Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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joe really really likes turning people's names into verbs
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July 9, 2026

Dan

by David M Willis on June 9, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 03 - Answers in Hennessy

└ Tags: danny, jacob, joe

Discussion (150) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. TurtlyLooker
    TurtlyLooker
    June 9, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    They are the most married.

    • robdeweese
      robdeweese
      June 9, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      is that recognized in the state of Indiana? or are they just the most civil unioned?

      • TurtlyLooker
        TurtlyLooker
        June 9, 2013 at 4:01 pm | #

        Civil-union-ed, I suppose.
        Civil-united?
        Trying to say it just makes it sound and feel really awkward.

        • Narf
          Narf
          June 9, 2013 at 5:02 pm | #

          Civily(lly?) united!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 9, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Someone will be sleeping on the couch tonight.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 9, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

        If I had a roomate I’d sleep on the couch too. Couches are comfortable.

        • Wonder Wig
          Wonder Wig
          June 9, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

          If I had a couch I’d sleep on my roomate. Roomates are comfortable.

          • Skull025
            Skull025
            June 9, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

            If I had a mate I’d sleep on my room. Rooms are comfortable.

            • TPman
              TPman
              June 9, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

              If I had a room I would mate on my couch.

              • ninja_jesus
                ninja_jesus
                June 9, 2013 at 2:36 am | #

                If I had a couch I would room on my mate.

                • Rex Hondo
                  Rex Hondo
                  June 9, 2013 at 4:43 am | #

                  If my room had a couch, my mate and I would Joe on it.

                • Totz the Plaid
                  Totz the Plaid
                  June 9, 2013 at 6:08 am | #

                  If my mate had a room I would couch on the sleep.

                • Insanely Asinine
                  Insanely Asinine
                  June 9, 2013 at 6:56 am | #

                  I joe you guys.

                • Rex Hondo
                  Rex Hondo
                  June 9, 2013 at 10:08 am | #

                  Not without buying us dinner first, you don’t!

                • Ivan
                  Ivan
                  June 9, 2013 at 5:25 pm | #

                  If I had a handful of nickels, I’d do all your Mom’s on the couch in the room while your ‘mate got it on video!

                • Tandel
                  Tandel
                  June 10, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

                  Alright folks pack it up. Great work and kudos on the fact delivery!

                  /thread

              • Jenny Creed
                Jenny Creed
                July 27, 2013 at 4:18 pm | #

                If I had a mate I would couch on my room. Whilst asleep on the wheel. On the ship. Because he’s a ship’s mate.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            June 9, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

            Especially the rounder ones.

          • bunivasal
            bunivasal
            June 9, 2013 at 4:50 am | #

            Mine wasn’t. She was all angular in the elbows and knees, plus if I ever tried to sleep on her there’d be the constant beatings from my girlfriend.

            • vlademir1
              vlademir1
              June 9, 2013 at 12:36 pm | #

              Well, obviously you should have slept oh the roommate together.

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      June 9, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

      It’s just Guy Love. Between two guys!

      • Tom Speelman
        Tom Speelman
        June 9, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

        Guy Love: He’s mine; I’m his!

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          June 9, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

          There’s nothing gay about it in our eyes.

          • Notebooked
            Notebooked
            June 9, 2013 at 6:05 am | #

            You ask me ’bout this thing we share, and he tenderly replies,
            it’s guy love! Between two guys…

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        June 9, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

        “Two buff guys standing side by side. That’s all. What? What’s the problem?”

        • BlueHoundoom
          BlueHoundoom
          June 9, 2013 at 5:32 am | #

          Iseewhatyoudidthar…

  2. SUGauthor
    SUGauthor
    June 9, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    That was rather rude of Joe.

  3. Kartewns
    Kartewns
    June 9, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    They’re practically engaged, Jacob.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      Sounds like a step down, really.

  4. Geminia999
    Geminia999
    June 9, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Man, my friend always Dan a relationship. Weird how his name is Joe.

    • TPman
      TPman
      June 9, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      Please tell me your name is Dan and that you’re a total man-whore. Please.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 9, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

        And that your friend Joyce is a lesbian who’s trying to make her relation ship work with a bible thumping dude named Ethan….
        Actually no. Don’t tell us if that happens.

        • Geminia999
          Geminia999
          June 9, 2013 at 12:38 am | #

          Nah, but my friend Billie is extremely depressed right now and is drinking a lot of booze. Luckily Ruth is there to try and help her out right, with more booze… I should go check on them.

        • Raen
          Raen
          June 9, 2013 at 1:56 am | #

          …Joyce is a lesbian now? Little premature on that, don’t you think?

          • Raen
            Raen
            June 9, 2013 at 1:58 am | #

            …wait, never mind.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            June 9, 2013 at 1:58 am | #

            It’s not if you read everything before that :3.

  5. Khantalas
    Khantalas
    June 9, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    So which one is Turk and which one is J.D.?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      As if you have to ask.

      • robdeweese
        robdeweese
        June 9, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

        does that mean ruth is Dr. Cox?

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          June 9, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

          Then Billie’d be Jordan.
          Would amber be Elliot?

          • bunivasal
            bunivasal
            June 9, 2013 at 4:48 am | #

            Elliot’s more like Joyce. Desperate to please and wracked with WASPy nueroses.

            • Notebooked
              Notebooked
              June 9, 2013 at 6:12 am | #

              Mike is the Janitor, obviously.

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        June 9, 2013 at 12:58 am | #

        I do!

    • Justnobody
      Justnobody
      June 9, 2013 at 12:34 am | #

      And now I re-read the comic in Turk and J.D.’s voices, making it 100% better. Thank you, kind sir.

      • Totz the Plaid
        Totz the Plaid
        June 9, 2013 at 6:12 am | #

        So did I. I wasn’t sure whose voice to read Jacob’s line in, but eventually I settled on Dr. Kelso.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          June 9, 2013 at 5:29 pm | #

          I re-read it using the voices in my head. All I kept hearing was “Just kill them! Kill them and eat their livers!”

          Does that change the outcome at all?

  6. Stephen
    Stephen
    June 9, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Mawage, that bwessed awangement, that dweam wifin a dweam.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      June 9, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      Then wove, twue wove, will fowwow you fowevah.

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        June 9, 2013 at 4:44 am | #

        Anybody want a peanut?

        • Narf
          Narf
          June 9, 2013 at 5:00 pm | #

          Inconceivable!

          • Kernanator
            Kernanator
            June 10, 2013 at 11:28 am | #

            You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

            • Narf
              Narf
              June 26, 2013 at 1:23 am | #

              YES!!! 😀 OMG YES!

              Kern, I love you so much. 😀

  7. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    June 9, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    I hope that when I have a relationship, I will never Dan it into the ground.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      But I hope we Joe it up regularly.

      • TPman
        TPman
        June 9, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

        As long as you don’t Joe the relationship. Joe-ing in general is a positive thing, but a relationship that’s been Joe’d never lasts long.

    • NaptownSnake
      NaptownSnake
      June 9, 2013 at 3:07 am | #

      Aren’t you like 50?

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        June 9, 2013 at 5:11 am | #

        YES. Sure the odds are rather low but if 70 and 80 somethings can find love, then there is a small chance that I won’t have to die a bachelor.

      • Andiemus
        Andiemus
        June 9, 2013 at 4:00 pm | #

        Never ask a mongoose its age!

      • Ivan
        Ivan
        June 9, 2013 at 5:32 pm | #

        Do you have any idea how easy women are after 35? Where do you think that joke about “the difference between dog poop and….” came from?

        The women are easier to pick up!!

  8. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    June 9, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Since 1997, Buddy.

  9. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    June 9, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    Cue speculation as to what other names-as-verbs would be.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      Joycing someone would involve annoying them to no end and then scaring them off with your misguided view of how the world works.

    • TPman
      TPman
      June 9, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

      Dorothy – To focus all of one’s efforts on a single thing to the neglect of other aspects of one’s life.
      ex. Man Joe was always a man-whore, but now he’s just Dorothying it.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

      Sarahing would involve never bothering to meet that person, but assuming they suck and hold that against them.

      • TPman
        TPman
        June 9, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        ex. Danny Sarahs M.Night.Shyamalan because his movies suck, unaware that he is a really nice guy who just likes to kick back and try to get a laugh out of the people who read the comments section on webcomics.

    • TPman
      TPman
      June 9, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      Joyce, verb- To recount or proselytize one’s own views in order to reaffirm them in your own mind.
      ex. To this day my little brother Joyces that the Star Wars prequels are better than the original films.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 9, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      Name/Meaning
      Joe = Sexing up
      Dan = Grinding down
      Ethan = Hide, conceal
      Dina = To show up unexpectedly

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        June 9, 2013 at 3:18 am | #

        All of which are totally usable in a sexual context.

    • Lurlock
      Lurlock
      June 9, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      Dinaing is just the act of randomly appearing in a room (or having silently been there the entire time) while everybody assumed you were across town or something.

      • Lurlock
        Lurlock
        June 9, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

        Gah, beaten by 1 minute…

        • Beige
          Beige
          June 9, 2013 at 9:41 am | #

          your comment got dina’d 😉

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 9, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

        Ex. I was coming out of the bathroom when suddenly My roomate dina’d me. I thought she was getting her nails done!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

      Billie: When you are very attractive, and seem like you’ve sealed the deal, but either by fault of your own or someone else you fail to make a connection at the last minute.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        June 9, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

        Sierra = Going barefoot

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          June 9, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

          Ex. When I’m home I just Sierra all day. Air the dogs out.

    • Wonder Wig
      Wonder Wig
      June 9, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

      To Walky, is to walk to Taco Bell instead of drive because all members in your party are unillegible to do so for any reason.

      • Ivan
        Ivan
        June 9, 2013 at 5:36 pm | #

        >> “unillegible”

        Better define that one too!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:25 am | #

      Mike: To ruin someones day just for the hell of it.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        June 9, 2013 at 12:29 am | #

        My day was well and truly miked… yeah that works well.

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        June 9, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

        If this does not become commonly used, I will be sad.

      • TPman
        TPman
        June 9, 2013 at 12:51 am | #

        When I get mad some times I take it out on other people and Mike the hell out of them.

      • Lurlock
        Lurlock
        June 9, 2013 at 7:56 am | #

        I’d think that Miking would involve Joeing someone’s mother. For a nickel, etc.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          June 9, 2013 at 5:37 pm | #

          Getting or giving the nickel? This is important, for it defines man-whoring vs. Man-Whoring!!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

      Jason: To wear one accessory with all of your outfits, so much so that you’re defined by it.
      ex. Wow, you’ve worn that hat every day for three weeks now! Are you trying to jason it in?

    • spaceinvader42
      spaceinvader42
      June 9, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

      Of course, to Sal would be to enter a room through the window.

    • spaceinvader42
      spaceinvader42
      June 9, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

      To Amber would be to secretly dress up as a superhero and fight crime.

      • Tom Speelman
        Tom Speelman
        June 9, 2013 at 12:38 am | #

        To Amber would also mean staying up all night on the Internet reading slash fic.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          June 9, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

          I think we’ve all ambered at least once or twice.

          • vsophi
            vsophi
            June 9, 2013 at 1:13 am | #

            Followed by a frantic ethaning when somebody walks into the room.

      • Davriel
        Davriel
        June 9, 2013 at 1:55 am | #

        Wouldn’t that be to Sal?

        • Davriel
          Davriel
          June 9, 2013 at 1:56 am | #

          Or would that be to exit through a window?

    • AgentKeen
      AgentKeen
      June 9, 2013 at 12:51 am | #

      So would Mary mean to not put clothes on until late afternoon, or to be extremely judgmental of anyone that doesn’t share your view?

      Or should it be super specific and mean to be extremely judgmental of anyone that doesn’t share your view while not putting clothes on until late afternoon?

    • AgentKeen
      AgentKeen
      June 9, 2013 at 12:53 am | #

      Galasso: to plot world domination while running a mildly successful local business

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 9, 2013 at 12:56 am | #

        See Also: Mcdonalds.

    • Notebooked
      Notebooked
      June 9, 2013 at 6:16 am | #

      Joeing: Man, you don’t even wanna know.

      Ethan: To ignore something and hope it goes away.
      Ex: “My sink’s dripping, but I’m Ethaning it. It’s not worth the bother.”

      • Ivan
        Ivan
        June 9, 2013 at 5:42 pm | #

        “My sink is dripping, but it’s very embarrassed about that reality. And you should see it “Ethan” the next morning, after the plumber uses his snake!”

        (I’ll leave the plumber ‘butt-crack’ lines for the next person!)

  10. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    June 9, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    There’s a green wig on the floor. A clue…

    • Geminia999
      Geminia999
      June 9, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      It isn’t a wig silly! It’s a buried Lemming!

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      June 9, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      But where’s the blue paw print?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 9, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

      So the culprit had to be a COSPLAYER, of course!!!

  11. xain
    xain
    June 9, 2013 at 12:25 am | #

    Can’t you see Danny, Joe’s a manwhore for your sake

    • Ivan
      Ivan
      June 9, 2013 at 5:46 pm | #

      Joe will die during a manwhoring, as a sacrifice for Joyce and the rest of the fundies who deny him!

      And on the 3rd day, his zombie corpse, with some help from Viagra, will rise! to do some more, and cleanse the masses from the urethra of —-

      (sorry…. I ran out of bad ideas on this one.)

  12. gangler
    gangler
    June 9, 2013 at 12:48 am | #

    If by positive energy you mean reporters.

  13. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    June 9, 2013 at 1:19 am | #

    Good thing Joe gathers that positive energy. It’s how they fight off the undead!

    • Historyman68
      Historyman68
      June 9, 2013 at 1:34 am | #

      You can really see all the positive energy in action.

    • nothri
      nothri
      June 10, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      Only in third edition.

  14. ArkhamTexan
    ArkhamTexan
    June 9, 2013 at 1:22 am | #

    Dammit, I just love Joe. He’s definitely my favorite.

    • Chibi Squirt
      Chibi Squirt
      June 9, 2013 at 6:46 pm | #

      I, too, love Joe, and I would be 100% with you, if only it weren’t for Jacob. HE is DEFINITELY my favorite.

      Look at his face! His wee little face up there!

  15. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    June 9, 2013 at 1:40 am | #

    Interesting strip. The comments were pretty clever tonight. Love the verbage.

  16. AsimovSideburns
    AsimovSideburns
    June 9, 2013 at 2:04 am | #

    I’m waiting for Ethan to see this, assume Danny and Joe are bisexual, and then try to ask one of them out after his relationship with Joyce breaks down.

  17. ninja_jesus
    ninja_jesus
    June 9, 2013 at 2:38 am | #

    So will “Dan” now be considered a verb as well as a noun?

  18. Jesse
    Jesse
    June 9, 2013 at 2:55 am | #

    Sneaky Scrubs reference?

    • Khantalas
      Khantalas
      June 9, 2013 at 5:50 am | #

      Sneaky?

      • Boom
        Boom
        June 9, 2013 at 7:13 am | #

        Scrubs?

        • Khantalas
          Khantalas
          June 9, 2013 at 7:18 am | #

          Reference?

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            June 9, 2013 at 12:07 pm | #

            ??

            • Chronos
              Chronos
              June 9, 2013 at 2:31 pm | #

              !

              • Ivan
                Ivan
                June 9, 2013 at 5:48 pm | #

                ¿

              • Jesse
                Jesse
                June 10, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

                http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNJ1B_2b17s

  19. Rex Hondo
    Rex Hondo
    June 9, 2013 at 3:21 am | #

    And by “positive energy,” he means “sex stank.”

  20. Robin
    Robin
    June 9, 2013 at 3:33 am | #

    joe really really likes turning people’s names into verbs

    I would suggest calling “turning people’s names into verbs” joe-ing, but no doubt he already has another meaning for “joe-ing”.

    • someguywithakatana
      someguywithakatana
      June 9, 2013 at 4:02 am | #

      that’s actually come up once or twice in the other comic. Maybe in this one. I forget.

      Can someone with an obsessive fixation on Willis link every single comic where Joe has used the term “Joe-ing”

      • Notebooked
        Notebooked
        June 9, 2013 at 6:39 am | #

        None in book 1, at least!

    • molochmachine
      molochmachine
      June 9, 2013 at 6:37 am | #

      On Calvin and Hobbes, turning any noun into a verb is called verbing. Verbing weirds language.

      • Lurlock
        Lurlock
        June 9, 2013 at 10:45 am | #

        By no means invented by Calvin and Hobbes. The process of verbing has happened for centuries. Even the word “verbing” has been around for quite some time.

    • Totz the Plaid
      Totz the Plaid
      June 9, 2013 at 3:02 pm | #

      I associate it with Community.

  21. bunivasal
    bunivasal
    June 9, 2013 at 4:40 am | #

    Danny, I see a lot of myself in you.

    I knew there was a reason I hated you! God, Danny, you suck.

    • Ivan
      Ivan
      June 9, 2013 at 5:50 pm | #

      He “sucks” because you are in him! What the hell are you doing in him in the first place!?

    • Animal
      Animal
      June 9, 2013 at 10:02 pm | #

      Why don’t you knock it off with them negative waves? Why don’t you dig how beautiful it is out here? Why don’t you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?

  22. WhiteEyedCat
    WhiteEyedCat
    June 9, 2013 at 5:13 am | #

    Dumbiverse Jacob’s only had like two lines, and yet he’s still one of my favourite characters.

  23. Scott
    Scott
    June 9, 2013 at 6:02 am | #

    Dude we’re a little married.

    • Khantalas
      Khantalas
      June 9, 2013 at 7:01 am | #

      I know, I love it.

  24. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    June 9, 2013 at 7:46 am | #

    I wonder if they got rings.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      June 9, 2013 at 12:24 pm | #

      Green Lantern ones, obviously.

      • Chronos
        Chronos
        June 9, 2013 at 2:34 pm | #

        Danny’s is blue, actually.

        • Andiemus
          Andiemus
          June 9, 2013 at 4:05 pm | #

          Is there a power ring of mopiness?

      • Chronos
        Chronos
        June 9, 2013 at 2:35 pm | #

        He *was* hoping Amazi-girl would be there…

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          June 9, 2013 at 11:45 pm | #

          …That makes too much sense.

  25. Rimas
    Rimas
    June 9, 2013 at 12:20 pm | #

    Is no one else wondering why there’s a Sunday update? o_o.

    • Bekah
      Bekah
      June 9, 2013 at 2:55 pm | #

      No. Just you. The rest of us paid enough attention over the last few weeks to realize that we donated $50k to Willis’ kickstarter project and made this happen.

  26. Zobot257
    Zobot257
    June 9, 2013 at 12:51 pm | #

    How are these two friends again?!?

    • robdeweese
      robdeweese
      June 9, 2013 at 10:54 pm | #

      not friends, married….

  27. Kitty
    Kitty
    June 9, 2013 at 2:13 pm | #

    Eh I think most guys have a heterosexual life partner thing going with their best friend from high school. My boy’s still lives with us and he acts more married to him than me! It’s funny

    • robdeweese
      robdeweese
      June 9, 2013 at 6:54 pm | #

      I had a hetero life partner when I was young… until he started hanging with douche bags and I hooked up this awesome chick who fights crimes…

      wait, sorry I think my perception of reality is starting to warp

  28. Jererry
    Jererry
    June 9, 2013 at 7:12 pm | #

    Nothing makes me much happier (at least in this series) than when Danny gets his self-righteous ass handed to him.

    • Jason
      Jason
      June 9, 2013 at 10:26 pm | #

      Isn’t it Joe who’s being the jerk here?

      • Aydr
        Aydr
        June 9, 2013 at 10:30 pm | #

        For some reason it never seems to matter. It’s kind of creepy how much people in these comments hate Danny.

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          June 11, 2013 at 6:26 pm | #

          Agreed. I don’t get the Dorothy hate either. Everyone just likes to be judgmental, I think.

  29. Em
    Em
    June 10, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    In THIS series, I have yet to start hating Danny. So…I think Joe is the douche here. Joe doesn’t have relationships. His goal is to hit it and quit it, so YES obviously he’s going to want to have as good of a time as possible so that the underwear will drop. That’s not Danny’s goal. So Joe and Danny can’t really give each other advice, in my opinion.

  30. joeyo
    joeyo
    September 15, 2013 at 3:28 pm | #

    We need to find a way to combine the terms “Bromance” and “married”

    Broied? Matribrony?

    Matribrony sounds like a brony wedding.

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