Kieran Bright is a college student home for the summer and roped into an online reunion with his old neighborhood friends in the most recent update of their favorite childhood MMORPG.
At least, he was, and that was the idea...
Join Kieran and his friends as they are pulled into another reality that may or may not be real and are forced to confront their own identities, the nature of simulated universes and reality itself.
Stand Still, Stay Silent
Minna Sundberg
A few generations after the end of the world, a small, poorly financed research crew is sent out to rediscover whatever is left of the forbidden old world in the south.
Three Panel Soul
Matt Boyd, Ian McConville
It's a pretty rigid format but we keep the content loose, you know?
Lies Within
Lacey
Lysander's aimless and carefree life is turned upside down when he accidentally discovers that the cute boy next door, Simon, is a literal monster
Augustine
Winter Jay Kiakas, Windy
August and her ragtag group are just like everyone else, simply surviving in the treacherous Crater... When they stumble into what may be an artifact of the ancient past, their lives are thrown into a much bigger loop as they trifle with bounty hunters, monsters and gods.
Empowered
Adam Warren
A sexy superhero comedy (except when it isn't) about the never-ending struggles of a plucky but very unlucky young superheroine.
Barbarous
Ananth Hirsh, Yuko Ota
A crummy wizard and an anxious monster have to get over themselves and bring order to an apartment building full of misfits.
Heroes of Thantopolis
Izzy Strontium Hall
A living boy fights to save the City of the Dead.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
Blindsprings
Kadi Fedoruk
Tamaura, wrested into a world 300 years in the future, must find a way to save the magic fading from her country.
Sleepless Domain
Mary Cagle (Cube Watermelon)
In a world where magical girls and their battles are commonplace, loss has become all too common as well.
Saint for Rent
Ru Xu
Saint Halliday runs an inn for Time Travelers. Unfortunately, he seems to attract other supernatural "guests," too.
Not Drunk Enough
Tess Stone
Logan Ibarra is possibly the unluckiest repairman in the world. A late night job should not have landed him in the middle of a mad scientist's squabble, but he soon finds himself surrounded by monsters and further madness with little tools to get out.
Sakana
Mad Rupert
Our heroes must navigate a hazardous dating scene, overcome personal anxieties, and wrangle unruly seafood in order to find love, peace of mind, and a paycheck.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
The Golden Boar
Magnolia Porter Siddell
A young woman joins a group of summoners who call forth Guardian Beasts to protect their isolated magical island. Unfortunately, her Guardian Beast is nothing like she'd imagined, and he's about to change her life, and everything she thought she knew about herself...
Nerf Now!!
Josué Pereira
A cute webcomic about fanservice, video games, and... love. Mostly video games, though.
Freakshow
Scotty
A festival of broken people, blood flows in the center ring. Come one and come all, to the greatest show in all of Paris.
The Weave
Rennie Kingsley
A young woman pursued by bad luck is witness to the murder of the Fairy Queen of Summer. Can she get to the bottom of this mystery?
Ozzie the Vampire
Eric Lide
Ozzie and her best friend Kimmy are your average everyday normal art students – except one is an immortal vampire with superpowers and the other possesses a magic talking grimoire. Also they have to save their town from a demonic invasion.
Angel's Orchard
Harry Bogosian
After the events in Demon's Mirror, Gerda has accepted her role as a Demon Hunter, and Cezar has traveled back to the Demon City. Demons have existed alongside humans for millennia, so things begin to return to normal. But an impossibly powerful Relic has been taken by one of the Demon Masters, and a silent war enters its final stages.
Novae
KaiJu
A historical romance with a touch magic and a dash of astronomy. It chronicles the romantic adventures of Sulvain, a sweet tempered necromancer and Raziol, a passionate 17th century astronomer.
ARISE, YE SKELETON KING
Brian Clevinger, Escher Cattle, Lee Black
A troupe of wandering "adventurers" down to their last silver "acquire" a map only to find the real treasure was the fiend they dug up along the way.
Little Tiny Things
Clover
What are the little things that move us? The simple joys that warm our bodies and hearts? The micro life of insects that influence our world more than we think? The tiny steps we make everyday to have a happier tomorrow?
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Sister Claire
Yamino
In the troubled aftermath of a great war between Witches and her fellow Nuns, novice Sister Claire just wants a purpose.
Nigh Heaven & Hell
Scotty
Heather Vodihn is on a simple mission: find her father. However she becomes entangled with two strangers with mysterious powers being stalked by a group with bizarre demands. Heather must learn to trust her new traveling companions, even if she is untrustworthy herself.
Namesake
Isa, Meg
There's ghosts at your heels and fairy tale worlds ahead. What do you do? Jump down the rabbit hole!
Monster's Garden
Ash G.
Champion pit fighter Kilo Monster was content to spend the rest of his days tending to his quiet garden alone... until he met a curious robot girl and her human family.
The Messenger
indui
In a ruin-abound town cursed with bad luck, Kai and Kalla--a young boy and a fledgling dragonbird spirit--take on a quest in hopes the reward will solve all of their problems.
Edison Rex
Chris Roberson
The adventures of the world’s greatest villain who, after defeating his superheroic nemesis, decides that he’s the only one left to defend the world.
Peritale
Mari Costa
A fairy godmother with no magic tries her best to successfully fulfill a Fairytale and win the respect of her peers.
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I guess you didn’t get the memo from Pope John Paul II. It’s still demeaning to the value of marriage to view your wife with concupiscence in your heart.
If he didn’t get to have fun, why should anybody else?
Not a very useful eye if it spends 90% of its time in pants or underwear (depending on whether you sleep nude or not). And when you do get a view of something other than cotton, it’s often shit.
The disadvantages of being a penis: your next door neighbor is an asshole, your two best friends are nuts, and your only entertainment is being stuck in slimy, smelly cave and forced to do push-ups until you puke.
I don’t care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I got my plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car.
Comes in colors pink and pleasant,
Glows in the dark ’cause it’s iridescent,
Take it with you when you travel far!
I remember back about 1979 or so, a group of us were swacked out of our minds on beer and Wild Turkey, watching an old Patrick Wayne “Sinbad” movie with claymation monsters – with the sound turned off and a ZZ Top album playing in the background.
Sure it does! Without a functioning GI system to support it, the brain is guaranteed to be unable to retain that information for long! It’s also guaranteed to be unable to live for long, but that’s a minor detail.
Naw they were still in the shell. I had a bag of them and put them in my hoodie since it didn’t have pockets and I didn’t want to carry the bag. Then I forgot about it when I went to put up my hood later.
American** presidential campaign. Not everyone on this site is from America/gives a crap about American politics/was old enough to be interested in politics 3 years ago.
If you want to be picky, that would be “United States” election, not American. There are two continents named America, and even the northern one is shared with other countries.
But whether you cared or not, our pervasive media obsession blanketed the planet with some of the highest-quality stupidity ever seen for over a year. And that stuff was broadcast. I expect we’ll eventually have to apologize to galactic civilization about that.
That would be overly picky, in my opinion, Rich. The formal names of almost any country on the globe look like “State of ___,” “Republic of ___,” or “Kingdom of ___.” There’s also, officially, “United States of Mexico” and the “Federated States of Micronesia,” which no one thinks should not be called Mexico and Micronesia. So, why don’t we get to claim “America” and be “Americans”?
Meh. I was poking fun at Just Saying for objecting to my not being specific enough I an offhand joke about our obnoxious politicians, in part by not being specific enough myself. Not worth arguing about.
Our southern neighbor is properly translated as the United Mexican States though, not the US of M. Bit like if we were the United American States – close, but not quite right. Calderon tried to get the name changed to just Mexico a few years back, but it didn’t take AFAIK.
Plus, most of Latin America refers to us at estadounidense, which you could roughly translate to ‘United States-ians’. Granted, they also refer to us as americanos (and gringos, but that’s similar to calling us ‘Yankees’). Then, to make matters more confusing, the Brazilians like to call us norte-americanos, as if we’d actually managed to conquer Canada and Mexico (we’ve tried in the past, and partially succeeded in the latter case).
Not quite the same thing. The only other country that claims the name of the continent it resides upon is Australia, and that’s because most of that continent is the Commonwealth of Australia.
But, the convention now is that US citizens are referred to as ‘Americans’ (there’s precious little else to choose when we call ourselves the ‘United States of America’). At least we can usually distinguish when we’re talking about the continents (‘the Americas’, ‘North America’, ‘South America), unlike Australia.
I tried typing “United States of America” everywhere I was referring to the country once. It made for some very wordy paragraphs. After a while I ended up just abbreviating it to “America” because my fingers got tired of typing. Which is what most people end up doing from the start, because they’re not humorless pedants.
One tricky thing about this that’s not necessarily obvious is that even though the supercontinent of which “North America” and “South America” are subdivisions is called “The Americas” in English, it really is called “America” in most other languages.
Except that the United States has no elections. Even for President, the states have 50 elections on the same day to elect delegates to The Electoral College, who then get to vote for President. Cause we live ina juryrigged — not to mention gerrymandered — 18th Century Rube Goldberg Federal Republic.
Clearly, characters in all forms of media, especially those of the comical variety, and especially frequent consumers of alchohol posses their own little pocket dimension with which they can carry a flask of their favorite alchoholic beverage.
A female friend of mine with a similar body type to Billie once successfully concealed my airsoft pistol on her person on a dare, while wearing nothing more than a t-shirt and jeans. Suffice it to say that while I was certain I knew where it was hidden, going after it would have probably compromised the friendship between not only us, but me and her husband as well.
I would fucking love it if Billie would move beyond this “I hate who I am” thing to something like “I want to be something I don’t hate”. Its a serious waste of a good epiphany there.
Also, she’s clearly extremely helpful. She’s already provided Walky with the most effective means to get through this party. Friends don’t let friends go to a Joyce party sober.
I grew up Christian, and as you know, they have high standards. Which is to say, everything comes with multiple standards and you’ve got to stack them to make room.
UH EXCUSE YOU IT’S BOYZ WITH A Z NOT AN S. Actually I don’t really care I just thought I should be a brat.
Anyway, Billie come on. Get past this whole too cool for Walky phase you’re in. I don’t understand it. Also, is this Walky’s first drink? Haha Joyce is gonna be piiiiiiissed.
Pretty sure it’s anything she can get her hands on, but I believe she has been depicted drinking whiskey before (the night she attempted to wait up to make Sal sign the roommate agreement).
Would Dorothy frown on Walky underage drinking? She’s generally more accepting of most things than Joyce, but I don’t know if she’ll cut the Walkster some slack for something that’s technically illegal.
Also calling that Walky is going to spill the beans about his 26 when drunk.
Someone’s right. That is surprisingly generous of Billie.
Okay David- can I call you David?
I’m dense. Where can I find your toy reviews? They were one of my favorite parts of Shortpacked, and I really miss them because they don’t run in the sidebars here. Please help a hapless wayward fan of your work and direct me in the appropriate direction? Athankew.
You really are a master of this variable paneled strip style of storytelling. It is often a surprising pleasure but always deftly delivered. You have practiced long and hard at this, and we’re catching you in your stride. You’ve got all of the character designs and characterizations down and your backgrounds are second nature by now. You work weeks and months ahead because they all speak so clearly and interact so well and plotlines occur to you, presenting themselves with ease. Which you unfold patiently for the audience.
It is a genuine joy to watch you enjoy yourself this much while you enjoy commercial success as well. I think you are the American dream of comics. “Work hard, make something good and you will succeed.”
“Lick it by God-des and She is totally fine as long as you pretend it’s about heterosexual married couples!” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Why2n9XtlNw (absolutely NOT SAFE FOR WORK AT ALL and sadly some words are censored)
I was watching my Muppet Show DVDs a while back, and when the Elton John episode came on I called through my mum who’s a bit of a fan.
When he performed Crocodile Rock in a feathered outfit and rhinestone swimming cap, she rolled her eyes and said “Can you believe he was supposed to be in the closet in the seventies?”
Likewise, “Nikita” is a man’s name, despite the music video constantly showing a woman. It’s like Elton John was never very closeted, but people around him kept having to build up those walls.
I don’t actually know what song you’re talking about, but I was confused for quite a while when I heard people speaking of Nikita Khrushchev because I thought he was a woman.
Burst into laughter when I realized what was happening and why in the last panel. Thank you Mr. Willis, that was great. He doesn’t even need to ask her, she just pours him some. XD
Ethan and Danny is more likely than Joyce and Becky. But so is like, any other pairing ever. The Joyce and Becky ship crashed at the dock. Never sailed for even a little.
The SS Joyce Becky spent almost a decade under construction, but tragically left port on its maiden voyage with only half its crew and passengers. The ship didn’t even make it out of the harbor before it capsized and sank like a stone.
10 August 1628, maiden voyage of the hugely powerful, innovative new warship Vasa, commisioned by the King of Sweden as a weapon with which to dominate the Baltic Sea: “Vasa sank, after sailing barely 1300 meters”, within Stockholm harbor. (Amazingly, no one was hung or beheaded over the loss. In the 1960s Vasa was recovered from the bottom of Stockholm harbor and is now the centerpiece of a very cool museum.)
I hate to say it, but this is the type of party I’d enjoy a lot more. Every time I went to a “real” college party I felt so overwhelmed and completely out of place.
I dunno. That’s from 20 years ago, and Becky’s about 18?
Joyce’s Boyz II Men track has the explanation that her mother listened to it. Conversely, the only way Becky would have heard Jill Sobule’s song would be via Ross allowing it to play on the house or car radio in her toddler years. She’s just way more likely to be aware of the Katy Perry song.
I should see if I can find the Jill Sobule track on YouTube when I get home, given all the positive opinions on it.
Billie used to think she was too good to be nice to Walky. Now, she thinks she’s not good enough to deserve Walky being nice to her. Not entirely baseless, but Billie’s been really hard on herself lately. Started when Ruth caught her lying, and got reinforced by a rant from Alice, a high school friend (or friend-with-benefits) who now wants nothing to do with Billie.
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don’t s’pose that works for “Tonight I’m Fucking You” does it
married couples get to say whatever they want to each other, jesus cant do squat
http://www.theonion.com/article/local-lutheran-minister-loves-to-fuck-his-wife-854
Wha-What did I just read?
I believe they call it satire.
The Onion is a satirical newspaper. It’s all they do.
It really gets hilarious when offical news groups picks up on their stories and reports it as if they report is based on reality.
Like when a Chinese web news outlet reported with sincerity that Kim Jong-Un had been reported Sexiest Man Alive.
http://www.theonion.com/article/kim-jong-un-named-the-onions-sexiest-man-alive-for-30379
The problem is, these days, reality is just Onion stories from like four years ago.
Hah, not even that long, sometimes: http://www.theonion.com/blogpost/fuck-everything-were-doing-five-blades-11056 in 2004 and http://money.cnn.com/2005/09/14/news/fortune500/gillette/ in 2005.
Satire is dead, and we killed it. We killed it mercilessly.
“Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.” Tom Lehrer
i love you jen
I guess you didn’t get the memo from Pope John Paul II. It’s still demeaning to the value of marriage to view your wife with concupiscence in your heart.
If he didn’t get to have fun, why should anybody else?
As if Joyce’s mom would heed anything said by the Pope.
Unless you’re catholic, you generally don’t care what the pope says. Loooots of variations on Christian.
Can I view her with tumescence in my penis?
I know they call them one-eyed trouser snakes, but I’m pretty sure you can’t actually view anything with one.
Sadly, one-eyed trouser snakes are naturally blind after spending most of their lives in the dark.
Not a very useful eye if it spends 90% of its time in pants or underwear (depending on whether you sleep nude or not). And when you do get a view of something other than cotton, it’s often shit.
The disadvantages of being a penis: your next door neighbor is an asshole, your two best friends are nuts, and your only entertainment is being stuck in slimy, smelly cave and forced to do push-ups until you puke.
…Or “Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You Tonight.”
Just one thing for this… http://www.agetec.org/debate/wp-content/triple-facepalm-picard-543.jpg
“You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals, so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.”
It-It’s a song about animals. Yeah, and animals didn’t eat from the tree of life so they are sinless so it’s okay!
Yeah, and Lil Sean’s “Ass” is about donkeys.
Specifically the one Joseph and Mary rode to Bethlehem. It’s practically a hymn.
Or Balam’s talking donkey! That’s a great and weird biblical story…
If I recall, the donkey was smarter than Balam.
And then it had babies with a dragon, but they were married so that’s okay.
Or that might have been a different talking donkey, theology’s not my best subject.
I’m pretty sure the Book of Ogre isn’t considered canon.
It was retconned out by Kingdome Come.
It would significantly improve the song.
Joyce’s Mom totes has a copy of 50 Shades in her nightstand, doesn’t she.
If they’re anything like they were in the other universe there’s a whole side to them that Joyce is currently blissfully unaware of.
Yep, in the other universe, it wasn’t 50 shades, it was the Kama Sutra. Or, as her parents called it, the really good book.
No, there’s unequivocal premarital hanky-panky in there. The source material, on the other hand…
Now it’s College party for Walky
This cannot end well.
I seriously hope Walky’s alcohol tolerance is the same in this continuity. We’ve seen the effect it has on his sister already.
His “end” will not be well.
That’s a loophole big enough for ZZ Top to slip through.
“Wait a minute, this sounds like rock and or roll…”
“Hey Marge, remember when we used to make out to this hymn in my dad’s car?”
I don’t care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I got my plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car.
Comes in colors pink and pleasant,
Glows in the dark ’cause it’s iridescent,
Take it with you when you travel far!
Not that I’m complaining, but are any of their songs NOT about sex? Although, “Tube Snake Boogie” is supposedly about surfing. Riiiiiiight.
“Jesus Just Left Chicago” springs to mind. That’s the only one I can think of, though.
Driving While Blind was about DUI…
Major values dissonance on that one. Harmless fun in the ’70’s, completely inappropriate today.
I think “Stages”. And probably “Thug”. Maybe “Delirious”, but I’m not sure about that one.
Who? ZZ Top or Boyz II Men?
If the latter, I can name at least 3 off the top of my head. If the former? I have no earthly idea.
Same question regarding Prince.
I remember back about 1979 or so, a group of us were swacked out of our minds on beer and Wild Turkey, watching an old Patrick Wayne “Sinbad” movie with claymation monsters – with the sound turned off and a ZZ Top album playing in the background.
It worked surprisingly well. I recommend it.
“TV Dinners” maybe.
Literal LOL.
At least Joyce’s mom has good taste in music…?
There’s not enough alcohol in the world to wash away that comment is there
That’s why they invented Draino.
…that was already funnier than it should be, but with that gravatar… Ouch.
This is perfect.
Washing away your gastrointestinal tract doesn’t count.
Sure it does! Without a functioning GI system to support it, the brain is guaranteed to be unable to retain that information for long! It’s also guaranteed to be unable to live for long, but that’s a minor detail.
Walky finished his chips already, didn’t he?
I’d like to imagine he has them hidden in his giant hoodie pocket for later.
I know I wasn’t the only person to do that!
…It works well with Oreos, when your mom says you can’t have any more because dinner’s almost ready.
Along with some sushi, no doubt.
Nice one.
At first I read it as Walky hid them in actual hood of the hoodie. Though I guess he’d probably do that too.
When you put the hood on it’s like a rain of Nachitos…brb gonna go invent the greatest thing ever!
I…. may have already done something similar to that. ‘Cept with peanuts >.>
As long as they’ve been shelled should be fine…but if not you may need the hospital. Unless you’re like an elephant.
Naw they were still in the shell. I had a bag of them and put them in my hoodie since it didn’t have pockets and I didn’t want to carry the bag. Then I forgot about it when I went to put up my hood later.
…It’s going to be soft-serve all over again, isn’t it?
That’s for beer.
Most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. But, then….
Really? Were you in a coma during the entire 2012 Presidential campaign or something?
American** presidential campaign. Not everyone on this site is from America/gives a crap about American politics/was old enough to be interested in politics 3 years ago.
True, but Real Amercuns really. Just. Do. Not. Care. Bout. You. Sorry. No wait, Real Amercuns are sorry bout nothin. So, meh.
If you want to be picky, that would be “United States” election, not American. There are two continents named America, and even the northern one is shared with other countries.
But whether you cared or not, our pervasive media obsession blanketed the planet with some of the highest-quality stupidity ever seen for over a year. And that stuff was broadcast. I expect we’ll eventually have to apologize to galactic civilization about that.
That would be overly picky, in my opinion, Rich. The formal names of almost any country on the globe look like “State of ___,” “Republic of ___,” or “Kingdom of ___.” There’s also, officially, “United States of Mexico” and the “Federated States of Micronesia,” which no one thinks should not be called Mexico and Micronesia. So, why don’t we get to claim “America” and be “Americans”?
Meh. I was poking fun at Just Saying for objecting to my not being specific enough I an offhand joke about our obnoxious politicians, in part by not being specific enough myself. Not worth arguing about.
Our southern neighbor is properly translated as the United Mexican States though, not the US of M. Bit like if we were the United American States – close, but not quite right. Calderon tried to get the name changed to just Mexico a few years back, but it didn’t take AFAIK.
Plus, most of Latin America refers to us at estadounidense, which you could roughly translate to ‘United States-ians’. Granted, they also refer to us as americanos (and gringos, but that’s similar to calling us ‘Yankees’). Then, to make matters more confusing, the Brazilians like to call us norte-americanos, as if we’d actually managed to conquer Canada and Mexico (we’ve tried in the past, and partially succeeded in the latter case).
Couldn’t it also be translated as Mexican United States?
Not quite the same thing. The only other country that claims the name of the continent it resides upon is Australia, and that’s because most of that continent is the Commonwealth of Australia.
But, the convention now is that US citizens are referred to as ‘Americans’ (there’s precious little else to choose when we call ourselves the ‘United States of America’). At least we can usually distinguish when we’re talking about the continents (‘the Americas’, ‘North America’, ‘South America), unlike Australia.
I tried typing “United States of America” everywhere I was referring to the country once. It made for some very wordy paragraphs. After a while I ended up just abbreviating it to “America” because my fingers got tired of typing. Which is what most people end up doing from the start, because they’re not humorless pedants.
One tricky thing about this that’s not necessarily obvious is that even though the supercontinent of which “North America” and “South America” are subdivisions is called “The Americas” in English, it really is called “America” in most other languages.
Except that the United States has no elections. Even for President, the states have 50 elections on the same day to elect delegates to The Electoral College, who then get to vote for President. Cause we live ina juryrigged — not to mention gerrymandered — 18th Century Rube Goldberg Federal Republic.
Careful Walky.
Is Billie not wearing pants?
Who needs them?
Depends on if you’re in England or America. Though I suppose Billie is in America isn’t she.
Although even in England she still may not be…
Sounds like you are confusing England for France.
You don’t NEED pants in England on account of ”pants” being British for underwear.
Wait what.
Nope. In England “pants” are what they call underwear. What Americans call “pants” English people call “Trousers”.
So in England “pants” are really a personal choice. But in America it’s kind of obvious if you aren’t wearing your “pants”.
And in France, sans culotte!
‘Cos no one in France wears the underpants? (Possibly NSFW, depending on your workplace’s policy on pixelated cartoon winkies.)
Is there a Japanese fetish/kink about pixilated cartoon winkies?
Everyone knows that at a good party you eventually lose your pants. Billie is hoping this will become a good party if she’s proactive.
On the next Slipshine: Pantsless Billie does an Orgie!
I’ve been asking myself that for awhile. She probably has on shorts or something, but a boy can dream.
Or a lesbian. Don’t forget the lesbians.
Or the Bisexuals, for that matter.
No one will forget the lesbians while Becky is around ….
I have but one question…
where was she keeping that flask?
I’m pretty sure she conjured it through sheer will.
Blast, beaten to it.
Clearly, characters in all forms of media, especially those of the comical variety, and especially frequent consumers of alchohol posses their own little pocket dimension with which they can carry a flask of their favorite alchoholic beverage.
A pocket, I assume. There are…other options, but I’d rather not think about it…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFtHjV4c4uw
In her Victoria’s Secret Compartment naturally.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/VictoriasSecretCompartment
Know how cartoon characters can keep things like hammers in a place called Hammerspace?
With Billie it’s more like Hammeredspace.
Beat me to it. +1 interwebs to you, Doctor
Billie’s the Booze Fairy!
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Hammerspace
Yup
A female friend of mine with a similar body type to Billie once successfully concealed my airsoft pistol on her person on a dare, while wearing nothing more than a t-shirt and jeans. Suffice it to say that while I was certain I knew where it was hidden, going after it would have probably compromised the friendship between not only us, but me and her husband as well.
Mrs. Animal routinely conceals an actual pistol on her person while wearing a t-shirt and jeans. It’s not at all hard.
Ponytail.
She was keeping it in Flask Space.
Funny you should ask.
This is why I drink…
I drink to make other people interesting.
Walky is endlessly endearing to me, not sure why. Especially since he failed that math quiz, but even before that I think I’ve been a fan. Hm ^_^
I liked him since he hucked an action figure at Dorothy’s head in their first class together.
Where did Billie have that hip flask stowed?
Same place where Joyce stored a giant laser cannon in its walky
Giant Laser Cannon Space?
I would fucking love it if Billie would move beyond this “I hate who I am” thing to something like “I want to be something I don’t hate”. Its a serious waste of a good epiphany there.
Also, she’s clearly extremely helpful. She’s already provided Walky with the most effective means to get through this party. Friends don’t let friends go to a Joyce party sober.
Yay! Walky and Billie bonding!
“Who’s that girl?”
“That’s Ramona Flowers.”
I grew up Christian, and as you know, they have high standards. Which is to say, everything comes with multiple standards and you’ve got to stack them to make room.
I may steal that line. Thanks.
“What is in Billie’s flask, and what proof is it?” are two questions that I’d like to see answered in forthcoming comics.
At least 120% I would guess.
Well, it has to give HER a buzz, so obviously it has a power level of over 9000.
Face. Palm.
Would this be Joyces lamest comment to date?
Honey, I think it’s about an accordion…
It goes in and out and in and out
UH EXCUSE YOU IT’S BOYZ WITH A Z NOT AN S. Actually I don’t really care I just thought I should be a brat.
Anyway, Billie come on. Get past this whole too cool for Walky phase you’re in. I don’t understand it. Also, is this Walky’s first drink? Haha Joyce is gonna be piiiiiiissed.
I don’t think it’s a ‘too cool for you’ thing I think it’s more of ‘I’m depressed and just want you to forget I’m here’ thing
I’m pretty sure her current phase is “I’m too horrible for real friends”.
But yes, she should still get past it.
So they’re actually greenskins from Warhammer 40K, then?
CLOSE YOUSE OEYES, MAKE TH’ WISH
AN’ BLOW OUT THER CANDLE-LIGHT!
‘CAUSE TONOIGHTS IS JUS’ YER’ NOIGHT
WE’S GONNA CELEBRATE ALL THROUGH THE NOIGHT!
Oi, needs more dakka!
Waaagh, and stuff.
…. Where’d Billie get the flask from?
From her bum.
Hammerspace
Victoria’s Secret Compartment.
Yes actually I wouldn’t be surprised if she was holding it between her boobs.
Same.
What else has she got in there?
More alcohol.
Yay, drunk Walky. Cause he probably holds alcohol about as well as Sal (not well).
I wonder what Billie’s booze du jour is. Obviously something that goes well with cola.
Cinnamon schnapps! perfect with real Coca Cola.
Rum?
Pretty sure it’s anything she can get her hands on, but I believe she has been depicted drinking whiskey before (the night she attempted to wait up to make Sal sign the roommate agreement).
I really, really love this strip, because this is one of my favorite kind of gags, and the expressions in the final panel are priceless.
I worry about where drunk Billie and Walky will lead but that’s a worry for tomorrow’s update, because this update I just find really, really funny.
Dorothy’s there, so it presumably can’t go all that wrong for Walky. Unless he blurts something about being unworthy of her because of his math exam.
Well have you heard of Willis’ Law? It’s sort of like the big brother to Murphy’s Law
Anything that can go wrong, most definitely will go wrong every time the opportunity arises?
Thought it was “What can go wrong will go wrong, and what can’t go wrong will find a way to do so anyway.”
*facepalm* Ruth not worried about Joyce’s party.
Sends Billie to report back. Billy creates drunk!walky.
Well, it’s a great way of answering the question of whether or not there will be a problem.She sent Billie, so there will be a problem!
Well, Billie will be fine, thanks to her
steelalcoholic liver. But Walky will make this party interesting again, until he passes out.Wait until he hs to run puke in the shared bathroom where Sarah hides.
Billie… she cares…. she shares, and she shares because she cares.
Joyce can be DJ at my next party
Joyce’s playlist is awfully Kimmy Schmidt-ish, tho I may be off a decade.
Would Dorothy frown on Walky underage drinking? She’s generally more accepting of most things than Joyce, but I don’t know if she’ll cut the Walkster some slack for something that’s technically illegal.
Also calling that Walky is going to spill the beans about his 26 when drunk.
Im surprised that Billie is willing to share her booze like that.
Billie isn’t made of stone. Some things are best forgotten, and Billie has a ready supply of brain bleach.
You know with this strip I never know what is going to be a quick gag, and what is going to cause a weeks worth of drama.
Them’s the perks of being an Internet comic.
Boyz II Men’s hit single “Quick I Think The Kid’s Asleep”
Just behind their classic “The Kids are eating ice cream outside, we have like 5 minutes”
And the B-side ‘Shut The Door, They Won’t Hear Us If We’re Quiet’.
Someone’s right. That is surprisingly generous of Billie.
Okay David- can I call you David?
I’m dense. Where can I find your toy reviews? They were one of my favorite parts of Shortpacked, and I really miss them because they don’t run in the sidebars here. Please help a hapless wayward fan of your work and direct me in the appropriate direction? Athankew.
You really are a master of this variable paneled strip style of storytelling. It is often a surprising pleasure but always deftly delivered. You have practiced long and hard at this, and we’re catching you in your stride. You’ve got all of the character designs and characterizations down and your backgrounds are second nature by now. You work weeks and months ahead because they all speak so clearly and interact so well and plotlines occur to you, presenting themselves with ease. Which you unfold patiently for the audience.
It is a genuine joy to watch you enjoy yourself this much while you enjoy commercial success as well. I think you are the American dream of comics. “Work hard, make something good and you will succeed.”
All that plus be your own boss too.
Well, if you go on to the ‘ShortPacked!’ site, you’ll find that the toy reviews are now the main thing and the comic is on the side.
you will also find DAB.
Praise be to him.
Dab dab dab…. Dab.
*facepalm*
Oh snap she broke out Boys II Men. This party is getting serious.
You can listen to anything as long as your mother approves.
“Lick it by God-des and She is totally fine as long as you pretend it’s about heterosexual married couples!” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Why2n9XtlNw (absolutely NOT SAFE FOR WORK AT ALL and sadly some words are censored)
Just going to say “Garfunkel and Oates”. Most of you can take it from there….
So is there any Luther Vandross in this mix?
You can’t even pretend that Luther is married. (“Creep, creep, creep, creep . . . “)
Barry. White.
You don’t know horror until you’ve heard a 5 year old girl sing “I’ll Make Love to You” at an amusement park karaoke kiosk.
Or your 6 year old son singing “I’ve got all the right junk in all the right places…”
Interesting take on “All the Right Moves”.
Children love all sorts of songs that they couldn’t possibly understand the lyrics to.
I’ve got an honorary niece who when she was five or so really loved all the songs from Rocky Horror.
A childrens choir singing “When I Think About You I Touch Myself”. It exists, it is nauseating.
Well clearly it’s about thinking about god, and one hand touching the other in prayer.
Welp, that’s it. Walky’s gonna be out for the night.
Reminds me of how my mom loved Elton John music until he came out. Then it was all smashy smashy to all the CD’s.
I was watching my Muppet Show DVDs a while back, and when the Elton John episode came on I called through my mum who’s a bit of a fan.
When he performed Crocodile Rock in a feathered outfit and rhinestone swimming cap, she rolled her eyes and said “Can you believe he was supposed to be in the closet in the seventies?”
Likewise, “Nikita” is a man’s name, despite the music video constantly showing a woman. It’s like Elton John was never very closeted, but people around him kept having to build up those walls.
I don’t actually know what song you’re talking about, but I was confused for quite a while when I heard people speaking of Nikita Khrushchev because I thought he was a woman.
That must have been hilarous (seen from a safe distance, anyway)
If only.. from a distance. .-.
I heard a story once of someone who threw out all their Wham CDs when they found out George Michael was gay… and replacing them with Ricky Martin.
Is this the storyline in which we get to see Joyce drunk?
Doubtful. I don’t think she’ll be able to touch the stuff for a long while yet.
Yey! Billie and Walky are bonding
This is shaping up to be a… Good? Bad? Memorable?
…this is shaping up to be a night.
Burst into laughter when I realized what was happening and why in the last panel. Thank you Mr. Willis, that was great. He doesn’t even need to ask her, she just pours him some. XD
He does hold the glass out, though ….
Sometimes you don’t need words.
Oh, Billie.
Okay, no one has said this, but how often have you ended a party with a hook-up? Is this the night for Joyce and Becky?
Ethan and Danny is more likely than Joyce and Becky. But so is like, any other pairing ever. The Joyce and Becky ship crashed at the dock. Never sailed for even a little.
The SS Joyce Becky spent almost a decade under construction, but tragically left port on its maiden voyage with only half its crew and passengers. The ship didn’t even make it out of the harbor before it capsized and sank like a stone.
10 August 1628, maiden voyage of the hugely powerful, innovative new warship Vasa, commisioned by the King of Sweden as a weapon with which to dominate the Baltic Sea: “Vasa sank, after sailing barely 1300 meters”, within Stockholm harbor. (Amazingly, no one was hung or beheaded over the loss. In the 1960s Vasa was recovered from the bottom of Stockholm harbor and is now the centerpiece of a very cool museum.)
Thanks for that, as I am now stuck reading about nautical terminology and Swedish naval history all night.
:-0
Wait …
Fill it up and keep it coming, Billie, and maybe sensible people can make it through that party without resorting to violence…
I hate to say it, but this is the type of party I’d enjoy a lot more. Every time I went to a “real” college party I felt so overwhelmed and completely out of place.
Joyce, pushing people to alcoholism since 2015.
Whats Beckys playlist like?
♫I kissed a girl, I liked it…♫
Anything by God-Des and She.
Seriously? The Katy Perry knockoff version? Boo. Jill Sobule did it first, and better.
“Kissed a girl, her lips were sweet…”
I dunno. That’s from 20 years ago, and Becky’s about 18?
Joyce’s Boyz II Men track has the explanation that her mother listened to it. Conversely, the only way Becky would have heard Jill Sobule’s song would be via Ross allowing it to play on the house or car radio in her toddler years. She’s just way more likely to be aware of the Katy Perry song.
I should see if I can find the Jill Sobule track on YouTube when I get home, given all the positive opinions on it.
You’re the one quoting the Perry version, not Joyce or her parents. I say again, boo. Shoddy imitation.
“I kissed a girl and dad pulled me out of college”
“Papa dont preach.”
I love me some of that rock’n’roll!
I forget, why does Billie not want Walky being nice to her?
Billie used to think she was too good to be nice to Walky. Now, she thinks she’s not good enough to deserve Walky being nice to her. Not entirely baseless, but Billie’s been really hard on herself lately. Started when Ruth caught her lying, and got reinforced by a rant from Alice, a high school friend (or friend-with-benefits) who now wants nothing to do with Billie.
This
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/taste/
this
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/03-up-all-night-to-get-vengeance/orbiting/
this
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/03-up-all-night-to-get-vengeance/joycespeak/
and this
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/dramahurricane/
_
Archive diving is fun!
How do you find particular strips so fast?
Don’t look now Billie, but I think your ass-flab is definitely hanging out.
I still ship Billie and Walky.
I’d rather ship the ship that Walky and Billie both support more than Billie/Walky, Billie/Sal
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-2/01-pajama-jeans/gross/
drunk walky? drunk walky.