Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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'siri, what is a strap-on?'
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June 14, 2026

Shorter

by David M Willis on April 2, 2014 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - I Was a Teenage Churchmouse
└ Tags: ethan, joyce

Discussion (243) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    April 2, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    It would be much cuter if you had a strapon (I’m gonna have to draw this again)

    • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      April 2, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      http://i.imgur.com/g7Mxj5n.png

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        April 2, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

        NOOOOOOOO…

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          April 2, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

          YESSS, oh please draw this it can only be magnificent. (

          • lejwocky
            lejwocky
            April 2, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

            http://24.media.tumblr.com/62d5405f834e192f6135cc00608482d1/tumblr_mjihuv58qb1r9j9xbo1_500.gif

      • merle
        merle
        April 2, 2014 at 8:08 am | #

        Well, there’s one link I’m certainly not clicking at work.

        • -Sentinel-
          -Sentinel-
          April 2, 2014 at 2:06 pm | #

          Nah, it’s perfectly SFW.

      • Jaxx Sentinel
        Jaxx Sentinel
        April 2, 2014 at 8:15 pm | #

        I don’t know how , but yes, she does look cuter with a strapon

      • Alzarath
        Alzarath
        April 6, 2014 at 5:47 pm | #

        The little strap-onsss.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 1:27 am | #

      http://i.imgur.com/4XzgXBn.png

      • Shadow12000
        Shadow12000
        April 2, 2014 at 1:41 am | #

        oh my god yes

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 2, 2014 at 1:51 am | #

        Awesome.

        And good thing she put the cap back on that marker.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          April 2, 2014 at 4:13 pm | #

          Seconded. Truly awesome.

      • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
        Thanks, I'll Have Another!
        April 2, 2014 at 2:01 am | #

        GLORIOUS.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        April 2, 2014 at 2:16 am | #

        hey, I should maybe finish moving into this apartment so I can finish MY strap-on drawing =p

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        April 2, 2014 at 7:13 am | #

        😀

      • Stewart C Baker
        Stewart C Baker
        April 2, 2014 at 11:30 am | #

        It’s a sausage! She’s wearing a sausage!

        • Lilly
          Lilly
          April 2, 2014 at 5:43 pm | #

          …of sorts.

        • kirwar4face
          kirwar4face
          April 2, 2014 at 9:54 pm | #

          They say sausage is delicious! I’m a Vegan myself.

      • ocbrad1
        ocbrad1
        April 2, 2014 at 11:31 am | #

        Yesssssssssss!!!

      • Schist
        Schist
        April 2, 2014 at 12:06 pm | #

        I feel like she would have worn it on her head first thinking it was a prosthetic unicorn horn.

        • 11bane
          11bane
          April 2, 2014 at 12:20 pm | #

          Yeah, that’s what I was

          • 11bane
            11bane
            April 2, 2014 at 12:20 pm | #

            Hrm, meant to link to the picture…

            http://i62.tinypic.com/nly9nc.png

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              April 2, 2014 at 1:45 pm | #

              hahaha
              That’s cute.

            • Leorale
              Leorale
              April 2, 2014 at 3:42 pm | #

              So majestic!

              • 11bane
                11bane
                April 2, 2014 at 4:39 pm | #

                Of course the real question is where she got it….and if it’s been used before.

                • Deathstalker
                  Deathstalker
                  April 2, 2014 at 6:36 pm | #

                  Sarah has toys.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        April 2, 2014 at 8:55 pm | #

        That was… disturbing.

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        April 2, 2014 at 9:55 pm | #

        Such majesty.

      • dmb
        dmb
        April 5, 2014 at 4:48 am | #

        Joyce’s plastic mister-happy is very festive.

    • Hinoron
      Hinoron
      April 23, 2014 at 10:59 am | #

      Sarah: “No Joyce wait, don’t Google it!”
      (Sarah quickly makes popcorn, sets up a chair and her iPhone video recording)
      Sarah: “Okay Joyce, NOW you can Google it!”

  2. Mr K
    Mr K
    April 2, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    She’ll do so, and her mind will break. Hopefully forever.

    • Tunaro
      Tunaro
      April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      The broken psyche of her once pure soul will serve as the perfect gateway to summon Cthuga, Unholy Elder God, bringing fire and despair down on us all. SIRI, WHAT HAVE YOU DOOONNNEEE???!!!!

      • GoldStarz
        GoldStarz
        April 2, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

        “I have detected two locations that carry this product. They’re pretty close.”

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        April 2, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

        Siri, hail DAB.

    • ocbrad1
      ocbrad1
      April 2, 2014 at 12:07 pm | #

      In the interest of science, I performed that Google search Joyce talks about. Unless my office’s safety filters are more stealthy than I thought, it is a fairly benign result…until you switch to an image search!

      • Ghola
        Ghola
        April 2, 2014 at 12:19 pm | #

        Did you turn safesearch on? Because you know she’s never taking safesearch off until she’s hit the breaking point of Ethanlust and googles lady boners.

        • sps48
          sps48
          April 2, 2014 at 7:24 pm | #

          Safesearch cannot be turned off anymore.
          Damn you, Google!!

          • SAL
            SAL
            April 2, 2014 at 9:12 pm | #

            It can be! It’s under the gear. google image cats, turn it off, and then switch to web and browse. It’s easier to find under images.

  3. Stephen
    Stephen
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Hahahahaha.

  4. Tunaro
    Tunaro
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    And then Joyce goes into a horror coma…

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      And awakens as someone who makes Faz look normal and unperverted.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

        The Rise of Anti-Joyce!

        • Ahighfunctioningsociopath
          Ahighfunctioningsociopath
          April 2, 2014 at 12:52 am | #

          Oh no, here we go again.

  5. Van Dyne
    Van Dyne
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    the joke that keeps on giving. Wait, no, that’s not how that phrase goes.

    …you know what I mean.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      Strap-ons are the gift that keep on giving. and then taking. And then giving. and then taking.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 2, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

        I think it does both at the same time instead of alternating, like some kind of Schrödinger’s sodomy.

        • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          April 2, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

          Schrödinger’s Double Penetration.

          • Robin
            Robin
            April 2, 2014 at 5:05 am | #

            Ah yes, with the famous Double Penetration Experiment, through which the boner/vag duality was discovered.

        • Gigafreak
          Gigafreak
          April 2, 2014 at 9:10 am | #

          Schrödomy?

          • Kyrros
            Kyrros
            April 2, 2014 at 1:43 pm | #

            Ha! All with a cat Gravitar as well :-p

  6. AHR
    AHR
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Why does Joyce think this, anyway? Is it cause of Amber? My memory…it sucks…

    • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      Mike made a strap-on comment about Joyce vis-a-vis Ethan near the start of the chapter.

    • TheOthin
      TheOthin
      April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      Sarah offhandedly remarked it.

      • JAD
        JAD
        April 2, 2014 at 1:59 am | #

        First Sarah, then, six strips later, Mike:

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/02-i-was-a-teenage-churchmouse/makeover/
        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/02-i-was-a-teenage-churchmouse/pagans/

    • Blackbird
      Blackbird
      April 2, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      Yes, Joyce is jealous of Amber since Ethan said he loves her more than he’s ever loved anyone, so she’s trying to look more like her, and in the process making all of us realize that Amber’s kinda boyish.

    • BlackIo
      BlackIo
      April 2, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      Because when Joyce said “I thought I’d wear something Ethan would like”, both Mike and Sarah immediately responded with “Like a strap-on?”

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      April 2, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      It has been a running gag since the start of the chapter.

    • BlackIo
      BlackIo
      April 2, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

      Actually, I think we’re all misreading the original question. Joyce probably thinks that Ethan likes this look because Amber has shorter hair and wore a hoodie both times she confronted Ethan about his relationship with Joyce.

      • AHR
        AHR
        April 2, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

        Yeah, Blacklo has it right. not the strapon part, the whole ” I am doing this as a gift for Ethan and he will like it!” bit.

  7. Xerxes93
    Xerxes93
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Wait, is she trying to imitate amber?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      Then she should be up in her room, wearing 3-day old clothes knee-deep in zombie hordes.

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        April 2, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

        She should also have a superhero identity. Maybe Fundie-Girl, who annoys the bad guys to death with her cheeriness.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          April 2, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

          I think she’s been established as Bible Belt.

          • Rex Hondo
            Rex Hondo
            April 2, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

            Bible Thumper has a much more “Righteous Vengeance” vibe.

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              April 2, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

              Her utility belt should still be called the bible belt.

              • Rex Hondo
                Rex Hondo
                April 2, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

                Of course, it’s where she keeps the wide variety of weaponized bibles with which she thumps sinners.

                • Leorale
                  Leorale
                  April 2, 2014 at 2:55 am | #

                  Yes.

                • brionl
                  brionl
                  April 2, 2014 at 12:11 pm | #

                  And old-testament style strap-ons.

                • HMRC4EVR
                  HMRC4EVR
                  April 2, 2014 at 6:13 pm | #

                  And flash drives filled with episodes of Superbook and Bibleman to force criminals to reveal their nefarious plans or be forced to watch them.

        • Cybersnark
          Cybersnark
          April 2, 2014 at 6:01 am | #

          She could be allies/enemies/deuteragonists with Kid Crusader.

  8. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    I wonder if Joyce’s Google has the dafe search on…hmmmmmmm 😀

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      She actually put parental blocks on her own phone.

      • newllend
        newllend
        April 2, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

        That she put on there herself.

    • GoldStarz
      GoldStarz
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      I doubt the Departemnt of Aeromechanics and Flight Engineering has anything on sex toys.

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        April 2, 2014 at 12:23 am | #

        Somehow I feel the inventor of the flying dildo disagrees with you.

    • paradoxius
      paradoxius
      April 2, 2014 at 12:55 am | #

      I just checked. The phrases “strap on”, “strap-on”, and “strapon” are filtered by safe search.

      • TheSuicidalGiraffe
        TheSuicidalGiraffe
        April 2, 2014 at 3:22 am | #

        ROFL IM FUCKING DIEING!!!!…
        *sigh*
        Few, Thank You Iro

        If only all comments with pictures could be this perfect, i swear, Iro saying that has made my week

  9. EvilPenguin
    EvilPenguin
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Also make sure you check out “pegging”

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      April 2, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      “But what does hanging out the washing got to do with srap-ons?”

      • Triniking
        Triniking
        April 2, 2014 at 8:32 am | #

        I’m trying to +1 this as hard as I can.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          April 2, 2014 at 8:04 pm | #

          ^_^

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      That should be covered in the related searches section.

    • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      Thanks, I'll Have Another!
      April 2, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      “Ooooh! I love cribbage!”

      • Phillip Wilde
        Phillip Wilde
        April 2, 2014 at 9:15 am | #

        “Oooh! I’ll have to bring my old Lite-Brite back here next time I go home!”

  10. Jenniffniff
    Jenniffniff
    April 2, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Don’t do it, Joyce!!!

  11. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    April 2, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    If you drew a little happy face on it I’m sure it could be cute.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      Fuck! That’s going into the drawing.

      • Leorale
        Leorale
        April 2, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

        Yayyy

      • newllend
        newllend
        April 2, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

        Where can I see all these drawing I’m tempted now.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 2, 2014 at 1:28 am | #

        http://i.imgur.com/4XzgXBn.png
        DID IT.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          April 2, 2014 at 2:59 am | #

          Comedy GOLD

        • ocbrad1
          ocbrad1
          April 2, 2014 at 12:10 pm | #

          Beautiful! As always, awesome job!

  12. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    April 2, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    That is not going to get old for a least a week or two.

  13. TFielding
    TFielding
    April 2, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    I met someone at My college Christian group named Joy who acts a lot like Joyce. A few months ago I met someone named Mike who looks and acts like Mike. I’m sensing a conspiracy.

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      April 2, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      Well, you haven’t met Faz yet.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 2, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

        Let me show you by this chart the location of all Faz’s in your 10 square mile radius.

        • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

          That chart is mandated to be posted in all public buildings by state law. There’s a registry and everything.

          • MM
            MM
            April 2, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

            They keep the “What to Do If You Encounter a Faz” brochures on a little table nearby.

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              April 2, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

              “No sudden movements. Even the slightest twitch could cause a Faz to become aroused”

              • Psycho
                Psycho
                April 2, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

                “Bash it immediately over the cranium with a heavy object. Don’t worry about lawsuits and such, any authority would understand the desperation of the situation”.

                • begbert2
                  begbert2
                  April 2, 2014 at 10:38 am | #

                  “However, if you are in a particularly litigious area (such as the united states), a suggested alternative approach would be to mummify the Faz with your standard-issue grappling hook, and then hand them over to the nearest authorities, who are authorized and experienced in the use of physical force.”

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      If you have a counselor named Ninja Rick, would that have to become canon in the Dumbiverse?

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      A few months ago I met someone named Mike who looks and acts like Mike.

      So you only see his hair from the side?

    • blah
      blah
      April 2, 2014 at 8:19 am | #

      I didn’t know Mikes existed. In the “asshole playing life on god mode and it working” sense.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        April 2, 2014 at 10:39 am | #

        There’s a significant number of them in the american political system.

  14. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    April 2, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Is it anything like a condom cap?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      Yes, condom caps are to strap-ons like pillow cases are to pillows.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

        I thought butts were to strap-ons as pillow cases were to pillows.

        • JustCheetoDust
          JustCheetoDust
          April 2, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

          Yeah, because no one jams a pillow into a pillow case dry.

        • Raye J
          Raye J
          April 4, 2014 at 1:44 pm | #

          don’t forget vaginas. Lesbians use ’em too.

  15. Bill
    Bill
    April 2, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Is the smoke supposed to be Ethan exiting stage left, or did he just short-circuit and self-destruct and that wisp of smoke is all that’s left of him?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      Ethan made the mistake of eating the mystery meat burritos for lunch.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        April 2, 2014 at 4:30 pm | #

        But in his defense, he can’t help it. He always eats the meat, mystery or otherwise.

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        April 2, 2014 at 5:11 pm | #

        I am a truly sick individual.

        The first thing that popped into my mind was the Mario Kart Rainbow Road theme. XD

  16. Psycho
    Psycho
    April 2, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    She’s gonna need a mindwipe afterwards.

  17. Zuzi
    Zuzi
    April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    I desperately want her to look that up

    • newllend
      newllend
      April 2, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      I want to see her reaction after she does.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        April 2, 2014 at 9:00 pm | #

        +1 to that. Willis, make it so!

  18. newllend
    newllend
    April 2, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    “Did you notice something different about me?”

    “Was I suppose too?”

    If it was anyone else they would have already fucked up.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      April 2, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      That’s for sure.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      April 2, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      Panel 3 would have been Ethan lying on the ground, bloodied.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      April 2, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

      This question always horrifies me. It’s not that I can’t notice the change, it’s that I’m afraid the chance I notice will be the wrong one.

      • Cybersnark
        Cybersnark
        April 2, 2014 at 6:04 am | #

        Well, you wouldn’t really notice anything short of a change in bodies, would you?

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          April 2, 2014 at 4:26 pm | #

          I saw what you did there.

      • madd
        madd
        April 2, 2014 at 10:30 am | #

        But if they don’t ask, and you don’t comment on the change, then they can nurse a slow, simmering “you never really look at me” resentment. Especially if it’s something they do for your benefit.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        April 2, 2014 at 10:41 am | #

        Yeah, pretty much every time I find myself exclaiming, “Hey, you’re pregnant now!” it goes poorly for me.

      • Heavensrun
        Heavensrun
        April 2, 2014 at 12:48 pm | #

        “Yeah, I wasn’t going to say anything but you really -should- get more exercise.”

        • newllend
          newllend
          April 5, 2014 at 12:35 am | #

          *Pfff*

  19. LiamAldam
    LiamAldam
    April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Anyone else really want a Joyce? I do.

    • Hoboturtle
      Hoboturtle
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      I would keep her in my pocket.

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        April 2, 2014 at 5:13 pm | #

        Don’t wear a strap-on, Joyce. Be the strap-on!

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      April 2, 2014 at 10:42 am | #

      As long as she’s still prone to being a vocal fundamentalist, I’ll pass.

  20. Bickendan
    Bickendan
    April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    It’s a trap!

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      That’s the section of the internet I try to stay away from

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 2, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

        Did somebody say Meat Spin?

        • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          Thanks, I'll Have Another!
          April 2, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

          Disappointing click.

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            April 2, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

            I was never going to link to that video. Not if I wanted that comment to stick around.

            • JustCheetoDust
              JustCheetoDust
              April 2, 2014 at 12:40 am | #

              I will admit that I missed an opportunity for proper misdirection.

            • Tenn
              Tenn
              April 2, 2014 at 5:22 pm | #

              And YouTube would never let it stay if anyone uploaded it.

              I thought the proper misdirection was going to be a Rickroll, though.

              *sigh* I haven’t been Rickrolled in like forever.

            • Opus the Poet
              Opus the Poet
              April 2, 2014 at 9:48 pm | #

              Don’t link the video when you can link infinite loop website

    • shietka
      shietka
      April 2, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

      Ethan wishes.

  21. Salmo
    Salmo
    April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    I’m on the verge of wishing the strap-on had a tag so I can look up all these references.

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      April 2, 2014 at 12:46 pm | #

      Just use the Joyce Tag, they’ll probably all be on the first page.

  22. Well_Played
    Well_Played
    April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Very few things that make be do a spit take Willis… Very few things…

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      April 2, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

      By the same token, only a few events actually merit a sincere OMG (complete with a *gasp!* and an exclamation point) — and this is one of them. Holy fuck! Ethan disappeared entirely!!

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        April 2, 2014 at 12:45 am | #

        It’s like he said Candlejack out lo-

  23. Jay Eff
    Jay Eff
    April 2, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    DON’T GOOGLE THAT, JOYCE.

    (also, don’t google the top ten wesley pipes quotes, while we’re at it)

    • newllend
      newllend
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      But if you do, look up Rebel taxis top 10 Ugliest cartoons as well

      ( might as well destroy whats left of interest in cartoons)

  24. MM
    MM
    April 2, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    If she does, the TV Tropes page for “Break the Cutie” is gonna have a new illustration.

  25. John Madden
    John Madden
    April 2, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

    AHAHAHAHAHA

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      I know, right?? This is pretty much all I have to say about it, too. I am just so pleased that she actually said this to him, ahahaha

  26. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    April 2, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

    I’m reminded of the first Native American stand-up comedian, Running Gag.

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

      I have some serious reservations about that comment.

      • Raye J
        Raye J
        April 4, 2014 at 1:53 pm | #

        *snerk* I can’t figure out whether you meant that to be a joke or not. If it’s a joke, very subtle, I approve.
        If it’s not a joke, any offense I might have taken is canceled out by the Mike avatar.

  27. Menocu
    Menocu
    April 2, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

    Luckily this isn’t the Walkyverse Joyce and that Google search won’t send her into a catatonic state where she can only sing Do Re Mi.

    • MM
      MM
      April 2, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      …Maybe.

  28. nothri
    nothri
    April 2, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

    I’m expecting Joyce’s head to explode in a few strips now.

  29. Tealjoy
    Tealjoy
    April 2, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

    Hahahahahahahaha this is now another favorite, that boy ran away so fast.

  30. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    April 2, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

    “This is a thing you like in girls, right?”

    No Joyce, he’s gay. You know this. He doesn’t care how pretty the package is because either way it’s getting returned in mint condition.

    • newllend
      newllend
      April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

      BURN!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      April 2, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

      So like how a toy collector prefers to keep their toys inside their original wrapping?

    • madd
      madd
      April 2, 2014 at 10:24 am | #

      But … I thought that was wthe hole point of this relationship. He wants a girl, who isn’t in to premarital hanky panky, so that he can pretend/try to not be gay and she wants a boy, who doesn’t want to bone her, so that she can pretend/try not to be tempted by manly parts.

      • Regalli
        Regalli
        April 2, 2014 at 11:31 am | #

        It was. But I think we’ve established by now that this whole thing is doomed to failure, yes? This is basically the inevitable.

      • Em
        Em
        April 2, 2014 at 7:28 pm | #

        This is true, but she wants him to like her. She wants him to look at her and think “Man I have a gorgeous girlfriend.” But he can only do that objectively, and that’s not what she wants.

      • David
        David
        April 3, 2014 at 2:15 am | #

        Either does not want what he wants.

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      April 2, 2014 at 12:43 pm | #

      But Amber has shorter hair and was wearing a hoodie last time Joyce saw her, so….

  31. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

    GoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleitGoogleit

  32. theskeuomorph
    theskeuomorph
    April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

    God this Ethan/Joyce relationship is the worst. Not the writing, just the situation. Every time it gives me this knot of empathetic frustration in my stomach.

  33. Aeron
    Aeron
    April 2, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

    I had to read it twice to notice the smoke trail in the last panel. Poor Joyce.

    *tweety voice* She woses mo boyfriends dat way!

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      April 2, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

      Love the Tweety voice!!

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      April 2, 2014 at 12:28 am | #

      This is the only version of Tweety that I can think of right now.

      • MM
        MM
        April 2, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

        He’s certainly got the right eyes.

  34. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    April 2, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

    This is the first strip – anywhere- that has caused me to laugh out loud and exhale a mist of soda all over my monitor at the same time. And I never drink at the pc…till tonight.

    • Bill
      Bill
      April 2, 2014 at 8:35 am | #

      The dreaded “Pepsi syndrome”.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      April 2, 2014 at 10:48 am | #

      So what you’re saying is, every time you drink at the PC you spit it all over your monitor?

  35. saltchocolate
    saltchocolate
    April 2, 2014 at 12:31 am | #

    Joyce broke the first rule of lawyering: Never ask a question you don’t already know the answer to! Too bad Sarah wasn’t there to egg her on caution her against this move.

  36. JA
    JA
    April 2, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

    Oh god she said it.

  37. cmd1095
    cmd1095
    April 2, 2014 at 12:35 am | #

    and soon we will have a comic detailing the shell-shocked Joyce who just learned what a strap-on is in explicit detail

  38. Nena
    Nena
    April 2, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

    Oh dear! Joyce walks into all kinds of silly situations.

  39. shoeboxjeddy
    shoeboxjeddy
    April 2, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

    This is the best. Thank you Willis for making the best thing. I had hoped that someone would do it, and there you go, you’ve done it. For all of us. Good job at making the best thing.

  40. Fuzzydaemon
    Fuzzydaemon
    April 2, 2014 at 12:55 am | #

    This is seriously the best!

  41. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    April 2, 2014 at 1:03 am | #

    Was that a flrrd?

  42. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    April 2, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

    Yes please do google that, Joyce. It’d be fun for everyone involved (mostly us) and for you it’d be educational. Do eeeeeet.

  43. David
    David
    April 2, 2014 at 1:09 am | #

    This can drag on for a lot longer: “Safe Search is On”, and Joyce would not touch that.

  44. WaveRocker
    WaveRocker
    April 2, 2014 at 1:10 am | #

    Burrrrrrrrrn

  45. EvergreenFir
    EvergreenFir
    April 2, 2014 at 1:14 am | #

    I imagine Joyce would buy a purple sparkly one.

  46. Bilfred
    Bilfred
    April 2, 2014 at 1:47 am | #

    That is just the best running joke, Willis.

  47. GhostWriterL
    GhostWriterL
    April 2, 2014 at 1:50 am | #

    This is the last we’ll see of Joyce, because she’ll have googled it and she’ll live out the next few years in a hospice in a mostly catatonic state, emerging with a complete consciousness reset to where she thinks she’s due to start her first year of college. Her new roommate will be Roz and Robin’s younger sister, whose obsession with cereal has only increased with the onset of puberty and freedom from parental control. Leslie will have taken a sabbatical to do first hand research on women’s rights movements in various developing countries and replaced by Hooper, whose class reading material will be instead replaced by the entire series of The Walking Dead.

  48. Pat
    Pat
    April 2, 2014 at 1:53 am | #

    He’s supposed to notice she’s wearing different clothes? Does she change that infrequently?

    • -JAD-
      -JAD-
      April 2, 2014 at 2:11 am | #

      No, but the style had not changed that much, except for the date with Joe (and Mike).

  49. flamelordkay
    flamelordkay
    April 2, 2014 at 2:40 am | #

    “This is a thing you like in girls, right?”
    No, silly. He obviously doesn’t like putting anything in girls.

  50. Tahkuya
    Tahkuya
    April 2, 2014 at 2:40 am | #

    Lets all google strap-ons with Joyce

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      April 2, 2014 at 5:13 am | #

      The new Google Strap-On, coming soon.

      • Nono
        Nono
        April 2, 2014 at 6:08 am | #

        Strap-On Goggles?

      • Spaz
        Spaz
        April 2, 2014 at 6:19 am | #

        Its major competitor, the Facebook Strap-on, allows you to notify your friends that you are using it. Now with Oculus Rift support!

        The Google Strap-on is similar, except it forces you to use your real name.

        • Spaz
          Spaz
          April 2, 2014 at 6:19 am | #

          Although the Google Strap-on DOES have Youtube integration.

          • John
            John
            April 2, 2014 at 6:49 am | #

            Roz’s favorite feature!

          • David
            David
            April 2, 2014 at 6:57 am | #

            You misspelt “Youlube integration”.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          April 2, 2014 at 3:49 pm | #

          “Poke.”

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          April 2, 2014 at 11:37 pm | #

          Google Strap-On also has Voyeur+, while Facebook has vibration support.

      • StClair
        StClair
        April 2, 2014 at 8:59 am | #

        “OK Strap-On, _________.”

  51. John
    John
    April 2, 2014 at 5:16 am | #

    Joyce disintegrated Ethan with sheer horror. Nothing left but smoke.

  52. ninja_jesus
    ninja_jesus
    April 2, 2014 at 5:51 am | #

    I imagine Joyce not going to be very happy with Mike and Sarah.

  53. maxlines
    maxlines
    April 2, 2014 at 6:41 am | #

    Well, that will be interesting to see Joyce’s reaction to what she finds on google.
    I hope nobody tells her to google “2 girls 1 cup”.

    • shadow eagle
      shadow eagle
      April 2, 2014 at 7:33 am | #

      dang, now i gotta google it.

      • NF
        NF
        April 2, 2014 at 9:03 am | #

        Famous last words.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        April 2, 2014 at 10:50 am | #

        I strongly recommend you resist the temptation.

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        April 2, 2014 at 5:35 pm | #

        Schmuck Bait!

        • Tenn
          Tenn
          April 2, 2014 at 5:36 pm | #

          Whoa! TV Tropes just fulfilled my desire to be Rickrolled!

          It was so long since last time… *lights cigarette*

          Wait, I don’t smoke.

    • Retroviral
      Retroviral
      April 3, 2014 at 9:57 pm | #

      Or eel soup, she definitely shouldn’t google eel soup.

  54. Jack Finch
    Jack Finch
    April 2, 2014 at 6:58 am | #

    So Ethan, how’s that “in control” thing working out for ya? All good?

  55. Bill
    Bill
    April 2, 2014 at 10:11 am | #

    I have this hunch that Joyce thinks a “strap-on” is a type of clothing, like a “pullover”.  I wonder how long before she finds out otherwise.

    • brumagem
      brumagem
      April 2, 2014 at 12:23 pm | #

      I suppose one could consider it apparel.

      • Raye J
        Raye J
        April 4, 2014 at 1:58 pm | #

        Well one does wear it…

  56. madd
    madd
    April 2, 2014 at 10:35 am | #

    Is it weird that I now have a burning curiosity as to what would happen if I asked Siri what a strap on is?

    • Usayasha
      Usayasha
      April 2, 2014 at 4:13 pm | #

      Investigate. Report. You have been charged with a holy task.

    • Tenn
      Tenn
      April 2, 2014 at 5:39 pm | #

      Siri: “I thought you would never ask!”

      And then you would buy the Apple iDong so she could show you in artificial person.

  57. Alexx
    Alexx
    April 2, 2014 at 10:51 am | #

    HA. I love running gags. Especially when they make people run.

  58. brumagem
    brumagem
    April 2, 2014 at 12:22 pm | #

    Ho-damn, I never expected that joke to come back again.

  59. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    April 2, 2014 at 12:39 pm | #

    It just dawned on me that she’s dressed like that because she’s trying to emulate Amber, because Ethan said to Amber that he loved her last time they met, and holy crap she was adorable but now it’s so sad.

    • Lis
      Lis
      April 24, 2014 at 11:27 pm | #

      yeah took me an archive binge to figure it out, I was so freaking confused.

  60. ajm5007
    ajm5007
    April 2, 2014 at 12:56 pm | #

    I was trying to figure out what gave her the impression that hoodie & short hair was something Ethan likes in girls. Then Heavensrun hit it. Thanks for the assist.

  61. DSL
    DSL
    April 2, 2014 at 2:35 pm | #

    I don’t really understand how a booster rocket that attaches to the side of the main vehicle applies to this situation.

  62. Kraang the Somewhat Wobbly
    Kraang the Somewhat Wobbly
    April 2, 2014 at 3:08 pm | #

    OH MY FUCKING GOD, Willis.

  63. Asurasur
    Asurasur
    April 2, 2014 at 3:14 pm | #

    I for one can’t wait until she does google it. That reaction shot is going to be GREAT!

  64. Asurasur
    Asurasur
    April 2, 2014 at 3:16 pm | #

    Or better yet, what if she totally justifies it, as it won’t allow her physical contact!

    • Silvester Crow
      Silvester Crow
      April 2, 2014 at 9:23 pm | #

      Maybe she’ll test it out with dorothy while walky watches.

  65. common reader
    common reader
    April 2, 2014 at 6:27 pm | #

    read the comic and as I was finishing it ” invalid arguement” error popped on the computer….quite the fun situration!

  66. Robert
    Robert
    April 2, 2014 at 6:57 pm | #

    Are we not seeing ethan in that last panel because he fainted?

  67. JACK KUROSAWA
    JACK KUROSAWA
    April 2, 2014 at 7:27 pm | #

    I would like to see that 4th panel redone in such a way that you can only see Joyce’s lips whispering into Ethan’s ear.

    It would be my wallpaper for forever.

  68. mistrali
    mistrali
    April 2, 2014 at 7:31 pm | #

    …Dear God, Willis, please don’t tell us something like this happened to you.

  69. Rutee
    Rutee
    April 2, 2014 at 7:44 pm | #

    I am just now getting that she’s dressed like this because Amber wore it. Oh holy cheese this is hilarious. I can’t wait to watch these dramabombs explode some more XD

    • arank11
      arank11
      April 2, 2014 at 7:57 pm | #

      Holy crap! I didn’t catch that! Wow. I applaud you, Willis

  70. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    April 2, 2014 at 10:01 pm | #

    At first I was XD, then I realized how that comment from Joyce must have bit into Ethan’s insecurities and I was :(, then I realized Joyce is dressed that way to emulate Amber in a futile attempt to get Ethan’s attention and I was D:.

    Way to feels, Willis. Way to feels.

  71. Björn
    Björn
    April 3, 2014 at 12:00 am | #

    Am I the only one who thinks this will give Ethan mental images of Jocelyn?

    • Björn
      Björn
      April 3, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

      Her hair, that is.

  72. Red5
    Red5
    April 3, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    http://lmgtfy.com/?q=strapon

    • Ivan
      Ivan
      April 3, 2014 at 11:51 am | #

      The WIKI version at the top is an awful fancy looking one.

      “Multi-function” <—???? “…with vibrating egg.”

      Oh! I guess it’s a massager too!!!

      • Crumplepunch
        Crumplepunch
        April 3, 2014 at 2:52 pm | #

        It’s a back massager.

    • Corronchilejano
      Corronchilejano
      April 3, 2014 at 4:46 pm | #

      If she has safe search on (obviously) she’ll find nothing.

  73. Kschenke
    Kschenke
    April 3, 2014 at 9:33 am | #

    I know everyone is focusing on the strap-on comment, but my god the “short hair” bit made me cringe. Stop talking, Joyce. Just stop talking.

  74. Lis
    Lis
    April 24, 2014 at 11:25 pm | #

    oh man it took an archive crawl to figure out why she thinks she figured out what Ethan liked in a girl. I was so confused the first time through.

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