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Sophia_Nyx 
⚧️ @sophianyx.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Onyx | 
Emerald | 
Obsidian ⚧️ 
@onua-ryder.neocities.org ⋅ 2d
Tim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social ⋅ 4m
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 4d
Reuters Legal @legal.reuters.com ⋅ 2d
the_dude @lebowski76.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 4d
Puff the Magic Hater @mskellymhayes.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
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Barb O. Saur 
A A A A A A H H H H H h H H
If comics like these start becoming a trend, Willis is going to give me heart attacks solely via his writing. There are only so many characters he can go through before we run out of nervous tension to culminate.
Monday:
Joe: Joyce, I love you.
Tuesday:
Mike: Ethan, I love you.
Wednesday:
Sal: Fuckface, I love you.
I’d love to see the Sal one happen lmao
Maybe if Fuckface bites Malaya
Sal: Just give me a couple minutes to MURDER MALAYA, and we can be together forever…
Mike wasn’t so much “Ethan, I love you” as “Klytus, I’m bored”.
“What plaything can you offer me today” has suddenly taken on new meaning. :-/
Thursday:
Fuckface lives up to its name.
Malaya has a mouth baby.
Go on…
How can you NOT love Fuckface? He’s a luttle cutie lizard, yes he is.
Did you mean
Flash! A A A A A A H H H H H h H H
?
–Dave, _see searches related to Queen_
Thursday:
Captain Khan: My Hawkmen, I love you.
Now DIIIIIVVVEEE!!!!
“Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren’t naked right now.”
Oh good, you’re back.
And using Joyce as an Avatar. Amusingly appropriate, from what I’ve seen…
Well I mean, I heard she was off terrorizing sheep, or something.
Where did I go?
Look, I don’t know who told you that you were allowed to take breaks from commenting on here soon after updates, but they were wrong, apparently.
I feel like there should be a Cotton-Eye Joe joke in here somewhere.
Been a long time, been a long time gone
(Several hours, at least)
“I know.”
You mean The Empire Strikes Back, but that line just makes me want to play the Yello song.
Huh? I was thinking SAO Abridged.
That might be kinda obscure for some people on here, star wars is more spot on, lol
Wait, are you trying to imply people haven’t seen SAO Abridged? That sounds preposterous, are you sure that’s a thing?
*Googles SAO Abridged*
Huh, I figured it would be an encyclopedia or something…
SAO abridged is my favorite show, and I am so pumped to see them correct the fairy dance arc.
I’m impressed how they pretty throughly nuked the incest issue from orbit. Also, explained the main character’s least impressive social traits.
Well, my guess was close, it had something to do with SAO. Aaaaaand you have given me something else I didn’t need to monopolize what little free time I have. What little I have seen looks interesting so far.
No hesitations…
Oh, walky, please don’t do this…
Danny looks like he wants walky to do this
Screw these people, I wanna see Mike and Ethan make out
A strip of panels about Walky and Dorothy’s relationship interspersed with panels of Mike and Ethan making out.
Yup. Every once in a while, my libido has terrible taste.
You kidding? Did you see that last panel of Mike? I can totally get why people are seduced by him despite their better judgement. Willis really nailed the art there.
Personally I’d attribute Mike’s seduction to the smooth as wine one liners, but sure, that was some nice facework.
Especially the parts involving his tongue, ey?
That said, I did in fact mean that Willis did a great job in having the art portray how well the one-liner was delivered. I really could imagine Mike actually silkily sliding those words out- the words delivered with all his usual confidence and aloofness, but with his usual naughty playfulness suddenly taking on fresh, more inviting tones, and the whole affair tinged with just enough of a new inclusion of teasing tenderness to highlight all his best traits while promising something new and special.
His usually straight and standoffish demeanor suddenly softening, his hand gently yet firmly sliding to cup your chin, his face flushing with genuine warmth, his breath hot on your cheek..
And then, your body quivering against his undeniable hold, he leans in to catch you with those assertive eyes, and you see only yourself reflected within them. Slowly, he runs his mouth just over your skin, warmth tickling enticingly across flesh, bringing his lips up to your ear- and then, your flushed body feeling as though it’ll overload in anticipation, his words come commandingly yet invitingly forth..
Glad he got this out of the way before the other thing he’s about to do.
Dorothy’s face is also what my face looked like.
Faz the Great cannot take a damn hint, can he.
“This chart explains why I cannot wait until mid-February the many ways in which I am great.”
So is Walky saying this because he actually means it, because he thinks Dorothy would be better off without him, or some combination thereof?
I’m going with:
He genuinely loves her, and he thinks she would be better off without him, and he is steeling himself up to deliver the “we need to break up for your sake” speech. Whether or not he actually gets to deliver it is in the hands of DYW, but I’m guessing that the narrative arc will best be furthered by him awkwardly getting about halfway through that speech before Dorothy cuts him off with some kind of
bombshellnarrative escalation.Seconded. Alternatively – “Our relationship can be put on hold – I’ve got no problem waiting for a woman like you”, though more in Walky-ese, likely involving a toy getting thrown.
Walky’s already exceeded his toy-throwing allotment for the day. If he throws another, he’ll lessen their emotional impact.
True, his arm is probably getting tired and that would soften the blow
Alternatively, because everything is awful: He breaks up with her on the stairs, in a twisted echo of Dorothy breaking up with Danny.
Oh god, Willis is so going to do this, isn’t he?
I lost count, but I think it’s been about 51 days since we last had a “Damn You Willis” moment. Seems like we’re about due.
We need a “Damn You, Willis!” counter.
“It has been 51 Days since the last Damn You, Willis.”
Tomorrow:
“It has been 0 Days since the last Damn You, Willis!”
Like, every time [X] number of “Damn You Willis” votes are reached for a single strip, the counter resets to 0? That’s.. that’s kinda brilliant. I think we need that.
That was supposed to be:
“…until mid-February to explain to you the many ways…”
Clearly, unlike Faz, I am not great. Especially in the editing-before-posting department.
Of course, this will probably all be moot by the time I have posted this correction.
Yup.
I am confused. Where does Faz come from all of a sudden?
I’m fairly sure that’s a question that’s frequently asked, along with “And how can we send him back?”
I’d suggest informing Death Watch that there is a Genestealer on the loose.
You should take a look at the next book title…
The title for the next storyline has to do with Faz, and originally this strip was showing as being in that storyline.
He came from a brief anomaly in the space-time continuum, and presumably that’s where he returned to. Never mind. Nothing to see here. Pay no attention to the accidental foreshadowing.
And definitely (fnord) do NOT click on the (fnord) “Archives…” navigation menu on the left (fnord) and scroll to the end.
YESSSS (until the other foot drops, in which case ;-; )
I really hope Walky has changed his mind about breaking up with Dorothy.
Oh, Walky…
If only you had someone who loved you back.
She does love him back, I’m sure. But being with him is not good for her, and he is big enough to see that. And, I feel certain, she is intelligent enough to recognise it, too.
This is entirely the wrong take. Killing yourself by cramming a 40-hour workload into every 24-hour day is what’s not good for her.
And Walky with his silly cartoons and stuff was the only stress relief she’s been getting. If she looses that she will land in hospital before long.
…I was just making a Frozen joke.
You threw a snowball which turned into an avalanche. Good job!
Walky: Let me go, let me go, go away and slam the door.
It has thawed.
No, no, Hover Text, it’s “but we only have 14 hours to save the Earth!”
Get your ’80s movie quotes right. ;P
Lasers hit the bunker, and droids surround the base
Do you really still believe that failing Math class is the worst case?
Yeah, that confused me a bit. I don’t think it’s meant to be an original Walkyverse reference, either..?
Anyone gonna mention that tight Queen reference in the alt-text? ‘Cause now “Flash” is going to be stuck in my head for the next twelve hours.
Done, and done!
–Dave, there are far worse things that could be stuck there. Mike will be happy to whisper some in your ear
ps: I like the quiet continuity of Joe disappearing stage left in panel 3. I also like the subtle indrawn breath Dorothy takes in the last panel. “only what’s necessary”.
Agreed on the PSs for this strip’s drawing.
Also, does Joe’s absence mean he didn’t hear Walky?
WORRIED
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-8/02-this-is-the-way-that-we-love/driven/
(HOPEFUL PUPPY NOISES)
Well, damn. Guess Valentine’s Day is coming early this year.
Naw, we’ve got the Billie/Ruth drama bomb to look forward to for that
I’ve a pre-Damn-you-Willis primed and ready to go.
OH NO
I FEEL LIKE THIS IS GOING TO BE “I LOVE YOU BUT I’M NOT ‘IN LOVE’ WITH YOU”
I went from “yay, Joe and Joyce are interacting! He’s even carrying her books!” to “oh no, Dorothy… Wait, ‘I love you’!?” in a matter of seconds so now I’m suffering from major mood whiplash. Willis, please, have mercy.
In a twist, this strip was actually presented in a nonlinear narrative manner, and the two people Amber is going to break up are Dorothy and Walky.
Are they fighting or fucking? We still don’t know.
Big if true.
Revisiting that strip, I just have to say “I’m not even good at being a jackass” is the Most Depression Sentence Ever.
Right as I was reading this, Power of Love came on in the playlist I was listening to. Poor timing, iTunes shuffle.
Was that The Power of Love, The Power of Love or The Power of Love? I mean they’re each very, very different songs and imply vastly different emotional responses.
I’d like to believe it’s this cover of The Power of Love… because it’s pretty cool… and heartbreaking. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl6Ery4Q_uE
Believe it or not, you are 100% correct.
Well as power ballads go you can’t go wrong with Queen.
WHA
31 days and counting down. Ticky tocky Walky.
What happens in 31 days?
The Valentine’s Day Strip.
Also, Valentine’s Day.
With the anti-Valentine’s-Day events. Seriously, check the archives for what always happens on Valentine’s Day around here.
Careful, Walky. I told my girlfriend that once and she shot me down like the Red Baron.
Oooooooh.
This made me laugh so much.
And now I want pizza, you jerk.
(:P)
She frowned like Freschetta’s,
Told him off like Totino’s,
Tossed him out like Tony’s,
Ditched him like Digiornio’s,
and didn’t even stop to ask what he wanted on his Tombstone….
..and so he ended up out of Amy’s Kitchen, by way of Newman’s Own and a Screamin’ Sicilian, into a California Pizza Kitchen?
Did it go something like this?
ot exactly, ut either wa it was a shot to the heart.
Not exactly, but either way it was a shot to the heart.
……What?
Dorothy knowing Walky the way she does should either immediately ask “What did you do?” or just start running for a bombshelter without another word.
So Walky FINALLY tells Dorothy he loves her, after all that prodding and him refusing to say it for so long.
… RIGHT AFTER he accepts on garbage roof that he’s going to have to break up with her.
….
Dorothy’s right. She’s in love with an idiot.
And… Boom goes the dynamite…
I usually don’t think of saying “I love you” as a bad thing, but this is definitely a bad “I love you”.
Hey, hey, HEY WALKY!!! That’s not the kind of language we expect from a leading garbage roof member!!!
…also, I’m proud of you, little buddy.
Dorothy: I said, *not now,* Walky!!
(Okay, that’s totally not her response, but in an(other) alternate universe . . . .)
“Three hours? You can get plenty of studying done in three hours”
Do you write these mouseover texts when you draw the comics? Because the whole ‘save the world’ thing on the day after the entire state of Hawaii briefly thought the world was ending is almost too perfect.
Suddenly the hovertext doesn’t work on my iPad
.
What is driving Dorothy? Did she come to the conclusion she has to drop Walky and is trying to avoid the issue? Is she grappling with severe self-doubt because she’s “failing”? What is going on in her head.
(And Willis let us hanging about Leslie. It was such a nice preview panel, promising good things in Leslie’s life.)
“but we only have three hours to save earth” <= hovertext
Thanks.
The alt text made me think of this song. I literally haven’t listened to that in years.
Dang smash cut to other subplot.
DON’T MAKE ME CRY. DON’T DO IT WILLIS. I’M WARNING YOU.
unrelated
but when did willis change the way he draws walky’s hoodie? for some reason my brain can’t parse it as a hood. more like…a chunky cowl neck. with strings, i guess.
it’s not necessarily a bad look but it’s very different from how it used to be
i mean, dorothy is literally also wearing a hoodie in this very strip and hers is drawn the old way so what’s with walky’s. is it SUPPOSED to be some kind of turtleneck hoodie? we’ve seen it from the back and it’s definitely got some kind of hood. this is so irrational but it’s gonna bug me forever. WHAT’S WITH THE HOODIE.
Some hoodies have differently-shaped hoods.
and as always, the simplest explanation is the one that will make me feel dumb
I think he’s wearing a high collar hoodie. If he pulled it up over his head, the bottom front would be covering his chin. He would look like some anime mage.
Please put your hood up, Walky.
Or look like Kenny.
…Awww?
Can I awww about this? This is a good thing, right?
I think that there are two distinct ‘Aww!’ moments here. The obvious one is Walky and Dorothy and I strongly hope that both of them use this realisation to move away from destructive and self-loathing behaviours.
The other is Joe and Joyce. I think that she’s the first woman whom he’s become attracted to mostly on an emotional level rather than a physical level (mostly because his initial physical approach was rejected). He’s trying to be a friend right now and it’s actually quite funny how Joyce is trying to keep independent even when she needs help.
I wonder if Joe is trying to protect Joyce from Sarah’s schemes by giving Joyce an alternate boyfriend?
Walky said it about Dorothy (to) Becky way back when Becky came on the scene. I was wondering if he ever said it directly to Dorothy.
Looks like a bombshell dropped.
That same thought (about Joe trying to distract Joyce from Jacob and thus foil Sarah) has crossed my mind . . .
im still shook over about joyces toenail
That’s not breaking up. Unless you were going to do it in one of the worst possible ways
Smarting of Age: A webcomic about always making the best choices by David “thank you” Willis.
What? You mean this isn’t the best of all possible worlds?
HOPE YOU STICK WITH THIS MOTIF AND NOT YOUR ROOF ONE.
Panel one was published as the preview panel for tomorrow. Was a strip withdrawn?
I just changed the order.
Remember the last time someone said they loved her…… it did not end well. I hope Walky didn’t Danny himself just so she would dump him on purpose. Dang it man, not like this….
“But it’s time we stop this”
(also : well played, alt text. Well played.)
“I love you. That’s why we have to split.”
Points for not buggering off like a ghost.
#unexpectedflashgordon
But… these are the wrong stairs for a break-up.
Aha! THAT explains why he said “I love you” instead.
And tomorrow we’re going to get a version of “it’s not you, it’s me”, aren’t we? At least this time, it’s meant.
I mean, it’s not TRUE, but it’s meant.
Shiiiit, how did I not know of this until now?:
https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/space-odyssey-the-video-game-science/x/18008780#/
Does anyone know when this campaign ends? I can’t find an end date in this thing.
Aw, this is so sweet and sad. Dorothy’s shock reminds me of how she talked about not wanting a serious relationship because of transferring to Yale, becoming President, saving the world, and so on.
What should happen next is Ashton Kutcher stepping out and going, “Dorothy, you have been punked!”
What a whirlwind past couple of days, Willis!
As much as i want to see Joe and Joyce together its now looking, to me anyway, like Joe is thinking and acting more like a big-brother
Which is good but it means a romance will be way off in the future plus it could lead to Joe becoming over-protective and smothering
Nope no personal experience with this at all…
Those benches (and the foliage you can see through them) came out really nicely.
Actually there is something about panels 3-4 where the background just looks really awesome. I think the colours and the perspective are just really selling it.