrested her and tested her blood alcohol level? They’d probably pass out at the number! Allowing her to go free. Scientists would sure have a field day studying this unusual phenomenon.

          • George
            George
            September 27, 2011 at 12:23 am | #

            They’d probably just assume their breathalyzer was broken, since your blood only has to be 0.5% alcohol to kill you and Billie looks like she’s going to push 1.0%. BECAUSE THAT IS HOW HARD SHE PARTIES.

            • GinzaMary
              GinzaMary
              September 27, 2011 at 12:33 am | #

              Yeah, I think Billie may have transcended the norm of average drunk college party girl and entered that strange and other-worldly state of drunkenness that can only be described as… AUSTRALIAN DRUNK! That state in which, no matter where you are in the world, by the end of the night you will be punched in the face by a kangaroo.

              • Rowen Morland
                Rowen Morland
                September 27, 2011 at 1:55 am | #

                That would be a wonderful end to this sequence.

              • TheBenenator
                TheBenenator
                September 27, 2011 at 3:50 am | #

                “you will be punched in the FAAAAAAACE”

                Fixed it for you. For a nickel.

                • eagalian
                  eagalian
                  September 27, 2011 at 1:02 pm | #

                  with your penis?

              • Doctor_Who
                Doctor_Who
                September 27, 2011 at 5:28 pm | #

                Mike. In a kangaroo costume. Willis, make this happen. 😉

  6. andr3wtime
    andr3wtime
    September 27, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    That is some extremely minimalistic modern art on the wall there.

    • Khrene Cleaver
      Khrene Cleaver
      September 27, 2011 at 3:07 pm | #

      Yeah those are the works of Evian Scameu Ripweil. Her blank artwork says volumes, and are worth of 75,000 dollars each.

  7. MM
    MM
    September 27, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    If I were Joyce, I think my expression would’ve been reversed in those panels. “Here I am, hanging out by the closet alone…but at least I’m not going to be passing out in another five minutes.”

    • Kaci
      Kaci
      September 27, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

      yeah what I was wondering!

    • Sporkaganza
      Sporkaganza
      September 27, 2011 at 2:37 am | #

      To me her expression in the last panel looked contemptuous. I could be just me, though.

      • Kirt Dankmyer
        Kirt Dankmyer
        September 27, 2011 at 10:04 am | #

        Seems more angry to me.

        • Despite Rage
          Despite Rage
          September 27, 2011 at 10:45 am | #

          I thought it was determined, as in determined not to turn into Billy.

    • wandering meme
      wandering meme
      September 27, 2011 at 9:54 am | #

      way to go Joyce! Already past the 20 minute mark, and no one noticed its rape O’clock yet!

      • Khrene Cleaver
        Khrene Cleaver
        September 27, 2011 at 3:10 pm | #

        Rape is a no go Joe bro. Man its one thing if a girl is off her shit FAAAACCCCED but if she says no, I let her go. But its okay she knows what shes missing and she come running back only to now she has to wait in the headline.

  8. Kaci
    Kaci
    September 27, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    Why does she sound so annoyed there? I mean, in comparison to the other alternative, alone next to a closet isn’t bad.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

      Maybe just maybe, Joyce wanted to have fun at the party, but due to the fact that no one said hi back to her, she got served Sierra Mist instead of Sprite and that Billie is making a complete ass of herself, the party is starting to disappoint hersomewhat.

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      September 27, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      She’s annoyed at Billie.

    • Valdrax
      Valdrax
      September 27, 2011 at 3:47 pm | #

      C) All of the above.

  9. The Sound Defense
    The Sound Defense
    September 27, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    Out of the ten warning signs of alcoholism, Billie displays about seven hundred.

    • Vivvav
      Vivvav
      September 27, 2011 at 12:32 am | #

      I know. What a lightweight.

  10. Jimmy
    Jimmy
    September 27, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    Joyce is like me at every party I ever go to.

  11. NCP19
    NCP19
    September 27, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

    Billie looks like the female (and somehow more drunk) version of Iron Man to me.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      September 27, 2011 at 2:53 am | #

      Does that mean she’s gonna build a metal suit IN A CAVE!? WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!?

      • GinzaMary
        GinzaMary
        September 27, 2011 at 3:14 am | #

        Not unless Joe shows up, she taps out on about 3 more kegstands, for some reason has a teddy on her, and they manage to score so plutonium at 4am. If all that happens…

        Joe: “Best. Party. EVER!”

        • ryan
          ryan
          September 27, 2011 at 8:43 am | #

          what if she just trips into a pile of empty kegs, and through the miracle of science punchlines ends up wearing them?

        • lightsabermario
          lightsabermario
          September 27, 2011 at 4:15 pm | #

          Who knows? They can always get some plutonium from the Libyans!

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            September 27, 2011 at 6:25 pm | #

            Billie is trying to run at 88mph so she can go back to a time when she was popular.

  12. Platypus
    Platypus
    September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

    Shaggy is in the backround, kinda.

  13. dchorror
    dchorror
    September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

    Hanging out by the closet seems like too much of an easy joke.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 12:31 am | #

      At least she isn’t IN the closet.

      • GinzaMary
        GinzaMary
        September 27, 2011 at 12:46 am | #

        Hey now, we don’t want to discourage her from interesting new character development. 😀

        • dchorror
          dchorror
          September 27, 2011 at 2:41 am | #

          Yeah, we don’t know that and given Willis’ track record…

          • Wix
            Wix
            September 27, 2011 at 5:05 am | #

            Willis is by far one of the most… How to put it… Out of the blue right hooks you’ll ever find when it comes to writing.

            • GinzaMary
              GinzaMary
              September 27, 2011 at 7:10 am | #

              I was just joking around, but I have to admit DoA Joyce being gay would be kind of awesome. Not just as a yuri fan girl Squee thing either. I always thought some of the funniest Walkyverse Joyce moments were when her sexuality is questioned. To this day I think the funniest thing Willis ever did was when Joyce’s parents gave her the “it’s okay that you’re gay” speech the first time she brought Walky to meet them.

              • R
                R
                September 27, 2011 at 9:59 am | #

                I loved Joyce’s parents in the other Walkyverse (or is it the Walkyverse). They didn’t mean to turn out a little husband-crazy bible thumper, they were just trying to insure their baby girl didn’t get knocked up in college like mom did (which could’ve been done with DP shots, but w/e).
                I hope we get to know them more in this incarnation.

                • begbert2
                  begbert2
                  September 27, 2011 at 9:33 pm | #

                  Odds are good they’re very, very different this time around.

      • Rognik
        Rognik
        September 28, 2011 at 3:36 pm | #

        Well, if she was in the closet with the right person, she might enjoy it. After all, it’s called “7 minutes in HEAVEN”.

  14. TheAlucinaut
    TheAlucinaut
    September 27, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

    S’all about context.

  15. Conuzor
    Conuzor
    September 27, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

    Go Billie go! YOU KAN DOO EET!

  16. Wackd
    Wackd
    September 27, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

    I took one look at Billie and thought “Donkey Kong”. Those kegs look way too much like barrels.

    • Joraiem
      Joraiem
      September 27, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

      Why exactly is Joyce staying by the closet alone? It’s not like she was lacking in friendliness before. Or has she already introduced herself to everyone there?

      • Joraiem
        Joraiem
        September 27, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

        Oops accidentally posted it in the wrong spot. Incidentally, she should totally throw the kegs at Dorothy and carry Roz up a ladder.

        • George
          George
          September 27, 2011 at 12:26 am | #

          Better yet, empty the kegs, grab Joyce, climb a half-finished building, drunk dial Walky, and throw the kegs at him when he tries to get them down.

          • cmglothlin
            cmglothlin
            September 27, 2011 at 12:29 am | #

            I also have the same avatar. And drinking and stuff.

            • Bickendan
              Bickendan
              September 27, 2011 at 12:57 am | #

              Not drinking and stuff here.

              • cmglothlin
                cmglothlin
                September 27, 2011 at 11:04 pm | #

                Awesome. I’ll bring Sprite and Chex Mix

  17. lawzlo
    lawzlo
    September 27, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

    Thanks to Shortpacked, I can’t see a closet in a Willis comic without wondering who’s in it…

    Could it be a certain congresswoman?

  18. mnk
    mnk
    September 27, 2011 at 12:18 am | #

    Joyce is reminding me a lot of Joe Cool here.

    “Here’s Joyce Cool, hanging around the student union…”

  19. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 27, 2011 at 12:25 am | #

    Billie: The only woman alive whose urine is a high level fire safety hazard.

    • Shifty
      Shifty
      September 27, 2011 at 4:21 am | #

      What about Courtney Love?

    • lightsabermario
      lightsabermario
      September 27, 2011 at 4:18 pm | #

      What about Lindsey Lohan?

    • Spazman
      Spazman
      September 27, 2011 at 9:56 pm | #

      Is Willis going to make a Farscape/DoA fiery pissing contest?

      Rigel vs. Billie…..

      😀

  20. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    September 27, 2011 at 12:35 am | #

    Billie just looks so desperate to drink more. I mean, look at those eyes!

  21. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 27, 2011 at 12:35 am | #

    I can only hope that Roz can make this party more interesting.

    • wandering meme
      wandering meme
      September 27, 2011 at 9:51 am | #

      now that you mention it, how come Roz isn’t dressed like a slut?!?!? (especially after she suggested it?)

      • Valdrax
        Valdrax
        September 27, 2011 at 3:51 pm | #

        Technically, all she said was that Dorothy couldn’t dress like she normally does. Dorothy and Roz are currently wearing about the same level of casual clothing, so I don’t see the problem.

  22. ScytheAkse
    ScytheAkse
    September 27, 2011 at 12:42 am | #

    sitting alone by the closet seems the correct place for the nonworld-ly lil christian girl at a college party fueled by alcohol.

  23. huh
    huh
    September 27, 2011 at 12:49 am | #

    A girl standing along in the corner of a party? This sounds like a job for drunk frat guy.

  24. Daeva
    Daeva
    September 27, 2011 at 12:51 am | #

    -inserts passing train whistle sound effect in panel three-

  25. Ravux
    Ravux
    September 27, 2011 at 1:06 am | #

    Oh…. I can totally see what’s going to happen next. Probably. Ahem, PREMARITAL HANKY PANKY, coming out of the closet.

    • wandering meme
      wandering meme
      September 27, 2011 at 9:52 am | #

      Premarital Hanky Panky with Nether defiling little dickmonsters, posted on the world wide web!

  26. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 27, 2011 at 1:38 am | #

    It’s a sin for a pretty girl with impressive sweater pups to be by herself at a party.

  27. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 27, 2011 at 1:39 am | #

    What on earth is up with the posts, they are not posting where they are supposed to be for some reason.

    • CWR
      CWR
      September 27, 2011 at 4:12 am | #

      Sweater pups are welcome everywhere.

      Even here.

    • HeartlessHealer
      HeartlessHealer
      September 27, 2011 at 6:04 am | #

      It’s probably because your crazed Hannelore icon is upsetting the site. :p

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 27, 2011 at 6:30 pm | #

        Who would have guessed that Hannelore’s rapeface can break even the internet.

  28. Doom Shepherd
    Doom Shepherd
    September 27, 2011 at 1:51 am | #

    Billie’s shirt is back on. How often do people put clothes BACK ON when they’re drunk??

    It’s a trap!

  29. Azukar
    Azukar
    September 27, 2011 at 2:31 am | #

    Bizarrely, the thing that first struck me is that Roz is in the same clothes she was in during the day. I guess, to her, life’s all one big party?

    (What is wrong with me…)

    • ryan
      ryan
      September 27, 2011 at 8:49 am | #

      she told dorothy to change. doesn’t mean roz herself needed to.

  30. KresyAntics
    KresyAntics
    September 27, 2011 at 2:48 am | #

    Roz didn’t even change clothes for the party…lame. Now on a serious note 2 thumbs up for drunk party girls!

    • Joebo
      Joebo
      September 27, 2011 at 7:11 pm | #

      No.

      • Jack
        Jack
        September 27, 2011 at 10:14 pm | #

        This post, coupled with this gravatar, won an internet for Joebo.

  31. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    September 27, 2011 at 2:56 am | #

    Wow…Y’know, if Billie dies, she’s probably consumed enough alcohol to preserve her body for thousands of years.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 27, 2011 at 6:31 pm | #

      Pickling is a traditional way to preserve things after all.

  32. Daeva
    Daeva
    September 27, 2011 at 3:13 am | #

    Okay, I just realized something. Billie is drunk off her ass, and yet she can STILL maintain the level of coordination needed to balance a keg on your head while running.

    Gotta give a girl props…

  33. Timothy
    Timothy
    September 27, 2011 at 3:32 am | #

    Nice snark from Joyce there.

  34. JTSkibbles
    JTSkibbles
    September 27, 2011 at 3:37 am | #

    There’s probably a few somebodies in the closet.

  35. Lee
    Lee
    September 27, 2011 at 3:39 am | #

    Jesus Christ, Billie

    • ryan
      ryan
      September 27, 2011 at 8:50 am | #

      best comment today.

  36. Shifty
    Shifty
    September 27, 2011 at 4:22 am | #

    Gee, I don’t know why anyone would ever think Billie has a drinking problem…

    • calendarman27
      calendarman27
      September 27, 2011 at 9:55 am | #

      She doesn’t, she seems to have it down to a science

  37. stikibunn
    stikibunn
    September 27, 2011 at 4:33 am | #

    David Mitchell (Who like all english people personally knows the Queen) would like me to point out that “Hold down the fort” is an incorrect statement. The correct phrase is “Hold the Fort” not “Hold Down the Fort” If I ask you to “Hold the Fort” the metaphor I am employing is perfectly clear. You and I are in the fort together, holding out against the enemies of the fort, who are besieging the fort.
    I now have to pop out of the fort for a bit to get some printer toner or take the cat to the vet.
    While I do do this, (Don’t worry about how I get past the besieging enemy I have a secret tunnel and a false beard) while I do this I want you to “Hold the Fort” so when I return we both still have “the Fort…”
    A perfectly reasonable metaphor embodying a sound military strategy.

    If I ask you to “Hold down the fort” what the hell am I talking about? “Hold down the fort because when I go you out… it’s.. an inflatable hover fort and once relieved of my weight it might float off into the sky.”
    “Hold down the fort and when I get back the two of can tickle the fort…” no. meaningless… stop it.

    http://youtu.be/om7O0MFkmpw

    • Azukar
      Azukar
      September 27, 2011 at 5:58 am | #

      I don’t think Dorothy is that worried. She’s got more on her mind.

    • ryan
      ryan
      September 27, 2011 at 8:52 am | #

      language, much like those pokey men, tends to evolve.

  38. Wix
    Wix
    September 27, 2011 at 5:06 am | #

    Now -that- is a true style party girl. Seriously, -that- much liquor and she still has the balance to carry a keg on her HEAD without getting any on her. The woman is a force of nature soaked to the boan in alcohol.

    • TsunamiJane
      TsunamiJane
      September 27, 2011 at 11:54 am | #

      soaked to the femurs

      • Izzy
        Izzy
        September 27, 2011 at 3:35 pm | #

        with her pe-….
        For a nickle

  39. Björn
    Björn
    September 27, 2011 at 6:51 am | #

    I find Billie’s behaviour unbillievable.

    • ryan
      ryan
      September 27, 2011 at 8:53 am | #

      i have no joyce but to agree with you.

      • KEViN
        KEViN
        September 27, 2011 at 1:15 pm | #

        I roz going to post something clever here, but I couldn’t think of anything.

      • Izzy
        Izzy
        September 27, 2011 at 2:04 pm | #

        I’m just gonna walky on outta here and let you all hate on my mastery of bad, name related puns

        • lightsabermario
          lightsabermario
          September 27, 2011 at 4:28 pm | #

          Andanny hope of this meme stopping is mikeroscopic. What? It was a joeke!

          • fellixe
            fellixe
            September 27, 2011 at 10:55 pm | #

            I’m Dina hear what else you have.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              September 27, 2011 at 11:23 pm | #

              Memes like me make me wanna rejoyce for humanity.

  40. zsquaredagain
    zsquaredagain
    September 27, 2011 at 8:23 am | #

    Clearly, Billie aspires to find out what comes after “super-drunk”….for science.

    • fellixe
      fellixe
      September 27, 2011 at 1:58 pm | #

      It is inspiring how deeply devoted she is to quantumdrunk science.

    • Jack
      Jack
      September 27, 2011 at 10:08 pm | #

      Vomit and a hangover.

  41. goatman95111
    goatman95111
    September 27, 2011 at 10:45 am | #

    I wonder how many kegger push-ups Billie can do. After all, she was a cheerleader.

  42. Name
    Name
    September 27, 2011 at 11:44 am | #

    Does anyone else think Joyce should grow up and try to talk to new people without lecturing them or their immorality? I don’t feel sorry for her when she’s “alone” in a room full of people.

    • Random Webcomics Junkie
      Random Webcomics Junkie
      September 27, 2011 at 6:02 pm | #

      No one who’s been paying attention, anyway. Please see: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/06-yesterday-was-thursday/predrunk/

      Joyce HAS been talking to new people with nary a lecture. Dotty asked her to wait there and there’s no one nearby to talk to, so Joyce is “alone.” Billie walks past looking ridiculous and way, way past drunk. Joyce understandably doesn’t want to try to strike up with a conversation with her while she’s like that. (Even if Billie would allow it, which she probably wouldn’t, as she seems to have come to this party for reasons other than talking to Joyce.)

      So: she’s tried striking up conversations and probably will again when someone non-Billie walks near enough or when she’s done waiting there for Dotty as she promised. She hasn’t lectured anyone yet – although she has expressed shock (reasonably) that Billie is stone drunk no more than five minutes after arriving at the party.

      Joyce is actually behaving very, very well considering this is probably the first party she has ever attended where alcohol is involved and board games are not, and sex with someone you meet there is actually possible.

  43. Bill M.
    Bill M.
    September 27, 2011 at 1:13 pm | #

    Okay, we finally have proof. With those mini-kegs, it’s obvious now that Billie’s liver no longer takes alcohol out of her system, she now is a distillery. Even after drinking regular water, her excreted bodily fluids have the same alcohol content as beer.

  44. Tobias
    Tobias
    September 27, 2011 at 3:24 pm | #

    Poor Joyce. I never attended a frat party in college, but if I had I’d probably be in her exact situation.

    See, she shoulda brought the Apples to Apples after all!

  45. artemi
    artemi
    September 27, 2011 at 3:58 pm | #

    By god Billie, you are AMAZING.

  46. Joebo
    Joebo
    September 27, 2011 at 7:02 pm | #

    Honestly, if I were at this party and saw Billie I would either A) try to get her kicked out or B) just leave if A proved impossible. Also, if this were my party I would just plain kick Billie out, no A or B required.

  47. MarcinMN
    MarcinMN
    September 27, 2011 at 8:33 pm | #

    Don’t feel bad, Joyce. When I was in college, I didn’t even *get* to the parties in order to hang out by the closet. 😉

  48. Sir Robin
    Sir Robin
    September 27, 2011 at 9:05 pm | #

    I hope someone comes over to talk to Joyce … I’m guessing Faz

  49. Locke
    Locke
    September 27, 2011 at 9:37 pm | #

    You’re not alone, Joyce! After all, there’s probably a couple of partygoers messing around inside that closet.

  50. Culwecth
    Culwecth
    September 27, 2011 at 9:41 pm | #

    The reason Billie’s got three kegs is so she can keep upright. They’re acting as counterweights.

  51. TheProfessor529
    TheProfessor529
    September 27, 2011 at 10:34 pm | #

    Nice Velma sweater, Joyce

  52. TheDoctor
    TheDoctor
    September 27, 2011 at 11:05 pm | #

    I think I prefer Joyce in the vest. Either way she’s too sweet for this kind of party….unless she bumps into Walky.

  53. mr speck
    mr speck
    September 27, 2011 at 11:54 pm | #

    so is ron the guy in the green jacket?

  54. Richie9999
    Richie9999
    September 29, 2011 at 12:46 pm | #

    Billie takes her drinking VERY seriously.

  55. Zar Kane
    Zar Kane
    May 5, 2012 at 6:44 pm | #

    Ok, where’s Ron in this one?

    • Andrusi
      Andrusi
      September 7, 2012 at 3:22 pm | #

      Part of his arm is in panels 1 and 3.

  56. SgtNumnum
    SgtNumnum
    November 7, 2013 at 5:11 pm | #

    If things keep going like this, Billie’s gonna end up dying of liver failiure, and Joyce is gonna get the sh*t beat out of her for saying “I told you so” at the funeral

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