Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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TELL HIM I BANGED HIS MOM
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June 1, 2026

Directions

by David M Willis on July 10, 2020 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Is a Song Forever?
└ Tags: amber, ethan, mike

Discussion (118) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    July 10, 2020 at 12:01 am | #

    the best thing about Mike is the perfect Mike replica is just him saying the same thing

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      July 10, 2020 at 12:07 am | #

      If you’re going to simulate an entire human being as essentially a subroutine in your brain, it needs to be a fairly straightforward and predictable one.

      Amber can run 1 Mike, 3 Galassos, 7 Marys, or 37 Dannys before she experiences significant lag.

      • Savail
        Savail
        July 10, 2020 at 12:09 am | #

        Okay, but how many Dinas, though?

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          July 10, 2020 at 12:11 am | #

          0.0002

          • clif
            clif
            July 10, 2020 at 11:42 am | #

            Now, consider the case of Willis who runs them all. Though I must admit, not apparently in real time. The same processor is handling the entire graphics load though, so who knows.

            • fridge_logic
              fridge_logic
              July 10, 2020 at 11:02 pm | #

              But the graphics load of about 10 frames per day not even as pixels, as abstract line work. That’s a pretty low graphics load from a compression standpoint.

      • Regalli
        Regalli
        July 10, 2020 at 12:10 am | #

        How the hell is Danny that much more predictable than Mary? Just think of the most assholishly compulsive heteronormativity thing to say, cloak it in a facade of ‘concern’, and you’re good.

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          July 10, 2020 at 12:14 am | #

          Mary turned unexpectedly friendly in her last appearance, due to getting a boyfriend. That’s the sort of unpredictable behavior you need to allocate extra resources for.

          Most surprisingly thing Danny has done in either universe is purchase a hat.

          • Regalli
            Regalli
            July 10, 2020 at 12:24 am | #

            True, true. Even the ukulele fits into Friendly Bi Guy Paradigms.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              July 10, 2020 at 7:56 am | #

              I suspect her simulation would have needed to be updated to cover the Bi part.

          • Dr. T
            Dr. T
            July 10, 2020 at 3:39 pm | #

            So…..you are saying that penis is a cure for whatever the hell was wrong with Mary?

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              July 10, 2020 at 5:21 pm | #

              Nope! Because that relationship is founded on being smugly righteous and superior to everyone else, TOGETHER! (And planning on getting married to justify their desire to bone. Far as we know they haven’t yet.)

      • Kyrik Michalowski
        Kyrik Michalowski
        July 10, 2020 at 12:15 am | #

        I feel like you aren’t giving Danny enough credit, and giving Mary too much. The Mike and Galasso’s thing I’ll buy though.

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          July 10, 2020 at 12:19 am | #

          I’m just being snide, Danny’s a good egg.

          The hat needs to die, though. Hopefully with Amber’s video game habits, her simulation of him would have cosmetic options.

          • Kyrik Michalowski
            Kyrik Michalowski
            July 10, 2020 at 12:29 am | #

            She would absolutely dress him up in something spandex or something.

          • Geneseepaws
            Geneseepaws
            July 10, 2020 at 12:39 am | #

            Kill the hat. WITH FIRE!

  2. PASchaefer
    PASchaefer
    July 10, 2020 at 12:02 am | #

    TELL HIM!

    • clif
      clif
      July 10, 2020 at 11:44 am | #

      DO ETT!!!

  3. Someone
    Someone
    July 10, 2020 at 12:02 am | #

    Her inner Mike isn’t looking too good…

    • Foxhack
      Foxhack
      July 10, 2020 at 12:03 am | #

      He looks a bit flat.

      • The Coolest Child
        The Coolest Child
        July 10, 2020 at 12:06 am | #

        Don’t all mikes?

        • Michael Steamweed
          Michael Steamweed
          July 10, 2020 at 12:14 am | #

          Fall three stories you do, see how flat you look.

  4. JetstreamGW
    JetstreamGW
    July 10, 2020 at 12:03 am | #

    God dammit, Ethan, your friend is telling you about an active hallucination right now.

    Also yes, Amber, tell him.

    • ELLIOT
      ELLIOT
      July 10, 2020 at 2:11 am | #

      I’m wondering if he isn’t more of an introject than a hallucination. Guess we’ll find out.

      • NelC
        NelC
        July 11, 2020 at 10:33 am | #

        I learned a new word today!

  5. Chris
    Chris
    July 10, 2020 at 12:03 am | #

    She now has two people telling her that. Maybe she should listen.

    • Miri
      Miri
      July 10, 2020 at 7:53 am | #

      Who else told her that Mike banged Ethan’s mother?

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        July 10, 2020 at 10:53 am | #

        Willis, apparently.

  6. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    July 10, 2020 at 12:04 am | #

    Amber: How was I supposed to know that the correct response to your concern for my identity crisis wasn’t to dissociate a completely new identity based on our mutual childhood friend?! I mean, I’m not a mind reader for goodness sake!

  7. AutobotDen
    AutobotDen
    July 10, 2020 at 12:04 am | #

    I mean, they’re not wrong…

  8. Kravis
    Kravis
    July 10, 2020 at 12:04 am | #

    And you both know how much it was for.

  9. The Coolest Child
    The Coolest Child
    July 10, 2020 at 12:04 am | #

    We’re getting the Shortpacked!Gang back together!

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      July 10, 2020 at 12:08 am | #

      Without Ninja Rick or Ronnie?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        July 10, 2020 at 12:10 am | #

        Ronnie was brought into being because 80s nostalgia was cool at the time.

        Now 90s nostalgia is cool, so Galasso would have to resurrect Bill Clinton…who is still alive, so that may present a hurdle.

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          July 10, 2020 at 12:14 am | #

          Certainly with THAT attitude, it will!

          (Do not assassinate a former US President, kids. It is a very, very bad thing to do. Also wash your hands, wear a mask when you go outside, and stay in your school video conference. *80s cartoon smile*)

          But also I mean, technically H.W. Bush was a president in the 90s and also deceased.

          • C.T Phipps
            C.T Phipps
            July 10, 2020 at 12:23 am | #

            Ninja Rick will never return but maybe Ninja Dave will show up or someone otherwise obsessed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles the way that Ethan is with Transformers.

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              July 10, 2020 at 12:28 am | #

              Sentai Paul, who is EXTREMELY into Super Sentai and other tokusatsu shows (but not Power Rangers, which is an Americanized abomination for kids, he will not recognize the irony of this statement, don’t waste your time.)

              • EvilMidnightLurker
                EvilMidnightLurker
                July 10, 2020 at 2:41 am | #

                Kamen Rider Doug.

                • Regalli
                  Regalli
                  July 10, 2020 at 11:03 am | #

                  They have an intense and extremely pointless rivalry.

            • Needfuldoer
              Needfuldoer
              July 10, 2020 at 5:57 am | #

              I like to think Ninja Rick is a groundskeeper at IU, and he’s been in frame before, but we never see him because he’s a ninja.

          • a/snow/mous/e
            a/snow/mous/e
            July 10, 2020 at 12:29 am | #

            move aside, Ronnie, it’s George Herbie’s time to shine!

  10. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    July 10, 2020 at 12:05 am | #

    *plays “Prelude/Angry Young Man” on the hacked Muzak*

    • Dara
      Dara
      July 10, 2020 at 12:30 am | #

      I’m a little surprised you went with that one and not this one. Just too obvious, I guess?

      • Geneseepaws
        Geneseepaws
        July 10, 2020 at 12:43 am | #

        Simon and Garfunkel’s Mrs. Robinson?

        • Geneseepaws
          Geneseepaws
          July 10, 2020 at 12:44 am | #

          For a nickel?

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        July 10, 2020 at 5:48 pm | #

        I guess I needed a break from synth music.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 10, 2020 at 5:55 am | #

      Never a bad time for Styx.

  11. Dave
    Dave
    July 10, 2020 at 12:06 am | #

    Man, if Mike comes out of his coma, I hope he gets a hairstyle that obeys Euclidean geometry.

    He’s the only one of the Amber-Ethan-Mike trio who hasn’t gotten a new ‘do, it’s warranted!

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      July 10, 2020 at 11:33 am | #

      Well his head did get shaved (or trimmed down) when he was hospitalized so that’s likely to happen.

  12. NinjaMaid
    NinjaMaid
    July 10, 2020 at 12:08 am | #

    Okay but if Mike comes out of his coma, will imaginary!Mike go away. Or will he fight himself by proxy?

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      July 10, 2020 at 12:11 am | #

      I kind of want Brain Ghost Mike and Real Mike to get into an insult contest by proxy while Amber officiates.

      It’d be awful, but.

      • Michael Steamweed
        Michael Steamweed
        July 10, 2020 at 12:17 am | #

        Amazi-Girl, Amber, Ghost Mike, and Real Mike all end up sleeping together. Two people in a very crowded bed.

    • Cryognosis
      Cryognosis
      August 5, 2020 at 5:44 am | #

      Introjects are as permanent as other kinds of alters. Think of it this way, a huge force of events was big enough to shunt a new identity out. Good news isn’t going to shove the identity ‘back in’, let alone the idea that the counter “impact” would be as much force.

  13. BBCC
    BBCC
    July 10, 2020 at 12:10 am | #

    Bad timing, Ghost Mike.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      July 10, 2020 at 5:35 pm | #

      From our point-of-view, it’s bad. Alas, not to him.

  14. Cyrus
    Cyrus
    July 10, 2020 at 12:11 am | #

    Darn hovertext isn’t working again.

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      July 10, 2020 at 12:18 am | #

      “TELL HIM I BANGED HIS MOM”

      Exactly what Ghost Mike said.

      • clif
        clif
        July 10, 2020 at 11:47 am | #

        Thanks. I’m hoping this isn’t the new normal.

      • PB
        PB
        July 10, 2020 at 10:47 pm | #

        I think it was meant to be Mike repeating the same thing but louder this time because Amber wasn’t telling Ethan.

  15. Nono
    Nono
    July 10, 2020 at 12:12 am | #

    Gross, Mike.

    You have better standards than Naomi.

    • Miri
      Miri
      July 10, 2020 at 12:52 am | #

      But nickels.

      OK, it is Naomi. He charged her two nickels.

  16. woobie
    woobie
    July 10, 2020 at 12:12 am | #

    He knows, Mike.
    He knows.

    • PB
      PB
      July 10, 2020 at 10:48 pm | #

      This made me laugh unreasonably hard. Thank you. <3

      • woobie
        woobie
        July 11, 2020 at 12:44 am | #

        🙂

  17. Kyrik Michalowski
    Kyrik Michalowski
    July 10, 2020 at 12:13 am | #

    I wonder if hallucinations are going to be the new norm for Amber, which is fine if that’s the case, I’m just curious. I deal with hallucinations myself so it’s always interesting to see it portrayed.

    Also, can Hallucination Mike bang real mothers? Has science gone that far?

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      July 10, 2020 at 12:22 am | #

      We know she hallucinated Blaine right after stabbing Ryan, but that was only the once. (It was, however, more detailed, with shading. Maybe because Hallucination Mike started in part trying to get Amber to realize he was Not Okay after AG changed controls again? Or maybe artstyle changes, or purely for reader benefit. Who knows.) All we know for sure is it’s not just Mike.

      Probably only the ones who accept equally hallucinatory nickels. It’s more of them than you’d think!

      • Kyrik Michalowski
        Kyrik Michalowski
        July 10, 2020 at 12:31 am | #

        Well we’ll have to see if she continues to hallucinate Mike after he gets out of the hospital. Which I am declaring as a when, not if, because I don’t think Willis is ready to kill him off.

        • ELLIOT
          ELLIOT
          July 10, 2020 at 2:14 am | #

          I’m wondering if he’s a hallucination or an introject in her system.

          • clif
            clif
            July 10, 2020 at 11:54 am | #

            I believe you may be the second person here to use the word introject. The meaning is reasonably clear from context and structure. Is it a technical term from either psychiatry, occult studies, or video game programming?

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              July 10, 2020 at 3:33 pm | #

              It seems to be a psychiatric term used with multiple systems for an alter based on a different person.

            • elsendor
              elsendor
              July 11, 2020 at 1:15 am | #

              an introject is an alter that draws their personality from an external source, as opposed to being more or less invented in-house. a fictional introject would be, say, if i developed an alter based on/who believed themself to be peter parker, but there can also be introjects based on real people in ones life, celebrities, or really any person the brain latches onto and internalizes the patterns of at the time of the alter’s formation. it’s pretty common for ppl with DID to form alters based on their abusers, for example.

          • Kamino Neko
            Kamino Neko
            July 10, 2020 at 11:58 pm | #

            Amazi-Girl isn’t shown like Mike is – the one time she makes a visible appearance when she’s not driving the body, she’s monochromatic blue, not full, if flat, colours. Which points to Mike being a hallucination caused by something like a week without sleep when he first showed up.

          • Cryognosis
            Cryognosis
            August 5, 2020 at 5:48 am | #

            Amber did mention Mike earlier, I think introject, personally.

  18. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    July 10, 2020 at 12:24 am | #

    I’d question if this is really the time for Ethan to be saying this, but given if she was less exhausted, she might just brush him off, maybe there is no good time for it, just whenever it gets done.

  19. Jo Giggles
    Jo Giggles
    July 10, 2020 at 12:32 am | #

    Is anyone else’s comic not aligned anymore so you can both longer do the hover text on mobile under the 2nd last panel? There is no way to click it because the next and last comic buttons are now in the way. This started happening last night and I hoped it would resolve with today’s comic :'(

    • Chris
      Chris
      July 10, 2020 at 1:01 am | #

      I’m still getting a click sound when I press the blank space there, but the hovertext doesn’t come up.

      • Ron again
        Ron again
        July 10, 2020 at 1:56 am | #

        No hovertext for me either, here or on previous comics where it did work the day before yesterday. I don’t get a click either…
        i hope this is fixed soon..

        • clif
          clif
          July 10, 2020 at 11:58 am | #

          I wonder what changed. Older strips still work. Though I guess the particular older strips I looked at could still be held locally.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            July 10, 2020 at 3:34 pm | #

            Something else weird is that yesterday’s strip doesn’t have an active next button. There’s something going on.

  20. Creatrix Tiara
    Creatrix Tiara
    July 10, 2020 at 12:48 am | #

    I’m not sure I understand Ethan’s comment. Maybe I’m misunderstanding the use of the word “remorse” here, but if someone else is telling Amber how guilty they felt about something, why is AMBER apologising?

    • Chris
      Chris
      July 10, 2020 at 1:03 am | #

      That’s his point. Even when someone else is the one who should be sorry, she’s the sorriest person around.

    • ELLIOT
      ELLIOT
      July 10, 2020 at 2:15 am | #

      Emotional abuse can fuck a person up hard. I still catch myself doing that, and I’ve had significantly more space to heal than Amber has.

  21. abysswatcher1993
    abysswatcher1993
    July 10, 2020 at 12:59 am | #

    Sometimes I don’t know if Ethan is pointing obvious problem, or if he is just saying cruel things just because of resentment.

    • clif
      clif
      July 10, 2020 at 12:03 pm | #

      Ethan is telling her not to beat up on herself. She knows what he means, even if she refuses to accept it. But Ethan is being neither cruel or obvious, though he is speaking from the privileged position of an old friend who is permitted to be blunt.

  22. Jamie
    Jamie
    July 10, 2020 at 1:24 am | #

    No one’s suggesting this as a book title? I’m shocked.

    • clif
      clif
      July 10, 2020 at 1:10 pm | #

      DOA10: This.

      Oh. You meant DOA10: Stuff Like That!

      I sincerely hope that you aren’t intending.the last sentence in panel 5 that I’m too lazy to type.

  23. FacelessDeviant
    FacelessDeviant
    July 10, 2020 at 2:14 am | #

    Y’know, audiovisual hallucinations can be quite serious. Especially since Amber has had a lot of emotional and mental stress ON TOP of a fairly recent head trauma.

    Just saying.

    • ELLIOT
      ELLIOT
      July 10, 2020 at 2:16 am | #

      Brain Mike could also be an introject in her system.

    • Fay
      Fay
      July 10, 2020 at 6:35 am | #

      She is also *severely* sleep deprived, and has been for multiple days now. In fact, I don’t think brain!Mike has shown up when she wasn’t sleep deprived, yet.

      • Miri
        Miri
        July 10, 2020 at 7:58 am | #

        As an insomniac (and now mother of 3) I honestly didn’t realise hallucinating wasn’t normal until it came up in conversation with my husband…

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        July 10, 2020 at 8:07 am | #

        When was she last not sleep deprived?

  24. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 10, 2020 at 2:22 am | #

    Thanks for contributing, brain-Mike

  25. Arianod
    Arianod
    July 10, 2020 at 2:45 am | #

    I just now realized that Amber is a Hope player. Holy crap O_O

  26. Keulen
    Keulen
    July 10, 2020 at 2:55 am | #

    I’m gonna have to agree with hallucination-Mike here, that’s probably what Mike would want to say if he were conscious right now.

  27. Michael Haneline
    Michael Haneline
    July 10, 2020 at 3:59 am | #

    I’d been just kind of thinking of “brain Mike” as a joke up until now, but taking it more seriously… does Amber have dissociative identity disorder AND schizoaffective disorder?

    • Sam
      Sam
      July 10, 2020 at 12:44 pm | #

      Not necessarily with the later. Mike could be an introject, he could be a hallucination from sleep-deprivation, it could be she has developed psychotic episodes because of the recent trauma. Or it could be linked to her PTSD as psychosis commonly co-occurs with it and to my knowledge, if you have DID you are very likely to have c-PTSD.

  28. fudo81
    fudo81
    July 10, 2020 at 4:30 am | #

    I haven’t been able to read the alt-text on my mobile in the last few days. Has anything changed? This is especially frustrating since that Comic Chameleon piece of crap has been stuck for more than a week on all comics I read.

    • JaneDoe
      JaneDoe
      July 10, 2020 at 2:39 pm | #

      Yeah, the no alt text on mobile is apparently a problem for many of us right now, as I learned in yesterday’s comment section when I was having that problem. Good to know that the comic chameleon problem is also happening to other people though, and it’s not just me! For quite a while, it’s been a few days behind, and now it has exactly one comic available from after July 1st. And that is not from a series is read.

  29. Eskimolos
    Eskimolos
    July 10, 2020 at 5:35 am | #

    I’ve been trying, but there’s literally no way for me so far to view the last exchanges between Ethan and Amber as anything but him taking his frustrations over the situation out on her, when she has been doing literally nothing but trying to make the situation better in as much as she is capable. Instead of owning his own shit – like ignoring and writing off Mike the night of the attack, not even wondering where he was until he found out he was in the hospital – he seems to be putting all his negative feelings onto Amber as though all of it was her fault and she could have somehow done more or avoided this entire thing, and like it is her fault that he gets into these messes, largely because she had the misfortune of having Blaine as her father.

    Specifically, nothing he has said has bee supportive, kind, or empathetic to the shit she has been through over the past few days, and now it feels like gaslighting suggesting he can’t even get frustrated at her without her, what? Wanting to do something about it? Of course she does. Like it’s her fault she takes it personally that he is venting at her about… Her, and the situations he ends up in because he’s known her this long.

    I just struggle to like Ethan at all right now.

    • Miri
      Miri
      July 10, 2020 at 8:09 am | #

      I think he was trying to say “these situations suck” and was kinda looking for “yep” rather than an apology which then moves the conversation to mediating her unwarranted guilt because it leads to things like stabbing Sal’s hand (with Blaine’s provocation, but her trying to protect Ethan even though he and Sal were cool with each other indicates she still viewed her as an active threat to him, so she may still have been scared of her while she was restrained when they were younger (especially with the crippling social anxiety). She then Batmaned into a caped vigilante, putting herself at risk, and if you go with “Blaine targeted Amber and her friends to get to Amazigirl even though he didn’t know they share a body/some memories/started out as the same person, meaning that put them at risk” then she’s responsible but that thinking is convoluted).

      Her guilt can’t be ignored because it leads her to unpredictable and potentially dangerous/criminal acts. But it does derail his ability to discuss how *he* feels.

      Either that or he’s exhausted, worried and angry and doesn’t have the mental capacity to also be gentle right now?

      • Roger Sterling
        Roger Sterling
        July 11, 2020 at 12:43 am | #

        It’s not THAT convoluted.

        1. Amber bodyjacked Amazigirl and gave Blaine his just desserts, which is to say beating him until he started exhaling blood.
        2. Since Amber is just Amazigirl’s alter, Blaine concluded he got his ass handed to him by a masked vigilante ninja.
        3. Blaine realized a ninja existed on campus he could leverage for his plans by using hostages.
        4. Every part of Blaine’s plan showed clear signs of being affected by his beating and a latent desire to get his newfound rival back.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      July 10, 2020 at 8:20 am | #

      Why would Ethan have wondered where Mike was the night of the attack? Mike was at the party. Left the party, apparently to go home and Ethan didn’t happen to see him the next day. This happens. No reason to think it’s a big deal.

      Nor any reason to worry about the people who aren’t kidnapped when you’ve been kidnapped yourself. Ethan’s got his issues, but they’re really not tied up in this.

    • KJ
      KJ
      July 10, 2020 at 3:01 pm | #

      Ethan reads to me like someone who is…burnt out on how his close friend acts and is reacting with an unreasonable response. It’s not good, but it…happens. It’s something I’m quite familiar with in my group of people that have a lot of the same issues as the cast of DoA.

    • autogatos
      autogatos
      July 11, 2020 at 6:04 am | #

      Yeah I *get* Ethan’s frustration, it’s hard to know what to do/say when a friend is constantly apologizing and being self-deprecating, it’s really awkward and uncomfortable and kind of makes you have to constantly spend time making them feel better about themselves…

      BUT I have also BEEN that friend who is like Amber (with the self-deprecating guilt and severe anxiety & social awkwardness, not the dissociative identity disorder), and I know that often this behavior is the result of serious insecurity and real guilt, and the last thing you want to do is make your friend feel worse, but you also already feel like you’re making your friend feel worse by existing/being a screw-up and…it just sucks for everyone involved, on all sides.

      tl;dr I get Ethan’s frustration but I also get Amber. She probably needs to hear the things he’s saying but he needs to understand she’s trying her best.

      Really she just needs to talk to a darn professional already because neither of them is equipped to deal with her struggling mental health on their own atm. Her brain is undoubtedly not a fun place to be in right now.

  30. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    July 10, 2020 at 7:35 am | #

    I can’t decide if right now Amber need the help of a psychologist or an exorcist. Probably both.

    • a/snow/mous/e
      a/snow/mous/e
      July 10, 2020 at 12:04 pm | #

      Well, to be frank, she already needed to see a psychologist.
      …As did much of the main cast, even before the kidnapping. 😛

    • Eldritchy
      Eldritchy
      July 10, 2020 at 12:59 pm | #

      Psychologist, Mike is still alive… unless he is having an out-of-body experience…

  31. Kaidah
    Kaidah
    July 10, 2020 at 8:38 am | #

    For a nickel!

  32. Zee
    Zee
    July 10, 2020 at 11:16 am | #

    Ethan successfully managed to put my feelings into words, thank you

  33. OniLink
    OniLink
    July 10, 2020 at 11:55 am | #

    Really wish Ethan had a better understanding of DID. Heck, wishing *Amber* had a better understanding. Hallucination Mike strikes me as a guilt-induced introject, but Ethan seems to think Amber is just being dramatic and neither of them are in a state to discuss what’s really happening with introject!Mike.

    I can definitely understand Ethan’s frustrations with Amber, I tend to do the thing he thinks she does where I try to overcompensate to “prove” that I’m sorry (though not via a vigilante headmate), but there’s a frustrating and understandable communication breakdown here.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      July 10, 2020 at 3:45 pm | #

      Given that Ethan just learned that she’s DID yesterday, right after a traumatic kidnapping with his ?friend? in a coma, I think he’s doing all right.

      I’m not sure Ethan just thinks she’s just being dramatic – though he certainly doesn’t get what she means by “the angry Mike in my head”. He doesn’t really get the DID, but I think he does have an idea of the self-loathing and that’s more what’s driving her to over apologize and try to go beyond what anyone would ask to make up for things.

  34. Luna
    Luna
    July 10, 2020 at 11:58 am | #

    Oh I love that this is finally being said flat-out, especially by Ethan. Amber’s always genuinely sorry when things go wrong, but she’s so focused on her own guilt rather than actually listening to the people around her that she winds up behaving in a very self-centered way. It’s a problem I get, but she’s really gotta learn to break the pattern at some point.

    • poofdepoof
      poofdepoof
      July 10, 2020 at 3:57 pm | #

      +1

  35. Andrusi
    Andrusi
    July 10, 2020 at 1:30 pm | #

    It’s a damn good thing he doesn’t know how much I hate his guts.

  36. Alan in DC
    Alan in DC
    July 10, 2020 at 4:04 pm | #

    Has she been to sleep yet?

  37. Nenja
    Nenja
    July 10, 2020 at 6:25 pm | #

    Maybe not quite the same, but I kinda feel both Ethan and Amber here. When a friend is doing bad mentally and you try and you try to help them, try to change their thought-patterns, distract them, encourage, cheer them up, but they keep going right down the hole again and again and you feel tired and frustrated because it’s the same spiral.

    I’ve been in the position both of the friend who tries to help, and the friend with the problems. I feel frustrated when I’m hurting because others are pulling me up again and again and yet my brain goes down and I struggle to break the pattern and feel guilty about that … AND I feel frustrated because I’m trying to pull my friend up again and again and they keep going down the same pattern, and feel guilty that I’m frustrated at them, because I should be understanding since I have the same issues.

    Even apologized to my therapist for going on about the same thing again and again. Tho she said ‘this is my job, and this is exactly the problem you’re here for – doesn’t matter how many times you lay it on me, it’s OK’.

    Might have gone of topic here. Point is: I feel you both.

  38. Rani
    Rani
    July 11, 2020 at 12:13 am | #

    I’m sure what I’m saying isn’t 100% accurate but I would not be surprised if the people who think Ethan is being an asshole without qualification are pretty young. The alternative is that there are grown ass people who genuinely believe one should without exception and without reservation constantly and uncritically support friends no matter what.

  39. Ron again
    Ron again
    July 11, 2020 at 2:46 am | #

    Just noticed the title of this chapter. Is that a reference to “A Softer World”?

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