Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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June 14, 2026

Toy aisle

by David M Willis on January 17, 2025 at 12:01 am
  • 02 – The One Where Jocelyne Returns
└ Tags: amber, ethan

Discussion (153) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    January 17, 2025 at 12:02 am | #

    This is unhealthy. A relapse into a dangerous and self-destructive behavior that can only end in tears.

    Why can’t Ethan have a more constructive coping mechanism, like vigilantism?

    • True Survivor
      True Survivor
      January 17, 2025 at 12:09 am | #

      America is addicted plastics.

      • clif
        clif
        January 17, 2025 at 12:15 am | #

        What are the plastics addicted to?

        • Rolf of Many Doors
          Rolf of Many Doors
          January 17, 2025 at 1:13 am | #

          Americans

          • Zaxares
            Zaxares
            January 17, 2025 at 6:44 am | #

            I remember reading this factoid that said that, despite American children only accounting for like 3% of the world’s children, they own more than 20% of the world’s toys. O.o

            • Michael Steamweed
              Michael Steamweed
              January 17, 2025 at 8:16 am | #

              Our economy critically depends on consumerism. Us buying stuff. All the stuff.

            • Ymbrael
              Ymbrael
              January 17, 2025 at 10:29 am | #

              Kinda impressive coincidence that statistic almost perfectly lines up with the USA population and percent of the world’s imprisoned population (4% of the world population with 25% of the world prison population as of 2024 if I remember correctly). USA numbah one, in both treats and prison facilities/camps/whatever other spooky term used for foreign prisons to make them seem worse than the good old fashioned homegrown inhumanity centers.

            • JC
              JC
              January 17, 2025 at 1:44 pm | #

              We need more US children working factory jobs to make toys for the children of other nations.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                January 17, 2025 at 2:07 pm | #

                Honestly, I think we probably have enough toys on Earth right now to last several generations.

        • someone
          someone
          January 17, 2025 at 9:16 am | #

          Endocrine disruptors. They’re always full of those.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        January 17, 2025 at 3:09 am | #

        Good thing they’ll be with us forever! 😀

        …

        🙁

        • Paul
          Paul
          January 17, 2025 at 3:52 am | #

          Plastics are in your blood. I mean, literally, but also metaphorically.

          • SillyGoose
            SillyGoose
            January 17, 2025 at 5:34 am | #

            And on Wednesdays they wear pink.

        • Michael Steamweed
          Michael Steamweed
          January 17, 2025 at 8:17 am | #

          With us. In us.

      • HMRC4EVR
        HMRC4EVR
        January 18, 2025 at 12:01 am | #

        We don’t call it ‘plastic crack’ for nothing.

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      January 17, 2025 at 8:45 am | #

      Did Amber quit being Amazi-Girl because Blaine decided to cosplay as a supervillain, ruining the stabilizing effect being a superhero had?

      • Decidedly Orthogonal
        Decidedly Orthogonal
        January 17, 2025 at 11:15 am | #

        It seemed more like it wasn’t something they needed any more. Turns out though, that there are others that still need her.

    • Katosen27
      Katosen27
      January 18, 2025 at 6:50 pm | #

      Started with Shortpacked not too long after it started. I’ve been reading Willis comics since…gosh, 2006?

      Bloody hell.

  2. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    January 17, 2025 at 12:02 am | #

    Ethan discovers what his destiny is.

    To honor Mike, he must become…a toy store employee.

    • StClair
      StClair
      January 17, 2025 at 12:43 am | #

      Time is a flat circle.

      • DaveM
        DaveM
        January 17, 2025 at 1:08 am | #

        “Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.”: Douglas Adams.

        • CianM1301
          CianM1301
          January 17, 2025 at 3:32 am | #

          “Timeline? Time is not made out of lines, it is made of circles. That is why clocks are round.”
          ~Michael J. Caboose

          • Abel Undercity
            Abel Undercity
            January 17, 2025 at 6:17 am | #

            “People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually, from a nonlinear, non-subjective viewpoint, it’s more like a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey… stuff.”

            • Mark
              Mark
              January 17, 2025 at 7:05 am | #

              “Duration is an attribute of consciousness and not of the plenum.”

        • Ed Rhodes
          Ed Rhodes
          January 17, 2025 at 8:36 pm | #

          Oh, that’s very deep! You should write “Reader’s Digest,” they have a page for people like you!

      • Morleuca
        Morleuca
        January 17, 2025 at 8:43 am | #

        “Time is a weird soup” – Fearne

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      January 17, 2025 at 11:26 am | #

      Ethan: Someone is WRONG on the internet.

  3. gnomedeplume
    gnomedeplume
    January 17, 2025 at 12:03 am | #

    That Raphael mask is *not* reading the room.

  4. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    January 17, 2025 at 12:03 am | #

    Crazy Theory Time: While probably too dark even for this comic, Mike was not dead when Asher asked the police to take care of covering it up. Is it possible the officer didn’t just kill Blaine but also finished off a recovering Mike?

    • RassilonTDavros
      RassilonTDavros
      January 17, 2025 at 12:14 am | #

      I doubt it, but you never know.

    • Amelie Wikström
      Amelie Wikström
      January 17, 2025 at 12:16 am | #

      Seems like a big reach. They said (lying) Blaine tried to grab the cop’s gun, largely the only way you’d get away with murdering someone in a hospital. Going to another room to kill a second person, before or after, would be pretty much unthinkable. It’s MORE likely Mike didn’t actually die but got into deep witness protection, and that’s already a ridiculous idea.

      • Daibhid C
        Daibhid C
        January 17, 2025 at 7:24 am | #

        I think it’s unlikely, but my reading of detective stories suggests it’s actually (in fiction) quite easy to get away with murdering someone in a hospital, especially someone who it’s not clear is going to recover. You don’t shoot them, obviously. Also a good idea to make sure there aren’t any eccentric Belgians, little old ladies, or monocle-wearing toffs around.

        • JC
          JC
          January 17, 2025 at 1:48 pm | #

          Yeah, all you have to do is stop paying the bill, or get an insurance company to deny treatment. They do that often enough that 20 bucks in someone’s pocket ought to be enough.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        January 17, 2025 at 9:06 am | #

        There are significantly more ways to kill someone on life support than shooting them with a gun.

        • Amelie Wikström
          Amelie Wikström
          January 17, 2025 at 1:49 pm | #

          But how many of those ways is a cop going to come up with while in the middle of guarding/plotting to kill someone else?

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            January 17, 2025 at 4:05 pm | #

            And then carry out after shooting the first guy in a “fight over the gun” without drawing any attention in the ensuing panic and still being back in the first room ready with his story before security can respond.

            It also assumes that Blaine told them that he was lax enough with their secrets that the kid found evidence of the mob involvement.

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            January 17, 2025 at 7:11 pm | #

            Cops aren’t known for their creativity, but they can look up how hospital serial killers have done it without being noticed until after a long time.

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              January 17, 2025 at 7:13 pm | #

              or, you know, just mess with the life support so it’s not longer effectively supporting life.

    • Thag Simmons
      Thag Simmons
      January 17, 2025 at 12:16 am | #

      I’ve definitely seen it proposed, and it’s certainly possible.

      Sort of depends on what Willis wants to do with Asher, because I don’t think you come back from that.

      • Charles Phipps
        Charles Phipps
        January 17, 2025 at 8:31 am | #

        Yeah, it’d be only able to end with Asher leaving the strip forever.

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      January 17, 2025 at 9:05 am | #

      I’ve had my suspicion. Asher might have directed them at Blaine, to keep him from blabbing to his grandfather or ratting to the feds. But he would have only told them the second part. And Mike had been shouting in public he knew about the cops on the mob’s payroll. The cops could have gone after him, to tie up loose ends, with or without Asher’s explicit direction.
      But his noticing AG (and possibly looking for her at roller derby) suggest he might still be involved.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        January 17, 2025 at 4:06 pm | #

        “Shouting in public” in the middle of the night in a mostly deserted area. I guess someone in a nearby building could have heard?

        • HueSatLight
          HueSatLight
          January 17, 2025 at 7:07 pm | #

          not so late there there’s not still people around outside. https://www.dumbingofage.com/stooge/

    • Leaflet Erin
      Leaflet Erin
      January 17, 2025 at 9:58 am | #

      I’d say to big of a stretch for a corrupt cop on mafia payroll. But if the mafia is involved then it would be simple.to put a doctor or nurse on rotation. Inject something into the I.V. fudge the paperwork regarding cause of death and autopsy and cremate before anyone thinks to look closer.

      I mean you delve into true crime and doctor/nurse serial killers have been doing that kind of shit for way longer than I’m comfortable knowing. Top of my list is Harold Shipman, Michael Swango (admittedly terrible at it), and many nurses male and female. It’s scary easy.

  5. mindbleach
    mindbleach
    January 17, 2025 at 12:04 am | #

    Did he hear about it, or is she currently, and he just… knows?

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      January 17, 2025 at 12:05 am | #

      He saw her in costume and somehow didn’t think she was Sal.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        January 17, 2025 at 12:11 am | #

        Wait, that wasn’t Sal?

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          January 17, 2025 at 5:08 am | #

          No, it was definitely Sal. Sometimes people like to troll and say she’s not Amazi-Girl, despite all the evidence and explicit depictions of her taking of the costume.

          • Michael Steamweed
            Michael Steamweed
            January 17, 2025 at 8:21 am | #

            To be fair, not everyone has access to the Secret Patreon, which shows Naked Sal changing into her Amazi-Girl outfit.

          • Yumi
            Yumi
            January 17, 2025 at 1:01 pm | #

            Thanks for clarifying; I was really confused for a second.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      January 17, 2025 at 12:06 am | #

      See this strip.

    • CrimsonStorm
      CrimsonStorm
      January 17, 2025 at 7:29 am | #

      Not currently, check the tags (and cheek blush).11

    • DashWallkick
      DashWallkick
      January 17, 2025 at 8:10 am | #

      Ethan and Asher were in the lobby when she tangled with the costumed dork. I think they made eye contact even.

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      January 17, 2025 at 8:19 am | #

      He was right there. Standing with Asher in the commons.

  6. Jo_cubstar
    Jo_cubstar
    January 17, 2025 at 12:05 am | #

    Aww this is a perfect strip for a Shortpacked anniversary

  7. IntangibleMatter
    IntangibleMatter
    January 17, 2025 at 12:05 am | #

    Hey, you know who else died hard?

    • Proxiehunter
      Proxiehunter
      January 17, 2025 at 12:08 am | #

      I’d say Toe Dad but I think Blaine took him down pretty easy.

    • Aquila
      Aquila
      January 17, 2025 at 2:08 am | #

      Hans Gruber

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        January 17, 2025 at 3:15 am | #

        The best Christmas movie villain.

  8. Pocky
    Pocky
    January 17, 2025 at 12:06 am | #

    please don’t say he’s here to pester the staff about transformers toys they said they had on the website, but not in stock. . .

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      January 17, 2025 at 12:21 am | #

      That sounds more like a Duncan thing to do instead of Ethan.

  9. BBCC
    BBCC
    January 17, 2025 at 12:07 am | #

    Yay, they’re talking!

    • APW
      APW
      January 17, 2025 at 7:45 am | #

      So glad I’m mot the only one.

    • DashWallkick
      DashWallkick
      January 17, 2025 at 8:14 am | #

      I know I’m a Shortpacked convert and not a Walkyverse guy but it’s so nice to see Amber and Ethan being friends again. It’s slow going but I missed them.

  10. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    January 17, 2025 at 12:07 am | #

    It feels appropriate that I am currently opening up some GI Joes while reading this.

    (Croc Master and Fiona, and Junkyard and Mutt, respectively. Yes, I bought them for the animals they came with, primarily.)

  11. chaostails7
    chaostails7
    January 17, 2025 at 12:09 am | #

    Happy birthday to the universe!!

    • True Survivor
      True Survivor
      January 17, 2025 at 12:10 am | #

      Long may it reign!!!

      • NGPZ
        NGPZ
        January 17, 2025 at 1:41 am | #

        ^^ <3

        Happy birthday Shortpacked!

        Sonic's there in the back!

        ain't much in this aisle

        so let's call Ultra-Vac!

    • Amelie Wikström
      Amelie Wikström
      January 18, 2025 at 12:00 am | #

      Did you know, every day is the universe’s birthday! The real one anyway. Due to relativity and time dilating at different rates through the cosmos, the big bang happened on every day of the year simultaneously.

      This may sound like a complete tangent, but this kind of spacetime disaster stretching into opaque infinities is exactly how making comics works.

  12. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    January 17, 2025 at 12:10 am | #

    Since Shortpacked! ended (not counting sporadic april fools strips) on its tenth anniversary and today is its twentieth, that means it’s now been dead for as long as it was alive. Have fun with the existential despair!

    …oh no sonic has breached the comic, now DoA fanart is gonna go from 99% inflation fetish art to 99.9%

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      January 17, 2025 at 12:25 am | #

      wait what?????????

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      January 17, 2025 at 2:02 am | #

      … pure hypothetical, how much would fan games account for percentage-wise in that metric?

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        January 17, 2025 at 3:16 am | #

        Colored-pencil drawings on DeviantArt make up the lion’s share of that figure.

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          January 17, 2025 at 3:26 am | #

          it’s funny how “lion’s share” has come to mean the majority of something

          however, apex predators like lions being at the highest trophic level in their ecosystem means that of all life-forms therein they in fact have the least amount of energy available to them in the form of food

          • eh, whatever
            eh, whatever
            January 17, 2025 at 7:09 am | #

            The expression comes from one particular fable where different animals hunt together and the lion successfully intimidates the others to get the lion’s share.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              January 17, 2025 at 3:31 pm | #

              Yeah, even in ecology it could be seen as top predators like lions getting the first share of a kill before leaving it to scavengers like hyenas and vultures.

              • NGPZ
                NGPZ
                January 17, 2025 at 6:02 pm | #

                the kill… of fauna, which lions are limited to on account of being obligate carnivores

                their prey has much more energy available to them in the form of flora, not to mention flora themselves have the majority of energy available of all lifeforms in the ecosystem in the form of soil nutrients and of course light from our sun XD

          • Michael Steamweed
            Michael Steamweed
            January 17, 2025 at 8:23 am | #

            Eh, patriarchy likes to mess that up, just like the “alpha male” thing.

  13. Chaucer59
    Chaucer59
    January 17, 2025 at 12:11 am | #

    Happy 20th, old man.

  14. True Survivor
    True Survivor
    January 17, 2025 at 12:18 am | #

    Here Amber reminds me of many species of the beloved and graceful goby. A tranquil, noble fish, that spends all day within its traditional burrow side by side with her man (man-fish?), gazing upon the distant heavens with big old-fish eyes and a slight resting frown. Later it will venture forth to devour the weak or explode into terrible violence when somebody trespasses in its domain.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      January 17, 2025 at 12:40 am | #

      If you throw one of those fish, is it considered rude to shout “Goby”?

  15. bwooom
    bwooom
    January 17, 2025 at 12:19 am | #

    can we get a character tag for sonic

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      January 17, 2025 at 12:33 am | #

      Only if Mando gets one.

      • Michael Steamweed
        Michael Steamweed
        January 17, 2025 at 8:25 am | #

        Let’s not forget ol’ Raph!

  16. Bryy
    Bryy
    January 17, 2025 at 12:25 am | #

    HAPPY 20th, SHORTPACKED!

  17. P!enapple
    P!enapple
    January 17, 2025 at 12:26 am | #

    Congrats on 20 years! That is amazing!

  18. Claire
    Claire
    January 17, 2025 at 12:26 am | #

    Happy 20th Anniversary Shortpacked! (Wild )

  19. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    January 17, 2025 at 12:31 am | #

    Watch over these idiots, Mando.

  20. EpochFlame
    EpochFlame
    January 17, 2025 at 12:33 am | #

    happy 30th to shortpacked

    • EpochFlame
      EpochFlame
      January 17, 2025 at 12:33 am | #

      sorry, 20th

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      January 17, 2025 at 8:26 am | #

      You come to us from Teh Future! [tm]

      How are things in 2035? (i’m a-go out onna limb and say ‘not so great’)

  21. Dara
    Dara
    January 17, 2025 at 12:44 am | #

    Hey Willis!

    I’ve been getting feedback from people I know on and have written up a new, 100% technology-words-free guide for BlueSky users, showing them how to give permission for Mastodon users to follow their accounts.

    They’re telling me this version is much better:

    https://solarbird.net/blog/2025/01/16/hey-bluesky-users/

    Basically, it takes two clicks to give us permission to follow your BlueSky account, and it doesn’t involve interacting with anything other than BlueSky.

    I followed you back on Twitter before I bailed because Musk made his intentions clear, and it’d be nice if I could follow you again now that you’re out. I hope you’re willing to consider it.

    (I don’t intend to keep bringing this back up – it’s just that my first how-to on this was apparently more complicated than I realised, thanks to user interface decisions by BlueSky that makes things like “find accounts by account name” more difficult than one might expect. So now that I wrote this new two-click guide, I figured I’d try again. And oh, yeah – happy 20th for Shortpacked! the first comic of yours I found. ^_^ )

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      January 17, 2025 at 1:54 am | #

      well hot damn imma a queer-ass indie dev so i hella doin this

      the more decentralized social media is, the better ✊🏽

      • Dara
        Dara
        January 17, 2025 at 3:41 am | #

        Oh, are you on BSky? Nice.

        For people on Mastodon, Federated WordPress, Pixelfed, and so on, I have different instructions. It’s the same idea tho’:

        Follow the special account @bsky.brid.gy@bsky.brid.gy

        If you don’t know how to do that: copy @bsky.brid.gy@bsky.brid.gy into the search box, hit enter. The profile will come up; click “follow.”

        Done. ^_^

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      January 17, 2025 at 3:18 am | #

      Great, we’ve reinvented FidoNet.

      • Dara
        Dara
        January 17, 2025 at 3:37 am | #

        Not really; I mean, this connection is a little Fido-like, but the Federation is point-to-point like the web or email (as opposed to store-and-forward like Fido), and BlueSky is … basically centralised. It can theoretically be more distributed and maybe at some point it will be; people are trying.

        Anyway, the intent is “make something a billionaire can’t buy and turn into a fascist propaganda and disinformation fountain like Elon Musk did with X.” Mastodon isn’t like that at all, and won’t ever be; BlueSky… could be like that, even if it’s not like that yet. And hopefully it will be.

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          January 17, 2025 at 3:44 am | #

          Bluesky is thankfully open source

          meaning that if some asswad billionaire “buys it”, literally anyone in the world can take the source and use it to spring up their own copy and we all just go there XD

          SquidwardAlarmClockCloset.gif

          • Dara
            Dara
            January 17, 2025 at 4:27 am | #

            It is, except.

            There are three things which are currently super-centralised. One is identity. Yes, you could clone it, but switching millions of people onto a new identity handler is… not easy.

            Two is search, but that’s basically tied to your Relay; changing Relay will change your search, so that should be okay, once you have the new Relay up.

            The new Relay is… hoo boy.

            There have been a lot of discussions about how much it’d take to run a new, full Relay. Not the little partials and test Relays that have gone up, but a real, full one.

            One attempt to number this out when BlueSky was a lot smaller was $55K or so a year. That’s nontrivial.

            The new organisational attempt to put up a new, full, second Relay – Cory Doctor’s involved, Mozilla is involved, a lot of people are involved – is estimating

            FOUR MILLION DOLLARS

            to get it up and running.

            That… that’s a lot.

            I mean, that was kind of their plan, right? To make search work better and to preserve timeline order across many users, funnel literally everything through a single pipe (a Relay) for distribution, but allow multiple of those large pipes, each one of which would be very expensive but could be run by different companies and/or organisations. E.g., Cloudflare might run one, Mozilla might run one, etc.

            But you’ve got to have like $4M to start one up, looks like.

            That’s a big barrier to entry.

            Whereas the Federation has no equivalent concept. Every instance does its own delivery, like with email. The timeline order thing, turned out, was not actually a problem; search over here is a lot better than it used to be – a lot better – but yes, BlueSky’s will always be more comprehensive.

            I’m not sure that’s worth the tradeoff, though, not gonna lie.

            I mean, don’t get me wrong: I’m not rooting for BlueSky to fail. I want multiple systems up and running.

            But “open source” – like Mastodon, like Misskey, like PixelFed, like Frendica – isn’t the be-all and end-all.

            Everything that runs on ActivityPub scales well up and down. You can start a fully functioning instance that talks to people for literally zero marginal cost if you have some hardware lying around and unmetered internet with a spare fixed IP. I did it. It cost me zero because I had those things.

            BlueSky seems to scale up well… but it doesn’t scale down well at all.

            $4M to start moving messages if BlueSky gets evil.

            That’s a lot $, and I really hope the BSky userbase never needs it.

            • NGPZ
              NGPZ
              January 17, 2025 at 4:41 am | #

              my two cents:

              1. Be it what could become of BlueSky, or Mastodon’s lack of accessibility to a majority of social media consumers, Tumblr’s censorship policies, etc, as of 2025 there simply is no single “good” social media platform which is going to solve the problems created by what’s become of Twitter. In any case, decentralizing (i.e. NOT having our content creation and activism majorly on a single platform such as what we unwittingly did with Twitter usage) is our best bet.

              2. the sooner we all start working towards democratic socialism, the better @-@

              • Dara
                Dara
                January 17, 2025 at 5:26 am | #

                First, briefly: Mastodon’s onboarding is MUCH easier now. Very much easier, mostly by making “picking a server” an optional activity and defaulting to mastodon.social, the one run by the big nonprofit in Germany.

                That said:

                I think One Big Platform is honestly a bad idea.

                I want many smaller platforms that can talk to each other. I think ActivityPub is better at that than ATProto, but both are trying it and I hope they both work out.

                And I hope everyone doesn’t try to go to One Big Place ever again, because we can see how that’s worked out, and the answer is badly, and I think in large part that it’s just plain a bad idea. Let’s not do that anymore.

                In other words I think we basically agree but I think the whole “one big platform” idea is fundamentally flawed and I kinda get the impression you don’t, it’s merely impractical because billionaires. But I could be wrong.

                As for two, you can be the democratic socialist and I can be the social democrat and we can have very civilised debates in some better version of the world… and I just realised that this separation is almost exactly the same one I’m talking about in my previous paragraph, which is hilarious to me. Wow. Amazing xD

                • Michael Steamweed
                  Michael Steamweed
                  January 17, 2025 at 8:31 am | #

                  “[I]mpractical because billionaires” describes too damn much of currently proposed sensible fixes.

                • NGPZ
                  NGPZ
                  January 17, 2025 at 8:32 pm | #

                  re: one big platform and socialism,

                  there are many kinds of socialism, ant not all them necessarily entail 100% centralized command economy if that’s what you mean?

                  if only because socialism is a *goal* without any fixed set of policies to achieve it — specifically, that of seeing to it that the capitalism and it’s resulting social order which results in billionaires being able to vote with their money is abolished entirely

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  January 17, 2025 at 11:13 pm | #

                  Wow. Yeah, that sums up my problem with modern internet socialism pretty accurately. Not only is there no agreed on way to reach the goal, but the goal itself is just “end capitalism”

                  I guess we’ll work something out to take it’s place once that happens? What could possibly go wrong?

                • NGPZ
                  NGPZ
                  January 17, 2025 at 11:47 pm | #

                  one thing’s for sure, we can expect things to go very wrong should the late capitalist social order which is basically feudalism with a 21st century coat of paint is allowed to continue where it’s going 0-0

                  heck, as Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. pointed out, the United States is a mixed economy of “socialism for the rich and the white, rustic free market capitalism for poor and racial minorities”, and was a democratic socialist himself whose views were unfortunately white-washed over time

                • NGPZ
                  NGPZ
                  January 18, 2025 at 12:07 am | #

                  also, @thejeff, socialism has literally always been that way since the beginning

                  in Russia Revolution 1917, there were actually multiple socialist parties at play with varying stances on centralization of the economy, worker cooperatives, the need for violent coercion (with democratic socialists are markedly opposed to), religion, etc.

                  You don’t get to hear much from them because Lenin and the Bolsheviks had all other socialist parties executed in favor of a one-party state, if only because militarism and absolutism have been the norm for Russian politics since at least the days of the Mongolian Empire.

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  January 18, 2025 at 9:31 am | #

                  Fair that it’s always been that way.

                  Good to know that after the glorious communist revolution sweeps the old order into the ashes of history what we have to look forward to is years of open warfare between socialist factions.

              • Mark
                Mark
                January 17, 2025 at 7:23 am | #

                A hollow voice whispers, “usenet.”

                • Michael Steamweed
                  Michael Steamweed
                  January 17, 2025 at 8:34 am | #

                  Ahh, the ancient times. The age before ours. I think Tolkien wrote of such times in his 700,000+ words-long historical documentaries.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  January 17, 2025 at 2:53 pm | #

                  And you thought the original Eternal September was bad…

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  January 17, 2025 at 3:35 pm | #

                  What do you mean “original” Eternal September?

                  It’s still September 1993. September 11462nd, 1993 to be exact.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  January 17, 2025 at 5:34 pm | #

                  The original Eternal September is the one you just described.

                  I’m talking about a theoretical, even worse one when creatures of the modern Internet decide to invade.

        • Mark
          Mark
          January 17, 2025 at 7:17 am | #

          Email is store-and-forward. Take a look at your Received: headers sometime.

          • Dara
            Dara
            January 17, 2025 at 3:41 pm | #

            The ability to load-share and internally-route mail internally within a site or even subroute it to domains from within your domain in a way that happens to involve some store-and-forward type activity does not make the (E)SMTP protocol fundamentally into a store-and-forward system any more than the ability of UUCP to single-hop direct-deliver a message in rare to unique edge cases made it a point-to-point protocol.

            The primary operating mode of SMTP is domain to domain, without having to be routed explicitly through one or more third-party handlers as was done in pre-SMTP days of bang paths and worse. The sender and/or the recipient systems being able to choose to internally bounce a message around a while for co-hosting, load-distribution, filtering, spam-checking, and/or de-payloading purposes does change that fact one whit.

            • Mark
              Mark
              January 17, 2025 at 5:00 pm | #

              That wasn’t my definition of store-and-forward but, okay.

      • StClair
        StClair
        January 17, 2025 at 9:34 pm | #

        again: “Time is a flat circle.” :p

  22. anon
    anon
    January 17, 2025 at 12:55 am | #

    i mean other than the convenience of ordering online i’m sure some places would be accomadating enough to order it for that store specifically too and have it on hold for you unless it has to be a specific comic book shop as opposed to target which is more for like groceries/a general store lol

    And , ‘official’ merch aside supporting the franchises and such i’m sure there are ppl in the community making good quality stuff tho stuff like full on figures and plushies arent’ as common as like, a keychain or so. (wonder if ‘garagekits’ would exist, i know therea re some for some ‘anime’ and vocaloid charas)

    • Dara
      Dara
      January 17, 2025 at 1:06 am | #

      Honestly I’m pretty fucking sick of, say, Amazon’s bullshit. I would really like to be able to get things like computer parts and 3D printing supplies and locally, while at a still-reasonable price.

      But now, Fry’s moved up here, drove all the locals out of business, then enshittified itself and closed and now we’re just SOL and I’m just hoping that sooner or later we get a Micro Centre or something. Sure, BestBuy has some stuff, but they’re bad at everything and the price different is not 10-20%, which I’d pay in a heartbeat, but like 40-80% and that’s insulting.

      So please keep going in and looking at stuff occasionally, Ethan. Maybe you’ll get lucky. And maybe the store will stay alive.

      • Jess
        Jess
        January 17, 2025 at 4:03 am | #

        Have you tried the thing on Etsy that lets you cut/extrude plastic pop bottles into filament? I could see that being a cheaper alternative. You’d be limited to clear, brown, or green depending on your pop of choice, but it’d be something.

        • Dara
          Dara
          January 17, 2025 at 3:51 pm | #

          I follow those projects – there have been a few, and they’re neat! I might play with it someday.

          But for my day-to-day operations I want plant-derived filaments like PLA and PHA, partly because of the lower toxicity, but mostly because these plastics are medium-term carbon stores. All the carbon in the base filament material comes from plants, and those plants got it from carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. 1kg of PLA filament is like 2.7kg of carbon dioxide removed from the air, which is pretty neat.

          And the current state of PLA is genuinely pretty good. Much better than it was when I got into this a few years ago.

          (I just wish the original filaments.ca hadn’t gone away. They had a custom PHA which was a huge advancement in PHA, and I wish I’d been able to grab some extra rolls before they went under. The people who bought them haven’t revived that line and I don’t know that they will.)

      • anon
        anon
        January 17, 2025 at 6:15 pm | #

        oof the fry’s near my neighborhood shut down, which is a shame, other than some pokemon games/plushies i think i spent more on their inner cafe or so while my dad browsed the electronics , but yeah would be nice if stores were more reasonable

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      January 17, 2025 at 3:20 am | #

      Nobody really does layaway or rain checks anymore, but you can order things online and have them shipped to the store for pick-up. You usually don’t pay shipping that way, either.

  23. nobodybasically
    nobodybasically
    January 17, 2025 at 1:07 am | #

    Does Ethan not know about Amazi-Girl being a distinct personality from Amber? Alternately, does anyone know and I’m just misremembering her friends knowing?

    • Dara
      Dara
      January 17, 2025 at 3:43 am | #

      Ethan knows to some degree – they had a big blowup about it over Mike at the hospital. I don’t know that he understands really, though – and that’s a very different thing.

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      January 17, 2025 at 7:29 am | #

      I think he’s using “being Amazi-Girl” to mean “running around in a mask getting into fights”, which is something Amazi-Girl, the alter, had largely stopped doing in favour of roller derby.

  24. Ray Radlein
    Ray Radlein
    January 17, 2025 at 1:45 am | #

    “And the artist is drawing us in a toy store”

    “Some habits die hard”

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      January 17, 2025 at 7:47 am | #

      Technically, this is a Target, and a poorly stocked one at that.

      • Charles Phipps
        Charles Phipps
        January 17, 2025 at 8:26 am | #

        Alas toy stores no longer exist.

        Like malls or bees.

        https://www.shortpacked.com/comic/it39s-the-biggest-toy-store-there-was

  25. saltchocolate
    saltchocolate
    January 17, 2025 at 1:46 am | #

    Shortpacked forever!!!

  26. Wereg
    Wereg
    January 17, 2025 at 1:47 am | #

    Can’t two girls sharing a meatsack have hobbies?

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      January 17, 2025 at 8:37 am | #

      It’s bonding time. A way to develop friendship.

  27. apricot
    apricot
    January 17, 2025 at 1:53 am | #

    Happy anniversary, Shortpacked! This strip really brings the nostalgia.

  28. Suet
    Suet
    January 17, 2025 at 2:47 am | #

    You can blame Amber’s habit on roller derby. You can blame Ethan’s habit on… going outside?

    Nothing beats the instant gratification in a physical store. Some habits die harder.

  29. Acher4
    Acher4
    January 17, 2025 at 3:09 am | #

    I love when Willis works the updates and manages to update in anniversaries!

    Happy 20th Anniversary!!!

    And for those that were there back then.
    Damn… we are old…. <.<
    *hugs*

  30. Kyulen
    Kyulen
    January 17, 2025 at 3:15 am | #

    Sonic is either staring at Ethan’s butt, or trying to see in his pockets.

    • Proxiehunter
      Proxiehunter
      January 17, 2025 at 4:20 am | #

      Trying to see if his pockets are full of butt.

      • NGPZ
        NGPZ
        January 17, 2025 at 5:10 am | #

        he’s looking for a monster that can fit in his pocket

    • Jesse
      Jesse
      January 17, 2025 at 6:33 am | #

      There’s a higher-than-zero chance that Sonic x Ethan fan art already exists.

    • Da Boy
      Da Boy
      January 17, 2025 at 10:36 am | #

      Checking for the Rings

  31. darkoneko
    darkoneko
    January 17, 2025 at 4:59 am | #

    that they do

  32. Jesse
    Jesse
    January 17, 2025 at 6:30 am | #

    If Ethan is a Batman fan in a comic where people don’t age, does that make Shortpacked’s Ethan comparable to The Dark Knight Returns’ Batman? I’d read a revival where he goes back to the toy store and fights the newest manchild customer in the mud.

  33. Mark
    Mark
    January 17, 2025 at 7:28 am | #

    The One Where Everybody Returns?

  34. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    January 17, 2025 at 8:22 am | #

    I am glad Elon Musk didn’t buy Hasbro because the thought of him owning Transformers would like someone kidnapping Willis/Ethan’s kids and sending him photos.

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      January 17, 2025 at 8:39 am | #

      Oh gods above and below, I hope he never ever learns about rpgs and wants to buy Hasbro and pull his billionaire-bullshit on D&D or ttrpgs in general.

      Fortunately, the potential for techbro profits just seems too unlikely.

      • Charles Phipps
        Charles Phipps
        January 17, 2025 at 8:40 am | #

        Oh he threatened to do it to D&D but then forgot about it. Thank Paladine.

  35. Amós Batista
    Amós Batista
    January 17, 2025 at 8:32 am | #

    2nd panel: I rather going to see in place than buying on-line.

    • Michael Steamweed
      Michael Steamweed
      January 17, 2025 at 8:40 am | #

      That’s me with bookstores.

  36. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    January 17, 2025 at 8:42 am | #

    It’s kind of fascinating to realize that it was Ethan’s Dad who was a G1 Transformers fan now. Ethan would have grown up with an entirely different one.

  37. Caro
    Caro
    January 17, 2025 at 10:47 am | #

    In her defense, Paul started it

  38. Yakumo
    Yakumo
    January 17, 2025 at 1:20 pm | #

    So it was 20 years ago, today, David Willis started a comic aboutGalasslorunningashopfortoysthatweren’tforplay!(their collectors’ items!).

    Or something like that. Too Boomer?

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      January 17, 2025 at 2:12 pm | #

      Is this from an old TV show?

      • Mark
        Mark
        January 17, 2025 at 5:08 pm | #

        The Beatles: Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. Album and first selection.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          January 17, 2025 at 9:19 pm | #

          That’s not an old TV show, you burglar of virtue, it’s a musical album.

  39. Big Steve
    Big Steve
    January 18, 2025 at 5:44 pm | #

    I love DOA, but I do have great nostalgia for the days of ShortPacked and those big-box toy stores that spawned it. Sigh. Good times. Need a KB Toy fix now. Dammit.

CHOOSE A SIDE, NO COWARDS

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May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

David M Willis! avatar
David M Willis!
@damnyouwillis.bsky.social
reposted by David M Willis!
zaratustra.bsky.social's user avatar
zaratustra @zaratustra.bsky.social ⋅ 2h
@damnyouwillis.bsky.social adjacent to your interests
adashtra.bsky.social's user avatarAsh Parrish @adashtra.bsky.social ⋅ 5h
Turns out the guy was Chuck Ayers, a nationally recognized cartoonist and creator of Crankshaft. He had a lot to say but the thing that struck me was that when he talked about whats going on now, I could see he was holding back emotion. All this still hurts him to see 55 (!!) years later.
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Katie @katiestp.bsky.social ⋅ 5h
Right now, these sweet kids have no clue how impactful this period in history will be for them, but I hope they will be proud of the time they made the best protest sign ever: The green one that says “Trump eats boogers” #NoKings
Kids and adults standing on a pedestrian bridge over the highway with protest signs that say fascists out and no Trump no ice. The best one is green and says Trump eats boogers.
katiestp.bsky.social's user avatarKatie @katiestp.bsky.social ⋅ 10h
We can’t make the actual event at the capitol today, so you’ll find us with the kids on University with our signs (and I might bring the megaphone too). Even if you can’t make it to the capitol - come out in your own neighborhoods, even if it’s for a few minutes. Be seen. Be heard. #nokings
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Anguirus @anguirus.bsky.social ⋅ 6h
rude of you to call me out like this @damnyouwillis.bsky.social
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 10h
www.ebay.com/itm/23614371... five hours left on this weirdo in the box weirdo not in the box is not for sale
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Charlie Jane "Lessons in Magic and Disaster" Anders 🏳️‍⚧ @charliejane.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
At Comic-Con 2009 I was getting misgendered a fair bit and feeling anxious AF about it. Robert Downey Jr. was doing a press conf for Sherlock Holmes. I wanted to shout out a question but hated drawing attn to myself. I did it anyway. He gestured at me: "the lady in the blue shirt." I was so happy.
bolt451.bsky.social's user avatarHunter S Schafer @bolt451.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Right folks. Feeling rather down at the moment so bringing back an oldie Please Quote this with your most minor celebrity interaction
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 19h
dawn these are not the same things you had an abusive boyfriend wilbur had a live-in sex stranger who he chose over your safety because he was getting laid, until the moment something almost happened to HIS GOLDFISH
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 20h
Dumbing of Age: "Counter-protest" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
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Counter-protest
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 21h
(June 19, 2026)
It's Joyce!  Directing our attention leftwards!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
yeah maybe joyce switching to paramore from dc talk last storyline was a good move variety.com/2025/music/n...
header image - Hayley Williams Hopes Christian Music Industry ‘Crumbles’ Amid Michael Tait Scandal: ‘F— All of You Who Knew and Didn’t Say Anything’
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Hayley Williams Hopes Christian Music Industry ‘Crumbles’ Amid Michael Tait Scandal: ‘F— All of You Who Knew and Didn’t Say Anything’
Paramore singer Hayley Williams has reacted angrily to news of accusations against Christian music star Michael Tait, saying, 'I hope the CCM industry crumbles.'
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DaisyFM ✒︎ @daisyfm.net ⋅ 1d
I think it's been long enough that we should all be able to agree that Charles Martinet sounds nothing like what Mario is supposed to sound like.
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david malki ! 🔩 New game! BOLTED 🔩 @davidmalki.com ⋅ 1d
The universe told me "Stop obsessively collecting 19th century illustrations. Here. Now you have plenty. You are done now. Go do the second half of your deal, where you make more things out of them"
video thumbnail
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Wack'd @wackd.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
oh this is a hot take and i'm extremely here for it
daisyfm.net's user avatarDaisyFM ✒︎ @daisyfm.net ⋅ 1d
I think it's been long enough that we should all be able to agree that Charles Martinet sounds nothing like what Mario is supposed to sound like.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
www.ebay.com/itm/23614976... bid on my HFTD Leader Class Starscream!
header image - Transformers Hunt for the Decepticons Leader Class ROTF Starscream, complete 653569490937| eBay
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Transformers Hunt for the Decepticons Leader Class ROTF Starscream, complete 653569490937| eBay
Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Transformers Hunt for the Decepticons Leader Class ROTF Starscream, complete at the best online prices at eBay! Free shipping for many pro...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!!!!!1
preternia.com's user avatarpreternia @preternia.com ⋅ 1d
Lava surfing action!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
that's not why i go to taco bell, taco bell
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
www.ebay.com/itm/23614937... selling my dotm voyager megatron $15 BIN, just to get it outta here
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Tea Berry-Blue @teaberryblue.net ⋅ 1d
Okay so people apparently love this one so I’ll tell it again: I was walking down the street in Hell’s Kitchen back when Daniel Radcliffe was performing in Equus on Broadway, when I see him on the street. The thing is, I recognize him, remember his name is Dan, COMPLETELY blank on why I know him.
bolt451.bsky.social's user avatarHunter S Schafer @bolt451.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Right folks. Feeling rather down at the moment so bringing back an oldie Please Quote this with your most minor celebrity interaction
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
today in #9chickweedlane i learned that by god we are going to rewrite and rewrite and rewrite amos/edda's courtship until they are holding each others' hands directly out of their respective wombs
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Tyler, from the Internet @tylerjameshill.com ⋅ 2d
Republicans: WE NOMINATE SKELETOR Democrats: We dislike Skeletor but we will vote to confirm him. Please give us between 5 and 50 dollars. Democrats: I stand before you to condemn the actions of Skeletor. He should have never been given this power. Please give me between 5 and 50 dollars.
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Shen Comix @shenanigansen.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
01: Shen is happily showing a dark brown haired guy a comic that he's holding in his hands. He says
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
crankshaft doing important public work showing us how staff picks happen, blowing this nepotistic corruption right the fuck open
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
"...fuck no"
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Remake" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
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Remake
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 5d
www.makeship.com/petitions/tr... Wanna Tricerahoodie Dina plush? GO PLEDGE FOR ONE! We need 200 people to make it happen! Pledge period will end in 10 days!
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Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
Dina is so small and quiet that she goes completely unnoticed by most people for long stretches of time. She doesn’t talk much — she prefers to observe. People and how they interact is a puzzle to Din...
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Mel Brooks @officialmelbrooks.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I told you we’d be back
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
"Remember when we could only use cash in the vending machines?" "Yeah, how primitive, ha ha! ... and imagine being older than every candy bar brand in this thing! I mean, I'm young, like you."
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
sophianyx.bsky.social's user avatarSophia_Nyx 🏳️‍⚧️ @sophianyx.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Without saying Terminator 2, fav Arnold Schwarzenegger Film?
older white guy in a grey suit rests a hand on his chin wearing a big gold watch short brown hair. hot.
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🎄 Barb O. Saur 🎄🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 @brentosaur.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Happy Pride/Wrath month, post your favorite LGBTQIA+ character.
Cover for the Unstoppable Gwenpool.
onua-ryder.neocities.org's user avatar💎Onyx | 🐉Emerald | 💀Obsidian 🏳️‍⚧️ 🔞 @onua-ryder.neocities.org ⋅ 3d
Happy Pride/Wrath month, post your favorite LGBTQIA+ character
Kamen Rider Bravo in full spiky green and silver armor.
Oren Pierre Alfonzo, who wears the Bravo armor, looking femme AF.
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Barred and Boujee and NEWLYWED aka Madiba Dennie @audrelawdamercy.bsky.social ⋅ 4m
Need a white guy to walk confidently into a federal building and delete all the student loans files
bencollins.bsky.social's user avatarTim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social ⋅ 4m
So you can just say you work at DOGE and pillage anything from our documents you want. The law truly doesn't exist anymore! Cool!
header image - 3 men claiming to be from DOGE show up at San Francisco City Hall, demand records
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3 men claiming to be from DOGE show up at San Francisco City Hall, demand records
San Francisco city officials are investigating after three men who claimed to be from the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) showed up at City Hall on Friday demanding records from offices bef...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
www.ebay.com/itm/23614109... One hour left for these two
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