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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 13h
The Emotion Engine @emotion-engine.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
The Emotion Engine @emotion-engine.bsky.social ⋅ 13d
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| TEAM FOSSILS
Rainbow Friends
Dr. Frizzle
hi Dotty !
Me: “How can people not touch their toes?? Lemme demonstrate”
*creaks in Old Person*
Me: “…n/m”
And what’s with the straight back?!? That defeats at least half the purpose.
I could barely wave at my toes yesterday. Today, touching the floor. Tomorrow, who knows. The Olds is no fun.
you want a straight back because you want to be moving your torso at the hips, not your spine for that stretch. It’s much like the “lift with your legs, not your back” mantra.
Fun fact: I have been hearing that mantra all my life. Every time I had to lift something heavy as a kid, someone would say “Remember, lift with your legs, not your back!” and I would have no idea what they were talking about, because I was lifting with my arms. But they’d say it so authoratively that I wouldn’t want to question it, so I just nodded.
Then, in I think my late 20s, I got a warehousing job. And naturally, we had to do was watch a health and safety video on Correct Lifting Technique. And this actually said “If you stoop over to lift something,you’re putting too much strain in the wrong places, you should bend your knees instead.” And I was like “Ohh, that makes sense. Is that what people meant the whole time?”
Yeah I worked briefly at lowes and we had a video that did the same and I had a similar moment. I’m pretty sure people just you know heard the thing and then parroted the thing, but had no concept of the thing because they were all lifting wrong as well.
I worked in the back room at the post office for a while. Not only did I get similar training, I worked in the same area with a guy who had lifted something wrong (at least) once and had to have his spine pinned. I still remember that lesson!
The wording never made sense to me either until I was shown! But my thinking was “How can you not be lifing with your legs? They hold everything up!” lol
It’s also not always true. If something is light enough, you should lift with your back for the exercise.
And now after decades of that advice knee injuries are rampant. Heavy lifting is a strain no matter how it’s done. Now some factories are working on equipment so no bending or crouching is required.
I’m 32 and heavily out of shape.
I can still touch my knuckles to the floor with both my back and knees straight.
I am apparently 39 and am definitely out of shape. I am also hypermobile and can do this easily… Can also put my hands down flat on the ground with straight knees and presumably back. Am assuming that the hypermobility is my secret advantage here.
I am… more than that =| and whatever I used to be able to do, I can’t anymore T_T
*plays “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails on hacked muzak*
I like that you give fun song suggestions, but I looked up this song and SWEET JESUS that is a disturbing music video. I thought the flipped over roach was a maybe little cruel and strange for a music video for a song just about sex but, I was able to just brush it off as a weird minor one off thing for the sake of art. Then they started crucifying a monkey and defiling a pig’s corpse and now I am wondering who the hell directed this thing.
Reznor designed the video himself.
Heh I never saw the music video, and wow
Yeah as I understand it NIN kinda blew up in some circles because of a video made for the Broken EP that was never officially released, Trent had second thoughts about it and only gave a few copies to friends, but copies were made of those copies and urban legends spread and the copies only got degraded and fuzzier as they were copied and watched again and again, going viral but only among people who had heard how fucked up it was and wanted to see it for themselves, separated only by the recording artifacts from something that felt so *real*.
So I expect that Closer was an attempt to recapture some of that magic, and it *was* played on MTV a lot, but heavily censored.
If you have problems with NIN’s video I could suggest Halocene’s cover instead.
It’s a very different vibe to the song called “Closer” that I’m more familiar with.
There are entirely too many songs called “Closer”
To confuse things further, some of those songs should be, like, a break-up song about having a blazing row, but you’ve got the argument that will shut your ex’s down completely. That’s the closer.
(I really don’t have the energy to check if any of them are.)
The video for that Lemaitre song is seriously Foxtrot Uniform.
Thing is, it’s not actually “a song just about sex”. Wikipedia summarises: “Lyrically, “Closer” is a song about self-hatred and obsession; to Reznor’s dismay, the song was widely misinterpreted as a lust anthem due to its chorus”.
I love the post modern jukebox cover. (Also the same guy— Kenton Chen) covers another song called Closer and I would so buy an album of him covering lots of different Closer songs.)
Crucifying the monkey is unlikely, given that known animal activist Nivek Ogre was one of his early models…
They didn’t hurt it, It was just tied to a cross, but not like hung up or anything.
Exactly.
I haven’t been able to touch my toes bending over in at least a decade, I think.
saame
lol well, as long as you can bend down good enough to tie ur shoes hopefully it should be fine
Even when I was a kid I couldn’t do it.
Raise your hand if you just stood up and tried it yourself.
Never been able to. My mother’s side of the family has long legs and short arms, so it’s a consistent problem on that side.
I haven’t been able to do it since my age hit the double digits.
Bisexual vibes off the charts.
The poly here.
This would be a hella cute poly relationship.
Dotty: “This is my girlfriend
and her boyfriend >:|”
Or Hetroflexiable or Saiposexual.
Yes that seems to be Joyce’s case, she wants to F*ck their minds, in a nice loving way.
Yeah seriously relating to Joyce here (in both a thirsty and poly way): everyone is so hot and i also like them all as people oh no halp
This is weird
Oh my yes.
This is when we discover this is the first time Joyce has bent over in her entire life.
I admit, I can touch my toes, but it hurts to do so. Still I try to do so every day when I stretch.
Just don’t expect me to be very stretchy. Anyone here particularly flexible?
Weirdly despite being a very tall, overweight, 30 yr old dude I’m very flexible. My doctor is always surprised how easily I can bend over or frog sit. In my younger days I could even do the splits.
Frog sitting is manageable, so long as I’m not expected to stand back up. It’s a one way trip.
I can put my entire hands on the floor.
I can, however, not stand with straight legs and also have my spine be in the shape it’s supposed to have – nope, my lower spine bends way forward.
So… Yesn’t? Only flexible in relatively useless ways XD
That’s primarily a back stretch for me. Straight back does not compute.
I can still touch my toes, and I turn 40 next year. I was the kid who got excited when they pulled out that board to measure how far you could reach for the fitness test, because that was the one thing I was good at in gym class.
I’m just bendy enough to be fun, but not bendy enough to be worried about joint hypermobility.
I’m flexible in weird ways. Not gym-type stretching flexible (much less yoga), but I can, say, be carrying a full armload of stuff out to the garage from the house, and then reach up with my foot to grip the door handle with my toes, open the door, and pull it towards me with my toes, all without ever being at risk of losing balance.
…. but also if just stand up or turn around wrong I can spontaneously halfway dislocate one or both of my shoulders. I don’t know if that counts as being too flexible or not flexible enough, but it sucks either way.
sounds like hypermobility, yeah. https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/what-is-hsd/ diagnosis is still kinda problematic (or if you’re canadian, impossible/useless) but if you find other people online you can learn stuff that might help. Muldowney protocol is a good place to start for keeping your shoulders in.
(also, PSA: losing the flexibility doesn’t mean you’ve lost the hypermobility disorder, especially if you lost it because your muscles are so damn tight they’re causing other problems)
just flexible enough for my body to completely fall apart when I was 29ish
hypermobility disorders suck. gabapentin has helped, though (that and finally un-dislocating my own neck after 7ish years of doing other joints myself and searching in vain for a physiotherapist/chiropractor/anyone who could actually help)
…Muldowney helped too, but I’ve been avoiding getting back to it because it’s tedious as fuck, and I’m doing well enough to get away with avoiding things
In my teens I could scratch my ears with either foot, back when Gerald Ford was president. In 2011 I was doing yoga and fell out of a pose and stuck my right foot in my ear and pulled some ligaments. That hip has hurt ever since.
Didn’t she just do some backflips off panel several strips ago?
How is she so inflexible now?
Uhhh, what backflip? You sure we are talking about the same Joyce?
well she did ‘teleport’ up a tree. maybe her abilities are comedy based lol
That, plus some panic-fueled adrenaline.
Never mind.
That strip said “slipping away”.
For days I’ve thought it said “backflipping away” and wondered why she was THAT excited.
That was Soggy Cardboard. Different comic.
No it wasn’t.
I don’t read any other comics.
I don’t even know what that is.
I just misread the strip when Joyce left Sarah in mid monologue to talk to Jacob.
I can’t touch my toes, but I also do not give a shit about that.
Now, I guess we get to see how homoerotic this all winds up getting. My guess is, quite.
If Joyce comes out as bisexual, Becky might explode… Actually I’d love to see that; whenever she is comfortable to announce it of course.
This was not supposed to be a reply, sorry. ._.”
I mean, it’s fine, it went along with the homoeroticism mention, so if you hadn’t said anything, I’d have thought nothing of it, honestly!
My read on Becky’s whole feud with Dorothy has always been that she thinks Joyce feels a way about Dorothy that she’ll never feel about Becky despite how much Becky wanted her too.
I’m not sure how she’d react to that being confirmed.
Becky has Dina now, she’s (almost) over Joyce.
damn she’s just like me forreal
CALLED IT
Are you a steak? Because that was very well done.
I guess the real exercise of the day is Tug of War.
Also, Is Dorothy wearing a cape?
no, that’s the bottom of a jacket
–Dave, probably a colorblocked one, white arms/collar/yoke, yellow bottom
You could say she’s PAST tense. Or at least she was.
dorothy could give her a massage later ;P
(Tho other than helping other ppl before i’m surprised you coudl tell if someone’s body feels tense just by touching)
Got it
Dorothy getting gayer every time she appears on screen, I’m so here for it.
I think Dorothy’s gayness is accidental, and she is in fact straight. However Joyce is an entirely different situation, where she may be suppressing her gayness, if any.
Or she is bisexual or heteoflexiable
I don’t know, she seems to be struggling with flexibility here.
Oops… Just realised I put this reply on the wrong comment.
Dorothy’s the one making the moves here.
I would have agreed with this a year ago, but I’m increasingly less certain of that assessment
Dotty’s Mind: “Hm. I can’t tell Joyce not to date Joe. That would violate trust and free will and such. Hm. I know. I will begin an increasingly campaign of slow seduction, starting with dryer masturbation, escalating with sexy back massage, and ending when Joyce realizes it’s me she wants and abandoning Joe for me.”
Crap… I participled my verb list. Don’t know what I was thinking.
Relax, it was grammatic enough to comprehend.
Are we also including her outfit today?
bisexual joyce is killing me, she deserves to be with both dorothy AND joe
Spit roast her
Surprisingly, despite always being big, and even becoming fat enough to be morbidly obese for many years, I have always been able to touch my toes, so I can’t really relate to this minor struggle.
i imagine it’d be hard if you do the back test trying to touch your arms/fingers together, tho i only ever had to do that once for gym
I’m not sure what that is.
But I’m sure I can’t do it now.
I have arthritis in both shoulders and additional clavicle trouble in the left one which reduces my range of motion.
https://www.topendsports.com/testing/images/back-scratch2.jpg dunno if it had a name but it’s this one lol
But other than an itch on ur back or showering (tho most ppl i’d assume would use a scrubber if they need it) hopefully you wouldn’t ‘need’ to lol
I’ve always been in the normal BMI category (even was in the lighter end of normal when I was younger) and yet I’ve never been able to touch my toes I think the amount of walking/biking/running I do counteracts what little amount of stretching I do.
I tense up when people invite themselves to touch me too.
Well, Dorothy did ask. She just failed to be clear what she meant. In military contexts we’s straight up ask “permission to touch?” when helping each other for inspections.
so she didn’t actually ask.
On the belly, no less! *flinch*
Surprised Dorothy isn’t slutting it up like Joe is with the workout attire. Sarah’s arguably doing the same. Didn’t she read the memo that they’re not actually here to workout but seduce objects of affection with their bodies?
I dunno she’s showing off the freckles at least.
i mean other than it being a sports bra/showing off midriff, i think it’d be around the same level since they’re both workout outfits, but maybe dorothy will take her jacket off (that said even in summer i disliek showing off my midriff,even if i had a more slender body i’drather wear a tanktop lol)
aaaaaaaaaand there it is
Now you’re just being mean on purpose what’s next a conveniently placed vat of pudding https://www.shortpacked.com/comic/pudding
Somehow I don’t think Dorothy is the best person to help Joyce be straight.
This made me laugh, thank you. That was a great way to close the day.
They’ll remember this at an hilariously inappropriate moment some six or seven years from now and it will absolutely wreck the tension but they’ll decide it was worth it.
Hah, swish.
**rimshot noise**
the butts disease is acting up again I see
Oh dear. XD This’ll be a fun gym day.
and then they all go to lunch again but hopefully this time will be better lol
Willis knows what he is doing.
Yes. Yes he does. He knows what he did. And he’ll do it again, too.
If it weren’t for us meddling commentators?
Joyce finding out there’s physiological repercussions to being neurotic and anxious all the time!
I remember those times when I was unable to touch my toes.
Now I can touch the floor with my palms. >.>
Panel 2 is the most I have ever related to Joyce.
As if she would bend over in front of Joyce, no siree bob
His keyword here is “try” though, unless you have a mad legs-to-torso ratio.
Confirmed that Joyce is willing to bend over for Joe if he asks.
(Disclaimer: “willing” does not necessarily imply “able”.)
Dotty will one day regret helping her with those exercises XD
Uh-oh, Joyce likes what she sees…
https://www.dumbingofage.com/twohours/
The levels of horny in this room are off the charts and it’s only Partially Joe’s fault XD
Now Joyce must face the challenge of the workout Do(tty)Jo(e)
I’m not liking this storyline: it’s shoving in my face that I should return to gym.
Just can’t be sedentary in peace…
even Joyce’s ponytail is tense
I cannot bend over like that any more without leaning my head against, say, a convenient wall, because I have balance issues these days. but I used to be able to just about touch toes
–Dave, Dina, lurking behind weight machine: *scribbles in notebook about socialization methods*
1. Butt! Face!
2. Knees aren’t straight. Cheating!
To be fair, Joe is clearly not all that flexible himself. Straighten those knees, Mr Stiff-Hams!
Well, he did say TRY to touch your toes, and since we don’t even see how close he gets to succeeding…
Joyce is stuck between Joe’s butt and Dorothy touching her.
THE BI PANIC IS REAL
Has Joyce spent enough time picking up socks, unlike Marigold?
If they’re not gonna make out, I’m not gonna get excited when one of them touches the other.
I’d be down for make-outs too, but the way everyone is leaning into casual touch means they’re about to is weirding me out a bit.
That’s about where I’m at. I get it, exaggerated shipping goggles blah blah blah, but it feels weird.
It’s not like we’re seeing Joyce respond like she did when Joe touched her.
“Joyce stumbles ass-backwards into a bisexual threeway: A Dumbing of Age pornographique.”
I’d sub for it.
I’ll resume my sub for any pornographic Willis put out soon, really
“Now back that ass up and down and get low get low…”
Have to admit I am surprised to see Dorothy here.
I know she works to stay in shape, but I thought her thing was just running, not weight training. (Unless of course she tracked Joyce down there)
It’s the middle of winter.
She may have opted for the treadmill instead of running outside.
…this would be less weird if she were spotting a lesbian who asked her out last Tuesday. And I would say the same if all three were men.
Your HONOR, they are– [shot in the head by a sniper before she can finish the joke]
Imma level with ya, this one is pretty tasteless, but I couldn’t not picture it looking at this strip. Is it SFW? I mean, everyone’s got their clothes on but probably don’t literally treat it as SWF. Lets call it “suggestive”
https://i.imgur.com/4iEKudV.png
My toes and I are in a distant relationship, they won’t let me touch them. BA-DUM-TISH! I’ll be here until next Friday, try your waitress and tip the veal.
also i notice those pupils got REAL big in panel 2
–Dave, see anything you’d like, Joyce?
thinking about this strip for no* reason.
*multiple reasons
There *is* a heterosexual reason for what’s happening here, but it’s pretty flimsy and noone buys it.
no comments on how Joe’s posterior seems to become more defined as Joyce’s eyes dilate, huh