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“How about Lilith? Lilith ok? Cthulhu? Crom?”
“Crom laughs at your ‘four winds’!”
Hmmm, demon Lilith? Or Firehawk Lilith? Because Firehawk Lilith is pretty badass.
Frasier’s Lilith. Because Bebe Neuwirth is awesome.
No argument here.
Other equally dangerous options but not offensive to Christians: Lord English, the Noble Circle of Horrorterrors, Aldrich the Devourer of Gods, Izalith, the Chaos Gods, the Old Gods of the Tevinter Empire, the Daedric Princes, the Cheese, the Wild Hunt, etc.
Knowing her northern Indiana folklore, Sarah says, “Hi, this is Alice Marble Gray“
Interestingly enough, if you Google “Alice Marble Gray”, the only result is a link to the eponymous song by the band Califone. I found this song on YouTube, listened to it, and am no more enlightened as to the nature of the legend.
My bad, I didn’t notice that Marsh’s text was a link… I am suitably educated now.
However, it’s weird that when I Googled Alice Marble Gray the Diana of the Dunes article didn’t show up.
This is probably beating a dead horse, but I did a little more digging and found that the problem was actually the fact that her name was apparently Alice MABEL Gray. You get lots of results if you search that name…
Interesting. I was doing a search for Indiana folk lore and apparently I glommed on to the one document that had this wrong name.
I chose her because Indiana Dunes is about 30 miles from La Porte, Joyce’s home town.
Dang!
Sarah: “Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!”
Plot twist: Hank enthusiastically joins in.
Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu B’loomngtn wgah’nagl fhtagn
Those pesky cultists from Innsmouth. This is Indiana’s University, not Mistkatonic.
I’ll have a gin and Miskatonic.
nuq Dajatlh jIyajbe’.
Slowly, imperceptibly, Sarah becomes the new Mike.
When they cast him down he became more powerful that they could possibly imagine.
Mike the White… privileged douchebag.
Plot twist: As soon as she’s committed to that path, the real Mike shows up again like nothing ever happened.
This isn’t Shortpacked.
No, this is the version where the Head Alien has been so successful that no-one believes he exists outside of a cartoon.
So the version where Head Alien has even the most basic level of competence, then.
Dumbing of Age Book 10: ALL HAIL SATAN! [click]
DoA Book 10:…………wWWWell NOW I definitely can’t promise that.
DoA Book 10: I Don’t Got the Brainspace For Family Stuff Right Now!
Dumbing of Age Book 10: BBZZT BBZZT
I too, hope to know someone someday where I can answer a phone call for them, snarl “All Hail Satan”, and hang up.
Know thyself.
“Hail Hydra!”
That will only offend Marvel fans, not Christians.
Cut off one Marvel fan and ten more will take their place.
Marvel fans, and jews, and BLM and a lot of other people should.
Why again is this fashist organisation of pop culture so popular? Joker, Harley, Luthor, Loki okay – but why those nazis?
Because Nazis (or even pseudoNazis) make good bad guys.
And Jews and BLM and others would only be offended if they were enough of a Marvel fan to know what you’re talking about. Most would probably just be confused.
Offending a Christian has about the same consequences as offending a Marvel fan. Someone will bluster a few quotes attached to silly names at you, you’ll ignore them, and they’ll slink off to resume monopolising your media.
To quote Lindsay Ellis, “Hail Hang Glider!”
Ahhh, memories.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/answer-2/
I swear Willis is deliberately reminding us that he still hasn’t revealed what happened to Mike yet by referencing that strip.
Yes, that’s the joke.
*plays Chris Isaak’s “Wicked Game” on the hacked Muzak, followed by “You Can’t Do A Thing To Stop Me”*
*slips in the HIM cover* ’cause extra sinister
Not going to lie, snarling “All hail Satan” to her dad sounds like fun to me. Clearly she has to do it now.
Mike did that once iirc
It was her mom, IIRC, but, yeah.
Thank you! I was really trying to remember who did that before or if I was imagining stuff. Huh. That reference to Mike is a bit ominous now
The big reveal is that Mike is in the fridge.
When they discover him …..
“Close the damn door, I’m chill-in here!”
“Young lady, you tell me immediately why my phone tries to connect to my fridge.”
“They’re in love, duh.”
See, Joyce, she probably wouldn’t have but then you went and said it.
Sarah is helping!
This is a strange experiene for everyone involved.
No, she’s helping because everyone else can’t figure out what to do and she’s too exasperated to put up with overhearing them not figure it out so she’ll just do it so that it’s over with. This is normal.
This is DOA, there is no normal.
Pretty much. Sarah is grumpy, but helpful behind that mask.
Joyce being an edgelord and not answering her phone has been one of the few reasons all of this happened. If Sarah tells her Hank has been trying to contact her to warn her about Toedad and Blaine, then Joyce will realise hse is in part responsible for Mike’s funeral in another comic series.
I am not a consequentialist, but all of this could have been avoided.
Seriously? Not answering your phone when your dad calls is being an edge lord now?
According to my dad, yes.
(Actually, he’s stills struggling to add the correct usage of the word “troll” to his vocabulary.)
I think the edgelord comment is unrelated to not answering her phone. They might be referring to her attitude with Becky at the party?
That too. After Joyce tried to break up a couple and realised she is capable of evil, she began talking shit about ideals and common decency just because she can’t accept she is a flawed human like everyone else and should accept she can make mistakes. Also, she has been avoided talking with her family for days, even Jocelyn, who she only talked to because Ethan convinced her to. I have been in college and even with my crankiness and atheism I always made sure to talk at least once with my mom to make sure I was safe. What Joyce has been doing isnt helping her case of her mom wanting her to be back home, even if Carol is a bongo.
No, what she said was that another thing her church taught her was full of shit (namely, that atheists can do whatever they want without any consequences whatsoever because no god. She realized this was full of crap because other people still have feelings and she still cared about them. Which, ah, kinda screws with the idea she’s rejecting common decency and can’t accept she’s flawed and makes mistakes but okay). She also said that since everything else they’ve taught her was full of crap, why not sexual purity? Which – good! Sexual purity and the idea you need a god to be a moral person ARE full of crap teachings and she’s absolutely right to reject them. That’s not being an edge lord. Hell, even calling her community ‘BSing b-holes’ isn’t exactly nice, but she’s still not exactly WRONG. They were BSing. The fact they sincerely believed their BS doesn’t mean they weren’t peddling bullshit and Joyce is entirely in her rights to be angry at them for ingraining it into her.
Also, she called Jocelyne like three days ago, in universe. Yes, after Ethan prompted her to, but sue the girl for not wanting to talk to her (so far as she knows) hyper religious family about her religious doubts. ESPECIALLY since the possibility of her being corrupted is EXACTLY why her mom wants to pull her out and her dad’s only defence (that she heard) was that she was ‘stronger’ than that. Considering her reasons for not answering were not feeling like it and living in mortal fear of her dad’s judgement, I don’t think it’s wrong not to answer. Family can be bad for you, even the well meaning ones like Hank. Joyce even said if it were important (like needing to know if she’s safe), her dad would’ve texted her, so it’s not like she’s missing anything vital.
At least talk to her dad, who’s a reasonable person. And Jocelyne. I didn’t realize she’d been ignoring her too.
That’s only because she wasn’t. Joyce called Joss, not the other way around. It was at Ethan’s prompting but so far as I recall, she hasn’t been ignoring Joss. And Hank’s generally reasonable nowadays, but he’s got 18 years worth of BS being pounded into Joyce’s head. She doesn’t really want to talk to him. She’s already said he’d send a text if it was important, so she has no reason to think this is something vital.
Yeah, where has she been ignoring Jocelyne?
Not answering your phone to preserve your mental health is a fucking great call (though I recommend communicating on needing space for a bit, but that’s hard). Not only is it not being an edge lord, I’m somewhat judgemental at her being pressured into this. It’s not massively less emotional labour to have your friends take the call, and more likely to evoke drama.
The fact I know this is probably serious is irrelevant.
To be honest, I think we’ve really lost sight of what “emotional labor” actually is when we’re using it to describe being distant and immature towards people who love you. Barring actual abusive situations, ghosting someone is never valid and it’s not “self-care”. Joyce isn’t a bad person, but refusing to answer all day without so much as a quick check-in or texted, “Hey, I’m okay, can’t talk right now” is not a really adult thing to do.
(I will fight for the reclamation of the term “emotional labor” even as all of my enemies gather at the gates. It’s not the same thing as emotion work! FIGHT ME, Jeff Bezos.)
I’m not actually really judging Joyce for this, to be clear, I just think we’re a little too flippant about branding unhealthy habits as “self-care”. You know what’s real self-care? Taking care of Future You. Eating ten cookies is not self-care. Cooking a healthy meal is self-care.
Preach! So happy to run into someone who knows about the difference between emotional labor and emotional work.
Different things can be healthy in different ways. Eating ten cookies at once one day because you’re depressed and cookies make you happy might not be good for your stomach, but it can be good for your mental health. And honestly, if it’s not happening super frequently, it probably won’t actually do too much harm.
Ghosting also implies an extended time period. It’s been one day. Anyone should be able to cut cords for one day.
Yeah, there’s a difference between “ghosting” somebody and just ignoring them for a little while. Not every instance of every behavior is automatically the most extreme version of itself.
Good thing nobody’s being ghosted then. Joyce doesn’t feel up to talking to her dad right now. It’s been like a day and a half. He’ll live.
No, Hank will surely perish if he doesn’t get his daughter’s attention before there’s still time. Joyce is in the wrong for taking a very small moment to focus on herself a little bit. That’s how it works.
Joyce’s parents are probably paying for her education (at least Hank), and they are still her family so she at least has to do a daily “I am still alive” so they dont call the cops or question her sanity. It’s common sense to contact family once a day, unless they are serial killers or rapists.
I talk to my parents maybe once a week and that’s fine. Different people need different levels of space, and Joyce is now learning that she needs more space than she thought.
I only started doing daily checkins with my parents in college after the junior year anxiety attack that gave them reason to both fear for my wellbeing (since I went completely off the radar and stopped attending classes or appointments, and that scared everyone involved enough to call my mom) and think I needed accountability checkins so that I wasn’t anxiety-spiralling again.
Generally speaking, I’m pretty sure daily contact isn’t the norm for college students unless that behavior’s already been set up (and based off when we’ve seen Hank and Carol call, it’s not) or something extreme happens that makes them need to institute it. And note that Amber, who had a breakdown involving stabbing a guy, doesn’t appear to be in daily contact with her mom.
Also, there’s a wide array of behavior before ‘rapists and serial killers’ that still justifies limiting contact. For example, emotional abuse. Like the ‘I will die for you’ we’ve seen Carol pull on Joyce and explicitly drawn a parallel to Toedad with in the aftermath of the car chase. Joyce is only just starting to realize her parents may not be safe people, and Hank’s steps forward are still tentative and against YEARS of stuff she’s starting to question. (Given when she went home, he and Carol were arguing about pulling her from school, I don’t think she feels safe discussing her loss of faith/pulling away from the church and I would not blame her.)
Would we consider, for example, Ruth a bad person for not wanting to check in with Clint every day? I mean, she had a breakdown and it’s only natural he’d be concerned, right?
Just because every conversation leaves her a broken down mess, that’s no excuse.
More generally, that’s part of what college is for – getting some distance from your parents, building self-reliance, learning how to cope on your own. It’s been a long time, but I doubt I even talked to my parents once a week freshman year, certainly not daily. Less in the later years, since they were out of the country generally with no phone connection.
Of course, this was back in the days of land lines, so it wasn’t so convenient.
Yes. ALL of that. (I was on board with those daily accountability checkins as well, I’ll add – because I realized I had scared everyone around me really badly and needed the contact to stay ahead of the anxiety spiral. If it becomes another obligation instead of something you think you’re benefiting from, it’s no good. Carol would very much make it an obligation.)
“Joyce’s parents are probably paying for her education”
Ooof. No. Even if they are that doesn’t mean Joyce has to do anything like that even if they’re family. Like people have said its been about a day its fine.
Yeah, that sentiment throws off all kinds of alarm bells lol.
No, it’s common sense to check for traffic before crossing the street, or to wear a jacket if the weather is chilly. Expecting your family to check in daily isn’t common sense, it’s just a habit some people have.
Yeah, especially since I doubt Joyce feels like she could express WHY she’s uncomfortable – that she’s going to have to leave the church and isn’t sure she believes at all under the fear. It wasn’t that long ago that Hank was talking shit about atheists, and the last time she spoke with him on-panel he still thought the congregation was salvageable.
(That Joyce is DEFINITELY going to burn all bridges with that congregation when she finds out about the bail fundraising and Hank will not question that decision if he knows what’s good for him is something she doesn’t know yet. God, I am looking forward to Thanksgiving.)
And as I said in my own comment, realistically there wasn’t a lot Joyce could do in the time since Hank started calling yesterday if she HAD known. Put Becky on high alert, obviously, but any kind of real security would’ve taken longer to implement than they had. And I don’t think Becky would have wanted to call off the party (between guilt and letting her shitty dad control her behavior, that would suck.) Given that… maybe putting in a protocol to ensure no one left the party alone, but even then it was hopping enough and Mike was Mike enough I’m not sure it would have been successful. Mike’s the one who chose to divert the Evil Dads from the party, and Mike made a lot of other choices knowing that, you know, roughly midnight on a college campus is always an iffy place to be on your own. (Even for a white, not-visibly-queer guy, that was a choice.) His choices aren’t on Joyce, and I’m not sure her knowing COULD have meaningfully changed what went down.
“I mean, I was just going to chant the lord’s prayer in latin like I was at a catholic mass, but yours is better.”
Say the Lord’s Prayer in Latin … but backwards.
There are easier ways to Rick Roll people, but I guess that works.
I don’t know what you mean about rickrolling people; all I know is that reciting the Lord’s Prayer backwards is supposed to be a way of summoning Lucifer.
Once I didn’t answer my dad’s call because I was making out with my spouse, (like, 21 yo married version of Joyce) and when I answered his next call he screamed at me for my disrespect in not answering his call so I don’t exactly find it realistic that Joyce just won’t answer, because the punishment could be far worse than the phone call..
I’m basically disowned now so like *shrug*
So…did he yell at you every time you lost signal and couldn’t answer too? This not only screams “unrealistic standard holding” and “control issues”, but is also just plain irrational.
People who shout about “disrespect” are rarely doing it for any rational reason, in my experience. Especially if they’re men.
Probably because before that she’s never done it, so she doesn’t know how he’d react to it.
You at least can’t do that without walky around to smooth it out immediately.
Walky’s not ready for that again. He’s done the child sacrifice, but he hasn’t had the chance to vote Democrat yet.
Aww, Joyce is avoiding him because she’s scared to consider her loss of faith and the consequences she might face from her family if she talks about it. Poor kiddo.
(Seriously, this is pretty normal College Kid Feeling Fear And Shame Overriding Sense behavior. And I’m not sure how much Joyce could’ve had set in place yesterday even if she went straight to Becky, Becky went straight to Robin, and Robin pulled the full force of her Congresswoman Privilege out against Toedad. Congresspeople don’t customarily have a protective detail, so she’d probably have to hire them and that’d take time, or call the police, which would ALSO take time.)
“Dad would have called way more” – um, like he’s doing now?
No, “way more”, not “once more”.
Phew finally! Joyce will know about Toe for brains – and also have a little more trust in her dad, emphasis on “little”.
Sarah answers the phone.
Hank: “Who are you? Where’s Joyce? Is she OK? There was something on the news today about a student found dead onm campus after falling off a fire escape, and I just wanted to make sure that it wasn’t her!”
He’s probably trying to make sure Becky knows that her father’s afoot.
(And has made bail.)
You mean her father’s atoe…
Go to your room.
Hmm? Didn’t Mike do this before?
Memlries of Mike’s antics will keep popping up like this. He’s basically a malevolent Force ghost now.
Or “memories”, as someone who proofreads their clumsy typos would say.
Nah. Memeries sounds right for this generation. ;P
Considering almost all the characters are female, shouldn’t that be “mammories”?
Well, alt text, it depends on which version of the universe we live in.
And so Bible Basher, The Cynic and Oracle join the hunt for Bad Dad Man and Toe Head.
Jeez, when did this strip turn into a superhero title? Yeah, I know: Willis is just naturally a superhero comic author and, when he tries to do slice-of-life, it ends up as a superhero title!
2010. End of the first chapter.
Uh oh, another Chekhov gun is going to be fired.
*reads the alt-text*
Prediction. In tomorrow’s strip:
“Joyce, your mother and I are getting divorced.”
That’s the next one. The current one is “Joyce, the congregation has hired this very odd man to help Ross ‘save’ Becky. Frankly, I don’t trust him and I think that you should warn her.”
In some future, Joyce will find out whatever happened to Mike. And for which she is arguably part responsible because she didn’t answer her phone. That’s not gonna be one of her happier moments.
BTW parents need to figure out how to make the best use of what is very limited bandwidth to their college kids. Or their kids will stop communicating with them and it could matter sometime. Hard experience talkin’ here.
If it’s that urgent, text them. They’ll very likely at least read it.
Yep. Also; “Your kid has moved away, life is teaching the lessons now. Not you.” And Hank has been pretty good with that one. Carol, not so much.
Maybe the Browns should learn to inform the police about suspicious characters running around and enabling someone on bail awaiting trail for felony kidnap and assault with a deadly weapon? Rather than telling their 18-year-old daughter who probably couldn’t do anything more than that anyway?
He may just be trying to inform her that Ross is out, rather than realizing how suspicious Blaine is. In which case, informing the police doesn’t really do anything. They know Ross is out on bail.
i just wanna say joyce’s facial expressions are on point here
Oh this is gonna be good
I like the look on Sarah’s face. Priceless.
Finally someone will answer that phone.
I’m assuming she’s not been wanting to anwer because she doesn’t want to talk with the architects of her Christian upbringing while she’s questioning all her beliefs. And when she finds out what the cost of not picking up the phone has been, then will this be a fitting strip for VD.
It breaks my heart that Joyce’s dad doesn’t like her nonsexual romantic life partner.
I had a dream that Mike was in today’s comic strip and he wasn’t even injured or anything. He just turned up perfectly fine.
(reads alt-text) OH GOD *NOW* IT IS
Hail Hydra?
Best Sarah face ever.
Panel five? Yep. Willis saves that for special occasions.
(Panel four is pretty neat too.)
Like Mike did eh.
thatsthejoke.jpg
Wasn’t his dad the one that …is nice and supported her friend and all?
“Her dad”, I assume?
He’s the one who’s made a damn good attempt to step up, but he’s also still strongly religious and helped shape most of her life so far. His appearance on Family Weekend wasn’t nearly so positive as the later one. He’s improving, but I can easily see her worrying about her crisis of faith and him.
Given it’s made Joyce miserable, shouldn’t he worry about her crisis of faith?
He should, but should she trust him to?
I can understand not answering the phone, but does it not have voicemail? Hank can leave a message which Joyce can listen to without pressure.
Or Hank could send a text.
How do modern smart phones and parental controls work? Could Joyce’s mother have remote access to Joyce’s voicemail and/or texts? I assume she could demand to look at Hank’s phone to read his texts.
If so, she could also look at his call history and see that he’s been calling her desperately. He wouldn’t have to give details in any message, just enough to convey that it’s urgent.
Well at least someone is answering D:
“City Morgue” is another classic.
Dorothy, I know you feel powerless over your friend going through a lot of shit you can’t help her with, but she really don’t need your help thinking up scenarios for what might be wrong.