Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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July 11, 2026

God’s grace

by David M Willis on March 26, 2024 at 12:01 am
  • 03 – Trystin' in the Wind
└ Tags: joyce, tristan

Discussion (346) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    March 26, 2024 at 12:02 am | #

    couldn’t believe what was on her phone and had to rush to the desktop to verify, huh

    (if that’s a laptop, it’s HUGE)

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      March 26, 2024 at 12:03 am | #

      (the other reason I decided never to look anyone up, too much likelihood of exactly NO OTHER CONCERNS)

      • Kimi
        Kimi
        March 26, 2024 at 12:11 am | #

        Always a joy when you see a former classmate’s name in the news for being arrested. That is like a forced lookup that you didn’t want to know but also probably expected.

        • Johan
          Johan
          March 26, 2024 at 1:22 am | #

          Honestly, there were some arrests that I was shocked by.

          • Ana Chronistic
            Ana Chronistic
            March 26, 2024 at 11:54 pm | #

            Former classmates, nothing

            We heard of our TEACHERS getting arrested, before we even had time to be alumni

        • Jonathan
          Jonathan
          March 26, 2024 at 1:40 am | #

          A college roommate of mine was arrested for some 19 counts including arson and indecent exposure. Granted this was not years later. It was while we were roommates. I was in the common area a few floors up playing mahjong, and had no idea that was why there were so many cop cars outside.

          • Freemage
            Freemage
            March 26, 2024 at 2:15 am | #

            Arson AND indecent exposure? That sounds like a rather… risky combination.

            • David DeLaney
              David DeLaney
              March 26, 2024 at 2:21 am | #

              it’s just ‘liar liar pants on fire’
              taken to the logical conclusion

              • Tan
                Tan
                March 26, 2024 at 9:10 am | #

                Only if there’s also fraud involved.

        • RassilonTDavros
          RassilonTDavros
          March 26, 2024 at 2:34 am | #

          Look, I’ll take that over seeing a former classmate’s name on the news because they’ve been beaten to death. Which I really wish were a hypothetical.

          • elebenty
            elebenty
            March 26, 2024 at 3:34 pm | #

            I am so sorry, that’s horrible.

          • Kimi
            Kimi
            March 26, 2024 at 4:58 pm | #

            That is definitely worse.

          • Ana Chronistic
            Ana Chronistic
            March 26, 2024 at 11:55 pm | #

            That’s horrifying =(

          • Time Sage
            Time Sage
            March 27, 2024 at 4:06 am | #

            Closest I’ve had is hearing about former classmates commenting suicide.
            Thankfully we were at best acquaintances that took the same class and hadn’t been in touch since.
            Though years later thinking back and and realizing he was one of the first guys I found physically attractive made it stick with me

        • Skorpeyon
          Skorpeyon
          March 26, 2024 at 8:56 am | #

          I’ll never forget the day I was visiting my gf at the time’s grandparents and saw an old classmate on TV in an orange jumpsuit on trial for infanticide. It was shocking for sure. Kinda hard to focus on the visit after that.

        • Kazuma Taichi
          Kazuma Taichi
          March 26, 2024 at 5:46 pm | #

          It’s only a forced lookup if you keep on top of the news

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 12:17 am | #

        scroll down more for repentant Sonic crying at the foot of the cross.

        • Ana Chronistic
          Ana Chronistic
          March 26, 2024 at 11:56 pm | #

          also it’s an AI image of it

      • Jeremiah
        Jeremiah
        March 26, 2024 at 3:33 am | #

        I never look anyone up because I don’t know anyone enough to look the up.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        March 26, 2024 at 4:14 am | #

        I’ve discovered some politically concerning things posted by former school friends.

        In hindsight, I shouldn’t have been surprised.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        March 26, 2024 at 6:10 am | #

        This is why I regret accepting friend requests from several relatives on Facebook… I have multiple relatives who are hardcore Trump supporters. (I don’t even really use Facebook…I just needed it for a game I used to play.)

        … We’re Canadian.

        • Yumi
          Yumi
          March 26, 2024 at 7:40 am | #

          I only accepted my aunt’s Facebook friend request because she was about to make a Thing about it at my grandma’s birthday party. And she’s one of my family members who’s generally okay– a blanket “not accepting older relatives” position felt best overall. Alas.

        • Dave
          Dave
          March 26, 2024 at 9:42 am | #

          Wow – I can relate! Fellow Canadian and always stunned when I speak to people I know and find out they support the Orange Idiot. It’s fairly rare, but creates a sick feeling and a caution when I’m around them. I mean, HOW?!

          • Opus the Poet
            Opus the Poet
            March 26, 2024 at 10:45 pm | #

            Yeah I went to HS in a suburb of Salt Lake City, and pretty much all of my classmates are MAGAts, except for the one that got pregnant senior year. She was actually pretty cool.

      • Max
        Max
        March 26, 2024 at 10:48 am | #

        I stopped hanging out with my former childhood best friend when we were teenagers. He was going down a bad path. Several years later I saw his name in the paper for armed robbery. Not cool.

      • zee
        zee
        March 26, 2024 at 11:27 am | #

        I mean my highschool classmates were such assholes we cycled through three science teachers and the whole school apparently hated us. They caused a scandal (granted I blame the administration more for greenlighting their dumbass idea) so huge it made the news. I’m really curious what those assholes are up to now… Sadly I’m 23 so I don’t have Facebook and I doubt many of them do either

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      March 26, 2024 at 12:24 am | #

      She has both a laptop and a desktop. oops, linked two strips that are both kind of about boning Joe.

      • DinaJoyce
        DinaJoyce
        March 26, 2024 at 1:13 am | #

        These both look like laptops to me?

        • june gloom
          june gloom
          March 26, 2024 at 1:54 am | #

          Look closely in the strip with her mom, you can see the PC tower to the left of the monitor.

      • Woop de doop
        Woop de doop
        March 26, 2024 at 3:56 am | #

        Wow I wonder why she has both instead of just one or the other.

        • TheKelliestKelly
          TheKelliestKelly
          March 26, 2024 at 4:50 am | #

          To give more options for panel composition

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            March 26, 2024 at 3:52 pm | #

            shhh

        • june gloom
          june gloom
          March 26, 2024 at 5:02 am | #

          Desktops are easier to work with IMO but laptops are portable. Both have their uses.

        • Mr D phone posting
          Mr D phone posting
          March 26, 2024 at 5:22 am | #

          One is for work, the other one is to watch cartoons (and Joe boning Roz) in bed.

        • zee
          zee
          March 26, 2024 at 11:31 am | #

          Simple: Joyce is a student AND a gamer

        • Mark
          Mark
          March 26, 2024 at 5:15 pm | #

          Because they don’t make laptops with 25″ screens.

    • anon
      anon
      March 27, 2024 at 2:02 am | #

      this is either legit or just to keep up appearances so any religious acquaintances/relatives would get off his back lol

  2. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    March 26, 2024 at 12:03 am | #

    Dumbing of Age Book 14: What’s in the Bible is Very Important!

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      March 26, 2024 at 12:04 am | #

      Dumbing of Age: Very Few People Are Saying This!!

      • Aura
        Aura
        March 26, 2024 at 12:42 am | #

        Dumbing of Age Book 14: Feeling His Love Today 😉

        • Samniel
          Samniel
          March 26, 2024 at 12:50 am | #

          Dumbing of Age Book 14: Vaccines are a globalist [REDACTED]

  3. Thag Simmons
    Thag Simmons
    March 26, 2024 at 12:03 am | #

    Yeah, that’s not very surprising.

    • anon
      anon
      March 27, 2024 at 2:02 am | #

      i wonder if he knew abou beck’s dad or if he’s long since moved away lol

  4. IntangibleMatter
    IntangibleMatter
    March 26, 2024 at 12:03 am | #

    And here we watch Joyce realize the true horror of someone you used to know turning out to be a far-right nut.

    Fs in the chat, so sorry for her loss

    • IntangibleMatter
      IntangibleMatter
      March 26, 2024 at 12:04 am | #

      Well, I guess not so much turning out to be as having maintained that status.

      Still… disappointing¸though.

      • drs
        drs
        March 26, 2024 at 1:01 am | #

        He was “who cares what’s in the bible” when younger. https://www.dumbingofage.com/comics/2024-03-04-tara.png

    • Dara
      Dara
      March 26, 2024 at 12:07 am | #

      Ex-gf of mine turned into a MAGAt and I found out when I saw her going off about how it should be legal for her to kill protestors with her car. We had a very brief discussion and then I blocked her. I presume it was mutual.

      • Kimi
        Kimi
        March 26, 2024 at 12:12 am | #

        I would offer my condolences but I am also glad that you escaped that.

        • Dara
          Dara
          March 26, 2024 at 12:30 am | #

          We were never serious but it was fun for a while. (And we also shared a boyfriend for a while. Like I said, it was fun. ^_^ )

          but yeah at the same time kiiiiiiiiiiiiinda dodged a bullet

    • Mollyscribbles
      Mollyscribbles
      March 26, 2024 at 12:19 am | #

      childhood acquaintance reached out on facebook. I check his profile. First post: BLUE LIVES MATTER. Blocked.

    • Kelli
      Kelli
      March 26, 2024 at 12:41 am | #

      Yep. My niece went full qool-aid. A shame.

    • foamy
      foamy
      March 26, 2024 at 3:13 am | #

      There, but for the grace of God…

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 3:53 pm | #

        ; )

    • Woop de doop
      Woop de doop
      March 26, 2024 at 3:18 am | #

      Now you’re just somebody that I used to knowwwww

      • IntangibleMatter
        IntangibleMatter
        March 26, 2024 at 3:50 am | #

        Reminded me of this gem

        • Woop de doop
          Woop de doop
          March 26, 2024 at 4:05 am | #

          Well I hated that lol

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      March 26, 2024 at 3:32 am | #

      Reconnected with a childhood best friend a few years ago after interacting with her brother. She was the sweetest kid when we were little, but I didn’t take into account the effect “both her parents are cops” would have on how our views diverged…

      Also, she very much styles herself a “country girl,” which is harmless, really, and she has moved to a more rural area, but I’m still like… we very much did grow up in the same suburban city. At the time, she definitely hadn’t been out of it for more than five years.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      March 26, 2024 at 7:02 am | #

      It’s even worse for Joyce since it’s a reminder of how close she was to going down that path.

    • zee
      zee
      March 26, 2024 at 11:36 am | #

      My highschool crush was homophobic (most people in school were tbh..) and very begged me to just “become a Christian”. Yea idk why I liked him either I was 14 and the pheromones were strong ig. I’m mad curious what he actually grew up to be like bc it’s equal chances he’s a right-wing shithead or going to college in likely a different country opened up his tiny lil brain to new things and he became normal

  5. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    March 26, 2024 at 12:04 am | #

    Oh no. They got him. And countless other friends from Joyce’s childhood. T_T

    *plays “Meinya” from Made in Abyss OST on hacked muzak*

  6. paleotectonics
    paleotectonics
    March 26, 2024 at 12:05 am | #

    He tried something hinky/youth-pastory with her. My guess.

    • furubatsu
      furubatsu
      March 26, 2024 at 2:30 am | #

      My moneys on this

    • lyzyrdwyzyrd
      lyzyrdwyzyrd
      March 26, 2024 at 7:33 am | #

      He is a peer not a youth pastor

      • paleotectonics
        paleotectonics
        March 26, 2024 at 7:38 am | #

        “Youth-pastory” = molesty

  7. C.T. Phipps
    C.T. Phipps
    March 26, 2024 at 12:05 am | #

    Did Tristan learn to believe in God?

    Or did Tristan discover white CIS het dudes get rewarded if they claim to be religious?

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      March 26, 2024 at 12:14 am | #

      I don’t think we saw him not. Low effort at devotion doesn’t mean not believing in the Christian god, or the god(s) of whichever religion someone’s brought up in/near.

    • Radiance
      Radiance
      March 26, 2024 at 12:15 am | #

      FYI, “cis” isn’t an acronym or anything. There’s no reason to capitalize it unless you’re just yelling about cisgender people in general I guess.

      • C.T. Phipps
        C.T. Phipps
        March 26, 2024 at 12:26 am | #

        Thanks for the correction!

      • Vanessa
        Vanessa
        March 26, 2024 at 12:32 am | #

        Christian In Status maybe, like a televangelist caught grifting or Trump with his multiple divorces and hookers who is somehow more Christian than a man who is still married to his first wife and loves all of his offspring unconditionally.

        • Bridgebrain
          Bridgebrain
          March 26, 2024 at 4:07 pm | #

          And actually goes to church ever

      • Aura
        Aura
        March 26, 2024 at 12:45 am | #

        Or you’re talking about the Confederacy of Independent Systems! That’s always what I think of first when I see all-caps cis

        • RassilonTDavros
          RassilonTDavros
          March 26, 2024 at 12:53 am | #

          TIL that the separatists in the prequels had an actual name other than “the separatists.”

          …So who’s gonna tell the anti-woke Sequel-hater crowd that their beloved Prequels literally had villains named the “Confederacy”

          • C.T. Phipps
            C.T. Phipps
            March 26, 2024 at 1:08 am | #

            I didn’t want Revenge of the Sith to become good because it suddenly became topical.

          • LeafletErin
            LeafletErin
            March 26, 2024 at 1:09 am | #

            From Merriam Webster dictionary:

            Confederacy (noun):
            : a group of people, countries, organizations, etc. joined together for a common purpose or by a common interest

            It’s not an inherently bad word. It’s only in America that we most commonly associate UT with something so short lived.

            • C.T. Phipps
              C.T. Phipps
              March 26, 2024 at 3:13 am | #

              I mean it was absolutely who George Lucas was invoking.

              • Thag Simmons
                Thag Simmons
                March 26, 2024 at 4:49 am | #

                I would hope that he wasn’t. The Prequels are a little muddled on the issue, but a major part of this is that the Separatists absolutely have a fair point and ultimately their desire to secede from the Republic gets extremely vindicated by the end.

                • C.T. Phipps
                  C.T. Phipps
                  March 26, 2024 at 5:53 am | #

                  The Prequels only show the Confederacy as a cover for an alliance of evil corporate interests. The SHOW makes them have a point.

                • BBCC
                  BBCC
                  March 27, 2024 at 12:27 am | #

                  And even the show had it so that those super nice Congress critters who may have valid reasons to dislike the Republic are not actually in charge. As soon as they vote a way Dooku and the Separatist council don’t like, they pay lip service to it and then promptly ignore and sabotage it. THEY are the ones who really run the Separatists and they are committing atrocity after atrocity (which the Congress critters apparently either don’t pay attention to at all or are so sheltered from the war it can be hidden from them. Neither of which speaks well to their authority).

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              March 26, 2024 at 4:52 am | #

              I’ll be honest I associate it as much with tribal confederations like the Iroquois as I do with the Yankee Civil War

              • lyzyrdwyzyrd
                lyzyrdwyzyrd
                March 26, 2024 at 7:20 am | #

                Not the Yankee Civil War.
                Yankees were the Northerners. We didn’t have a Civil War.
                It was Rebels v Yankees, the American Civil War.

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  March 26, 2024 at 2:38 pm | #

                  “To foreigners, a Yankee is an American.
                  To Americans, a Yankee is a Northerner.”

                • Thag Simmons
                  Thag Simmons
                  March 26, 2024 at 3:10 pm | #

                  Since your country has decided to call it’s citizens “Americans” as though it was the only country on the continent, I’m going to keep using Yankee

                • Zero
                  Zero
                  March 27, 2024 at 1:03 am | #

                  Two continents!

      • clif
        clif
        March 26, 2024 at 3:03 am | #

        I thought CIS was a Latin acronym for On the Side Of.

        I have no idea why I thought that.

        • Liara
          Liara
          March 26, 2024 at 3:09 am | #

          Cis does mean that, it’s just not an acronym

        • eh, whatever
          eh, whatever
          March 26, 2024 at 4:44 am | #

          cis = on this side
          trans = across, to the other side
          Gallia cisalpina = northern Italy = Gaul on this side of the Alps
          Gallia transalpina = France = Gaul on the other side of the Alps

          • milu
            milu
            March 26, 2024 at 9:00 am | #

            Which of course is a funny word in that it presumes which side the speaker is on. So that when people in france (well, journalists) write something like “transalpine politics” they mean Italian.

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              March 26, 2024 at 4:03 pm | #

              or Transatlantic means on that side of the Atlantic. Doesn’t France have a Banc Transatlantique ?

              • milu
                milu
                March 26, 2024 at 4:45 pm | #

                does it? what is it?
                …oh wait you meant banque. “Banc” means bench haha.
                also, i didn’t know about that bank. but in that sense it should probably mean, like, spanning or connecting both sides of the atlantic.

                • HueSatLight
                  HueSatLight
                  March 26, 2024 at 8:28 pm | #

                  I did not minor in French, so I went off translations in the dictionary 😛
                  banc (de sable, I expect) was listed as cognate for bank (shore or sandbar).

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            March 26, 2024 at 2:41 pm | #

            In modern (non-gender) usage it tends to imply crossing rather than just on the other side.
            A transatlantic flight would be one that crossed the Atlantic, not one between two points on the other side.

            But yeah, originally it was based on where the important people lived. In Rome.

    • thakoru
      thakoru
      March 26, 2024 at 1:26 am | #

      Oh he definitely seems like a grifter who uses the performance of piety to gain trust and social capital from other Christians without actually being at all pious. Good thing Joyce doesn’t have any trauma relating to exactly that kind of guy, otherwise this could get very upsetting!

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 7:05 am | #

        He’s 18. If he’s doing this performatively on FB, he’s likely doing it to keep his parents off his back, not actually grifting.

        Or he’s actually sincere, like Joyce was a few months ago.

        • Li
          Li
          March 26, 2024 at 5:43 pm | #

          Yeah, I mean, it COULD be fully sincere, or he could be pulling a Liz.

    • Mark
      Mark
      March 26, 2024 at 7:46 am | #

      Hey, when did that happen and where’s my reward?

    • anon
      anon
      March 27, 2024 at 2:14 am | #

      well, one of joyce’s brothers (the one that got married in india) did get a car outta it i believe

  8. Animedingo
    Animedingo
    March 26, 2024 at 12:06 am | #

    Thats a yikes bro

  9. Jo_cubstar
    Jo_cubstar
    March 26, 2024 at 12:07 am | #

    So he’s an anti-vaxer. Sounds about right

    • C.T. Phipps
      C.T. Phipps
      March 26, 2024 at 12:08 am | #

      Times they are changing

      I grew up among fundamentalists in West Virginia and that’s one of the few states that mandates all children be vaccinated. Because they have experience with disease and think people against them are morons.

      • Bittersweet
        Bittersweet
        March 26, 2024 at 12:17 am | #

        It’s the weirdest thing because I swear that the anti-vaxx demographics flip flopped from when I was growing up. When I was little it was the little hippy liberal moms that opposed vaccines, I moved from a blue state to a red state and got to experience the trauma of 7 new mandatory shots in one doctor visit (also the core memory of having a towel thrown over my head and being restrained because holy shit doctors are terrible with children). Like, I distinctly remember everybody Republican being ultra pro vaccines until like, the HPV one and even then it was just “oh that one specifically is bad.”

        Now it’s the exact opposite and I get looked at like I’m insane for having given my daughter all her vaccines. They’re always like “YOU ACTUALLY GOT HER VACCINATED?” And I’m just like… yeah, my mom grew up with smallpox, we get all vaccines as soon as they’re available. Shoot me up with that anti-sickness stuff we love it.

        • Bittersweet
          Bittersweet
          March 26, 2024 at 12:19 am | #

          (Gonna add here that I am also presently a little liberal hippy parent. The hippy moms also did weird demographic shifting, but that became more like splitting into factions of Crunchy and Free Range. I like shiny crystals, cutting back on ultra processed stuff and plastic clothes, and human rights)

          • Vanessa
            Vanessa
            March 26, 2024 at 12:37 am | #

            That is quite weird, isn’t it. Now the right-wingers are spending money on scam supplements and the hippies have learned to eschew homeopathic remedies because they are scammy products made so carelessly that they kill babies. Speaking personally as an organic-food-buying Democrat.

          • DinaJoyce
            DinaJoyce
            March 26, 2024 at 1:38 am | #

            YES! I grew up homeschooled and pretty conservative (not to Joyce levels though). I got all my shots. My doctor (who went to our church) even talked my parents into letting me get the HPV vaccine. Now people I grew up with are surprised that my family (which includes as severely asthmatic child) gets the new covid boosters as soon as we’re eligible. I have been back with literally the same doctor I used my entire childhood (until he retired a few months ago, alas). My entire life, when he says get this shot, I roll up my sleeve and let him give me the shot. Why would I suddenly start doubting him? When he says I qualify for the new booster, I roll up my sleeve just like I did for my kindergarten shots. It’s not that complicated!

        • Alanari
          Alanari
          March 26, 2024 at 1:19 am | #

          I’m from Europe. Can confirm. My hippie mom who skipped a few vaccines for me when I was little (not all of them, thankfully) is vaccinated against covid, while the far right are still fuming about “the dna poison”.

          • Da Boy
            Da Boy
            March 26, 2024 at 8:22 am | #

            It’s just a personal opinion but my issue with Covid vaccine is that it was so quickly pushed through while using a technology that has never been tested on a large scale. Basically taking risks with a not entirely tested tech.

            • milu
              milu
              March 26, 2024 at 9:10 am | #

              Right! The rational consequence of which ought to have been a campaign for open-source, publically funded, universal medicine! Nationalize Big Pharma now!

              But that’s hard and scary. Conspiracism is more convenient.

              • Da Boy
                Da Boy
                March 26, 2024 at 11:38 am | #

                Well my country already has universal healthcare and Big Pharma companies are not from my country so… not really anything I can do.

            • drs
              drs
              March 26, 2024 at 1:30 pm | #

              The alternatives were (a) letting everyone get hit by an “untested” vascular virus that killed lots of people and was having random crippling effects on even more or (b) masks and lockdowns for even longer.

              • Da Boy
                Da Boy
                March 26, 2024 at 1:39 pm | #

                That is true

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              March 26, 2024 at 2:53 pm | #

              And now it’s been more tested than nearly anything else in medicine. Field tested, but still.

              If you were uncomfortable in early 2021, that’s one thing. Now it’s just conspiracy theory.

              • Da Boy
                Da Boy
                March 26, 2024 at 4:51 pm | #

                The fact that Pfizer and Moderna are apparently immune to lawsuit from side-effects Is Kinda shitty though.

                • Bittersweet
                  Bittersweet
                  March 26, 2024 at 7:18 pm | #

                  That part does suck because I did actually suffer a side effect that was not known but not told to me as a result of the COVID vaccine. But stuff that changes your period length and heaviness only affects women, so nobody cared. As for me, I now need to be on BC for the rest of my life because extending my period by a week meant it never ended. Screwed up all my chances of ever having more kids, etc.

                  But like… my mom got cancer and my dad was diabetic, and I myself have always had weak lungs. I’d get the shot in every universe, it just sucks hard that we weren’t warned about that side effect because scientists decided it didn’t change our quality of life.

                • Bittersweet
                  Bittersweet
                  March 26, 2024 at 7:19 pm | #

                  Known but not told to me*, it was in literature and in testing, but they didn’t report it until basically forced to.

        • Nicoleandmaggie
          Nicoleandmaggie
          March 26, 2024 at 4:52 am | #

          It was bipartisan idiots even then. It’s just Jenny McCarthy was in the news and not the right wing nut jobs. (Looked it up when I was on a crazy mama forum).

        • Daibhid C
          Daibhid C
          March 26, 2024 at 6:15 am | #

          I feel like that’s happened with a lot of things, because the right has to be against anything the left is pro, and vice versa. Like, it’s far more trivial, but I remember when Disney+ released The Muppet Show and the right was fulminating about the content warnings because this was the WOKE LEFT trying to CANCEL the Muppets, and why would anyone want to cancel the Muppets?

          And I thought “Dudes, it’s less than a decade since they did that ABC show, and One Million Moms was literally trying to cancel it. They made a joke about it on the show.”

          As far as vaccinations go, my Mum was a bit hippieish (she was the secretary of the local folk music club and protested various things) but absolutely pro-vaccination. Although when I got my autism diagnosis, while the knowledge that Andrew Wakefield was a big fat liar was still perlocating through the media, I had to reassure her that there was no connection, and even if there was, it would still have been the right decision.

          • Daibhid C
            Daibhid C
            March 26, 2024 at 6:17 am | #

            Just realised “the right has to be against anything the left is pro, and vice versa.” is ambiguous. I meant the right also has to be pro anything the left is against, not the left also has to be against anything the right is pro. As a lefty, I believe that the left is usually (but not always) pro or against things for actual reasons.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          March 26, 2024 at 7:11 am | #

          Yeah and that’s a terrifying development. When they were a bipartisan fringe thing, antivaxxers weren’t too dangerous. Now that it’s a partisan tribal identity marker in the culture war, the numbers have exploded.

          I think the crunchy liberal ones are still around, they’re just massively outnumbered by right-wingers radicalized by Covid conspiracy theories.

        • Dorje Sylas
          Dorje Sylas
          March 26, 2024 at 11:37 am | #

          The horseshoe bends into a circle. The Far Right and the Far Left will jump the gap and cross-pollinate through Conspiracy idolization. And a big ugly narcissist threw his ego down as a wide bridge during 2020.

      • AbacusWizard
        AbacusWizard
        March 26, 2024 at 12:32 am | #

        I think the one thing that has *most* flabbergasted me in the last four years is how many people have joined the war against germs on the side of the germs.

        • Dara
          Dara
          March 26, 2024 at 1:37 am | #

          yeah. I mean, AIDS, and people cheering it on, but that was other people. now it’s themselves

          Party of Plague gonna plague-party on apparently

        • Jon
          Jon
          March 26, 2024 at 9:20 am | #

          Seanan McGuire (as “Mira Grant”) wrote an excellent series of novels and stories in the previous decade based on the idea that two genetically-engineered viruses (a modified Ebola virus to cure cancer that wasn’t supposed to be transmissible, and a viral cold cure that wasn’t supposed to be released) met in the wild and became a zombie virus. Every mammal is infected, and any mammal over 40 lbs will become a zombie when it dies. If your viral colony is exposed to another, say by a bite, it “amplifies”, and you go zombie too. The first novel, “Feed”, opens about 20 years after the first outbreak; most people are okay because they undertake moderately-elaborate precautions to avoid amplification.

          Seanan has said that she can’t revisit that universe any more because it seems too optimistic now. She never thought there’d be people demanding the right to be bitten by zombies, and utterly refusing to use the testing machines or take bleach showers after potential exposure.

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        March 26, 2024 at 1:54 am | #

        I grew up in West Virginia, but my people were Catholic (5% minority in W.Va.), which was better in some ways and worse in others. I became an atheist at 14, but I had nightmares of going to hell until I was 35. I got my polio vaccine in 1954, which makes me one of the test group. I’m terribly proud of that.

      • Rabid Rabbit
        Rabid Rabbit
        March 26, 2024 at 2:08 am | #

        Hell, even in early DoA Joyce was busy getting her flu vaccine because you have to get it every year. Even if you don’t believe in evolution.

        I wonder if Sarah ever got her popcorn that time.

    • Nono
      Nono
      March 26, 2024 at 12:42 am | #

      Remember it wasn’t that long ago that Joyce didn’t believe in evolution (except for flu viruses clearly that’s different).

      If the comic was written like ten years ago Joyce might be antivax at the time too.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 7:08 am | #

        Yup, retroactively there’s almost no way that the Browns didn’t go antivax during Covid.
        Anti-mask too.

    • butting
      butting
      March 26, 2024 at 2:18 am | #

      Even uglier: antisemitic antivaxer.

  10. TJ
    TJ
    March 26, 2024 at 12:07 am | #

    You can never go back. Upside is usually by the time you realize this you don’t want to.

  11. HueSatLight
    HueSatLight
    March 26, 2024 at 12:07 am | #

    You don’t have to capitalize any god’s pronouns, Joyce, that’s a religion thing, not a grammar thing.

    • Nathan
      Nathan
      March 26, 2024 at 12:18 am | #

      Tristan does capitalize His though, so it would make sense to have consistent style.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 12:31 am | #

        I have to concentrate to have a consistent style. I accidentally capitalize nouns sometimes, on account of minoring in German, where that’s the norm. There’s even a famous book about it.

        • AbacusWizard
          AbacusWizard
          March 26, 2024 at 12:33 am | #

          “a famous book about it”

          This joke is so brilliant that I am going to have to steal it.

          • Vanessa
            Vanessa
            March 26, 2024 at 12:38 am | #

            Tristian is not a very good writer, is he? Grammar and logic are not his strong points.

            • BarerMender
              BarerMender
              March 26, 2024 at 1:56 am | #

              I guess it stands to reason his education would be raggedy.

          • AbacusWizard
            AbacusWizard
            March 26, 2024 at 12:59 am | #

            Update: I told this joke to my spouse, who speaks German, and in response I got a glare and a slow thumbs-down. Calling this a success!

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              March 26, 2024 at 2:23 pm | #

              A Kapital offense.

        • butting
          butting
          March 26, 2024 at 2:19 am | #

          DAMN YOU WILLIS HUESATLIGHT

        • Felian
          Felian
          March 26, 2024 at 5:03 am | #

          haha, nice one.

      • bemisawa
        bemisawa
        March 26, 2024 at 3:50 am | #

        Arguably, it would make sense to be consistent about a lot of things, but that never sees to stop anyone. :/

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      March 26, 2024 at 12:39 am | #

      Also, Tristan, you don’t capitalize “God” in “a god”. It’s just like sometimes there’s a guy, and his name is Guy, but you don’t start capitalizing every time you write the word guy.

      • Rabid Rabbit
        Rabid Rabbit
        March 26, 2024 at 2:04 am | #

        Except you do, because there’s only one real god! And it’s his name! Except for that thing the Jews are always going on about that you’re not allowed to say! But they’re Jews, so what would they know about the god of Abraham???

        It’s like saying “Jerome stopped me from going dancing on the train tracks at freight-train o’clock when I was drunk that one time. I’m glad there was a Jerome there to stop me.”

        Except, y’know, about his imaginary friend.

        • eh, whatever
          eh, whatever
          March 26, 2024 at 6:24 am | #

          Funny how you’re picking Jerome. Hieronymus is literally “the one of the holy name”.

    • Felian
      Felian
      March 26, 2024 at 5:04 am | #

      i trained myself to stop capitalizing god and their pronouns. SOMEHOW THAT’S STILL HARD.

      • milu
        milu
        March 26, 2024 at 9:28 am | #

        FUCK yOU, gOD

  12. Armadillo
    Armadillo
    March 26, 2024 at 12:08 am | #

    Also vaccines. Because it’s always also vaccines.

    • Kimi
      Kimi
      March 26, 2024 at 12:15 am | #

      And oddly enough guns. I don’t know what in the world Jesus has to do with guns since he even seemed to be against violence against an oppressive regime that was arresting him, but what do I know?

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 12:46 am | #

        He came not to spread peace, but the sword.

        And mixed messages even about violence against the Romans arresting him, he told his buds to sell their coats to have money to buy swords if they didn’t have enough.

        • Kimi
          Kimi
          March 26, 2024 at 2:46 am | #

          There are some theories that owning the swords was just to help justify them arresting him and not to actually perpetrate violence, hence the rebuke at the garden of Gethsemane and the “not to spread peace, but the sword” as allegorical in context. I don’t know for sure, but it just seems odd to me to link up things like letting them hit the other cheek or pray for those who persecute you with guns and violence. The old testament is quite full of violence though, and I tend to hear that quoted more by gun toting Christians. That or revelations, which is like a weird fever dream that some people take literally rather than a symbolic reference to someone’s thoughts on the Roman empire, which qould make more sense in historical context. It is not unusual for fables to be used to make a political point when political points can result in your death or worse.
          I just find the idea of Jesus being a gun toting marine wrapped in the US flag, like they have put on shirts and other things, to be a bizarre understanding of a person that supposedly went willingly to his horrible death. Just one of those things where it feels like a completely different religion depending on which faction you look at.

          • lyzyrdwyzyrd
            lyzyrdwyzyrd
            March 26, 2024 at 7:28 am | #

            It’s worth noting that the kindness and mercy positions of Jesus were derived from concepts in the Hebrew Bible as well. Those were not new.

            • Kimi
              Kimi
              March 26, 2024 at 5:03 pm | #

              Yeah. If I recall right, stuff in the dead sea scrolls was even more similar than other information we had before that.

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            March 26, 2024 at 9:57 am | #

            there’s always theories to try to make an anthology, written by different authors who had contradictory views, somehow 100% consistent. Always popular: the parts someone doesn’t like are a metaphor.

            “Sell your cloaks and buy swords” is from Luke.
            “He who lives by the sword dies by the sword” is from Matthew.

            • Kimi
              Kimi
              March 26, 2024 at 5:11 pm | #

              I was more thinking of Luke 22:50-51, one of the disciples struck the high priest’s servant and cut off his right ear and Jesus responds in saying, “No more of this!” And he touched his ear and healed him.” than Matthew.

        • Mark
          Mark
          March 26, 2024 at 8:04 am | #

          Not peace, but the sword: well, it was gonna happen. Like, we don’t engage in a particular chemical reaction because it creates an unwanted precipitate; it just does and we do this because we want some other result of the reaction.

          I read that line as “don’t expect everything to be sweetness and light now, but good will come in spite of strife and many will eventually get over it.”

      • Amelie Wikström
        Amelie Wikström
        March 26, 2024 at 7:36 am | #

        Well, Historical Jesus was a Jewish nationalist revolutionary and that message gets sort of confused in the Bible as it puts him on a mission of peace for all mankind, but somehow I don’t think it’s out of a desire to free Palestine from the Romans that these people want their guns. . .

        • RonF
          RonF
          March 26, 2024 at 11:17 am | #

          Jesus was a Jewish nationalist revolutionary? “Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s and to God that which is God’s” doesn’t sound like a Jewish nationalist revolutionary to me. I don’t recall him telling people to resist or attempt to overthrow the existing civil power structure at all.

          • Amelie Wikström
            Amelie Wikström
            March 26, 2024 at 11:54 am | #

            You can read all about it starting here https://www.shortpacked.com/comic/sapphoris

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              March 26, 2024 at 2:45 pm | #

              You know he basically make that up, right? The events may well be real, but we have no reason to think Jesus was involved. We know nothing about his early life beyond the very likely invented birth and childhood narratives.

              His message seems to have been apocalyptic, but it’s not clear that it was revolutionary. Take care of the poor and follow the Torah Law so that you are counted as righteous when God sweeps the unrighteous away and establishes the Kingdom.

              • Amelie Wikström
                Amelie Wikström
                March 26, 2024 at 6:15 pm | #

                Yes, the book is very clear about how its Historical Jesus is a hypothesis built on the most likely course of events. I recall specifically a line about how unlikely it would be to think he would be “uninvolved” in the political issues that every other itinerant apocalyptic preacher who went around doing miracles and gathering followers in this period got crucified for.

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            March 26, 2024 at 8:40 pm | #

            The Romans crucified non-Romans for insurrection.
            The people who wrote the Bible decades after Jesus died, if he existed, were trying to convince the Empire they weren’t with the people who were rising up.

    • True Survivor
      True Survivor
      March 26, 2024 at 1:03 am | #

      Yet in his deplorable ignorance, he is *technically* right on vaccines: they are globalist.

      They work best when used world-wide to provide herd-immunity across populations thus eliminating pockets which foster mutation, they are often created and sometimes provided by institutions funded by multinational corporations (like the Gate Foundation in its attempts to eradicate polio), and have proven a powerful means of fostering transnational cooperation (such as when the USSR and USA worked together via the WHO to eradicate small pox).

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        March 26, 2024 at 2:00 am | #

        Unfortunately, “globalist” has replaced “cosmopolitan” as a dog whistle for “Jewish.”

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          March 26, 2024 at 4:37 am | #

          Same goes for just about all the other catch-all snarl words conservatives use to refer to everything they hate about the left.

          See also: “postmodernist”, “elitist”, “Cultural Marxist”, “funded by George Soros”.

          • RonF
            RonF
            March 26, 2024 at 11:19 am | #

            “Funded by George Soros” has nothing to do with his religion or nationality and everything to do with the policies promulgated by the people he supports.

            • milu
              milu
              March 26, 2024 at 11:30 am | #

              oh you sweet cupcake. or raging antisemite. it’s one or the other

              • NGPZ
                NGPZ
                March 26, 2024 at 11:54 am | #

                Yee, it don’t follow no logic with them reactionaries.

                They spread these snarls around like 12-year-olds who just discovered the word “communist” 😑

                • milu
                  milu
                  March 26, 2024 at 2:22 pm | #

                  i mean, possibly what Ronf meant to say is “the alt-right focus on Soros not because he’s jewish but bc he supports progressive politics, that’s what they’re mad about”.

                  except it absolutely can be, and is, both

                • NGPZ
                  NGPZ
                  March 26, 2024 at 5:10 pm | #

                  hence the concept of a dog whistle — it’s so only their fellow antisemite “dogs” can hear it 👀

            • Bryy
              Bryy
              March 27, 2024 at 4:21 am | #

              ….. dude you might want to fucknig clarify that statement.

        • Mark
          Mark
          March 26, 2024 at 8:07 am | #

          Perhaps “Jewish” is (for those who use it pejoratively) itself a dog-whistle for “everything that is not exactly like us.”

          • milu
            milu
            March 26, 2024 at 9:31 am | #

            No, using Jewish pejoratively is not a “dog whistle”. It’s just antisemitism

      • David DeLaney
        David DeLaney
        March 26, 2024 at 2:27 am | #

        and they are THE greatest advance in medicine in the last few _hundred_ years

        –Dave, I personally rank them above anaesthesia even

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          March 26, 2024 at 7:17 am | #

          Second only to making doctors wash their hands.

        • drs
          drs
          March 26, 2024 at 1:35 pm | #

          Oral rehydration therapy is considered up there, helps keep people dying from diarrhea diseases like cholera. Less of a big deal in the West because we have clean water and don’t get cholera. So clean water should be up there on the list of big life-savers, too.

      • Felian
        Felian
        March 26, 2024 at 5:05 am | #

        The global conspiracy to keep everyone alive and healthy.
        THIS IS THE FUTURE THE LEFTISTS WANT.
        <3

        • milu
          milu
          March 26, 2024 at 9:33 am | #

          Except that is literally what the bigots hate. The “everyone” part.

          • Felian
            Felian
            March 26, 2024 at 6:51 pm | #

            Which is odd, because the bigots are PART of EVERYONE.
            I want THEM to be alive, healthy, even HAPPY. Social justice is benefiting everyone.

            • milu
              milu
              March 26, 2024 at 7:10 pm | #

              well, but that’s not quite true, now is it? as the name implies, “social justice” will require arbitrations.

              Should we prioritize drinking water for all, or the convenience of golfers and agrobusiness profits? You can’t have both. A lot of bigotry is about material class struggle.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                March 26, 2024 at 11:47 pm | #

                Mmmmfuck golfers. Not even a valid sport. No skill involved. Even I can put a ball in a hole very easily, they’re just making it difficult for themselves on purpose. Simply walk up to the hole and put the ball in, idiots. You don’t need an entire field for this.

                • Felian
                  Felian
                  March 28, 2024 at 5:59 am | #

                  I don’t even want to hate on the *sport itself*, what i criticise about golf is basically “look, i can afford to keep all this lawn instead of planting crops on it“, and creating a wasteland of english lawn where biodiversity or a publicly used space could be instead.

              • HueSatLight
                HueSatLight
                March 27, 2024 at 12:37 pm | #

                Fie on wasteful irrigation too. If your crop needs that much irrigation, you’re growing the wrong thing in the wrong place.

                Also lawn.

              • Felian
                Felian
                March 28, 2024 at 6:00 am | #

                Yeah, sure, *social justice* does mean giving away unreasonably high living standards. Sure, it’s not true that we wouldn’t *take anything from them*.
                But we’d start at the top 1% where they wouldn’t *actually* notice all that much whether their bank account has a 0 more or less…

  13. Savail
    Savail
    March 26, 2024 at 12:09 am | #

    “Joyce, who cares what’s in the Bible?”

    “What’s in the Bible is very important! Very few people are saying this!! but it’s a position I’ve always maintained.”

    Always doing a lot of lifting there.

    • Savail
      Savail
      March 26, 2024 at 12:10 am | #

      Grah, I didn’t put “Always” in quotes. This bugs me.

      • thakoru
        thakoru
        March 26, 2024 at 1:32 am | #

        Old boyfriend: “Always” doing a lot of lifting
        New boyfriend: Always doing a lot of lifting

    • KM
      KM
      March 26, 2024 at 12:20 am | #

      Presumably he is still of the generation whose youthful indiscretions are not plastered all over the internet for all the see, forever.

    • Vulcanodon
      Vulcanodon
      March 26, 2024 at 7:58 am | #

      I don’t remember the phrase “… very few people are saying this!” before Trump. Could be that puts him in the Trumpy camp as well.

      • Schpoonman
        Schpoonman
        March 26, 2024 at 5:21 pm | #

        The irony of “…very few people are saying this!” being a completely true statement, because the rest is a lie that he’s propagating, sometimes for the first time, so it wouldn’t be said by many people at all.

        • Bryy
          Bryy
          March 26, 2024 at 11:15 pm | #

          Also, “very few people are saying this” is indicative of just how small someone’s worldview is.

    • Mark
      Mark
      March 26, 2024 at 8:09 am | #

      This gives me furiously to think about classmates who seem to have turned into unthinking channels for cheap plastic propaganda reposts.

  14. Bittersweet
    Bittersweet
    March 26, 2024 at 12:11 am | #

    Well yeah, Joyce, God’s pronouns are case sensitive.

    (I’m no longer a Christian yet I also constantly capitalize God pronouns and I know it’s not necessary, but it also doesn’t feel like correct English to stop. Such are the side effects of going to private Christian school in early elementary I guess.)

    • Jamie
      Jamie
      March 26, 2024 at 12:24 am | #

      I like capitalizing God’s pronouns because I think it’s funny. It’s a choice that only really makes sense in English, anyways.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      March 26, 2024 at 12:24 am | #

      “Correct” (White Christian) English in America — is it vanilla? No, it’s nothing but milk and sugar. Apparently where other English dialects are flavors, theirs forms the base.

      Same reason why “God” by itself in English can be almost always trusted to express the concept of the Christian God in particular, without the other person asking “which god?” — social privilege.

      • Vanessa
        Vanessa
        March 26, 2024 at 12:44 am | #

        As we have found out whenever “politics” is suppressed (like Facebook is doing now) the status quo is never “political”. The Wall Street Journal is not ever “political” but Mother Jones, ProPublica, and NPR are. Skating along celebrating the slaughter of the natives on Columbus Day is status quo, asking if George Bush and the British monarchs might have done some bad things is “politics.”

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          March 26, 2024 at 1:34 am | #

          Yeah, as knee-jerky as it is for many people, there’s really no such thing as “keeping out of politics”, all issues are political issues, for the simple fact that creating a free, fair government is an ongoing process and always will be.

          Those who hope to reconcile some kind of “neutral point of view” do so because they cling to the tired premise that most democracies in the world having a right and left wing makes both sides equally moral and valid somehow. There’s no demonstrable or empirical pathway that supports this notion at ALL. Just Old Liberal sentiment that saying the contrary aloud is being closed-minded and ungracious. A standard the right does NOT hold themselves to in return.

      • Jonathan
        Jonathan
        March 26, 2024 at 1:53 am | #

        Just like “America” can be reliably interpreted as meaning “The United States of America”

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          March 26, 2024 at 4:11 am | #

          Irony acknowledged.

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      March 26, 2024 at 6:23 am | #

      Given how important God’s pronouns seem to be, it’s amazing how many Christians are convinced their god doesn’t have any.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 8:29 am | #

        If pronouns are biological, does God have biology?

        • milu
          milu
          March 26, 2024 at 9:43 am | #

          I mean Jesus is carbon-based.
          Therefore, God acquired pronouns when He was made flesh.
          Therefore the deniers of Jesus’ divinity (ie the Jews) need the fiction that pronouns can be non-biology-based otherwise they can’t refer to God, and that’s really impractical.
          Therefore, the trans agenda is a Jewish conspiracy.
          This all makes total sense!

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            March 26, 2024 at 8:48 pm | #

            I’m a bad ally, He/Him are the Christian god’s neopronouns, and I don’t respect them.

  15. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    March 26, 2024 at 12:11 am | #

    It’s times like this that make me grateful she’s with Joe.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      March 26, 2024 at 2:53 am | #

      I can see that. But for me, it’s the times when Joyce freaks out and Joe has to poke her with a broom to get her down from the ceiling that make me grateful.

  16. Matticus
    Matticus
    March 26, 2024 at 12:18 am | #

    Oof. You know that he says “globalists” with a hard “J.”

    • JR
      JR
      March 26, 2024 at 1:12 am | #

      I have never heard this expression before and it is fantastic.

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      March 26, 2024 at 8:30 am | #

      That’s actually kinda hard for me to say, but losing the first L guves you “Jobalists” like the Biblical Job, and that’s funny to me.

      • june gloom
        june gloom
        March 26, 2024 at 4:20 pm | #

        That’s… not what Matticus meant.

        • Schpoonman
          Schpoonman
          March 26, 2024 at 5:18 pm | #

          I know, “globalist” is a dog whistle for Jews, it’s anti-semitism, I just find “Jobalists” funny.

  17. GreedOfGram
    GreedOfGram
    March 26, 2024 at 12:19 am | #

    Reminds me of when I unfollowed a former roommate because he kept flooding my feed with bible verses.

    • Mark
      Mark
      March 26, 2024 at 8:13 am | #

      Sometimes I think that sort of behavior reeks of desperation. Like, “if I repeat this stuff until everyone goes numb maybe I will actually believe it.”

  18. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    March 26, 2024 at 12:20 am | #

    The “globalist” thing, hmm, maybe Joyce’s mom was even further off the mark in thinking Tristan was part of a pattern of Joyce being into Jewish dudes just due to Tristan being Polish.

  19. Moon
    Moon
    March 26, 2024 at 12:22 am | #

    oh no this bongo is going to show up and give everybody JN.1

    • RassilonTDavros
      RassilonTDavros
      March 26, 2024 at 12:46 am | #

      JN.1? What’s that?

      • drs
        drs
        March 26, 2024 at 1:06 am | #

        The globally and nationally dominant strain of covid-19 at the moment.

        “The CDC estimated that the variant accounted for 44% of cases in the US on 22 December 2023 and 62% of cases on 5 January 2024.[114]

        As of 9 February 2024, JN.1 was estimated by the WHO to be the most prevalent variant of SARS-CoV-2 (70–90% prevalence in four out of six global regions; insufficient data in the East Mediterranean and African regions)”

        So you know, nothing big. /s

        • DinaJoyce
          DinaJoyce
          March 26, 2024 at 1:27 am | #

          *plugs ears* la la la la la COVID WENT AWAY OBVIOUSLY. ITS ALL DONE!!! Joe Biden and Donald Trump agree its all over, so obviously there is no reason to know anything about it anymore! *continues plugging ears and avoiding looking at any data anywhere*

          (As far as I can tell, this is how we have all collectively agreed to behave about covid now? Including the CDC and maybe the WHO?)

          • Daibhid C
            Daibhid C
            March 26, 2024 at 6:37 am | #

            And the UK governnment, who’s current policy appears to be summed up as “Covid vaccines are a great British achievement that we should all be pround of but you can’t actually get one.”

        • RassilonTDavros
          RassilonTDavros
          March 26, 2024 at 2:38 am | #

          Ah, thanks for the info. I can’t keep all the variants straight, and when I tried to Google it I instead got results about “John 1” for some reason. (Didn’t do it when I searched it again just now— weird.)

          • Mark
            Mark
            March 26, 2024 at 8:19 am | #

            That was my first thought: the first chapter of the Gospel of John. In context it made juuust enough sense….

            (For those who are wondering what all this is about, the four Gospels are abbreviated Mt, Mk, Lk, Jn.)

        • Mark
          Mark
          March 26, 2024 at 8:15 am | #

          Is it just me, or do the names they give the various strains seem to be generated by some random process to guarantee that you can never tell which is current?

          • milu
            milu
            March 26, 2024 at 9:51 am | #

            They’re named based on mutations, it’s a nomenclature that is meant to make sense for scientists, not the general public.

            Also, several of them will be current at any time

            • Mark
              Mark
              March 26, 2024 at 5:31 pm | #

              But they want the general public to take care of themselves, so we kind of have to be able to make some sense of it. This COVID 3.11, COVID NT, COVID 7, COVID Vista stuff is Not Helpful.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                March 26, 2024 at 7:24 pm | #

                The public can largely Go Fuck Itself™, as far as most organizations care, especially when it comes to information.

  20. Mollyscribbles
    Mollyscribbles
    March 26, 2024 at 12:23 am | #

    did pre-DoA Joyce make a monkey’s paw wish for Tristan to grow up to be the type of godly man she wanted him to be?

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      March 26, 2024 at 12:51 am | #

      I feel like even back then, she’d be annoyed as shit about his misrepresenting his past.

    • True Survivor
      True Survivor
      March 26, 2024 at 12:55 am | #

      1)This made me smile. Thank you.

      2)Unfortunately, I doubt it – asking a severed monkey hand for favors sounds pretty Satanist. However, maybe there is a God out there answering her prayers. He just has a sick sense of humor?

      • C.T. Phipps
        C.T. Phipps
        March 26, 2024 at 1:06 am | #

        *Willis looks up from drawing board*

        Hmm?

      • NGPZ
        NGPZ
        March 26, 2024 at 1:07 am | #

        “Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it.”

        • David DeLaney
          David DeLaney
          March 26, 2024 at 2:31 am | #

          obOldOldReference: *the Incredible Mr. Limpet intensifies*

          –Dave, back then you’d’ve hadta go TO THE LIBRARY to look up what that was, and even then you’d need a helpful librarian who knew what category (films) it fell under to get started with

      • Mollyscribbles
        Mollyscribbles
        March 26, 2024 at 4:15 am | #

        tbh I was using “monkey’s paw” as shorthand for any form of wish that ended up being granted in a horrifying way. So, prayer counts.

  21. Zamperla
    Zamperla
    March 26, 2024 at 12:31 am | #

    I love how on top of everything else nightmarish here, the assertion of AND I HAVE ALWAYS CARED VERY MUCH ABOUT WHAT’S STRICTLY IN THE BIBLE is absolutely going to drive her nuts.

    • Vanessa
      Vanessa
      March 26, 2024 at 12:45 am | #

      Haha, clearly he is a hypocrite too.

  22. JA
    JA
    March 26, 2024 at 12:34 am | #

    Tristan turned out exactly as we thought he would.

  23. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    March 26, 2024 at 12:37 am | #

    Still thinking of looking up old crushes on FaceBook after this?

    Just know that once you start diving down that rabbit hole, we can’t help you.

    • David DeLaney
      David DeLaney
      March 26, 2024 at 2:32 am | #

      no, no. (oh no, oh no, oh no nonooo…) I stay the hell AWAY from Zuckerberg’s data-mining goliath.

      –Dave, the users have NEVER been its customers, or how it makes money

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        March 26, 2024 at 4:38 am | #

        I feel like the users are how it makes money? Harder to make money without something to sell.

        • David DeLaney
          David DeLaney
          March 26, 2024 at 10:13 pm | #

          oh sweet summer child

          it has always had something to sell – to ADVERTISING COMPANIES

          namely, great heaping mountains of data on what people Like or Don’t Like, who they associate with, what groups they’re in, ages and weights and colors and genders and occupations and…

          He became filthy rich off _that_, not off selling Facebook Premium subscriptions or t-shirts

          same reason Twitter got so valuable: data for advertisers

          • Yumi
            Yumi
            March 27, 2024 at 3:42 am | #

            Hi, fuck off with that “sweet summer child” bit when you completely missed the point of my comment.

            I was saying that it sells its user base, not that it sells *to* its user base. Same as your point, without trying to be condescending about it.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      March 26, 2024 at 4:39 am | #

      There might be better ways to learn about an old crush. For example, they might now have a podcast.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 9:04 pm | #

        Or they might call you out of the blue, when you’re kind of a mess and also are a day away from going to the ER with a giant kidney stone.

  24. Vukodlak
    Vukodlak
    March 26, 2024 at 12:41 am | #

    Plot twist, it was Joyce’s unwavering devotion to god that converted him.

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      March 26, 2024 at 5:01 pm | #

      A real C.S. Lewis-J.R.R. Tolkein situation we’ve got going on here.

  25. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    March 26, 2024 at 12:45 am | #

    …Oh. Oh shit.

    …Joyce 100 percent told an Adult™ about what Tristan and Tara were doing and he got sent to the Intensive Brainwashing Unit for living in sin. Everything went horribly, horribly right.

    …I’d been hoping Tristan might have become someone Joyce could commiserate with, maybe even someone else who’d moved away from the faith.

    Guess not. Jury’s still out on Tara, though…?

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      March 26, 2024 at 8:32 am | #

      I don’t think she’d have been looking forward to seeing him when she visited La Porte before deconverting if she had got him sent away.

  26. Taffy
    Taffy
    March 26, 2024 at 12:49 am | #

    Tristan is definitely into guro.

  27. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    March 26, 2024 at 12:49 am | #

    Oh no Tristan is terrible

    • AbacusWizard
      AbacusWizard
      March 26, 2024 at 1:01 am | #

      astronaut with gun: “Always has been”

  28. Aura
    Aura
    March 26, 2024 at 12:49 am | #

    Ok but why does he post like the boomer relatives you forever regret accepting friend invites from?

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      March 26, 2024 at 1:06 am | #

      He has the same disease as them.

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      March 26, 2024 at 9:08 pm | #

      flashback time

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 11:48 pm | #

        link fail: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2010/comic/book-1/02-uphill-from-here/twitter/

        • AY
          AY
          March 27, 2024 at 12:06 am | #

          Oh my gosh they’re all so small and cute in 2010

    • anon
      anon
      March 27, 2024 at 2:16 am | #

      i mean, i shudder to think what “posting about religious faith in a gen z” way would look like tho i’m sure there are some unironic tiktoks about it and a handful of satire ones

  29. Sarah
    Sarah
    March 26, 2024 at 12:58 am | #

    I was a little worried about Joyce looking up an old crush, but this feels more like, “oh no if I’d somehow ended up with Tristan, would I have become this kind of person, too?”

    • Mark
      Mark
      March 26, 2024 at 8:24 am | #

      Or: “would I have gone through the same changes, and still been yoked to this?”

  30. thakoru
    thakoru
    March 26, 2024 at 12:58 am | #

    There but for the grace of non-existent God go I.

  31. NinjaNick
    NinjaNick
    March 26, 2024 at 12:59 am | #

    Tristan is one of those Losers now. Don’t waste your time on that Toeboy.

  32. ian livs
    ian livs
    March 26, 2024 at 1:19 am | #

    I mean, Joyce knowing what pronouns *actually* are already puts her way, way, wayyy ahead of 99% of people like Tristan or her mom or Toedad.

  33. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    March 26, 2024 at 1:24 am | #

    Tristan wearing what appears to be an orange shirt with a brown vest, what I think of as the ‘Classic Joyce’ outfit, feels symbolic.

  34. Icalasari
    Icalasari
    March 26, 2024 at 1:38 am | #

    😐

    Tristan…

    I will bite my tongue because I don’t want to go on a rant and contribute to potential comment section shutdown

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      March 26, 2024 at 8:33 am | #

      Fear is for the weak.

  35. Emil
    Emil
    March 26, 2024 at 1:49 am | #

    Am I the only one who’s completely lost as to what all the references to Tristan are all about? Why is he important all of a sudden?

    • Vivvav
      Vivvav
      March 26, 2024 at 1:51 am | #

      I think it’s about Joyce reconciling the first person she ever thought impure thoughts about back during her fundie days with her newly liberated anti-religious mindset.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 9:31 am | #

        Not just with her new liberated mindset, but also with her new actual serious boyfriend.

    • Bash
      Bash
      March 26, 2024 at 2:53 am | #

      This is the first time she’s dated someone without the idea that they would be married someday. She thinks back to somebody else who had a similar idea in her childhood, and wanted to know how he turned out. The results were not great.

    • DashWallkick
      DashWallkick
      March 26, 2024 at 3:10 am | #

      Tristan was tiny Joyce’s first crush. She’s again being violently confronted with how much she’s changed now that she’s a masturbating atheist on birth control and is again horrified to discover she was right to leave that the community she once had

  36. GUIGUI
    GUIGUI
    March 26, 2024 at 1:51 am | #

    How would Joyce feel if it turned out that the reason Tristan turned like this was because of her little “tantrum”when she saw him hang out with other girls and thought he should be more serious about being Christian so that Joyce would be willing to be his date?

    • Bash
      Bash
      March 26, 2024 at 2:54 am | #

      And yet he never contacted her or tried to keep in touch via facebook or anything?

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      March 26, 2024 at 6:20 am | #

      Nah. I think her crush on him was unrequited.

  37. Suet
    Suet
    March 26, 2024 at 2:23 am | #

    Kowalski, STATUS REPORT

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      March 26, 2024 at 8:34 am | #

      “Oh, you’re not gonna like this one, Skipper.”

    • Hof1991
      Hof1991
      March 26, 2024 at 10:04 am | #

      In four seasons, Kowalski never got a first name or promotion. Just stayed Seaman Kowalski. But he was better off than Sparks who only had a nickname.

  38. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    March 26, 2024 at 3:00 am | #

    Plot twist: Tristan and Tara are actually now Wiccans, and he just posts shit like this on his old Facebook page to satisfy his family enough that they won’t take a closer look at his life and learn the truth

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      March 26, 2024 at 3:25 am | #

      It’s not real Wicca unless it comes from the Wicca region. Anywhere else and it’s sparkling wine.

      • Mark
        Mark
        March 26, 2024 at 8:26 am | #

        🙂

    • milu
      milu
      March 26, 2024 at 10:00 am | #

      You’re just saying this because you want this to be a crossover with a BTVS AU where Tara is still alive.

      I see you and I raise you the fact that Tara being canonically gay means Tristan is as well and their relationship itself is also a front to protect their sexual identity

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        March 26, 2024 at 5:10 pm | #

        In five years the front will have developed into a genuine heteroromantic relationship, but it will still be an open relationship so that they can satisfy their sexual desires. Neither of them explicitly acknowledges to the other that they have developed romantic feelings because they feel that making any genuine attempt at romance would be a betraying the arrangement they made when they first set up the facade. Instead, both of them engage in the romance with their full hearts while pretending it’s just for pretend, believing the other’s expressions of love are merely counterfeits, delighting in imagining those displays are true while deep down “knowing” that they are false and also feeling guilt over having fallen in love with someone they promised never to fall in love with.

        Since they are already in a relationship, the fandom shippers have no idea what to root for, and their brains all simultaneously overheat and short-circuit.

  39. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    March 26, 2024 at 3:20 am | #

    “who care what’s in the bible, Joyce” — Tristan

  40. Sneakystorms
    Sneakystorms
    March 26, 2024 at 3:35 am | #

    This actually reminds me of an observation i saw someone make recently – that often it is the most sincerely devoted members who end up leaving their church over ethical complaints, while the people who stay are those who are just there by default and don’t think about it too hard

  41. Bobbi
    Bobbi
    March 26, 2024 at 3:42 am | #

    I looked up my ex-wife the other day and discovered that’s she’s going to have a baby with her new partner. Y’know, the thing she said she was never going to do, and forced me to reconcile myself to when we were together…

    I’m now on HRT that probably reduces my fertility, have decided not to have kids because I have heritable mental health conditions that it would be immoral to inflict on a child, and am electing to remain single, so it’s not an option for me, unless I try to adopt (which, as I understand it, is harder for a single person, let alone a single trans person)

    Sorry, I just meant to make the first comment then my brain ran away with me

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      March 26, 2024 at 8:12 am | #

      I’m so sorry. You seem like a wonderful nurturing person.

    • milu
      milu
      March 26, 2024 at 10:05 am | #

      I hope you find a way to be a parent outside the state-patriarchal biofamily.
      Lots of kids need good, caring adults, so if you’re so inclined you could be so precious to them.

      (And as an aside and stimulant, i recommend the short book “Against the Family” by Sophie Lewis, truly a delightful read)

  42. Amós Batista
    Amós Batista
    March 26, 2024 at 3:50 am | #

    I wonder what if Joyce and Tristan could exchange their lives. If Joyce had entered Tristan school and if he joined Indiana University.

  43. Woop de doop
    Woop de doop
    March 26, 2024 at 4:10 am | #

    His post from 3 days ago sounds like it could be a copypasta meme. Maybe even what Willis intended!!!

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      March 26, 2024 at 4:59 pm | #

      Yup. This is almost exactly what happened.

  44. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    March 26, 2024 at 4:27 am | #

    Joyce didn’t just dodge a bullet, she dodged the whole damn firing squad.

    • milu
      milu
      March 26, 2024 at 10:07 am | #

      Being shot at her out of a 19th-century circus cannon!?

      • CianM1301
        CianM1301
        March 26, 2024 at 2:57 pm | #

        Yes, and they are also shooting at her as they’re being shot at her.

        • milu
          milu
          March 26, 2024 at 4:47 pm | #

          also they are shooting poisoned bullets!!!

  45. PedanticJerkass
    PedanticJerkass
    March 26, 2024 at 6:06 am | #

    Close down the tab. Delete the cookies. Uninstall the browser. Format your HDD/SSD and start over entirely. Maybe burn it with fire first/instead, just for good measure. In any case, run away, Joyce. Run far, far away.

  46. DashWallkick
    DashWallkick
    March 26, 2024 at 6:07 am | #

    The one-two pattern of “Joyce, who cares what’s in the bible?” to being in your 20s and thinking gay people are going to Hell is entirely on point. It’s always the comfortable guy who is coasting and never has to try too hard who one day turns around and says gay people are satanic pedophiles because it’s the easiest path to more attention and comfort.

    • Zaxares
      Zaxares
      March 26, 2024 at 6:57 am | #

      I feel like sometimes it’s also the other way around when somebody’s who’s been coasting through life suddenly runs into difficulties (because global macroeconomics are a big, scary thing and bad things can happen to anyone at any point) and suddenly their life is no longer easy and they’re desperately looking around for someone or something to blame because the other two alternatives (that God has withdrawn their blessings because either a) they are not a good person, or b) because God does not exist) are too terrifying to accept.

      • DashWallkick
        DashWallkick
        March 26, 2024 at 10:41 am | #

        It can be — in fact, one of the people who went through that story arc is the protagonist of this comic — but I’m very used to dumb spoiled kids hitting the slightest friction and giving up on empathy of any kind.

  47. Azhrei Vep
    Azhrei Vep
    March 26, 2024 at 6:17 am | #

    Man, this just makes me slightly more glad than I normally am that I don’t use any kind of social media, or bother looking back at people I lost touch with.

    Just … leave the past in the past. It’s better for everyone.

    • Sharaku
      Sharaku
      March 26, 2024 at 6:39 am | #

      I didn’t even use social media all that much and things went so much better when i switched it off for good.

      Had to log into facebook for the first time in years recently because a friend had sent some documents through chat there. The few moments i spent staring at the feed was like an alien world of nonsense and doom.

    • lyzyrdwyzyrd
      lyzyrdwyzyrd
      March 26, 2024 at 7:43 am | #

      What’s dead should stay dead

      • milu
        milu
        March 26, 2024 at 10:09 am | #

        Tristan is alive!!! Except he… *lighting crack* …came back wrong.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 2:46 pm | #

        “That is not dead which can eternal lie …”

  48. Needfuldoer
    Needfuldoer
    March 26, 2024 at 6:18 am | #

    Joyce must feel at least a little shame, since those easily could’ve been her posts if she drank just a little more of the Flavor-Aid.

  49. Emily
    Emily
    March 26, 2024 at 7:28 am | #

    Hypothesis: Joyce and Becky leaving the fold has led to several of the members clamping down on their own offspring, and Tristan has figured out that if he pious-posts on Facebook roughly once a day it keeps Mom and Dad off his back.

    • staszu13
      staszu13
      March 26, 2024 at 9:09 am | #

      Interesting idea

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      March 26, 2024 at 2:20 pm | #

      Tristian is the Replacemennt Best Young of Church

      • Bryy
        Bryy
        March 26, 2024 at 4:58 pm | #

        oh CALLBACK.

  50. Just_IDD
    Just_IDD
    March 26, 2024 at 7:38 am | #

    So if everything belongs to god…
    doesn’t that imply vaccines also belong to god?
    Why are you denying god?

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      March 26, 2024 at 7:42 am | #

      But the illnesses also belong to God. If God wants you to die of a preventable illness, who are you to stop it? And if God wants you to get a vaccine, you’ll trip and fall into a needle or something, idk.

      • Mark
        Mark
        March 26, 2024 at 8:31 am | #

        But we don’t like illness, so the Devil must have invented it. Resisting evil is pious — get the vaccine!

        • milu
          milu
          March 26, 2024 at 10:11 am | #

          No, illness is good actually! it separates the wheat from the chaff!!! If your faith is strong you’ll be okay!!! *frozen grin and lack of blinking*

  51. Big Z
    Big Z
    March 26, 2024 at 7:46 am | #

    Facebook ChristianityPosting, at least as performed by people who aren’t me, has been the long-running antidote to any thoughts I’ve ever had about my own high school crushes/girlfriends, all of whom seem to live lives focused around mashing the “repost” button on anything that has the word “Jesus” in it.

  52. Vulcanodon
    Vulcanodon
    March 26, 2024 at 8:02 am | #

    I learned the hard way not to get into arguments online with old religious friends. Goes nowhere, ends up with slamming (virtual) doors, not a good experience.

  53. Pylgrim
    Pylgrim
    March 26, 2024 at 8:27 am | #

    Fuck, so relatable. This is me looking at FB profile of my highschool classmates and church mates back in my days. They all used to take christianity quite lightly (even if they were all nominally christian, as it’s usual where I grew up) and have a laugh or eyeroll at me for taking it more seriously. Now they have all become the exact same kind of feel-good Bible-verse spamming, preacher-speak parroting Ned Flanders-wannabes.

    And for those of them who get to know I am not a believer anymore, the condescencion couldn’t be thicker: “oh I once too lost my way, but thanks to the mercy of the Lord…”Dude stop; I haven’t even looked at a Bible in a decade and I’m pretty sure I could still whoop your God’s-promises-only ass in Biblical knowledge. While you were fucking your girlfriend, I was studying hermeneutics. While you had a stint with alcoholism I was being inducted into the first rungs of leadership in the church where I got to get disillusioned by realising how the sausage is made.

    So don’t come to me with your patronising aphorisms now after you did everything you wanted with your life until you finally got a bad break or the consequences of your actions and all of a sudden are feeling very pious as a way to silence the incipient realisations of your own mortality.

  54. Steamweed
    Steamweed
    March 26, 2024 at 8:45 am | #

    “Tristan, it’s good that you’re following the church’s teachings, but, c’mon, man, what about the English class’s teachings?”

  55. Aslan
    Aslan
    March 26, 2024 at 8:56 am | #

    This dude isn’t getting a single like or comment on his posts

    • milu
      milu
      March 26, 2024 at 10:14 am | #

      Oh shit good point

      What is going on

      • pope suburban
        pope suburban
        March 26, 2024 at 4:30 pm | #

        I almost wonder if this isn’t another Liz situation, where this is a performative public facebook page to placate parents/family/church members, but really Tristan is a pretty normal kid who doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about church. I mean I don’t know how likely that is, and I know plenty of real young people are this passionate about…uh, this stuff, but something about how over-the-top it all is makes me curious.

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      March 26, 2024 at 2:19 pm | #

      Guess who got shadowbanned?

  56. staszu13
    staszu13
    March 26, 2024 at 9:08 am | #

    Disappointed much, Joyce?

  57. Dave
    Dave
    March 26, 2024 at 9:38 am | #

    So, uh, maybe this will be unwelcome, but for any that need to read this, and on behalf of the people who follow Jesus but don’t subscribe to ‘nationalism’ or fundamentalism, or worshiping politics, politicians or using the Bible to force others to be like them or generally seek to have power that way: I’m very, very sorry. Personally, I think Jesus is real. I think what he taught was amazing and still relevant today. But the selfish have co-opted it and perverted his message to their own ends. Such as Tristan here in this strip and all like him. Honestly – I’m very sorry for those who don’t understand the Jesus they claim to follow. Example after example shows he met with people and gave them the choice whether to follow him. He didn’t overthrow the government or try to lobby religious leaders to make more rules for others to follow. He genuinely loved everyone and wanted the best for them. But let them choose for themselves. I read this comic and love the characters and I’m taken back to that age in life and remember how hard it was. For all who have been hurt by religion and the zealots, I wish for you a good life and hope you overcome and thrive through the many challenges life throws at you.

    • BorkBorkBork
      BorkBorkBork
      March 26, 2024 at 10:19 am | #

      I’m also a person of faith, and have come to the conclusion that 99% of American “Christianity” isn’t Christianity at all, but a bastard faith of showboating and one-upmanship and dick-measuring contests on how close to God one is. And if Christ came back today, the religious right would crucify him all over again for “wokeness.”

      But, uh. You’re right, that I don’t think anyone here probably wants a “He Gets Us” message.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 2:57 pm | #

        As so many Christians have thought, rightly or wrongly, over the millennia. Those over there who call themselves Christians aren’t really Christians.

        Then you get persecutions of heretics and inquisitions and sometimes even actual wars.

    • C.T. Phipps
      C.T. Phipps
      March 26, 2024 at 12:45 pm | #

      I love anarchist Jesus.

      Anarchist Jesus hated fundamentalists, war mongers, fascists, and wealthy people.

      He loved everybody but he hated these guys.

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      March 26, 2024 at 2:07 pm | #

      Hi Dave.
      You don’t need to apologize. As a genuine Christian, you don’t need to.
      They, the people that use Jesus as a tool of hate and control, they are the people that need to repent from their sins.

      Our mission, as people of faith, is to admonish our own brothers. Yes, it have to be on us.
      I’m inspired by the prophet I’ve took his name. Amos, on Bible, dared to condone the evil the rich and powerful inside his comunity!

      • Dave
        Dave
        March 27, 2024 at 8:59 am | #

        Well said – thanks for the encouragement. Good luck to you brother – I’ll try my best as well.

    • Mark
      Mark
      March 26, 2024 at 5:47 pm | #

      Hear, hear!

  58. Raen
    Raen
    March 26, 2024 at 9:40 am | #

    Let me guess, the most important verse to him is Revelation 2:9.

    • milu
      milu
      March 26, 2024 at 10:18 am | #

      “I know your afflictions and your poverty—yet you are rich! I know about the slander of those who say they are Jews and are not, but are a synagogue of Satan.”

      Huh. Why?

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 26, 2024 at 2:51 pm | #

        It’s used to paint Jews as the “synagogue of Satan”.

  59. Yeet
    Yeet
    March 26, 2024 at 9:41 am | #

    Obviously the vaccine thing is awful but I wonder if Joyce also feels weird about all this… demonstrative Jesus-ing.

  60. UrsulaDavina
    UrsulaDavina
    March 26, 2024 at 10:12 am | #

    Tristen’s upper head is very boxed shaped, no one has yet to say that and I feel obliged to point it out beacuse he is a bongo.

  61. milu
    milu
    March 26, 2024 at 10:20 am | #

    I’ve just realised the chapter title is a pun on “Tristan”.
    Lol, i hate it

  62. Synnerman
    Synnerman
    March 26, 2024 at 10:21 am | #

    Wow… I genuinely did not expect this twist. Poor Joyce.

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      March 26, 2024 at 12:01 pm | #

      Why this could be bad for Joyce?

      • Sam
        Sam
        March 26, 2024 at 4:16 pm | #

        It’s not directly bad like in the way a punch in the face is bad.

        It’s bad in that it sucks to know someone you used to have a crush on has changed in bad ways or possibly, hasn’t changed at all, while you have.

        We know Tristan was a hypocrite previously and a lot of people on Facebook behave performatively. So it could be that Tristan either a) grew to actually believe this stuff eventually or b) is still back home pretending he does and is stuck the way Joyce used to be, parroting beliefs to keep his community.

  63. milu
    milu
    March 26, 2024 at 10:34 am | #

    Oh also re: “would you look at this Tristan is a hypocrite”

    Yes and no, frankly. Bigots have double standards, but they typically don’t say so openly. They just mean XYZ differently when it applies to them and to “others”. That only sounds like hypocrisy because they don’t say the quiet part

  64. RonF
    RonF
    March 26, 2024 at 11:10 am | #

    What’s in the Bible is very important. But there’s nothing in the Bible that says that vaccines are a globalist conspiracy to . God gave us brains to understand how our bodies work, how our immune systems work and how to develop and use vaccines.

    I will say that while I quite willingly took the initial pair of mRNA-based COVID vaccines and the first booster, analyses of the vaccines have shown that the manufacturers have had shoddy Q.A. and there’s things in them (e.g., liposomes containing DNA instead of mRNA) that should not be. But that doesn’t invalidate the concept, just the execution.

    I’ve got a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Biochemistry. I’m also a member of a mainstream Protestant denomination. Despite what both fundamentalists and atheists will tell you, there’s no conflict between the Bible and science.

    • C.T. Phipps
      C.T. Phipps
      March 26, 2024 at 12:44 pm | #

      The Bible is a prop to a huge chunk of people. It says whatever they think it says and when it contradicts, often by the people in the text saying its a contradiction (like Jesus frequently did), they ignore it. Because it’s not a book of lessons, it’s a source of AUTHORTIYtm.

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      March 26, 2024 at 3:47 pm | #

      The Bible is literally a supernatural story.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 26, 2024 at 9:29 pm | #

        ah ah ah… two anthologies containing many supernatural stories. And all the testable claims in the Bible that are false are just poetic metaphors.

        I was raised in a mainline protestant church, and there were absolutely young earth creationists among the congregation.

    • Firseal
      Firseal
      March 26, 2024 at 4:38 pm | #

      Most Christians throughout history supported science. I remember one Christian Philosopher state that the Bible and Natural Science were both the books of the Lord. It only was once science became a threat to the faith of some of the more hardline (or, in some cases the power of the church) that some Christians decided to treat it as a threat. Christianity has no problem with science. Some Christians do, and they go on teaching their children that scism – not a scism of the church, but of faith or ‘faith’ and the rest of reality.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        March 27, 2024 at 4:25 pm | #

        Ibn Rushd had to tell Christendom causality existed.

  65. Pseudowolf
    Pseudowolf
    March 26, 2024 at 12:51 pm | #

    “Also vaccines are a globalist…”

    Annnnnd there it is.

  66. milu
    milu
    March 26, 2024 at 1:20 pm | #

    Oh hey, talking about how Joyce is a total perv!!!

    GANGBANG IN THE SKY

    NSFW, babies 🍆

    (this is taking me forever, for real. turns out drawing realistic five-people sex is HARD)

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      March 26, 2024 at 4:34 pm | #

      Floating sky sex sounds cool, tbh.

      • milu
        milu
        March 26, 2024 at 4:42 pm | #

        i know right???!!!! (ridiculously pleased with myself) (i mean with Joyce) (whose fantasies i’m only the humble scribe of)

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      March 26, 2024 at 10:59 pm | #

      Literature!

  67. Schpoonman
    Schpoonman
    March 26, 2024 at 1:28 pm | #

    Don’t scream into your own arm, Joyce. Scream into Joe’s arms. His big strong arms that could hoist you into the air like you didn’t weigh a thing…

    I’m sorry, what was the question?

    “You want my Bible, libruls? Well come kiss me for it!”

  68. Fred
    Fred
    March 26, 2024 at 3:38 pm | #

    Just to put this out there: I grew up in a mostly red-state part of Ohio, and a while ago found the FaceBook posts from a high school associate. Jennifer (name a coincidence) posts nonstop about the joy she feels after transitioning (and occasionally about how trapped she felt in high school), and I think every new outfit or hairstyle gets a full photoshoot in her living room. Not every HS person found on Facebook has taken a turn to the right.

  69. Bryy
    Bryy
    March 26, 2024 at 3:44 pm | #

    welp i was wrong.

  70. BBCC
    BBCC
    March 26, 2024 at 8:34 pm | #

    Welp, that bullet got dodged!

  71. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    March 26, 2024 at 9:38 pm | #

    Moral of the story: Don’t emulate Robin’s behavior.

So...

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Also, I see we're bringing back the ol' love octagon.
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Flash: Okay... wait thirty seconds, then give me a distraction.

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Okay, everyone's jumping to conclusions, but Joyce was hit with a mysterious pink gas in Thursday's strip. Now, in recent years, the police are known to increasingly use military grade weapons. Which reminded me of this bit of proposed technology from the 1990s: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_bomb
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Sal and Danny saw you from across the room and enjoy your vibe.
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