Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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June 14, 2026

Moderation

by David M Willis on March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - Three's a Crowd
└ Tags: jennifer, ruth

Discussion (344) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Great minds drink alike!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 10, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

      You can love them or liquor them…

      • Yet_One_More_Idiot
        Yet_One_More_Idiot
        March 10, 2015 at 7:44 am | #

        Liquor? But I hardly know ‘er! xD

        But seriously, I have the feeling that this evening is about to go horribly right for Billie and Ruthie. 🙂 And they should really try to coordinate their purchases in future so that they don’t double up again…unless they really want to, of course. 😉

    • airyu
      airyu
      March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      Drunk minds drink alike~

    • Kris
      Kris
      March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

      Booze today gone tomorrow!

      • neeks
        neeks
        March 10, 2015 at 12:36 am | #

        Booze today, gone later today, probably more booze tomorrow, you mean.

    • T Campbell
      T Campbell
      March 10, 2015 at 12:37 am | #

      LOLCOHOLISM

      • Gigafreak
        Gigafreak
        March 10, 2015 at 1:10 am | #

        AlcoLOLics Anonymous?

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        March 10, 2015 at 6:13 pm | #

        I boughted you a whiskie.

        But I drinked it.

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      March 10, 2015 at 1:03 am | #

      One good drunk deserves another!

    • Agemegos
      Agemegos
      March 10, 2015 at 1:28 am | #

      Great minds like a drink.

    • Rowan Mikaio
      Rowan Mikaio
      March 10, 2015 at 1:39 am | #

      Two drinks are better than one.

    • SKRen
      SKRen
      March 10, 2015 at 3:11 am | #

      A drink in the hand is worth two bottles

      • Khrene
        Khrene
        March 10, 2015 at 3:40 am | #

        A drink in their hands means two in the bush!

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 10, 2015 at 4:36 am | #

          Two girls, two bottles.

  2. An Average Loser
    An Average Loser
    March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Well, at least the beer’s here.

  3. ThisOneOne
    ThisOneOne
    March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Things addictions do to you.

    • Eric
      Eric
      March 10, 2015 at 12:17 am | #

      Something to consider; new studies indicate additions are not fueled by chemical dependence nearly as much as they are by a need to fill emotional voids. They have each other, their drinking could slack off with time.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 2:16 am | #

        Filling those emotional voids won’t do a thing about the delirium tremens, though.

      • Havtorn
        Havtorn
        March 10, 2015 at 9:41 am | #

        For every relationship that fills an emotional void there is another that would drive you to drink.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:30 am | #

      -and to those around you.

    • lekoppa
      lekoppa
      March 10, 2015 at 12:10 pm | #

      The fact that they’re enabling one another doesn’t make their “slacking off” the booze seem very likely at all.

  4. otusasio451
    otusasio451
    March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    This, uh…this won’t end well.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      They both gonna end up with crow’s feet…

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        March 10, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

        They’re gonna end up hung over and dealing with Joyce and Becky.

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

          They’re both gonna wake up in bed with Becky.

          If Joyce is there, that just makes it even more awkward.

          • MM
            MM
            March 10, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

            On the bright side, if Sarah’s there, too, they might actually get some help.

          • Chinoy Industries, Ltd.
            Chinoy Industries, Ltd.
            March 10, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

            Seconded.

          • Architex
            Architex
            March 10, 2015 at 2:29 am | #

            I’ve personally had enough Becky for now.

            • jpic89
              jpic89
              March 10, 2015 at 1:36 pm | #

              Oh, good, I’m not the only one who can’t stand her anymore.

        • Doctor_Lantern
          Doctor_Lantern
          March 10, 2015 at 1:51 am | #

          I’m thinking something along the same lines.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 2:19 am | #

        That’ll be the least of their troubles.

    • Bill
      Bill
      March 10, 2015 at 1:33 am | #

      I’m calling it now — this is the setup for the next Slipshine.

      • David
        David
        March 10, 2015 at 5:28 am | #

        A bottle of whiskey each? Too sad for Slipshine.

  5. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    March 10, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Is the Drinking Game better than the Crying Game?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      The two tend to go hand in hand, depending on what kind of drunk you are.

    • Tacos
      Tacos
      March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

      Who knows. Though the Drinking Game can lead to the Crying Game.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        March 10, 2015 at 12:28 am | #

        Then the Crying Game leads them to drown their sorrows in alcohol, so back to the Drinking Game.

        • Charles
          Charles
          March 11, 2015 at 12:17 am | #

          So… you’d call that the circle game?

      • gwalla
        gwalla
        March 10, 2015 at 12:09 pm | #

        SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: side effects may include Boy George

    • otusasio451
      otusasio451
      March 10, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

      Both have equal potential to lead to shocking revelations that changes the audience’s perception of a character forever, so…

  6. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    March 10, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    You’re acting like having a surplus of beer means you can’t just have one. This is your first test guys. Will power bruh.

    • airyu
      airyu
      March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

      It’s not beer though

      • newllend(henryvolt)
        newllend(henryvolt)
        March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

        Something stronger ?

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          March 10, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

          About 10 times stronger.

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            March 10, 2015 at 12:29 am | #

            Zima on steroids.

            • Barf Ninjason
              Barf Ninjason
              March 10, 2015 at 12:55 am | #

              Now that is a horrifying idea no matter how it’s interpreted.

        • Doctor_Lantern
          Doctor_Lantern
          March 10, 2015 at 1:54 am | #

          I think a generally accepted rule is that a shot, about 2 ounces, of most kinds of liquor (whiskey, vodka, tequila, around 80 proof) has about the same alcohol content as a full 12 ounce beer. Correct me if I’m wrong on in that regard, but it’s my general rule when it came to alcohol consumption.

          • Questionor
            Questionor
            March 10, 2015 at 2:01 am | #

            a jigger or a shot which is 1.5 oz is like a 12 oz can of beer or a 5 oz glass of wine.

            • Doctor_Lantern
              Doctor_Lantern
              March 10, 2015 at 2:14 am | #

              Thank you for the conformation! I could have looked it up, honestly, but I’m lazy and figured someone else probably already knew.

            • Havtorn
              Havtorn
              March 10, 2015 at 9:50 am | #

              How strong is “a beer”?
              ‘Cause around here a beer will vary between 3% to 12% in alcohol content. Which significantly alters that math.
              Is there a standard I’ve missed?

              • Sailor_Arashi
                Sailor_Arashi
                March 10, 2015 at 10:01 am | #

                The average ABV of beer is 4.5% and that’s the number used for that math. You could ask the same question of how strong is “liquor” because it can range from 40% to 90%, but unless you’re drinking Everclear or other specialized distillations, the average is 40% and that’s what’s used in the 1 beer = 1 shot calculation.

                It’s all averages. The average beer drinker is drinking average beer, not artisan Belgian Tripels.

                • Doctor_Lantern
                  Doctor_Lantern
                  March 10, 2015 at 11:14 pm | #

                  I couldn’t have said it better. Thank you.

        • Sailor_Arashi
          Sailor_Arashi
          March 10, 2015 at 10:18 am | #

          The amount of alcohol represented in this strip is enough to kill two 60kg humans under normal conditions.

          The thing is, the more you drink, the more you CAN drink, so the conditions are not normal.

          Essentially, you should be horrified by what you see above. I know I am.

          • Rycan
            Rycan
            March 10, 2015 at 3:41 pm | #

            To me, it’s a sad confirmation of what was already strongly suspected.

            • Solenoid
              Solenoid
              March 10, 2015 at 10:20 pm | #

              These two need to see somebody yesterday.

          • JWLM
            JWLM
            March 10, 2015 at 6:57 pm | #

            Yup. This is actually a terrifying strip.

            It’s almost as terrifying as the one when they first went to bed together and passed out. Intoxication to the degree of loss of consciousness is the first symptom of alcohol poisoning. The only reason we don’t know that it’ll kill one of these two is Willis’ word that none of the major characters will die.

            (Of course, he never said anything of permanent incapacitation. He’s evil like that.)

          • Doctor_Lantern
            Doctor_Lantern
            March 10, 2015 at 11:18 pm | #

            Really? I’m no alcoholic. Granted I am just above the average size for a man in his mid-20’s, but I can polish off a fifth of whiskey in a night no problem. This also means that I am drinking on that fifth for about 6ish hours. (Say 8PM – 2AM)

            • JWLM
              JWLM
              March 11, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

              Two things. One, alcohol poisoning requires not just amount, but rate. We don’t know how quickly these two are going through those fifths. If they go through them in several hours, they’ll probably be OK. However, we have reason to doubt that — remember, Ruth tried to commit suicide with alcohol, and came pretty close to pulling it off. Two, women are more sensitive to booze than men are, so their risk is higher.

            • Sailor_Arashi
              Sailor_Arashi
              March 11, 2015 at 7:16 pm | #

              Billie and Ruth are well below average size for a man in his mid-20s…

              • David M Willis
                David M Willis
                March 11, 2015 at 7:22 pm | #

                Ruth is about average male height. Average adult male height is 5’10”, Billie’s 5’7″, and Ruth is a few inches taller than that.

    • Scoops
      Scoops
      March 10, 2015 at 12:33 am | #

      You’re the second person in the comments who said beer even though Billie said whiskey in the comic.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        March 10, 2015 at 12:45 am | #

        I’ve revealed that I don’t know jack shit about alcohol.

        • tyersome
          tyersome
          March 10, 2015 at 12:53 am | #

          I think you should have said “… I don’t know Jack.” 😉

          • saltchocolate
            saltchocolate
            March 10, 2015 at 1:05 am | #

            Have two internets!

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            March 10, 2015 at 8:19 am | #

            He could have said that… if he knew Jack about alcohol.

  7. LiaHansen
    LiaHansen
    March 10, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Only one thing to do: invite more girls into the self destructive downward sex spiral. Oh well.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

      Why not a self productive sex spiral. Half a bottle each isn’t enough to destroy unless you’re drinkin’ the heavy stuff.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        March 10, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

        Billie described it as whiskey, so that’s plenty heavy.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        March 10, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

        (Lack of) alcohol tolerance suggests otherwise.

    • LeslieBean4Shizzle
      LeslieBean4Shizzle
      March 10, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

      Somebody call Daisy. I’m sure she’d want to get in on that. Also possibly Becky if she’s feeling particularly adventurous.

    • tyersome
      tyersome
      March 10, 2015 at 12:27 am | #

      Well … given Ruth’s sorrier than usual state, I suspect they will be getting fucking pickled, rather than the alternative …

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        March 10, 2015 at 1:11 am | #

        As long as the one is completed prior to the pickling…

    • Khrene
      Khrene
      March 10, 2015 at 3:45 am | #

      I’m pretty sure Self-Destructive Sex Spiral is Lesbian Suicide Pact’s first album.

      • Kryss LaBryn
        Kryss LaBryn
        March 10, 2015 at 10:06 am | #

        Now I want to hear that.

        I suspect they sound like mid-Nineties-era Edie Berkel (sp?) and the New Bohemians.

  8. Kris
    Kris
    March 10, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Great minds think alike…and get drunk together in an ever increasing downward spiral.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

      You booze, you lose…

      • Cynthia
        Cynthia
        March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

        My old floor manager said, “But with dope there’s hope!”

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          March 10, 2015 at 12:25 am | #

          Is crack still wack? Is snuff enough? Does coke make your broke?

          I knew a guy who used to say “Meth ith the thecret to my succeth!” Yeah, he had a funny lisp. Because his teeth fell out from all the meth.

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            March 10, 2015 at 12:32 am | #

            Well, meth is the penultimate solution to the problem of having too many teeth.

            • Kennerly
              Kennerly
              March 10, 2015 at 12:48 am | #

              Sadly, some do…

              http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/health/dentists-remove-232-teeth-from-tumour-in-indian-teen-ashik-gavais-mouth/story-fneuzlbd-1226999722950

              • Kryss LaBryn
                Kryss LaBryn
                March 10, 2015 at 10:07 am | #

                I f I click on that I’m going to deeply regret it, won’t I?

                • dralou
                  dralou
                  March 10, 2015 at 3:22 pm | #

                  Not really, it’s pretty safe. But if the mere sight of teeth makes you feel uneasy, then you should stay away.

  9. Bagge
    Bagge
    March 10, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    This is not a great idea – this is the sort of idea that ends in disaster, and not the fun kind.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      I dunno man. I’m feeling the aster right now.

      • tyersome
        tyersome
        March 10, 2015 at 12:49 am | #

        Well Ruth went from being anemone of Billies … so I guess ending up as an aster is … sort of reasonable?

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        March 10, 2015 at 8:21 am | #

        You feel stars? WOW.

        • Sailor_Arashi
          Sailor_Arashi
          March 10, 2015 at 9:55 am | #

          I feel the cosmos!

          • Kryss LaBryn
            Kryss LaBryn
            March 10, 2015 at 10:08 am | #

            She’s full of stars.

            • Rycan
              Rycan
              March 10, 2015 at 3:45 pm | #

              So am I. In fact, I am made entirely out of starstuff.

              • Solenoid
                Solenoid
                March 10, 2015 at 10:24 pm | #

                HAIL SAGAN!

  10. Dragon
    Dragon
    March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    Noooo….

  11. addude
    addude
    March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    They’re not going to survive this semester, are they?

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      I suspect one of them getting caught bringing booze into the dorm, and getting kicked out as a result, is in the cards. Especially if it’s Ruth. Billie might get a slap on the wrist for a first offense, but an RA getting caught with booze is going to be a lot more serious.

      • Nono
        Nono
        March 10, 2015 at 1:02 am | #

        Mary would pounce at the chance.

      • Injury Man
        Injury Man
        March 10, 2015 at 3:21 am | #

        I feel like Ruth is smart enough to say she confiscated it from a student and was on her way to turn it in to campus security or something.

        • Kryss LaBryn
          Kryss LaBryn
          March 10, 2015 at 10:10 am | #

          She was pouring it down the toilet, but those undergrads are sneaky, so she thought she’d better filter the alcohol out first. With her liver.

          –What? There’s an undergrad in the room, drinking, right now?! Told you they were sneaky!

      • Em
        Em
        March 10, 2015 at 8:30 pm | #

        My friend was an RA and was caught high. She lost her job as an RA and her housing. Wasn’t expelled though. So Ruth…watch that step!

  12. Spencer
    Spencer
    March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    You know, I think these two crazy kids are going to make it in the end.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

      They’re gonna make it after all!

      • Bibulb
        Bibulb
        March 10, 2015 at 12:36 am | #

        I am vaguely disappointed that the link didn’t, in fact, go to Slipshine.

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        March 10, 2015 at 1:10 am | #

        I knew exactly where that link would go, and I thank you for it, Yo.

        • Sailor_Arashi
          Sailor_Arashi
          March 10, 2015 at 8:34 am | #

          Can’t view the link at work, but I’m guessing Mary Tyler Moore?

          • saltchocolate
            saltchocolate
            March 10, 2015 at 10:12 am | #

            You got it, Sailor!

      • Eyebrow
        Eyebrow
        March 10, 2015 at 6:25 am | #

        I knew where that link would go. apparently I am not too old for this comments section after all.

        • Charles Phipps
          Charles Phipps
          March 11, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

          I think they both should seek new partners. I don’t support Buth.

  13. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    What Dram-a Queens

    • neeks
      neeks
      March 10, 2015 at 12:38 am | #

      Ooh, that was a good pun.

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 10, 2015 at 12:52 pm | #

      Dram-a Queens are Drama-mean!

  14. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    March 10, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    I hate everything about this. These are fictional people, I know this, but I am just so concerned about their well-being, I can’t help it.
    Don’t do this to yourselves, girls =/

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      The only good thing I can see coming from this is that they are more likely to do something noticeably stupid so their drinking and relationship becomes public, the powers that be can’t ignore Ruth’s abuse of power and fire her, they are both thrown out of school and respective parents/caretakers put them in some sort of horrible rehab program where they are separated and miserable but at least maybe don’t drink themselves to death…

      Hurray…

      • caesaria82
        caesaria82
        March 10, 2015 at 12:21 am | #

        This is what would probably happen in the real word. In an ideal real world. Or worst case, someone, y’know, dies or kills someome drunk driving or jumps out of a window and can now never walk again.

        …. I am too worried about cartoon people, aren’t I?

      • DuckDuckMoose
        DuckDuckMoose
        March 10, 2015 at 2:02 am | #

        I dunno, having any character get kicked out of IU would almost certainly mean writing them out of the comic altogether, since the story revolves so completely around the whole cast interacting with each other right here on campus. I also doubt Willis would let things turn out quite that badly for anyone. What I do see is the likelihood that Ruth will get a serious reprimand for sleeping with one of her own residents (after Mary blows the whistle, of course), resulting in her and Billie being forced to break up to save her job. That still wouldn’t solve the alcohol issue for either of them, though. Gaah, what a mess.

        • DuckDuckMoose
          DuckDuckMoose
          March 10, 2015 at 2:15 am | #

          Grr, fourteen years writing HTML and I can still miss a step in an [abbr] tag. My hovertext was to the effect that I’m terribly fed up with addiction stories in which the addict has to lose everything and everyone before deciding to recover, a route that I’m hoping Willis won’t take. Not all severe addiction culminates in crushingly bleak cautionary tales.

          • Rycan
            Rycan
            March 10, 2015 at 2:26 am | #

            Correct; some people manage to pull up before they hit rock bottom. Not all, but some.

            • Majere
              Majere
              March 10, 2015 at 5:22 am | #

              I am not a fan at all of the common sentiment that an addict needs to hit rock bottom before they can start to get better. It just encourages people to not step in until shit has gotten way out of control.

              • Bagge
                Bagge
                March 10, 2015 at 9:23 am | #

                I completely agree with both those sentiments on a meta perspective – given that the campus is the story Ruth and Billie probably won’t leave it, and there are too many rock-bottom stories as it is. There are other ways of getting out of an addiction (many of them involve help from other people).

                There are however other problems than the alcoholism. Both of them started their downward journey long before the comic and are already in a “second strike” situation. Billie has lost most of her friends and support from high school (just look at Alice reaction to meeting her) and the university knows about her DUI. Ruth abuses her RA position horribly and should frankly be fired for it, and probably will if any student (Mary…) makes it clear enough for the higher-ups. Even if they didn’t have any problems at all with alcohol they would be just a hairs breadth from being thrown out as it is, and given how reckless the alcoholism make them it could happen at any time.

                Neither of the girls have a strong support network, and from what I have seen the support they will get will probably involve money rather than close attention from a loved one (that’s why I was thinking rehab).

                Add to that that their relationship – adorable as it is – has made it so much harder for them to seek outside help. They can’t risk to out each other, they can’t risk making their drinking known and they can’t risk revealing their relationship. That’s why I think things will continue to spiral out of control until they crash hard.

                But there are of course other ways the story can go. I think the most likely good path forward involve Walky finding out and involving the others in an intervention.

                • Rycan
                  Rycan
                  March 10, 2015 at 3:50 pm | #

                  In other words, Ruth & Billie are hurling towards rock bottom presently, and desperately need to regain control soon if they want to avoid it. Granted, ‘soon’ in this comics means months in real time, but you get the point.

        • Kryss LaBryn
          Kryss LaBryn
          March 10, 2015 at 10:14 am | #

          “I also doubt Willis would let things turn out quite that badly for anyone.”

          Just wondering, did you read the older ‘verses? Because it did end up that badly in one of them.

          Not sure if Willis wants to revisit that a second time, but yeah, he’ll go there.

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            March 10, 2015 at 1:05 pm | #

            Willis has promised nobody is going to die, since given how time moves so slowly, the characters would be in a state of grief for years on end.

            TLDR: Ruth isn’t going to get hit by a truck.

            • Rycan
              Rycan
              March 10, 2015 at 3:24 pm | #

              So instead, we get a slow-motion tailspin. Hooray!

            • DuckDuckMoose
              DuckDuckMoose
              March 10, 2015 at 10:21 pm | #

              Yes, this. I didn’t know Willis had made any guarantees to that effect, but it only makes sense in a slow-moving comic with a delicate comedy/drama balance to maintain. He could hardly kill someone off and then go back to strips about pajama jeans and cereal/Mountain Dew breakfasts. Of course, he could go completely off the rails and start making all the most depressing things happen, but then he would become that which he most despises. Not gonna happen in this universe.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

      I can’t bring myself to worry that much about them. I see no reason they need to quit drinking cold turkey. Just drink less. They’re like…18-20 and they’re in college. Other than those really close calls with Ruth and Billie I feel like it’s not that big of an issue as long as they keep each other in check.

      • MeghanTheWorldEater
        MeghanTheWorldEater
        March 10, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

        And when did they start doing a good job of keeping each other in check?

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          March 10, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

          I honestly haven’t seen enough interactions with them to see any big changes, positive or negative.

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        March 10, 2015 at 12:16 am | #

        …which they kinda don’t, and they kinda DID have those really close calls, and Ruth is kinda suicidal, and Billie kinda wrapped a car around a tree, and they are both using liquor as a coping mechanisms, and they both show clear signs of addiction rather than “just” habit, and they are both sending up so many red flags that every bull in the country would rush this way if they were not color blind.

        • MeghanTheWorldEater
          MeghanTheWorldEater
          March 10, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

          Oh I’m sure it’s all just a huge misunderstanding. It can’t be THAT bad.

          • Kennerly
            Kennerly
            March 10, 2015 at 12:27 am | #

            When NOT drinking makes you feel sick, you’ve left ordinary bad and entered THAT bad.

        • caesaria82
          caesaria82
          March 10, 2015 at 12:27 am | #

          Exactly.

      • Tribbly
        Tribbly
        March 10, 2015 at 12:22 am | #

        Chugging a whole bottle of whiskey each is in alcohol poisoning territory. So it’s kind of a big issue. Especially since if one of them takes a turn for the worse the other won’t be in any position to be of much help.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          March 10, 2015 at 2:41 am | #

          Which is one of the things that is a clanging alarm for alcoholism. An alcohol addict can tolerate a BAC% that would kill someone not addicted and actually remain conscious as I have noted in DUI homicides where the driver had a BAC% in excess of 0.30%.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 8:15 am | #

            >Which is one of the things that is a clanging alarm for alcoholism.

            The bigger alarm is that Ruth, at least, suffers withdrawal symptoms if she stops drinking. That means she’s reached the level of dependence where actually quitting can be almost as dangerous as continuing. She’s an alcoholic by definition just because she must continue to drink in order to even feel normal.

            • Kryss LaBryn
              Kryss LaBryn
              March 10, 2015 at 10:21 am | #

              So the thing to do is to slowly taper off, right? Cut back by degrees until the body can tolerate stopping entirely?

              Which means Billie’s idea was actually a pretty good one–if only Ruth hadn’t had it too. So the thing to do is to put that second bottle away and stay out of it until tomorrow at least. Problem is, I can’t see them staying out of it on their own; they’re gonna need help with that.

              Cue Billie going to Walky and saying, “Hey, Walky, I need you to hold onto this for me until tomorrow night, no questions. Whatever you do, don’t let me have it before 6PM tomorrow.”

              When she inevitably comes around looking for it, Mike will helpfully prevent her from having it by dumping it down the toilet, I’m sure. Meanwhile, though, they hopefully won’t be drinking it tonight.

              • Sailor_Arashi
                Sailor_Arashi
                March 10, 2015 at 12:14 pm | #

                Actually, even slowly tapering off can trigger potentially lethal withdrawal effects.

                What’s even worse is that every time you try to quit and fail, the next time you try the withdrawal symptoms will be *worse*. We’ve seen Ruth try, suffer symptoms including tremors, nausea, and poor equilibrium. The next time she tries to quit she could very well progress to full-blown delirium tremens.

                The only safe course of action once you’re dependent enough to suffer withdrawal symptoms is to seek medical assistance for detoxification. The symptoms can be mitigated with medication. Once the medical emergency has passed, then you find whatever psychological assistance you need to prevent relapse.

                Replies I’ve made linking to a webpage have not been appearing (sorry, Mr. Willis, if I spammed your filter 🙁 ) so just google “Alcohol Withdrawal Syndrome” to find out all the horrible details.

                • Adam Black
                  Adam Black
                  March 10, 2015 at 8:34 pm | #

                  This isnt going to be a webcomic about only being drunk and depressed,
                  —especially if its Danny and Billie being drunk and depressed after Ruth dies in a truck accident.

                  you guys got it all wrong.

                  This is the exquisitely planned warm-fuzzy version of the story.

                  ( Mary gets hit by a truck , by Ruth and Billie this time. No one sees it. She doesnt die. Amber saves her. Mary Blames Amazigirl. Mary gets hit by another truck. Fex was driving it. he takes her Misery style and Nurses her back to ill-health . They get married )

      • caesaria82
        caesaria82
        March 10, 2015 at 12:25 am | #

        I find ‘it’s not that big of an issue’ to be one of the most common things addicts say when they don’t want their friends/family to know they’re addicts. These two show addict behavior. They even have acknowledged and talked about their addict behaviour and wanted to get sober together, but clearly that hasn’t happened. So yeah idk…. I’m worried. Just. Sigh.

        *wraps these two girls up in a protective blanket*

        • timemonkey
          timemonkey
          March 10, 2015 at 2:41 pm | #

          Actually, Billie faked it the whole time and had no intention of stopping, she never even tried.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 3:35 pm | #

            They’re not wrong about exhibiting addict behavior, though. Billie’s reasoning in this strip practically reeks of an addict justifying their behavior. It’s not helped by the fact that she doesn’t even try to suggest they only drink one of the bottles.

            • timemonkey
              timemonkey
              March 10, 2015 at 7:02 pm | #

              Well duh, I was just saying Billie’s never admitted her problem for real and has never tried to start.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 2:34 am | #

        You know what the definition of an alcoholic is? Somebody who is incapable of drinking in moderation. They either drink nothing, or drink the whole bottle, so to speak. In other words, an alcoholic can do one of two things: keep drinking like an alcoholic, or detox and never drink again. Some will oscillate between the two, but there is nothing in between for an alcoholic.

        Billie has already been labeled as an alcoholic, and it’s pretty clear that Ruth is one, too (judging by the withdrawal during her failed detox).

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      March 10, 2015 at 6:41 am | #

      Yeah, this storyline isn’t really pleasant on any level and it’s only going to get worse. And I was really liking Billie for a while there too. I’d feel less awful if I could see a plausible way out but I can’t. They’re not going to quit on their own since they’re in so deep. Billie won’t leave since Ruth is suicidal. Ruth won’t get better without professional help which would take her out of the strip which I would love but Willis likely won’t allow.

  15. alicemacher
    alicemacher
    March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    Get ye to a rehab clinic, girls.

  16. Mattyos
    Mattyos
    March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    this is adorable and terrible all at the same time.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      March 10, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

      adorifying! I even wrote a song about it a while back
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/takecare/

  17. HeinousActsZX
    HeinousActsZX
    March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    These two are perfect for each other.
    I mean, it’s a perfect storm, but eh.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      They’re 100% proof compatible. 😀

      • Orbit Junkie
        Orbit Junkie
        March 10, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

        And just as flamable!

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        March 10, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

        They’re grain alcohol for each other?

        • Kennerly
          Kennerly
          March 10, 2015 at 12:30 am | #

          Grain alcohol is at most 195 proof. 200 is the proof of god.

          • Barf Ninjason
            Barf Ninjason
            March 10, 2015 at 12:53 am | #

            “[spit] What proof is this?! Some huge number?” -Philip J. Fry

          • Gigafreak
            Gigafreak
            March 10, 2015 at 1:13 am | #

            Nah, god’s blood is a bit lower proof than that, else nobody would survive Communion

            • Rycan
              Rycan
              March 10, 2015 at 2:38 am | #

              Christianity would only be for the alcoholics.

              • Opus the Poet
                Opus the Poet
                March 10, 2015 at 2:43 am | #

                Nah, you’re only supposed to have a sip of God’s Blood.

                • Rycan
                  Rycan
                  March 10, 2015 at 3:37 am | #

                  Unless you’re an evangelical who wants to get ‘high on Jesus’.

                  …Wait, wouldn’t that entail baking pot into the communion wafers or something?

                  It’s a wonder I have any Christian friends left.

              • JustCheetoDust
                JustCheetoDust
                March 10, 2015 at 6:09 pm | #

                David Cross had a joke about the disciples being a bunch of drunks who constantly harassed Jesus every time they passed water.

                • Adam Black
                  Adam Black
                  March 10, 2015 at 8:39 pm | #

                  Like because he was in the urine?

                  that would be the perfect time to make “christ-in-me ” jokes.

                  I’m not christian, Am I getting this correctly ?

                • Kennerly
                  Kennerly
                  March 10, 2015 at 8:58 pm | #

                  Adam, one of the miracles they say Jesus did was turning water into wine.

  18. redraine
    redraine
    March 10, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    I… reaaally like it when Billie is happy for once. I mean the rest of the comic she’s either super snarky or kinda neutral. With Ruth? Actually happy.

    • Architex
      Architex
      March 10, 2015 at 2:32 am | #

      And when she looks happy, she definitely looks cuter!

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 10, 2015 at 8:27 am | #

      I don’t think it’s a ‘good’ kind of happy – if she’s happy, why is she so eager to drown herself in booze? I think it’s more like an anticipatory excitement, like “Soon, I won’t have to think or feel anything!”.

  19. LeslieBean4Shizzle
    LeslieBean4Shizzle
    March 10, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    … this is weirdly cute, in an awful sort of way.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      March 10, 2015 at 5:45 pm | #

      That’s kinda Ruth’s and Billie’s whole relationship, right there

  20. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    March 10, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    This is how it starts, by Christmas they’ll be selling their hair to buy combs for each other.

    • M-M
      M-M
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      That is a magi-cal observation! A real gift!!

      • Carriethedragon
        Carriethedragon
        March 10, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

        I’m honestly speechless.

    • Very Good Karma
      Very Good Karma
      March 10, 2015 at 12:53 am | #

      Just a few days ago I was asking a friend what a “happy ending” version of the gift of the Magi would be, and we couldn’t think of one. This is genuinely pretty close in my opinion!

  21. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    March 10, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    So who’s enabling who? I just can’t tell.

    • suzi
      suzi
      March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

      I think we have a case of double-enabling. Kinda terrifying.

      • Barf Ninjason
        Barf Ninjason
        March 10, 2015 at 12:52 am | #

        Dubnabling

  22. Reflex76
    Reflex76
    March 10, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    It’s funny, ’cause they’re gonna drink themselves to death.

    • Barf Ninjason
      Barf Ninjason
      March 10, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

      It’s like my blues song I sorta wrote:

      “Gon’ drink mahse’f to def /
      Where else would I drink mahse’f?”

      Never could get any farther than that.

      • neeks
        neeks
        March 10, 2015 at 12:46 am | #

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lXvhc23xcVA

        Gotta say, “blues run the game” works pretty well as a theme for these two young ladies.

      • Clif
        Clif
        March 10, 2015 at 2:13 pm | #

        “Gon’ drink mahse’f to def /
        Where else would I drink mahse’f?/
        But now ahm drink’n wif you/
        and you’re drink’n youse’f tah def too.
        Well now, lez drink tah our he’f,
        cauze we gots the drink’n-ourse’fs-to-defs Booze.”

  23. Luzahn
    Luzahn
    March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Oh god, such sadness. At this rate it’s going to take another near-tragedy to hit the reset button, and I’m not sure I’m prepared for that.

    I mean, the surface-level cheeriness is far more frightening than the obvious sadness.

  24. licoricepencil
    licoricepencil
    March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    At least Billie is happy at this point in the downward spiral.

    • newllend(henryvolt)
      newllend(henryvolt)
      March 10, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

      No point too having shitty problems in your life and being miserable at the same time.

    • MelanieWaffle
      MelanieWaffle
      March 10, 2015 at 12:12 am | #

      How do I change my gravitas to the pic you have!

      • MeghanTheWorldEater
        MeghanTheWorldEater
        March 10, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

        Right click
        Save image as

        • MeghanTheWorldEater
          MeghanTheWorldEater
          March 10, 2015 at 12:16 am | #

          Though they have a very unique grav so perhaps you shouldn’t and I was too foolish to think of that until after I hit post but >.>

          • Rycan
            Rycan
            March 10, 2015 at 3:40 am | #

            Yeah, uniqueness helps. Fortunately, there is a lot of Joyce in DoA.

      • barefootbiker
        barefootbiker
        March 10, 2015 at 12:32 am | #

        For god’s sake, keep your gravitas. Take it from me, it’s hard enough to get it, and harder to get back once you’ve given it up.

      • barefootbiker
        barefootbiker
        March 10, 2015 at 12:32 am | #

        For god’s sake, keep your gravitas. Take it from me, it’s hard enough to get it, and harder to get back once you’ve given it up.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 3:44 am | #

        Try for a different image of Joyce. Panel 2 from last Sunday is a good candidate, for instance. Just enter this into the appropriate field when you’re setting up a Gravatar, and crop:

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/comics/2015-03-08-tacit.png

        Better yet, troll through the Joyce-tagged strips, and find something you like!

    • Kennerly
      Kennerly
      March 10, 2015 at 12:17 am | #

      The sadness is the morning after.

      • MeghanTheWorldEater
        MeghanTheWorldEater
        March 10, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

        I think they have a pill for that.

        • neeks
          neeks
          March 10, 2015 at 12:47 am | #

          Oh, if any of the so-called “happy pills” actually WORKED…

          • Rycan
            Rycan
            March 10, 2015 at 3:46 am | #

            They do work, but they don’t make you happy – just less depressed than you were before.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 8:41 am | #

            I believe Meghan was making a “Plan B” joke.

            • neeks
              neeks
              March 10, 2015 at 3:05 pm | #

              I know. About what antidepressants actually do, and plan b. I was just saying.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:01 am | #

      Yet her happiness is tied to that bottle.

  25. MelanieWaffle
    MelanieWaffle
    March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    No bad Ruth and Billie. Try drinking something like chocolate milk instead.

  26. Barf Ninjason
    Barf Ninjason
    March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Thought it was about time we checked in with the bad ideas bears

    • MM
      MM
      March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      You’re wasting money in the long run if you don’t buy in bulk!

  27. MM
    MM
    March 10, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Save them, Amazi-Girl! If you hurry, there’s some booze in it for you!

  28. Urukak
    Urukak
    March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    Yeah, if your plan for cutting down on your booze intake gets you this excited, it’s probably not actually a good plan.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

      I’m excited about cutting down my sugar intake because if I don’t I will get diabetes. I’m pretty excited about not being ill due to my bad habits. It’s a start.

  29. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    March 10, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    OK, I can see this happening.

  30. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    March 10, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

    Rules for a general DoA drinking game?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      March 10, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

      Whenever Danny is the worst take a swig.

      • MM
        MM
        March 10, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

        We’ll all die of alcohol poisoning before Ruth and Billie do. 🙁

      • Orbit Junkie
        Orbit Junkie
        March 10, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

        I still don’t understand why no one likes Danny. He’s probably not colorful enough to be everyone’s favorite, but it seems like everyone thinks he’s Satan for some reason.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          March 10, 2015 at 12:29 am | #

          Over four years ago he said something shitty to Dorothy.

          Then he couldn’t figure out Amazi-Girl’s identity when she wore a disguise and adjusted her posture, hair, voice, and mannerisms to deliberately fool him.

          Also he’s pretty vanilla I guess. I dunno. I like him but I get why people aren’t as enthused.

          • Orbit Junkie
            Orbit Junkie
            March 10, 2015 at 12:37 am | #

            I think I have the comments section figured out. Anyone who insults Dorothy must be destroyed, at any cost. It explains everything.

          • JessWitt
            JessWitt
            March 10, 2015 at 12:48 am | #

            Danny’s more of a vanilla-chocolate swirl now since he went bi.

            • Spencer
              Spencer
              March 10, 2015 at 12:56 am | #

              To be honest, I’m kind of bothered by how many people turned their opinion on Danny once we learned he was bisexual. Being happy about more bi-representation is always a good thing, but I recall plenty of comments that were raving about how suddenly Danny was a good character because he daydreamed about kissing Ethan.

              Like, this isn’t supposed to be “UGH, why can’t Danny be a character WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE BISEXUAL”, both because confused fumbling through one’s sexuality is an extremely interesting topic, and seeing him get red faced over Ethan’s glorious manchest is hilarious, but it strikes me as problematic that his sexuality is the only thing some readers care for about him.

              • Nono
                Nono
                March 10, 2015 at 1:07 am | #

                It might be because Danny generally rides on being inoffensive, and that’s not incredibly exciting to most people. He doesn’t have big dreams or aspirations, and even his hijinks aren’t really funny or dramatic (unless they involve Amber). Being bisexual gave him a ‘hook’ and a quirk, so to speak.

                There might be also some residual apathy towards him from Roomies!, just like how there’s a lot of built-up raving over Mike from Shortpacked!

              • DuckDuckMoose
                DuckDuckMoose
                March 10, 2015 at 1:22 am | #

                I was never a Danny hater, but I came around to really liking him when he took the initiative to interrupt Amber’s beat-down on her dad. Him being bi is kind of a fringe benefit next to his development of good judgement and perception.

                • Kryss LaBryn
                  Kryss LaBryn
                  March 10, 2015 at 10:30 am | #

                  Yeah, that’s when he stopped being this passive person to whom things happened, and took a turn towards causing things to happen, himself. When he went from “Oh sure I’ll go along with you to this isolated location and let you borrow my phone to call Amber because you’re her dad, after all, so…” to spitting on the jerk. And the way he stepped up and helped out despite his shock at seeing it was Amber under the mask. And also his face-palm at not realizing it was Amber under the mask, lol.

                  I dunno. That whole Blaine thing really changed him into a more dynamic character. I didn’t hate him before, but I actively like him a whole lot more since that scene. The whole bi thing is just icing on the cake.

              • winter
                winter
                March 10, 2015 at 1:33 am | #

                My interest in Danny pretty much tripled when the comic outed him. I didn’t dislike him before (although I enjoyed casual joking Danny-hate as much as anyone), but it kind of bothered me that my opinion changed so suddenly. It’s not as if I start liking people more irl when I find out they’re not straight.

                But after I thought about it, I’ve come to peace with it. If Danny were a real person at school or at work, I probably would have liked him from the start. But he’s not a real person, and as a character, he’s pretty well-trodden ground.
                He is every single guy in every single B-movie. He’s the everyman who thinks he’s a stand-up guy when really he’s really passive aggressive. He doesn’t have any particular opinions, or talents, or ambitions. But he’s the protagonist so of course an unusual and talented girl (Amazi-girl) will fall for his simple charms anyhow.
                Yeah, that was basically Danny in a nutshell before he got a boner for Ethan and the everyman thing got thrown out the window. I mean, he hasn’t really changed at all, but the story has changed and I like this new story about Danny better than the old one. At least now he doesn’t read like a generic self-insert for wish-fulfillment.

                • Kris
                  Kris
                  March 10, 2015 at 1:39 am | #

                  I can’t blame you. It makes him more interesting. It opens up more stories for him beyond just dating Amazi-Girl or tutoring Sal.

                • Stifyn Baker
                  Stifyn Baker
                  March 10, 2015 at 3:07 am | #

                  Sorry, I think I missed the part where the comic ‘outed’ Danny. Isn’t it pretty well established that homoerotic thoughts are simply A NORMAL PART OF BEING A TEENAGER? Danny fantasizing about kissing Ethan ONCE does NOT mean he’s really gay, or bi, it just means he has a normal human psychology. I still think he’s dumb (as in, self-absorbed and unobservant) for not working out the whole Amazi-Girl thing ahead of time, but then, as a kid I could never work out why Alfred could answer the red phone, and NOBODY EVER WONDERED that Batman and Bruce Wayne had the same butler…

                • Orbit Junkie
                  Orbit Junkie
                  March 10, 2015 at 4:12 am | #

                  Stifyn, I’m going to have to give the benefit of the doubt to Danny on the whole Amazi-Girl thing. None of the other characters have noticed they’re the same person, with the exception of Dorothy. And Dorothy didn’t figure it out, even after having met both Amazi-Girl and Amber, without being hit over the head with irrefutable evidence. No character has picked it up based on the similarity of their mannerisms, so I’m just going to assume that being a reader of the comic makes it more obvious. Genera blindness and all of that.

                • Nono
                  Nono
                  March 10, 2015 at 5:28 am | #

                  Willis has pretty much confirmed that Danny’s bi. Admittedly, correlation doesn’t necessarily mean causation.

                  ‘Course, we haven’t strictly seen Danny express interest in guys outside of Ethan, so he might just be heterosexual + Ethansexual.

                • Bagge
                  Bagge
                  March 10, 2015 at 9:31 am | #

                  Danny won my respect with the whole “You take care of the bad guys, I take care of you” thing, but this is where he really won me over.

                  The thing with Danny is that he defines himself so much from his relationships, so I tend to do the same thing. When he found his attraction for Ethan he finally – FINALLY – got the chance for a relationship that is not really bad for him (well, if Ethan choses to leave the closet that is…).

        • Tribbly
          Tribbly
          March 10, 2015 at 12:30 am | #

          Same here. As someone who was a grade-A wet blanket at the age of 18, I understand the pain that he goes through.

        • Kris
          Kris
          March 10, 2015 at 12:37 am | #

          I think Danny hate sort of took a life of it’s own as a running joke. He’s also kind of boring. Probably because he doesn’t really have much going on compared to other characters.

          • neeks
            neeks
            March 10, 2015 at 12:51 am | #

            I don’t have anything to add here but I initially thought you said “Danny took a life” and my immediate reaction was that that would make him more interesting. Mind you, I like Danny, I think he’s good people. But that would definitely liven things up. Except for whoever’s body is lying in a ditch because of an incident Danny Doesn’t Talk About.

            • Disloyal Subject
              Disloyal Subject
              March 10, 2015 at 1:09 am | #

              Ryan, or Blaine? I think Danny’s smart enough to make a clean kill and get away scott free if he were to put in the effort.

              • Nono
                Nono
                March 10, 2015 at 1:17 am | #

                He’d kill them with math, and Sal will bank off the moon on Rainbow Road.

              • neeks
                neeks
                March 10, 2015 at 3:06 pm | #

                No one would ever suspect him, either. Danny is the “kaiser soze” of dumbing of age.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          March 10, 2015 at 1:21 am | #

          The original reason is his character was responsible for the deaths of (I lost count, so I’m making a SWAG at it) four characters in the other universe, so they hate him here for something another character with the same name and similar looks did someplace else.

          • Urukak
            Urukak
            March 10, 2015 at 2:35 am | #

            All I’m coming up with is Ruth. Are there people behind the Joyce and Walky paywall that died as a result of his actions?

    • caesaria82
      caesaria82
      March 10, 2015 at 12:30 am | #

      Comments section drinking game. Every time someone calls Becky a, y’know, ~bongo~ or hates on her haircut, take a drink.

      • Orbit Junkie
        Orbit Junkie
        March 10, 2015 at 12:38 am | #

        I’d like to reiterate MM’s comment: “We’ll all die of alcohol poisoning.”

        • neeks
          neeks
          March 10, 2015 at 12:53 am | #

          My friends watched Twilight with a drinking game and they had to adjust the rules pretty quickly because one of them was to take a drink every time Bella had her mouth open (while not actually talking, I mean)

      • JessWitt
        JessWitt
        March 10, 2015 at 12:42 am | #

        Capital idea! Take a sip when someone ships any two students. Down a glass when a ship happens.

        • Kryss LaBryn
          Kryss LaBryn
          March 10, 2015 at 10:35 am | #

          Drink every time someone in the comments suggests a line from that day’s strip should be the title of the next book. Chug if it was Willis.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        March 10, 2015 at 12:46 am | #

        I think everyone in the cast is bongos. It’d should be called Bongos of age amiright?

        • Kris
          Kris
          March 10, 2015 at 12:51 am | #

          Bongoes of Age: It’s the drum circle of life!

          • Orbit Junkie
            Orbit Junkie
            March 10, 2015 at 4:15 am | #

            Dumbing of Bongoes?
            Drumming of Age?

            • Solenoid
              Solenoid
              March 10, 2015 at 11:08 pm | #

              Definitely Drumming of Age.

  31. Swoop
    Swoop
    March 10, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

    They have great chemistry. I want them to stay with each other so badly.Can someone please convince me this won’t end in tragedy?

    • Rodimiss
      Rodimiss
      March 10, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

      I’m with you, but I can’t make any assurances about this being anything other than a trainwreck.

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      March 10, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

      Carla will save the day. By somehow convincing them to become potheads instead.

    • Kris
      Kris
      March 10, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

      Well they would have to drink A LOT to die of achohol poisoning so that probably won’t happen anytime soon. I think they’re too smart to try driving especially Billie. They’re both experienced drinkers so they know their limits. Billie’s there to make sure Ruth doesn’t off herself. If they can keep the secret they could stay together for a long time actually.

      • Orbit Junkie
        Orbit Junkie
        March 10, 2015 at 12:29 am | #

        I don’t think Billie’s there to stop Ruth from committing suicide. Billie is there to ensure Ruth doesn’t commit suicide without “taking me with you.” This could present a much larger obstacle to a long and happy relationship.

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/never-2/

        • Kris
          Kris
          March 10, 2015 at 12:31 am | #

          Oh yeah!…well I got nothin for that then. Tragedy Ahoy!

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 3:50 am | #

        If Billie was too smart to drive, she wouldn’t have a DUI. Alcohol impairs good decision-making. And if the only one on hand to take away the keys is equally wasted…

        • Kris
          Kris
          March 10, 2015 at 6:36 am | #

          That’s why she’s too smart to do it. Seems like that would teach you not to try that again. I could be wrong.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 8:05 am | #

            It’s amazing how many terrible ideas seem like good ideas while drunk. The ability to learn from your mistakes is no match for the power of intoxication.

          • John
            John
            March 10, 2015 at 4:53 pm | #

            I’m not sure what about this comic has suggested to you that Billie’s good at learning from experience.

            But on the bright side, Billie doesn’t appear to have a car. I kind of suspect that in the aftermath of her DUI, she doesn’t even have a valid driver’s license.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      March 10, 2015 at 1:23 am | #

      Fermentation and distillation is good chemistry?

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 3:11 am | #

        Nah, it’s evil chemistry. The mark of an evil chemist is a boiling flask of liquid attached to a condenser. The good chemists are ashamed to talk about them, so you rarely hear about the problem. Yet, in every university, you can probably find a distillation apparatus hidden in some basement – if you know where to look.

  32. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    March 10, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

    This is a great plan, and I don’t see how this could possibly go wrong!

    On a completely unrelated note, I’d like to move out of Clark.

  33. Kris
    Kris
    March 10, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

    Or you know instead of getting wasted. They can try the whole leaning on each other to stay sober thing again. That almost worked.

    • winter
      winter
      March 10, 2015 at 1:03 am | #

      Almost worked?
      The last time they tried, Billie couldn’t stop drinking and lied about it. That is a very typical addict thing to do. People slip up, they’re human.
      Ruth was very hurt when Billie slipped up, though, and due to personal reasons she completely blew up at Billie (who in turn went into a depressive phase), and used it as a pretext for not keeping up her own sobriety. That is also a very typical addict/human thing to do.

      As much as I think they need to stop drinking asap, I think that leaning on one another thing is a recipe for disaster. Neither one is strong enough (or detached enough) to deal with the instability and inevitable ups and downs of the other’s journey to sobriety. These two need outside help.

      • winter
        winter
        March 10, 2015 at 1:15 am | #

        And, I forgot to mention, the whole leaning on each other thing only serves to enable the co-dependence Ruth is leaning towards right now. Can’t say for Billie, but Ruth’s real problem isn’t alcohol, it’s depression. And she needs to find a better reason to live than just for Billie. That’s too much pressure to put on another person.

        • Kris
          Kris
          March 10, 2015 at 1:27 am | #

          Well then you have to ask if they’ve recognized they need outside help? Do they even want outside help. They seem content to commiserate or whatever this is.

          • winter
            winter
            March 10, 2015 at 2:00 am | #

            There have been indications Ruth knows her current situation with Billie is not really okay. Billie’s high on new relationship euphoria. I’m not sure if either one of them knows they need outside help, but I think neither one wants it. And asking for help is scary anyhow, esp from someone you don’t know.

            And sorry, I knew you meant it relatively. Certainly between this and trying to quit again, trying to quit would be better. But, I guess I wasn’t really responding to what you said as much as using your comment as a springboard to emphasize how disastrous this whole situation is. I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT THESE TWO AND I JUST WANT THEM TO BE SAFE AND HAPPY! D:

            *ahem* mea culpa.

            • Orbit Junkie
              Orbit Junkie
              March 10, 2015 at 4:25 am | #

              I know your feels, winter.

          • Rycan
            Rycan
            March 10, 2015 at 3:52 am | #

            They certainly won’t improve until they recognize that, and are actually willing to seek out or at least accept that help. Otherwise, they’ll just keep on drowning along with their sorrows.

            • Kryss LaBryn
              Kryss LaBryn
              March 10, 2015 at 10:41 am | #

              And as long as seeking outside help means admitting to drinking when they shouldn’t be, or being in a relationship when they shouldn’t be, with either of those things enough to get them kicked out, let alone both, they probably won’t seek outside help. Too big a risk of getting kicked out.

              Of course, like Sarah realized, sometimes losing your place at university is the preferable course, if not getting help means, you know, winding up dead. However, they’re unlikely to see it that way, so for now, I can’t see them going for outside help voluntarily, unfortunately.

              • Rycan
                Rycan
                March 10, 2015 at 3:13 pm | #

                There’s a reason why the second A in AA stands for Anonymous.

      • Kris
        Kris
        March 10, 2015 at 1:33 am | #

        Also “almost” was relative to the fact that it was still better than this. Still you brought up fair points all the same.

        • Gigafreak
          Gigafreak
          March 10, 2015 at 2:06 am | #

          I would disagree on the grounds that “a relationship based on lies in which one person is drinking herself to death” is probably still shittier than “a relationship NOT based on lies in which both people are drinking themselves to death”

          Because, like, the relationship is still over if only one of them ends up dying of alcohol poisoning, so it comes down to “lying to Ruth” being worse than “not lying to Ruth”

  34. Keroshino
    Keroshino
    March 10, 2015 at 12:14 am | #

    God…dammit…Billie!

  35. Eric
    Eric
    March 10, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

    This comic is very similar to the reason I started drinking rye neat; to slow myself down from gin. It worked for a while. I had to quit entirely for several months to reset after that predictably snowballed.

  36. Kennerly
    Kennerly
    March 10, 2015 at 12:21 am | #

    Well, at least they haven’t graduated to liter bottles…or worse, 1.75 liter bottles.

    • Barf Ninjason
      Barf Ninjason
      March 10, 2015 at 12:49 am | #

      Look, I hate the metric system too, but it’s not THAT bad

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 10, 2015 at 2:19 am | #

        What is wrong with 1 litre or even 2 litre bottles?

        • Barf Ninjason
          Barf Ninjason
          March 10, 2015 at 12:04 pm | #

          I was just making a silly anti-metric joke; 2 liters of liquor does not sound like all that much for two people though.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 12:06 pm | #

            One liter of liquor is a lethal dose for a 60kg human.

            Unless they’re an alcoholic that has built up a tolerance, like these two.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:14 am | #

      Real question is, how many meals a day involve alcohol?

  37. HCB
    HCB
    March 10, 2015 at 12:28 am | #

    “Who’s the third in this storyline?” I asked myself. “There’s someone complicating the relationship in all the ot-” And then I realized it’s alcohol and then I was sad.

    • Orbit Junkie
      Orbit Junkie
      March 10, 2015 at 12:46 am | #

      And now I’m sad. Thanks for that.

    • Barf Ninjason
      Barf Ninjason
      March 10, 2015 at 12:50 am | #

      I was already sad but I hadn’t realized the theme of the chapter so now I’m sadder also

    • neeks
      neeks
      March 10, 2015 at 12:54 am | #

      Might also be Mary at some point, but alcohol works too.

      • tim gueguen
        tim gueguen
        March 10, 2015 at 10:15 am | #

        It would be ironic if Mary charged into Ruth’s room, ready to confront them, telling them she’s going to get them thrown out for their relationship…

        …only to see the booze, rip it out of Billie or Ruth’s hand, and chug a bunch of it down. She then promises to keep her mouth shut about their relationship if they share their alcohol with her.

        • Kryss LaBryn
          Kryss LaBryn
          March 10, 2015 at 10:44 am | #

          No way Mary would allow herself to be compromised in front of someone, especially someone(s) she considers sinners.

          No, she’d confiscate it and then sneak it back to her room and drink it there, in secret, if she was going to do it at all.

          More likely, though, she’d just be even more disgusted, snap off a few photos for evidence, then return with the Dean.

          • No Name
            No Name
            March 10, 2015 at 12:49 pm | #

            IF they let her live that long.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        March 10, 2015 at 5:13 pm | #

        I’m reminded that Mary could get Ruth fired for, you know, that time she slapped Mary in the face, or at orientation when she flung Billie into a chair.

  38. historyman68
    historyman68
    March 10, 2015 at 12:38 am | #

    Not sustainable.

  39. Knorretje
    Knorretje
    March 10, 2015 at 12:49 am | #

    As somebody who has quite the history with alcohol and suicidal attempts I can’t help but feel very worried and yet also very sympathetic with these two. I’ve had a similar evening with an ex of mine, and she ended up in the hospital chained to her hospital bed while I woke up 2 towns over without shoes and cuts and bruises everywhere. I hope Ruth and Billie will just get sloshed, stay in their room and have drunken makeouts. I actually really like their characters a lot.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      March 10, 2015 at 6:00 pm | #

      I feel ya. I hope you’re doing better now!

  40. Flipz
    Flipz
    March 10, 2015 at 12:51 am | #

    …it’s like watching a train wreck…in slow motion…

  41. The Thing
    The Thing
    March 10, 2015 at 12:53 am | #

    I’m going to quote Yelling Bird here:

    THIS BETTER LEAD TO FISTING

    • Gigafreak
      Gigafreak
      March 10, 2015 at 1:18 am | #

      With Billie and Ruth, the fists more frequently contact faces than orifices

      • Architex
        Architex
        March 10, 2015 at 2:37 am | #

        Yeah, you might as well just go read “Moon Over June” on Slipshine

        • Keroshino
          Keroshino
          March 10, 2015 at 5:28 am | #

          OH GOD, NO!

          The faces…the expressions…ahhh!

        • The Thing
          The Thing
          March 10, 2015 at 10:19 am | #

          Why must you remind me that this is a thing that exists? ;~;

          • No Name
            No Name
            March 10, 2015 at 10:22 am | #

            Hey, you started it by quoting Yelling Bird. You have no one to blame but yourself.

  42. MiaKitty
    MiaKitty
    March 10, 2015 at 1:01 am | #

    Cut to next week, they’re both totally smashed playing a game of Edward Fortyhands

    • Orbit Junkie
      Orbit Junkie
      March 10, 2015 at 4:29 am | #

      Your Gravatar looks like Joyce’s version of Edward Fortyhands. I have a feeling Joyce’s version ends with more adorableness and less heartbreak.

      • Sailor_Arashi
        Sailor_Arashi
        March 10, 2015 at 7:49 am | #

        Edward Soft-ServeHands is no laughing matter, my friend. The hell of brain freeze awaits those foolish enough to try it.

  43. Ashley
    Ashley
    March 10, 2015 at 1:21 am | #

    Oh, girls.
    You’re both so adorable.
    And so wrong.

  44. WingedBeast
    WingedBeast
    March 10, 2015 at 1:24 am | #

    Or, and here’s another idea, check if there’s a Campus AA?

    I realize that there are other, possibly even better treatment options, but AA does have the advantage of being, you know, free.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:17 am | #

      Billie does have a parental money tap on hand, though. She just needs to recognize the extent of the problem first, and that sadly has yet to happen.

    • Sailor_Arashi
      Sailor_Arashi
      March 10, 2015 at 4:09 am | #

      At this point they actually require medical assistance to quit. Once you start suffering withdrawal symptoms, quitting isn’t just a matter of getting shakes and seeing pink elephants. Alcohol withdrawal can easily lead to permanent brain damage or death.

      Their earlier plan to just quit cold turkey was actually a terrible one.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 4:15 am | #

        Ah yes, that’s right. First comes detox, THEN comes rehab. If I recall correctly.

        • Sailor_Arashi
          Sailor_Arashi
          March 10, 2015 at 7:46 am | #

          Yeah. You can’t treat it like quitting cigarettes. If you start throwing up when you STOP drinking you need to seek immediate medical attention, not a twelve step program.

  45. DuckDuckMoose
    DuckDuckMoose
    March 10, 2015 at 1:37 am | #

    Billie… Billie, you are calling Ruth’s name with the sack in your hand and the door wide open. It’s all supposed to be on the down-low, remember? In the public eye, you’re still fighting. You… oh, forget it.

  46. Twilightomens
    Twilightomens
    March 10, 2015 at 1:47 am | #

    I know this is wrong but Billie is so adorbs <3

    • Keroshino
      Keroshino
      March 10, 2015 at 5:32 am | #

      i have to agree…Billie is pretty cute!

  47. Doctor_Lantern
    Doctor_Lantern
    March 10, 2015 at 1:49 am | #

    My empathy for these two is quickly dwindling. I was hoping once they finally accepted their feelings for each other they could help each other to a better place. Instead they are both playing a dangerous game of enabling.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:27 am | #

      Oh, this was a trainwreck from the start.

      And assuming you meant sympathy, I certainly still have some for that couple. Or maybe it’s just pity.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      March 10, 2015 at 6:25 am | #

      I mentioned way back that their getting together would lead nowhere good since they’d just be a bad influence on each other but everyone else shouted at me that putting two alcoholics with depression issues together would make them get better.

      • Rycan
        Rycan
        March 10, 2015 at 3:28 pm | #

        Only upside is that Billie is keeping Ruth from suicide, but that won’t last unless they seek help.

  48. Kennerly
    Kennerly
    March 10, 2015 at 1:56 am | #

    Let the meeting of the Enemies of Bill W commence!

    • Sailor_Arashi
      Sailor_Arashi
      March 10, 2015 at 7:42 am | #

      “Enemies of Bill”. I like that. I’m gonna have to make that part of my lexicon 😀

  49. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    March 10, 2015 at 1:57 am | #

    How totally sad.

  50. Kiggy
    Kiggy
    March 10, 2015 at 2:08 am | #

    What could possibly go wrong? ~_~

    • Kiggy
      Kiggy
      March 10, 2015 at 2:09 am | #

      Hey! My avie changed again. It’s been a long while.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        March 10, 2015 at 11:01 am | #

        You taunted the Random Number Gods one too many times.

        • Rycan
          Rycan
          March 10, 2015 at 3:05 pm | #

          So THAT’S what ‘RNG’ stands for!

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 3:48 pm | #

            RNGesus saves.

            • Kamino Neko
              Kamino Neko
              March 10, 2015 at 4:40 pm | #

              Niiiiiice.

  51. chris73
    chris73
    March 10, 2015 at 2:33 am | #

    Third panel Billie looks like a granny

    • No Name
      No Name
      March 10, 2015 at 5:10 am | #

      Must be the crows’ feet.

  52. Torra
    Torra
    March 10, 2015 at 2:55 am | #

    ahh man you guyss

  53. Kabo
    Kabo
    March 10, 2015 at 3:19 am | #

    Half a bottle of whiskey: “moderation”

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      March 10, 2015 at 3:54 am | #

      Ethyl logic.

  54. The Heretic
    The Heretic
    March 10, 2015 at 3:47 am | #

    Well, this is a wonderfully depressing note to start my day on.

  55. Megatron
    Megatron
    March 10, 2015 at 3:56 am | #

    I’ve murdered billions of sentient beings, and what makes feel bad about myself? That I’m laughing at fleshling alcoholics.

    • Gigafreak
      Gigafreak
      March 10, 2015 at 9:17 am | #

      Well, organics don’t instantly turn permanently sober when you prod them on the head just right. It is a glaring design flaw that organics lack this functionality!

      • Kryss LaBryn
        Kryss LaBryn
        March 10, 2015 at 10:52 am | #

        “F.I.M. chip”? My brain keeps trying to turn that into “FTM”. I know it’s wrong, but I can’t get it out of the way enough to figure out what FIM is… And Google is only giving me Transformers/MLP crossovers. O.o

        –Ah. Fuel Intake Moderation. Got it. Had to search with “chip” in there too.

    • Twilightomens
      Twilightomens
      March 10, 2015 at 11:12 pm | #

      I know, right???

  56. Willoughby Chase
    Willoughby Chase
    March 10, 2015 at 4:40 am | #

    I hope it’s not a waste of a fine single malt.

    • maxlines
      maxlines
      March 10, 2015 at 5:53 am | #

      I bet it is Olde Mr. Boston.

    • Sailor_Arashi
      Sailor_Arashi
      March 10, 2015 at 9:47 am | #

      I doubt even Billie’s deep pockets could long support binge-drinking single malts. Ruth’s limited budget surely couldn’t.

      They’re drinking Aristocrat, the MD20/20 of liquors.

  57. Lulu
    Lulu
    March 10, 2015 at 5:09 am | #

    This won’t end well, right?
    Two alcoholics trying to keep it together in drinking…
    Makes me curious what tragedy must happen again to make them reach recovery alcoholics stage, let’s hope it will be some 3rd party than Ruth or Billie.

    • Marie
      Marie
      March 10, 2015 at 3:52 pm | #

      Ruth’s brother? He could show up unexpectedly.

  58. Lordess of Madness
    Lordess of Madness
    March 10, 2015 at 7:26 am | #

    Oooh! Can’t wait to see how this one ends!

  59. Joe
    Joe
    March 10, 2015 at 8:43 am | #

    Best lesbian suicide pact ever.

  60. Bilal Kalyal
    Bilal Kalyal
    March 10, 2015 at 9:26 am | #

    Ahem!
    ….”A little less conversation, a little more action please
    All this aggravation ain’t satisfactioning me”~

  61. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    March 10, 2015 at 1:12 pm | #

    What sound does the Disaster Train make?

    Chug, chug, chug…

  62. Chnams
    Chnams
    March 10, 2015 at 2:17 pm | #

    Well that looks like a healthy relationship…Ugh.

  63. Tufto
    Tufto
    March 10, 2015 at 2:50 pm | #

    Part of me feels sympathy for them. The other half of me just loves chaos.

  64. Marie
    Marie
    March 10, 2015 at 3:49 pm | #

    Or they could save one bottle for tomorrow. Forced moderation, and cheaper.

    • Marisa Mockery
      Marisa Mockery
      March 10, 2015 at 6:11 pm | #

      You’ve never been around addicts have you? XD

      • Marie
        Marie
        March 10, 2015 at 6:55 pm | #

        Nah, my mom’s an alcoholic. I’m not saying it’s something they’d actually -do-, but if they both thought of that idea I’m surprised there wasn’t a second of hesitation, especially since they’re college students (and thus might not be able to get booze tomorrow, due to smuggling issues, getting IDed, or money)- and addicts certainly can scheme.

  65. Andrew
    Andrew
    March 10, 2015 at 3:55 pm | #

    “Oooh, New Drinking game! Every time we have the same great idea, HUG!”

    This is how i read it at first, and I prefer it that way.

  66. ZORK
    ZORK
    March 10, 2015 at 3:57 pm | #

    I actually read “hug” first instead of “chug”.

    Granted, wouldn’t be a drinking game then, but maybe healthier and cuter.

    • ZORK
      ZORK
      March 10, 2015 at 4:17 pm | #

      Whaaa- new gravatar?!

      I was Ruth, I got finally used to her, and now I am… who am I, actually. I don’t recognize this face, even though I like her slightly annoyed expression.

      • Sailor_Arashi
        Sailor_Arashi
        March 10, 2015 at 4:37 pm | #

        You are Daisy

        • No Name
          No Name
          March 10, 2015 at 4:40 pm | #

          Actually, they’re Grace, Mandy’s girlfriend/roomie.

          • Sailor_Arashi
            Sailor_Arashi
            March 10, 2015 at 4:41 pm | #

            Oh yeah, you’re right! If forgot she existed!

        • John
          John
          March 10, 2015 at 4:42 pm | #

          Nope. That’s Grace, Mandy’s roommate/girlfriend.

          • ZORK
            ZORK
            March 11, 2015 at 2:20 pm | #

            Thanks for the replies.

            Grace seems to be cool. I’m surprised I did not remember her.

  67. TacticalIllusion
    TacticalIllusion
    March 10, 2015 at 4:58 pm | #

    These two are a train wreck made in heaven.

    • Starman
      Starman
      March 21, 2015 at 4:34 am | #

      Your name is a perfect illustration of why this won’t work in the long run.

  68. Kenjia
    Kenjia
    March 10, 2015 at 5:01 pm | #

    This will not end well.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      March 10, 2015 at 6:04 pm | #

      It also didn’t start or middle well.

    • Coco
      Coco
      March 12, 2015 at 1:03 am | #

      I was going to say what Kenjia said word for word. -slow clap-

  69. The Wizard
    The Wizard
    March 10, 2015 at 8:31 pm | #

    If you drink half, you’ll be just half buzzed half the time.

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