Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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you can see markings on the ground that betray this church auditorium as a former school gymnasium
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May 12, 2026

Kazam

by David M Willis on July 3, 2016 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - It All Returns
└ Tags: becky, hank, joyce, pastor landrum, youth pastor powers

Discussion (431) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    July 3, 2016 at 12:01 am | #

    dang, if I’d have worn those in church

    …I’d’ve been naked, actually, after the “reveal”

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      July 3, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

      also our church had those but because the auditorium doubled as a church gym

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        July 3, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

        (re: alt-text)

      • Thomas O.
        Thomas O.
        July 3, 2016 at 10:31 am | #

        I know of a church in Dallas that converted their sanctuary INTO a gym, after they lost so many members over the years. The smaller chapel they had then became their main sanctuary. Eventually they sold the whole place and moved to another property.

    • 3-I
      3-I
      July 3, 2016 at 2:04 am | #

      Well, that’s one way to stop a church social.

      • Joseph
        Joseph
        July 3, 2016 at 6:11 am | #

        Or start one!

        • GreyDefender
          GreyDefender
          July 3, 2016 at 3:09 pm | #

          I like the way you think

  2. sailorcakes
    sailorcakes
    July 3, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    Good bye dress!!

    • Wheelpath
      Wheelpath
      July 3, 2016 at 12:31 am | #

      Lesbians have magical stripping powers, awesome

      • foamy
        foamy
        July 3, 2016 at 12:39 am | #

        Clearly Becky is the Dovahkiin, complete with the ability to swap full sets of armour in seconds. :v

        • Joe
          Joe
          July 3, 2016 at 2:03 pm | #

          Lesbahiin.

      • nothri
        nothri
        July 3, 2016 at 12:56 am | #

        No! Its not the power of being a lesbian! The power to strip lies in all of us!

      • miados
        miados
        July 3, 2016 at 1:02 am | #

        kill the witch! oh wait…… she’s a red head and super sweet. I will forgive the witch magic if you don’t break my fingers for calling you a witch. is that a deal becky?

      • Harvey Janus
        Harvey Janus
        July 3, 2016 at 1:19 am | #

        I thought their magical stripping powers involved a Sailor Moon transformation.

        • Slartibeast Button, BIA
          Slartibeast Button, BIA
          July 3, 2016 at 11:43 am | #

          Becky rising into the air and changing in a blinding light with implied nudity would cause a lot of comment…

          • Orion Fury
            Orion Fury
            July 3, 2016 at 1:57 pm | #

            [Insert Mildly Offensive Joke Here]

            • Clif
              Clif
              July 4, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

              [Insert offended diatribe here]

              (and you probably didn’t know that diatribes could get offended.)

      • Nightsbridge
        Nightsbridge
        July 3, 2016 at 2:10 am | #

        Amber has something she needs to admit to herself then.

        • Clif
          Clif
          July 4, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

          Amber knows.

      • HoneyThistle
        HoneyThistle
        July 3, 2016 at 12:02 pm | #

        PFffttt….magical stripping powers…yeeeheeheeeheeeeee….

        Dammit, now there’s coffee down my front.

    • TheAnonymousGuy
      TheAnonymousGuy
      July 3, 2016 at 1:00 am | #

      Zordon always said too much pink energy was dangerous.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKxTbjNjf_Y

      • Zamer
        Zamer
        July 3, 2016 at 1:56 pm | #

        Well Kirby and Majin Buu proved him right.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 3, 2016 at 3:37 am | #

      Carol was just going to burn the thing anyway.

  3. Stairmasternem
    Stairmasternem
    July 3, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    This is basically what I do every day when I get home from work.

    • SLICEY
      SLICEY
      July 3, 2016 at 3:04 am | #

      This is what I do every time I go swimming. Except I too am naked…. and i do it because Ari-fucking-zona and once my wet suit is off I’m 99% dry with only wet hair.

      • Stairmasternem
        Stairmasternem
        July 3, 2016 at 6:59 am | #

        Yeah that sounds about right.

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        July 3, 2016 at 10:20 am | #

        Yeah, you dry fast in the Arid Zona.

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 11:16 am | #

          Good grief, the Pun Lord is at large again.

          • ganymedeanoutlaw
            ganymedeanoutlaw
            July 3, 2016 at 11:20 am | #

            Is it really a pun if that’s literally what the name means?

            • David
              David
              July 3, 2016 at 12:01 pm | #

              It enjoys the joke or it gets the link again.

              • ganymedeanoutlaw
                ganymedeanoutlaw
                July 3, 2016 at 8:48 pm | #

                Well that’ll teach me to notice when comments have links in them.

            • PumpkinCake
              PumpkinCake
              July 3, 2016 at 6:33 pm | #

              That’s not actually what the name Arizona means. It’s an O’odham name meaning “small spring’.

              • ganymedeanoutlaw
                ganymedeanoutlaw
                July 3, 2016 at 8:54 pm | #

                Huh. It must be a common mistake since I’ve heard it a lot.

                • SLICEY
                  SLICEY
                  July 3, 2016 at 9:27 pm | #

                  its more of a common joke as Arizona is a dry heat because it is severely arid due to its geographic location in the lee of two mountains (i.e. the rockies and the california mountains) so that even when its monsoon, which it is right now now, its like 0% humity. So Arizona is the Arid Zone but its not were the name is from. BTW i tend to swim at 9pm to 10 pm so that instant drying happens when there is no soon.

                • David Alexander McDonald
                  David Alexander McDonald
                  July 4, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

                  Of course, locals tend to say “It’s a dry heat” mockingly because this happens a lot during Tucson monsoons.

                • maxyai
                  maxyai
                  July 4, 2016 at 9:30 am | #

                  My favorite episode of Wheel of Fortune was when they were in Arizona. the puzzle was mostly solved and the stupid Arizona native said “Bet it’s a dry hoet.” I’m sure they will never live that down.

              • David
                David
                July 4, 2016 at 1:05 am | #

                Are you telling me that “arid zona” is literally a Manitu-damned O’odham pun? Good grief, I am devastated.

  4. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    July 3, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    I don’t think ruining Carol’s clothes will make her see your side any better Becky

    • Boobloobloo
      Boobloobloo
      July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      #notherjob

      • AUnicornNoOneAskedFor
        AUnicornNoOneAskedFor
        July 3, 2016 at 5:17 am | #

        ^ This. It’s not the job of people who don’t fit a societal norm to be perfect little bastions of purity and sweetness. They’re allowed to have their personalities and STILL expect to be treated with the same respect you’d give a (in this case) hetero person because they’re a PERSON. They’re not required to EARN being treated like human beings.

        • Darkoneko
          Darkoneko
          July 3, 2016 at 7:21 am | #

          Not shredding people’s clothes 👚 seems like quite below being a lil bastion of purity.

          But hey, that “shaki~~m” was hilarious.

        • Daisy
          Daisy
          July 3, 2016 at 1:00 pm | #

          This is the entire point of Carla as a trans ace. She’s unapologetic – for everything.

        • ESM
          ESM
          July 3, 2016 at 6:11 pm | #

          I feel like there’s a spectrum between “bastion of purity” and “destroying someone else’s clothes because you don’t like them”.

          Granted, the dress does not actually appear to be harmed, so maybe Becky removed it via magic, in which case that’s fine.

    • T Campbell
      T Campbell
      July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      That boat seems to have already sailed.

      This would have been a more appropriate observation yesterday, but today’s strip kind of seals it: Joyce’s parents’ marriage is in SERIOUS freakin’ trouble, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the divorce gets announced before the end of the volume.

      • Stairmasternem
        Stairmasternem
        July 3, 2016 at 12:21 am | #

        Ehhh I’ve seen my own parents bounce back from worse. I guess in the name of drama this could be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

        • MelanieWaffle
          MelanieWaffle
          July 3, 2016 at 3:35 am | #

          Is your name based off of Fluttershy?

          • Stairmasternem
            Stairmasternem
            July 3, 2016 at 6:41 am | #

            No but it has a weird conception, involving some guy in Canada, Resideng Evil 3, and my younger self having a terrible sense of humor.

            • Flame_Warp
              Flame_Warp
              July 3, 2016 at 9:33 pm | #

              A gist that confusing must be a good story. Elaborate.

              • Stairmasternem
                Stairmasternem
                July 4, 2016 at 4:06 pm | #

                I used Nemesis as an online name for a while. Eventually was informed about Resident Evil 3’s Nemesis who would only say STARS. I started using STAIRS as an odd greeting. Friend called me Stairmasternem once, I loved it and kept it. It’s unique enough that no new accounts typically have it. No numbers in it either, which is a plus for me.

      • TexasDex
        TexasDex
        July 3, 2016 at 12:25 am | #

        I don’t know if I’d go that far, but I think you’re right about the hints. I wouldn’t read too much into the argument Joyce overheard, married people can have disagreements, but Mr. Brown’s comment that “I’d be happier if I were more corrupt or malleable” and his reaction to Joyce’s “What about Mom” in the following strip do suggest that there’s unhealthy friction in the Brown household.

      • Adam Black
        Adam Black
        July 3, 2016 at 1:14 am | #

        T. Cambell, Willis-verse Narrative Expert, endorses my Divorce-Theory!!

        I first called it about 6 months ago when we first saw these preview drawings of Hank.
        And said it again when Joyce was called Home.
        And thought ‘ the Talks’ were going to be the Big D.

        If I’m wrong , at least I’m wrong with you.
        ( You can offer to script it. It would also be cool if Hank was a repressed bisexual, and comes out. )

    • March
      March
      July 3, 2016 at 12:15 am | #

      That dress actually would somehow look more terrible on Carol than it did Becky, so Becky is frankly doing her a favor.

    • JetstreamGW
      JetstreamGW
      July 3, 2016 at 1:11 am | #

      I’ve been kinda assuming that’s Joyce’s dress.

      • JetstreamGW
        JetstreamGW
        July 3, 2016 at 1:11 am | #

        Also it doesn’t look like it was ripped or anything. Maybe Becks is just magic.

        • Darkoneko
          Darkoneko
          July 3, 2016 at 7:22 am | #

          Yes.

          • Cerberus
            Cerberus
            July 3, 2016 at 4:31 pm | #

            God answers lesbian prayers… and grants lesbian superpowers.

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          July 3, 2016 at 2:01 pm | #

          Where have you been? Some distant mining colony?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 3:11 am | #

      Dunno, a lot of her sides are more visible now.

      Specifically the RAD sides.

    • Willoughby Chase
      Willoughby Chase
      July 3, 2016 at 8:50 am | #

      Neither I or Becky give a toss about Carol.

      She’s been demonstrably rebarbative towards Becky, so I don’t see why Becky should go out of her way to appease Carol.

      • David
        David
        July 3, 2016 at 12:25 pm | #

        Because it is not her business to dissolve Joyce’s family. Joyce assured her that she’ll stick with her, so Becky is cementing decisions about Joyce’s life here that are not hers to make. Becky is in her right to care shit-all about Carol. But not in forcing Joyce’s hand. That shows an utter disregard for Joyce and Joyce’s right to make her own decisions regarding her life.

        • Willoughby Chase
          Willoughby Chase
          July 3, 2016 at 12:58 pm | #

          Nah.

          Appeasing Carol is an exercise in pointlessness; Becky wore the dress, and still Carol tried to force her view of christianity on her. Should Becky have appeased her further?

          Hank is cementing those decisions, and that started from the time Joyce went to college and made *her* decisions including that of siding with Becky in spite of Carol.

          Becky is merely the catalyst that set the ball rolling. Could Becky have done differently? Well, I suppose she could stop being gay. Joyce could have stopped being her friend.

          Joyce has agency. Joyce made her decisions, no “forcing” involved.

          • ESM
            ESM
            July 3, 2016 at 6:15 pm | #

            It’s not “appeasement” to not destroy someone else’s property for no reason.

            Should Becky go burn Carol’s house down while she’s in the neighborhood? Why is one okay and not the other? Is it because houses are more expensive than fancy dreseses? Should Becky slash Carol’s tires then? That’s about the same cost.

            But hey, Carol’s a monster, right? She has no rights at all! That’s totally not crazy rapist logic!

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              July 3, 2016 at 7:54 pm | #

              Hyperbole much?

              Becky is the worst ever! She destroyed a dress!

              That she was being forced to wear and that was symbolic of much of the hell she’s had to endure this weekend. But no matter. Just proves how horrible she is.

              If it makes you feel better, you might as well assume it’s magic and the dress is fine, since there’s no way she could actually tear it off like that, with the top and sleeves and belt all intact.
              Or maybe it was just exaggerated for comedic effect? Nah. Willis has never had his characters do anything unrealistic before.

              • ESM
                ESM
                July 3, 2016 at 8:08 pm | #

                I don’t care about Becky or Carol. They’re fictional.

                I care about how the last comic said some people are “monsters” and this comic and its comment section are saying property crimes are laudable because victim’s a “monster”. This is a really dangerous train of thought.

                • Zeriel
                  Zeriel
                  July 3, 2016 at 10:31 pm | #

                  I think honestly the thing that mitigates what you’re getting at (and I do totally agree with you in the sense that “describing actual humans as monsters” is not a good road to be on) is that the dress in particular is something that Becky didn’t particularly choose that’s part and parcel of how people like Carol in general oppress people like Becky in general.

                  It wouldn’t be acceptable at all in that context to burn down Carol’s house or slash her tires, because neither of those things are part of the way Becky is being pushed away from herself. It wouldn’t even be acceptable to destroy a dress that was in Carol’s closet. Only the fact that the dress was forced on Becky in some way renders it acceptable to destroy the dress. (see 15 June 2016’s comic, in which Becky implies (equally unrealistically to the destruction) that Carol literally forced her to wear it via ambush-dressing and outright says she’s uncomfortable.)

                • Adam Black
                  Adam Black
                  July 4, 2016 at 7:57 am | #

                  Becky is being nice!
                  You put a dress on me , against my will: I promise you,
                  there will be a lot more than property crimes.

                  The lesson here is : Keep your hands to yourself, and there won’t be any
                  unwanted problems.

                  But if it helps you ignore your own lack of recognition of personal boundaries,
                  The comment section is just filled with devient property criminals.
                  We probably litter. And Tag businesses with Social Justice Slogans.
                  We know what those Andre signs really meant. We torrent TV shows. We are the worst.
                  Feel better?

                  In otherwords have healthy boundaries. Do you not understand dressing people in your clothes without permission is creepy and wrong?

  5. Kitschensyngk
    Kitschensyngk
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    You may want to move that ETD up a bit.

  6. Rosicrucian
    Rosicrucian
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    Becky’s got skills.

  7. Maxy
    Maxy
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    This is pretty much the reverse of how Joyce-mom got the dress on her in the first place, right?

  8. inqntrol
    inqntrol
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    Well, that’s one way to change clothes quickly.

  9. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    “How did you know I’d survive that?” “Oh, you’re still alive.” – some show or movie I don’t remember well enough to remember the title of.

    • Achallenger
      Achallenger
      July 3, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

      im gonna say anime, but ive been on a new show binge and they kinda blurred. maybe blue exorcist or devil is a part timer/

    • Silamy
      Silamy
      July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

      Wasn’t that the Avengers?

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:15 am | #

      Probably because I’ve been on and endless binge loop of it, it sounds like something Reese would say to Fusco in Person of Interest.

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      July 3, 2016 at 12:18 am | #

      I was gonna Do the Google, but the only significant result is this page (already!)

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      July 3, 2016 at 12:23 am | #

      Hudson Hawk: You’re supposed to be all cracked up at the bottom of the hill!
      Tommy Five-Tone: Airbags! Can you fucking believe it?
      Anna: You’re supposed to be blown up into fiery chunks of flesh!
      Tommy Five-Tone: Sprinkler system set up in the back! Can you *fucking* believe it?

      • LynziGraye
        LynziGraye
        July 3, 2016 at 1:37 am | #

        Just when I think Willis’ commenters can’t get any better, they prove me wrong.

        +1 Internet for you for the Hudson Hawk reference. 🙂

        • SgtWadeyWilson
          SgtWadeyWilson
          July 3, 2016 at 4:46 am | #

          Bruce Willis at his best… with Moonlighting and Die Hard in second and third, respectively.

          Add another +1 to that.

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            July 3, 2016 at 6:28 pm | #

            I never would’ve believed Da Vinci to be a Cadillac man until Richard Grant convinced me otherwise.

      • Paul1963
        Paul1963
        July 3, 2016 at 10:09 am | #

        Me, in the theater: “No, I cannot fucking believe airbags in the back seat of a 1955 Imperial, you dumbass screenwriter, director and everyone else involved in letting that line make it into the finished film! Or the sprinkler system, which isn’t even a thing!”

        • DSL
          DSL
          July 3, 2016 at 1:27 pm | #

          Alone, I take it.

    • Palamdrone
      Palamdrone
      July 3, 2016 at 12:24 am | #

      I feel like that’s from a Dragonball Abridged episode.

      • Seibertronian
        Seibertronian
        July 3, 2016 at 12:30 am | #

        I think you are thinking of when Goku arrived back from space claiming that he thought everyone, or at least Yamcha, would have been Yamcha’d by Cyborg Frieza, after which he turns around nonchalantly and says hi to Yamcha.

    • David Alexander McDonald
      David Alexander McDonald
      July 3, 2016 at 12:35 am | #

      http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HowDidYouKnowIDidnt because I want to curse everybody with a weekend wasted in the bowels of TV Tropes (You Can Never Read Just One Entry.)

      • magicallady
        magicallady
        July 3, 2016 at 2:45 am | #

        you monster

      • Stairmasternem
        Stairmasternem
        July 3, 2016 at 7:17 am | #

        The other day I discovered Dumbing of Age! Had a TV Tropes entry. It was not a productive day.

    • Annamal
      Annamal
      July 3, 2016 at 1:26 am | #

      MIB 2 “It grows back????”

    • EvilMidnightLurker
      EvilMidnightLurker
      July 3, 2016 at 2:00 am | #

      Aladdin sequel movie version: “I thought you said genies couldn’t kill anyone!”

      Genie Jafar: “You’d be surprised what you can live through.”

      • Gecko
        Gecko
        July 3, 2016 at 6:05 pm | #

        Okay, I never watched the sequel, and probably won’t, but that was genuinely funny.

  10. Hoboturtle
    Hoboturtle
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    Is it weird that I feel tempted to find one of my least liked shirts and see if I can tear it off myself?

    • Achallenger
      Achallenger
      July 3, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

      protip: grab an icepack first. i dunno how specifically, but ur gona hurt urself. i cut my kneck once, also pulled a chest mujscle, seperate disrobing accidents. truly i live an adventuras life

      • JetstreamGW
        JetstreamGW
        July 3, 2016 at 1:12 am | #

        That is some amazing typo game.

    • Silamy
      Silamy
      July 3, 2016 at 12:15 am | #

      I’d advise against doing this… I’ve had clothing ripped off before, and it was pretty painful, even though the shirt was kinda flimsy. Then again, I was neither the one pulling the shirt off me nor was I prepared, so….

      • Leorale
        Leorale
        July 3, 2016 at 12:19 am | #

        The trick is to be covered in spikes first. Like, if you’re a porcupine, you’re set.

        • Silamy
          Silamy
          July 3, 2016 at 12:53 am | #

          Becky is a hedgehog?

          • JetstreamGW
            JetstreamGW
            July 3, 2016 at 1:12 am | #

            WAY past cool.

          • Darkoneko
            Darkoneko
            July 3, 2016 at 10:53 am | #

            Gotta go fast

          • pyrpyr
            pyrpyr
            July 3, 2016 at 3:41 pm | #

            She has the hair for it, if she combs it back instead of to the side

      • Lovely Monsters
        Lovely Monsters
        July 3, 2016 at 6:08 am | #

        I feel like there’s a story here . . .

    • March
      March
      July 3, 2016 at 12:27 am | #

      This, as always with drawn clothing exaggerated, BUT

      Tee shirts are actually sewn in a pattern that has the stitching in such a strong place that makes this impossible (for obvious practical reasons, seeing as tee shirts were meant to be shirts for people performing physical labor) whereas some dress shirts have a joining in the middle of the back and along the shoulders. This is to help accommodate different shoulder widths with off-the-rack stuff, but it also weakens the actual shirt.

      If you have a proper dress shirt you don’t care about, flex in a pose that stresses your upper body (Hulk out, basically), and you’ll feel the give as the seams stretch across your back.

      • Moon
        Moon
        July 3, 2016 at 12:35 am | #

        I actually pulled a Fat Man in a little coat scene on stage in high school… somehow I had bulked up between first dress rehearsals and closing night and ended up tearing the back of my jacket during my murder scene… it actually worked out really well but i was sad, because I really liked my jacket and was planning on wearing it to the after party

        • AgentKeen
          AgentKeen
          July 3, 2016 at 12:45 am | #

          From my high school experience, you should’ve worn it anyhow, as a trophy.

          • Moon
            Moon
            July 3, 2016 at 1:54 am | #

            I would have… except since the murder scene was rather physical, it wasn’t wearable after the fact lol. God i loved that play though! I really miss my victim/ex girlfriend lol. We actually broke up that day so i think our murder scene was a bit more involved overall.

            • AGV
              AGV
              July 3, 2016 at 4:59 am | #

              That had to be dramatic

              • Ana Chronistic
                Ana Chronistic
                July 3, 2016 at 10:13 pm | #

                all these Pennies after Jason, talking about murder-breakups, eerie

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      July 3, 2016 at 10:12 pm | #

      actual tear-away clothing either has Velcro in strategic places or loose stitching/cuts

      so after you break like a LOT of the seams, go for it!

  11. Stephen R. Bierce
    Stephen R. Bierce
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    Who wears Short Shorts? (I don’t but don’t mind those who do.)

    • Uncertainty Moth
      Uncertainty Moth
      July 3, 2016 at 12:22 am | #

      *plays Flying Purple People Eater on the hacked Muzak*

      • zoelogical
        zoelogical
        July 3, 2016 at 12:38 am | #

        sure looks strange to me!!

    • Jason
      Jason
      July 3, 2016 at 4:50 am | #

      Nair users.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      July 3, 2016 at 11:49 am | #

      Carla, I think. And maybe Sal?

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        July 3, 2016 at 4:52 pm | #

        Malaya has also worn short shorts.

  12. D.J.
    D.J.
    July 3, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    And the flowers are still standing!

    • Dana
      Dana
      July 3, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      I’m a little fuzzy on this whole good/bad thing.

      • Sheason
        Sheason
        July 3, 2016 at 12:34 am | #

        I love this plan! I’m excited to be a part of it!

        • Deanatay
          Deanatay
          July 3, 2016 at 10:27 am | #

          yes, it’s true! This man… has no dick.

          • Firedaws
            Firedaws
            July 3, 2016 at 12:43 pm | #

            “We should split up.”
            “Yeah, we’ll do more damage that way.”

  13. John
    John
    July 3, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    I appreciate Becky’s magic trick.

    • Stephen R. Bierce
      Stephen R. Bierce
      July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

      Willis is probably friends with Henry Winkler on Facebook.
      Yes, you CAN be friends with Henry Winkler on Facebook. Don’t look at me like that.

      • John
        John
        July 3, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

        I can’t. I’m not on Facebook.

        Though the local police department posted a picture of me on their Facebook a few days ago.

        • NelC
          NelC
          July 3, 2016 at 12:54 am | #

          How much is the reward? Asking for a friend.

          • John
            John
            July 3, 2016 at 12:13 pm | #

            Nah, they just thought I was so cool that they wanted a selfie with me.

  14. CandidCanid
    CandidCanid
    July 3, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    I’d like to know how her arms magically phased through the sleeves. Why does Carol own clothing of this sort, I cannot fathom.

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      July 3, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      Everyone has their own secrets, including Carol.

    • Mollyscribbles
      Mollyscribbles
      July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      Arms and neck; the back of the neck is intact, too.

      • David
        David
        July 3, 2016 at 11:36 am | #

        You don’t know that. However, given the overall look of the parts we can see, Becky has either swapped the dress for a hologram or had pilfered a straight razor from the bathroom previously and found the time and way to get to work on the dress somehow.

        No wait, I got it: superunglue.

    • caesaria82
      caesaria82
      July 3, 2016 at 12:07 am | #

      I think that’s the point, they didn’t? She tore it off with brute force? Or am I interpreting this wrong lol.

    • Jeudi Violist
      Jeudi Violist
      July 3, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

      It’s ’cause being a redhead gives you superpowers.

    • zoelogical
      zoelogical
      July 3, 2016 at 12:25 am | #

      she’s been saving it since the seventies

    • Wizard
      Wizard
      July 3, 2016 at 12:37 am | #

      She didn’t actually rip off the dress, she used her lesbian powers to teleport out of it.
      (Lesbians can teleport, right?)

      • Darkoneko
        Darkoneko
        July 3, 2016 at 7:26 am | #

        Yes.

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        July 3, 2016 at 4:59 pm | #

        No… *nervous eye glances* *sudden disappearance with a *vorp* sound*

        • Ed Rhodes
          Ed Rhodes
          July 4, 2016 at 8:55 am | #

          Teleporters make a “bampf” sound, I thought everyone knew that!

          • Roborat
            Roborat
            July 4, 2016 at 3:56 pm | #

            I thought it was “ka-poit”.

    • Moon
      Moon
      July 3, 2016 at 12:38 am | #

      You see, the soul actually resides in the arms and that is what makes arms tactile to non-living, church-going things. Since red-heads obviously don’t have souls she phased through it.

    • Lovely Monsters
      Lovely Monsters
      July 3, 2016 at 6:10 am | #

      Oh, that’s no big deal. If she’d been holding a gun, though, it would have gotten caught in the fabric. She can’t form complex machinery.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      July 3, 2016 at 11:52 am | #

      Becky is a T-1000 made out of liquid metal, so this stuff is easy.

      Part of the ongoing struggle to prevent the birth of Resistance leader Joshua Seigal.

    • ESM
      ESM
      July 3, 2016 at 6:16 pm | #

      Ironically, Carol is a witch.

  15. Kindra
    Kindra
    July 3, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    Of course Becky was wearing comfortable clothes under that dress, and of course she was out of it at the first opportunity. Go Becky!

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

      Hah, Joyce did the same thing with her date with Joe. At least on the pants department.

      • Silamy
        Silamy
        July 3, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

        There are people who DON’T automatically wear pants under dresses?

        • Stairmasternem
          Stairmasternem
          July 3, 2016 at 12:22 am | #

          There’s a poll that’d be awkward to carry out.

          • Silamy
            Silamy
            July 3, 2016 at 12:26 am | #

            I’m sure there are plenty of people using subways who already have.

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 12:54 am | #

          It’s quite natural to pant under dis dress.

        • Slartibeast Button, BIA
          Slartibeast Button, BIA
          July 3, 2016 at 7:40 am | #

          Oddly enough, last night two women were talking about how they always wore shorts under skirts in school so they could play on the monkey bars.

        • trlkly
          trlkly
          July 3, 2016 at 7:57 am | #

          Seeing as there was a thing in my high school about not wearing underwear under the concert band uniforms–yes.

    • Pat
      Pat
      July 3, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

      She was forcibly dressed. It makes sense.

  16. Dana
    Dana
    July 3, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    It seems Hank is done trying to put off the inevitable confrontation with Carol.

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:07 am | #

      I think they had their confrontation the day before. Win or lose, clearly Habk is going with keeping Joyce in College.

      • Dana
        Dana
        July 3, 2016 at 12:14 am | #

        That’s not how I read it, but the only facial expressions we saw were Joyce’s while listening in, and she’s out of her depth the moment her parents aren’t a united front.

        • Stairmasternem
          Stairmasternem
          July 3, 2016 at 12:19 am | #

          Yeah, Joyce left so we do not see how the whole thing ended. Hank could’ve convinced Carol to let the kids go back, but then Joyce took the car so she could’ve used that to justify keeping her home instead. Hank covered and prevented this justification.

          It’s moot anyways since Hank’s sending them off it seems.

    • zoelogical
      zoelogical
      July 3, 2016 at 12:26 am | #

      not necessarily; he’s talking to some other dude about taking his wife home instead of to his wife about catching a ride.

      • Silamy
        Silamy
        July 3, 2016 at 12:43 am | #

        That could potentially be considered courteous -making sure potential ride knows they’ll be needed for transport instead of (and maybe in addition to -he could’ve been planning to also tell Carol once he got up to her and Becky) telling his wife she was on her own or, worse, just disappearing with Joyce, Becky, and the car and leaving her stranded and unable to find them until it was too late to find a ride…. still, I’m inclined to actually guess with zoelogical here about Hank avoiding conflict, or at least trying to right now. (but maybe because he doesn’t want to spark a sh*tstorm in church during services, not because conflict-avoidance)

        • zoelogical
          zoelogical
          July 3, 2016 at 12:54 am | #

          it could go either way, yeah, but we know that carol doesn’t want joyce to go back to college, and leaving in the middle of church is, i feel, sort of implicitly going behind her back. it is a bit of a jump to assume that he’s not going to go talk to her after this but idk i can’t see how that wouldn’t be difficult since they’re pretty definitely not on the same page

      • Benwhoski
        Benwhoski
        July 3, 2016 at 8:04 am | #

        The impression I have here is that Hank is taking the girls back to school suddenly and quietly in order to spare Joyce the confrontation with Carol, not to avoid it himself.

    • TheAnonymousGuy
      TheAnonymousGuy
      July 3, 2016 at 1:05 am | #

      or just spare Joyce from being caught in the middle

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        July 3, 2016 at 9:09 am | #

        He may also be thinking the confrontation will be less explosive without Joyce present.

  17. Rodimiss
    Rodimiss
    July 3, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

    That’s way more dramatic than getting superglue on it, but hey, might as well go for it. Not much left to lose at this church.

  18. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    July 3, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

    Becky’s super strength confirmed? I mean, if that was not a tear-away dress, then that must’ve required some major physical force. Or just anger/frustration/secret lesbian superpowers.

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      The dress looks old. It probably is old.

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      Next strip: ” BECKY SMASH!”

    • Dana
      Dana
      July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

      You can be gay if we get to use your gay powers.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

        Your link is busted.

        • Dana
          Dana
          July 3, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

          Gay powers. Not sure what went wrong.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          July 3, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

          Pretty sure it was to here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdqdIvgCKzA

          SMBC is funny.

      • user 18
        user 18
        July 3, 2016 at 1:36 am | #

        Wait, powers is gay now too?

        • Slartibeast Button, BIA
          Slartibeast Button, BIA
          July 3, 2016 at 12:04 pm | #

          Old News: http://pvponline.com/comic/2011/07/13/the-secret-of-him

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      July 3, 2016 at 12:12 am | #

      Get harassed for a day or two solid, pent up anger can make you hella strong.

    • Silamy
      Silamy
      July 3, 2016 at 12:19 am | #

      I mean… women’s clothing, especially formal-ish clothing, does tend to be made of lighter/flimsier fabrics -I’m a bit confused about why the dress tore down the back, rather than the front where she was pulling, though.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        July 3, 2016 at 3:53 am | #

        There’s usually a zipper or seam down the middle of the back.

  19. Cephalo the Pod
    Cephalo the Pod
    July 3, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

    Okay so Hank has completely given up on convincing Carol to calm down about Becky and Joyce.

    • Pat
      Pat
      July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

      Sometimes just leaving quietly is the best solution.

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        July 3, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

        And then there’s times when such a departure can no longer happen quietly.

      • Stairmasternem
        Stairmasternem
        July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

        Or doing the Ozymandias way of revealing.

        “You’re not bringing those girls back to college?”

        “My dear, I did that twenty minutes ago.”

        • Lovely Monsters
          Lovely Monsters
          July 3, 2016 at 6:12 am | #

          I was expecting “Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair.” Took me a minute to catch up.

          • Brute
            Brute
            July 3, 2016 at 9:35 am | #

            same

          • David
            David
            July 3, 2016 at 11:41 am | #

            You can let your king of kings hang out until he despairs.

      • Mom
        Mom
        July 3, 2016 at 12:21 am | #

        Leave quietly? Becky will likely give the church a big birdie on departure than leave quietly.

        • Darkoneko
          Darkoneko
          July 3, 2016 at 7:31 am | #

          Probably not. She would likely find it to be disrespectful to God.

        • JustCheetoDust
          JustCheetoDust
          July 3, 2016 at 6:39 pm | #

          That’s more of a Morty Smith move.

      • Silamy
        Silamy
        July 3, 2016 at 12:28 am | #

        Becky…. rather intentionally has set “not quietly” as one of her defining personality traits, though.

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

      He probably won the argument the day before.

      • Undrave
        Undrave
        July 3, 2016 at 12:47 am | #

        He’s the husband, according to their rules Carol should just do whatever he says anyway.

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 1:00 am | #

          Unless he abandons faith in which case she should murder him in cold blood and dance about his grave singing Hallalujah.

          • Needfuldoer
            Needfuldoer
            July 3, 2016 at 3:54 am | #

            Ah, but if you tell that to the youth these days, they’ll never believe you.

            • Slartibeast Button, BIA
              Slartibeast Button, BIA
              July 3, 2016 at 12:08 pm | #

              I was happier then and I had nothing!

            • David
              David
              July 7, 2016 at 10:39 am | #

              You were lucky to have a host. We had to suck on a piece of damp cloth.

  20. Sporky
    Sporky
    July 3, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

    You know, when it’s just the shoes I think pink suits her.

  21. Achallenger
    Achallenger
    July 3, 2016 at 12:07 am | #

    new life goal; to casually she-hulk out of church clothes at church

  22. MorningDuck
    MorningDuck
    July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

    Kazam, indeed, Becky

  23. buddy
    buddy
    July 3, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

    today formally cemented my gayness for becky. thank you very much.

    • Spaz
      Spaz
      July 3, 2016 at 6:03 am | #

      I just realized that I cannot be gay for becky.

      Makes me sad.

      I can only be straight for becky. Stupid genetics.

  24. Cephalo the Pod
    Cephalo the Pod
    July 3, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

    Took me a minute to figure our what looked so different about Becky. Then realized that up until now she’s worn warmer clothing.

  25. 21Kable
    21Kable
    July 3, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

    Wow, either that dress is really weak or Becky is freaking strong, rip a whole dress off with one pull, teach me oh wise one
    😛

  26. Shiro
    Shiro
    July 3, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

    Thank god, officially ending the awkward and dangerous portion of this weekend.

    One hopes.

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

      Plenty of awkward to still get through at college though.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 3, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

      Hahahah, it is to laugh!

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      July 3, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

      sure

      • Tomas
        Tomas
        July 3, 2016 at 12:29 am | #

        –Spoken through steepled fingers of evil.

      • Svata
        Svata
        July 3, 2016 at 12:31 am | #

        Oh. Oh NO.

      • Xelgaex
        Xelgaex
        July 3, 2016 at 12:37 am | #

        Willis is just “I have not yet begun weekend!”

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 4:17 am | #

          Arguably, the poisoning of heaven is already in progress here, so the miðgarðsormr’s part has already commenced. Wait, “weekend”. I thought “worldend”. Never mind.

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          July 3, 2016 at 2:11 pm | #

          Come on now, do you even weekend?

      • Shiro
        Shiro
        July 3, 2016 at 1:43 am | #

        …something about those double thumbs up makes me hesitant to trust your sincerity here :c

        • Clif
          Clif
          July 4, 2016 at 12:33 am | #

          Most ominous sure ever.

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        July 3, 2016 at 5:04 pm | #

        Oh. OH. Oh dear… 🙁

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        July 3, 2016 at 5:30 pm | #

        Now I am picturing one of those “desperate journey though hostile territory” movies about the perilous trip back to the legendary paradise of Bl’m’tun.

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      July 3, 2016 at 12:25 am | #

      In Doa hope is just an illusion.

  27. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    July 3, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

    “A tear-a-what-now?”

    Kudos, Willis, for not trying to make it into a gag involving Terre Haute.

    • Jackson
      Jackson
      July 3, 2016 at 12:22 am | #

      The dress is Terre Haute couture.

      NO REGRETS NO REGRETS

    • HeroHog
      HeroHog
      July 3, 2016 at 6:49 am | #

      Every time I read that frame I chuckle like a little kid! I LOVE IT!

    • DSL
      DSL
      July 3, 2016 at 1:34 pm | #

      I heard locals pronounce it “terhoot.”

  28. Saaaam
    Saaaam
    July 3, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

    Looking forward to the Slipshine/Yotomoe comic of Powers and Mrs. Brown bangin’

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:12 pm | #

      Probably just end up being a pic of Carol eating cheese.

      • Nathan Blood
        Nathan Blood
        July 3, 2016 at 2:58 pm | #

        that made me laugh more then it should have

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      July 3, 2016 at 6:04 pm | #

      I can’t believe Yotomoe didn’t get right on drawing a cute girl ripping her clothes off.

  29. March
    March
    July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

    Thank gawd, that dress looked like some kind of penance on her.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 3, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

      It was a terrible dress (at least on Becky). I don’t know why Carol owns a dress in Becky’s size, but she’s doing it a favour by destroying it now.

      • inqntrol
        inqntrol
        July 3, 2016 at 12:30 am | #

        Indeed, Carol can use it to clean windows.

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 1:03 am | #

          Ah that’s how you do it. I was wondering about that stupid Windows 10 install.

        • GLaDOS
          GLaDOS
          July 3, 2016 at 7:05 am | #

          Now it’s a job that just suits me
          A window cleaner you would be
          If you could see what I can see
          When I’m cleaning windows…

      • trlkly
        trlkly
        July 3, 2016 at 8:00 am | #

        Easy. Go back to the beginning of the comic. Realize how much Becky looked like Carol….

  30. a4lbi
    a4lbi
    July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

    Just when I thought I couldn’t love Becky more!

  31. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    July 3, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

    I’d have tossed the remains at Carol myself.

    • Random832
      Random832
      July 3, 2016 at 12:33 am | #

      I suspect that Carol not immediately being informed that they’re leaving is an important part of Hank’s plan here.

      • Random832
        Random832
        July 3, 2016 at 12:36 am | #

        Obviously there is going to be a confrontation, but he wants Joyce and Becky to be 170 miles away from it.

        • Nathan Blood
          Nathan Blood
          July 3, 2016 at 3:01 pm | #

          i kind of get the feeling that once hank and carol have there inevitable argument thats shes gonna go to the college and try to rip joyce from it

    • newllend(henryvolt)
      newllend(henryvolt)
      July 3, 2016 at 1:13 am | #

      I’m disappointed that she didn’t throw some of the clothes she was wearing back at me though.

  32. Leorale
    Leorale
    July 3, 2016 at 12:14 am | #

    I’ma take a moment to enjoy Hank’s speechless stare in the last two panels.

  33. Lordess of Madness
    Lordess of Madness
    July 3, 2016 at 12:15 am | #

    Too bad my school dresses are made out of tougher stuff…

    • Spaz
      Spaz
      July 3, 2016 at 6:05 am | #

      did…..did you just try this after you read the comic?

      • Darkoneko
        Darkoneko
        July 3, 2016 at 7:33 am | #

        Yes.

  34. Dara
    Dara
    July 3, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

    YES KAZAM! 😀

  35. StClair
    StClair
    July 3, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

    “Wait, wait, wait! I’ve always wanted to do this. And…”
    *yank*
    “The flowers are still standing!”

  36. Teddae
    Teddae
    July 3, 2016 at 12:18 am | #

    hank’s really giving us a huge breath of fresh air, like damn.

    also, holy crap becky you’re friggin amazing *swoon*

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 12:26 am | #

      For basically being the only re occurring make Christian character, he does a good job at being empathetic.

      Yellow pants doesn’t count since I’m sure this is the last of him for a while. Unless he too gets mirdered to inspire genocide.

      • Darkoneko
        Darkoneko
        July 3, 2016 at 7:34 am | #

        Danny is, isn’t he ?

        • Stairmasternem
          Stairmasternem
          July 3, 2016 at 10:36 am | #

          Unsure on that. Previous continuity he probably was. This one it really hasn’t come up. My bet is atheist though.

          • Regalli
            Regalli
            July 3, 2016 at 5:59 pm | #

            Previous continuity Danny DEFINITELY was – he ended up being a pastor (and grew a beard, it was odd). I’m pretty sure this continuity he’s still defaulting to Christian and possibly even a more fundamentalist church, but not a really active member the way the Brown family is.

            • Spencer
              Spencer
              July 3, 2016 at 6:20 pm | #

              Danny is still nominally Christian, per word of Willis, and also considers going to Church something worth doing.

              • Stairmasternem
                Stairmasternem
                July 3, 2016 at 8:21 pm | #

                I guess that’s a confirmation then?

            • Stairmasternem
              Stairmasternem
              July 3, 2016 at 8:20 pm | #

              In the previous, sure when his personality was to be a wet blanket and his childhood friend was an atheist.

              This continuity he dated an atheist, is mainly conflicted about being bisexual due to ignorance not belief, and had no qualms with premarital hanky lanky, per Joyce’s words.

              If he is a Christian, it’d be in the loose way Billie is one.

              • Stairmasternem
                Stairmasternem
                July 3, 2016 at 9:33 pm | #

                …his childhood friend was Mary. Not sure how that came out as atheist.

  37. Ross
    Ross
    July 3, 2016 at 12:19 am | #

    This is so unfair, how can she do that, I can barely make ACTUAL tear-away dresses work correctly.

    • Ross
      Ross
      July 3, 2016 at 12:23 am | #

      I am an actor not a stripper

      • Bicycle Bill
        Bicycle Bill
        July 3, 2016 at 12:40 am | #

        SURRRRRE you are……

      • Chris Phoenix
        Chris Phoenix
        July 3, 2016 at 2:25 am | #

        “Not that there’s anything wrong with being a stripper, of course”

      • magicallady
        magicallady
        July 3, 2016 at 2:28 am | #

        is the tear away supposed to be in a whipping motion?

  38. Time Sage
    Time Sage
    July 3, 2016 at 12:21 am | #

    …I’m surprised Joyce knows what a Tearaway dress is

    • Xelgaex
      Xelgaex
      July 3, 2016 at 12:32 am | #

      Same tbh. Like I was thinking, “surely there must be other uses for the items than what is immediately springing to mind, but darned if I can readily think of one.” Maybe a sudden reveal that the worldly friend is in fact literally Satan in a church play or something?

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 1:05 am | #

      All part of whiteboard ding dong research.

    • newllend(henryvolt)
      newllend(henryvolt)
      July 3, 2016 at 1:09 am | #

      Joyce is sheltered, not uneducated.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      July 3, 2016 at 12:12 pm | #

      Another reason she stopped googling unfamiliar words and phrases.

  39. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    July 3, 2016 at 12:22 am | #

    They have Christ-o-grams now? CRIKEY!

  40. Tenchan
    Tenchan
    July 3, 2016 at 12:23 am | #

    Becky ripped off that dress…LIKE A BOSS!!!

  41. AeroQC
    AeroQC
    July 3, 2016 at 12:24 am | #

    Joyce: Tearaway dress
    Becky: Tear-a-what-now?
    Dina: Pterodactyl

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      July 3, 2016 at 1:29 am | #

      +10 internets

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      July 3, 2016 at 10:40 am | #

      Tear-a-what = Terawatt = 10^12 watts = Becky’s power level

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        July 3, 2016 at 2:15 pm | #

        Really? I was figuring 1.21 gigawatts.

  42. Victor Riley
    Victor Riley
    July 3, 2016 at 12:25 am | #

    Oh… Hank is taking them back without Carol’s knowledge? This will make that argument a little louder later when he gets home.

    • Silamy
      Silamy
      July 3, 2016 at 12:35 am | #

      Or right now. She IS sitting next to Becky -unless Becky was heading out to find Joyce and make sure she’s okay?

    • Will
      Will
      July 3, 2016 at 9:02 am | #

      A Very Bad argument without Joyce (and Becky) around to hear is better than a Slightly Less Bad argument with the girls still around.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        July 3, 2016 at 2:20 pm | #

        Which might well turn into an Even Worse argument once Joyce joins in.

  43. Random832
    Random832
    July 3, 2016 at 12:28 am | #

    Any article of clothing is a tearaway if you pull hard enough.

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 1:08 am | #

      Did did you rip off that chain mail? Shouldn’t the arm be on the other side of it?

      • John
        John
        July 3, 2016 at 2:24 am | #

        I actually have trouble with my mail ripping from the force of my movements, under my sword arm especially.

        • Lovely Monsters
          Lovely Monsters
          July 3, 2016 at 6:13 am | #

          I think if you need a sword to open your mail, you’re probably doing it wrong.

          • Darkoneko
            Darkoneko
            July 3, 2016 at 7:38 am | #

            I have a very small katana as a letter opener.

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      July 3, 2016 at 1:29 am | #

      I was about to post the same thing. Great Joes think alike.

      • magicallady
        magicallady
        July 3, 2016 at 2:25 am | #

        tis only a flesh wound!

  44. Rukduk
    Rukduk
    July 3, 2016 at 12:32 am | #

    Me a couple minutes ago: Whew, finally finished that four day drive from California to Michigan, maybe I should catch up on DoA.
    Me now: Oh, hell yes.

  45. cmd1095
    cmd1095
    July 3, 2016 at 12:33 am | #

    Hank’s reaction of “wtf how did she just…” is the greatest

    • Silamy
      Silamy
      July 3, 2016 at 12:51 am | #

      Hank’s reaction is most of the comments right now, I think.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:16 pm | #

      “I’ve been doing it wrong all along…”

  46. Bunny
    Bunny
    July 3, 2016 at 12:38 am | #

    Hank is about to make his stand with Carol. He’s getting Joyce and Becky out of Carols reach to prevent them from being hostages or collateral damage in that conflict. He’s a “no quarter” kind of man. He’s just realized that not only is this community not his kind of people, but they might just turn cannibal when he speaks up. The problem is, Carol might decide he’s not Her kind of people. He realizes this, and it makes him sad. But he wouldn’t be true to himself if he didn’t speak truth. Hank’s got some pain ahead. Rock on, Hank!

    Also, Becky is my spirit animal

    • ischemgeek
      ischemgeek
      July 3, 2016 at 8:51 am | #

      Hank strikes me as being more like Jocelyne than like Joyce (as much as he sees himself in Joyce) – he picks his battles, but when he’s decided a battle is worth fighting, look out because all fucking hell is about to break loose.

      Joyce, on the other hand, doesn’t really pick her battles – it could be she’s similar to Carol in that she has to speak out against everything that bugs her, or it could be she is what Jocelyne and Hank were before they learned how to preserve mental health through strategic battle-picking.

  47. AgentKeen
    AgentKeen
    July 3, 2016 at 12:45 am | #

    Well.
    Maybe they won’t be talking about the hair now?

  48. zmm
    zmm
    July 3, 2016 at 12:49 am | #

    Firstly.. impressive strength to do that.
    secondly.. she just tore up someone else’s dress.. sure not the most pleasant of people–but someone who is letting you stay at her house and such… and past the unpleasant mother, the dad is fairly nice and thats causing him problems..
    soo.. Zannen desu ne

    • Rutee
      Rutee
      July 3, 2016 at 3:18 am | #

      Going by her (admittedly, likely-exaggerated) telling of it, Becky never consented to this dress in the first place.

      • David
        David
        July 3, 2016 at 3:40 am | #

        Non-consensual dressing sounds like a disagreeable condiment.

        • JustCheetoDust
          JustCheetoDust
          July 3, 2016 at 6:18 am | #

          Or the result of Krieger’s actions as the “pita predator” in the Archer pilot.

  49. Mia
    Mia
    July 3, 2016 at 12:55 am | #

    I love everything about Becky. I aspire to be her.

  50. Tacos
    Tacos
    July 3, 2016 at 12:56 am | #

    Becky’s been wanting to do that since she was given that dress hasn’t she?

    • magicallady
      magicallady
      July 3, 2016 at 2:23 am | #

      yes!

  51. Speedball
    Speedball
    July 3, 2016 at 12:57 am | #

    “It was brisk. I dressed in layers.”

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:20 pm | #

      I think it’s obvious that Carol wouldn’t approve.

  52. Brasca1
    Brasca1
    July 3, 2016 at 1:00 am | #

    Now that’s how you exit a church!

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      July 3, 2016 at 1:41 am | #

      Yep, she brought down the house. Or should I say, church?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 3:07 am | #

      And not even a single table flipped.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        July 3, 2016 at 2:17 pm | #

        They haven’t left yet, maybe she’ll get one on the way out.

  53. The Pink Bunny
    The Pink Bunny
    July 3, 2016 at 1:08 am | #

    Becky’s face in panel 4 just screams “I’ve always wanted to try this!”

    I love it

  54. David
    David
    July 3, 2016 at 1:10 am | #

    An exorcism is the last thing Hank has time for right now.

    • bryy
      bryy
      July 3, 2016 at 2:42 am | #

      And that’s exactly what is coming if he does not get the kids out of there.

      • Trousle Undrhil
        Trousle Undrhil
        July 3, 2016 at 2:07 pm | #

        “kids” … more like young adults.

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          July 3, 2016 at 2:20 pm | #

          It’s all relative.

  55. miz
    miz
    July 3, 2016 at 1:22 am | #

    Okay, forget the superhero, THIS is the first unrealistic thing I’ve ever seen in this comic. Becky is a dang wizard.

  56. grantimusmax
    grantimusmax
    July 3, 2016 at 1:41 am | #

    Becky McIntyre will be played this evening by Bender Bending Rodriguez.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:22 pm | #

      And if you don’t like it you can kiss her shiny freckled ass.

  57. Russ
    Russ
    July 3, 2016 at 1:41 am | #

    Becky is way fucking stronger than we all thought.

    • Russ
      Russ
      July 3, 2016 at 1:42 am | #

      Also no way is Hank sneaking them out of church without someone giving him shit

      • fogel
        fogel
        July 3, 2016 at 2:20 am | #

        Like Carol? Why does this feel like the penultimate scene of The Graduate?

        • Willoughby Chase
          Willoughby Chase
          July 3, 2016 at 4:10 am | #

          I’m hoping for the cross jammed in the door.

    • Will
      Will
      July 3, 2016 at 9:05 am | #

      In more than one way.

  58. Lunias
    Lunias
    July 3, 2016 at 1:45 am | #

    The church I used to go to with my family had an auditorium that doubled as a gymnasium. Are you sure this doesn’t take place in Ohio? Maybe it’s just the proximity?

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      July 3, 2016 at 6:11 pm | #

      Don’t Ohio and Indiana sit on either side of Illinois?

      • DonDueed
        DonDueed
        July 3, 2016 at 6:33 pm | #

        Nope, Indiana is west of Ohio, Illinois is west of Indiana. Maybe you’re thinking of Iowa, which is west of Illinois.

  59. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    July 3, 2016 at 1:53 am | #

    ….

    Okay, posting rules. Is this one of these situations where we ARE allowed to shout “take it off!”, or not?

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 2:04 am | #

      You are insatiable.

    • 3-I
      3-I
      July 3, 2016 at 2:07 am | #

      woooo~

    • magicallady
      magicallady
      July 3, 2016 at 2:32 am | #

      i wouldnt

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:23 pm | #

      That’s probably the only acceptable way to post it.

  60. magicallady
    magicallady
    July 3, 2016 at 2:22 am | #

    goodbye ugly pink dress

  61. Showler
    Showler
    July 3, 2016 at 2:27 am | #

    That dress is ripped. And so is Becky.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 3:05 am | #

      applauds

  62. Liminality
    Liminality
    July 3, 2016 at 2:30 am | #

    holy crap… how strong is she? Or how fragile was that dress?

  63. BenRG
    BenRG
    July 3, 2016 at 2:34 am | #

    Something tells me that the general response of the congregation to Becky’s stunt is a sort of shocked amazement. “Whoa…! How did she do that…?” “It’s like that stunt with the table cloth…!”

    Meanwhile… What the hell is going on? Why does Hank suddenly want to be out of that place now rather than later? Something is up; something to which Joyce and Becky are invited but Carol is not. I suspect that at least one more strange or unexpected revelation awaits Joyce this weekend.

    • bryy
      bryy
      July 3, 2016 at 2:41 am | #

      Hank wants to get out of there before Carol can get control/authority of the situation and keep Becky and Joyce there. He knows that it is unhealthy for the kids and that the longer they stay there (especially Becky), the higher the percentage for something like an Intervention rises.

      Carol ALREADY has been shown to be trying to “re-convert” Becky (“If you think there’s something you need forgiveness for”). Carol gives exactly ZERO shits that Becky’s dad tried to kidnap her at gunpoint.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        July 3, 2016 at 4:05 am | #

        That’s because she agrees with his motivation of “saving her” from the magical man in the ground and bringing ber back to the magical man in the sky. Methodology is irrelevant, only results matter.

    • magicallady
      magicallady
      July 3, 2016 at 2:42 am | #

      maybe two!

    • Guairdean Beatha
      Guairdean Beatha
      July 3, 2016 at 5:54 pm | #

      The reaction could be something like “Behold, she has revealed herself and all of her freckles are in threes like the Holy Trinity! She is the chosen one!” OK, probably not.

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      July 3, 2016 at 6:00 pm | #

      I also suspect he might be planning to smuggle them back to school before Carol has a chance to reopen the argument that Joyce shouldn’t go back at all. Weekend is almost over after all.

  64. bryy
    bryy
    July 3, 2016 at 2:37 am | #

    So apparently I will not be getting my Carol/Joyce confrontation in this arc.
    Hm.
    Well played, Willis.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 3, 2016 at 4:07 am | #

      That’s probably being saved for when DoA hits Thanksgiving, unless they go back to La Porte for another weekend.

      • Stairmasternem
        Stairmasternem
        July 3, 2016 at 6:53 am | #

        Maybe Dorothy invites Joyce to her house for Thanksgiving? She knows Joyce’s situation so it wouldn’t be far fetched.

        I could see Becky going to Dina’s and being absolutely bored by her quiet parents. Then dinosaurs, thus end of boredom.

    • Darkoneko
      Darkoneko
      July 3, 2016 at 7:41 am | #

      Maybe she saw it coming and is already waiting in front of the car

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      July 3, 2016 at 7:30 pm | #

      Apart from it being something that can be worked in later, I like that it’s Hank deciding to just avoid the drama and get Joyce and Becky out of a bad situation.

      Also Joyce needs a damn break already, I mean jeez.

  65. Neeks
    Neeks
    July 3, 2016 at 2:53 am | #

    Becky sure knows how to make an exit. Very sweet of her to leave one heck of a mending job for Carol, too.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 3:04 am | #

      At least she didn’t use super glue.

  66. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 3, 2016 at 2:57 am | #

    This is where the Becky Theme starts playing full strength. The good church goers swooning, pastors choking on their beards, angels high fiving each other, Jennifer#3 crying bitter tears because she missed it, Dina, far far away getting a strange feeling in her pants.

    YOU GO BECKY!!!!!!!

  67. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 3, 2016 at 3:03 am | #

    Panel 3, Becky is a bit disappointed she couldn’t stay to the “Pray away the gay-part”. The undressing could have been even more dramatic.

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 3:44 am | #

      Well, all the gay is gone from the dress already.

  68. Jesse
    Jesse
    July 3, 2016 at 3:14 am | #

    Apparently, Becky just summoned a rapping genie to torment the homophobes by making them listen to him “Green egg and ham it”.

  69. vivid
    vivid
    July 3, 2016 at 3:25 am | #

    i was about to write “becky confirmed for shamwow guy” but then i realized she actually said kazam. damnit willis you ruined my joke before it was even born

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 3:42 am | #

      Damn you Willis

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 3, 2016 at 4:11 am | #

      Becky confirmed for Shaquille O’Neal?

    • trlkly
      trlkly
      July 3, 2016 at 8:05 am | #

      So she’s instead confirmed for a basketball player turned genie.

  70. Chonos
    Chonos
    July 3, 2016 at 3:39 am | #

    I thought Becky graduated high school.

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 3:59 am | #

      She was an ursa major.

      • Darkoneko
        Darkoneko
        July 3, 2016 at 7:43 am | #

        That pun is unBearable.

  71. David
    David
    July 3, 2016 at 3:48 am | #

    And now the whole confla- congregation desperately tries dressing Becky with their eyes.

    • OnyxIdol
      OnyxIdol
      July 3, 2016 at 5:41 am | #

      Dressing or undressing?

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 6:55 am | #

      They’re too busy mingling to notice. Half of them apparently decided not to even acknowledge her existence anyways?

      • David
        David
        July 3, 2016 at 7:41 am | #

        Well, if they are not acknowledging her existence, shouldn’t they be troubled by Carol’s dress lying ripped on the floor?

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          July 3, 2016 at 10:10 pm | #

          Not half as troubled as they were about it floating around on its own among them.

  72. CleverTrousers
    CleverTrousers
    July 3, 2016 at 3:49 am | #

    Where Becky live now?

    • Lulu
      Lulu
      July 3, 2016 at 3:55 am | #

      We need Becky & Dina sexy lesbian dinosaur webcam chat going live…

  73. David
    David
    July 3, 2016 at 3:56 am | #

    Sooooo. Becky hopped on board to La Porte because Billy needed her bed back. And now when they come back they will need a bed for Hank as well?

    Well-played, Becky. And now we don’t even have the dress for camouflaging Hank any more.

  74. Just Me
    Just Me
    July 3, 2016 at 4:13 am | #

    There should be one more panel where Becky replies, “It is now.”

  75. David
    David
    July 3, 2016 at 4:37 am | #

    You know what? When Carol was going to hear of Hank driving off Joyce and Becky, she was going to rend her clothes anyway. Becky just saved her the effort.

  76. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    July 3, 2016 at 4:54 am | #

    All clothes are tear-away clothes if you try hard enough.

  77. Will
    Will
    July 3, 2016 at 5:08 am | #

    Last strip, when Hank said “lets get you back to Bloomington”, he meant “lets get you two back to Bloomington right now.”

    • Stairmasternem
      Stairmasternem
      July 3, 2016 at 6:57 am | #

      He probably realized that this weekend meant to de stress her daughter has done the complete opposite.

      I hope we get more Hank interactions in the future. Maybe Joyce will call him more instead of Carol.

  78. OnyxIdol
    OnyxIdol
    July 3, 2016 at 5:17 am | #

    Wow, Becky really ran out of fucks to give, didn’t she.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:26 pm | #

      That implies that she had some to start with here.

  79. Darkoneko
    Darkoneko
    July 3, 2016 at 6:35 am | #

    Hey, destroying lended clothes ain’t cool !

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      July 3, 2016 at 7:43 am | #

      I dunno, there’s no visual indicator that the dress was actually ripped off, like frayed edged or anything.

      I think the joke is that Becky got it off without tearing it.

      • Darkoneko
        Darkoneko
        July 3, 2016 at 7:48 am | #

        [now after reading all the other comment]
        I’m going with the magically teleported out of them theory, after all.

        • Trousle Undrhil
          Trousle Undrhil
          July 3, 2016 at 2:07 pm | #

          Maybe there *are* alien abductees in this universe …. and Becky is one of them?

  80. theheroesofcrash
    theheroesofcrash
    July 3, 2016 at 7:57 am | #

    When I was a child, I saw “Fellowship Time” as “Snack Time”. Now that I’m an adult… yeah, I’m still making a beeline for the snacks.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:29 pm | #

      And this just pisses me off. Five minutes? Screw that, my church it like a solid hour. And we have two snack tables. All kinds of goodies there, `specially when I’m running them.

    • Daisetsu
      Daisetsu
      July 3, 2016 at 3:41 pm | #

      My church never had this “Fellowship Time” thing… We were just in service for about 2 hours (or less, depending on a multitude of things) and then we just left for home or wherever.

  81. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 3, 2016 at 8:15 am | #

    But, but, but what is pastor-mc-beard going to do with his passive aggressive homophobic sermon about the importance of honoring your father and not getting them thrown into jail now?

    • Trolldrool
      Trolldrool
      July 3, 2016 at 10:50 am | #

      A sermon about honouring your father when he tells you to grab your gay friend and haul ass out of church?

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        July 3, 2016 at 2:32 pm | #

        He’ll probably just dress it up with something about “Being happy on a journey to discover knowledge about one’s self”.

  82. Aaron
    Aaron
    July 3, 2016 at 8:51 am | #

    This may not be the best strip to post this in, Willis, but it occurred to me:
    You might kinda be our generation’s Garrison Keillor.
    http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2016/07/garrison-keillors-bipartisan-appeal/489761/

  83. Willoughby Chase
    Willoughby Chase
    July 3, 2016 at 8:54 am | #

    Now get the hell out of there.

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 10:50 am | #

      I already opined that Hank does not have the leisure for an exorcism right now. Getting the hell out of there will have to be a task for another time. But it is becoming increasingly important to get Joyce and Becky out of there.

      • Willoughby Chase
        Willoughby Chase
        July 3, 2016 at 1:01 pm | #

        An exorcism on Becky, perhaps? Or on Carol?

        • David
          David
          July 3, 2016 at 1:59 pm | #

          The congregation. Getting the hell out of this congregation will take a lot of work since the hell has wormed itself pretty deep into it.

  84. AY
    AY
    July 3, 2016 at 9:09 am | #

    My high school boyfriend ripped his t-shirt off during a pep rally, once… also took place in a gymnasium.

  85. Henry
    Henry
    July 3, 2016 at 9:41 am | #

    Awesome becky is awesome!!!

    Though thinking about it, will this ruin Hank’s attempt to do this quietly? I assume that carol will be quick to figure it out but still.

  86. Ikari Shinji
    Ikari Shinji
    July 3, 2016 at 10:09 am | #

    ..the physics here are confusing me. Apparently she ripped the back from the front, then pulled it over her head between panels and the poses just seem to match in a misleading way?

    • Ikari Shinji
      Ikari Shinji
      July 3, 2016 at 10:12 am | #

      Also the belt that was in the way just vanished? Head hurts.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        July 3, 2016 at 2:33 pm | #

        It’s just a comic…

  87. Latona
    Latona
    July 3, 2016 at 10:27 am | #

    I know externals aren’t a measure of relationship with Christ, but I’d like to see Becky talk more about God <:. Just a few words about relying on him or talking about what he said to her or an off hand comment about praying or having read a verse or just a
    "hey Becky, why did you wear a dress you didn't like?"
    "I dunno,it's not a big deal, Christ tolerance/golden rule n' all that"

  88. Paul
    Paul
    July 3, 2016 at 10:29 am | #

    I really don’t get why Becky is choosing to make a scene at this point.

    Earlier, when Carol put the dress on her and Joyce was about to blow a gasket, Joyce held her tongue because Becky was willing to wear the dress to keep the peace. So, Becky is OK with using the dress as “camoflague.” But by tearing it off now, Becky has significantly reduced Hank’s chances of making a clean getaway back to Bloomington with Becky and Joyce. If Hank had managed to hustle the two girls out into the car while Carol’s back was turned, he might have been able to speed home, get Joyce’s stuff, and be on the road again before Carol could catch up with him. All of this would have served Becky and Joyce’s best interests. Becky has shown before that she is capable of stealth and strategic withdrawal when she needs to be. Now, the inevitable marital fight will be happening with Becky and Joyce present.

    • Latona
      Latona
      July 3, 2016 at 10:38 am | #

      A) I dont think Becky thinks threw all her decisions
      B) I think Joyce’s moderation in asking Becky first subconsciously inspired Becky to be more moderate and to realize that a war against discrimination isn’t a war against dresses* xD

      *yes, I realize that the dress came with larger cultural trappings but choseing battles and all that

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 11:07 am | #

      Because making a spectacle is Becky’s go-to reaction to criminalization of her sexual identity.

      She is actually heeding the gospel here:

      29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

      30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

      She is burning bridges that she is better off without. Yes, there will come a time when she may wish she hadn’t. And exactly that is the reason she is doing it: to close a door for good and throw away the key.

      • Willoughby Chase
        Willoughby Chase
        July 3, 2016 at 1:03 pm | #

        > She is actually heeding the gospel here:

        No she’s not.

        She’s being a bit of a show-off.

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      July 3, 2016 at 1:07 pm | #

      Paul, I still think Hank has a better-than-average chance of a clean getaway.  He’s got both Joyce and Becky and the car.  He can be back to the house, throw the girls’ stuff into paper bags if necessary, and be on the road back to Bloomington in less than 20 minutes.

      Carol is no dummy.  It will take her less time than it’s taking me to post this to figure out that the three of them are headed back to IU.  But she will have to find someone to either a) give her a ride home and then, make arrangements to follow them (another vehicle, perhaps, although there’s been no reference to a second car prior to this) or b) prevail on someone to drive HER to Bloomington in pursuit.

      While option ‘B’ is far more likely — most of the congregation is going to be on her side — it will still take time for them to get underway.

      But the end result will be the same with either scenario — the drama takes place back at Joyce’s dorm with an awful lot of curious and attentive bystanders around.

  89. pyrpyr
    pyrpyr
    July 3, 2016 at 10:38 am | #

    And to think that preview scene Willis showed us in Tumblr was merely Hank asking Powers to give Carol a ride home…
    I was genuinely worried there.

    Wait wait nope new implications still worried

  90. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    July 3, 2016 at 10:43 am | #

    Hank: That dress belonged to my mother…

    • David
      David
      July 3, 2016 at 10:54 am | #

      Father, actually.

  91. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    July 3, 2016 at 11:23 am | #

    … okay. Having stared at panels 4 and 5 for a bit, assuming Becky doesn’t release her grip on the dress in between those panels, and assuming the dress isn’t wide open and untied, unclasped, and unbuttoned along its back (including the backs of the sleeves), then what just happened here is physically impossible assuming an even-remotely Euclidean topology.

    ….

    … unless there’s some sort of phasing involved wherein substances become mutually-immaterial.

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      July 3, 2016 at 6:03 pm | #

      So Becky is Shadowcat, got it.

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        July 3, 2016 at 6:10 pm | #

        I hope this doesn’t mean she has to fight a demon when she is all alone next Christmas.

  92. George Wiman
    George Wiman
    July 3, 2016 at 11:44 am | #

    We didn’t go into the vector physics of Sal’s rescue of Amazi-girl (Spoiler: nope) so I give this scene a pass AND a thumbs-up. She’d been itching to yank that dress off since realizing she made a mistake agreeing to wear it in the first place.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 6:40 pm | #

      Not only itching – PLANNING. This was the ripost to Carol’s attempt to humiliate her with the dress.

      “What was that, Carol? I should be ashamed of my sexuality and hide it between extra-strength heteronormative clothes. Buuuut since I AM a lesbian I suppose I should just TAKE THE DRESS OFF!!!”.

      This is what made Becky smile in the last panel here
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/dresses/

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        July 3, 2016 at 7:06 pm | #

        Becky might be very very done with her “homecoming tour”.

  93. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    July 3, 2016 at 12:59 pm | #

    Found this on Facebook under “church funnies”.  Since Hank is talking to the youth pastor, I think it’s appropriate here:

    The youth pastor fell asleep during a staff meeting.  So we laid some clothes on the chairs and exited quietly.
    Then we blew a trumpet…..

    • Raza
      Raza
      July 3, 2016 at 1:28 pm | #

      I would pay to see that.

    • DSL
      DSL
      July 3, 2016 at 1:42 pm | #

      Kudos to you for knowing where to end that.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:34 pm | #

      I laughed so hard I started coughing.

  94. MapleAmber
    MapleAmber
    July 3, 2016 at 1:01 pm | #

    They’re not out yet… Confrontation at the door? In the parking lot? Oh the possibilities!
    But seriously, sneak away fast, Hank, and get the girls back to college.

  95. Bij
    Bij
    July 3, 2016 at 2:00 pm | #

    Destroying a cool dress like that is bad. Tear-ably bad.

    • pyrpyr
      pyrpyr
      July 3, 2016 at 3:24 pm | #

      SEW disrespectful

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        July 3, 2016 at 6:17 pm | #

        I hear it’s a cheap brand. You know, a real rip off.

  96. Trousle Undrhil
    Trousle Undrhil
    July 3, 2016 at 2:02 pm | #

    Becky could have waited to be outside to take the dress off. This way is just disrespectful and rude.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:35 pm | #

      I mean really? Show some respect and courtesy for other people. The nerve…

    • George Wiman
      George Wiman
      July 3, 2016 at 3:21 pm | #

      Exactly. The people at the church totally deserve respect, for the kind and supportive way they’ve treated her since she arrived.

      • PharmaDan
        PharmaDan
        July 3, 2016 at 3:32 pm | #

        Hey just because they be assholes doesn’t mean one should stoop to their level.

        You gotta be better than them… or you got to stoop lower!

    • Kay
      Kay
      July 3, 2016 at 5:17 pm | #

      It’s not like she got _naked_ or anything. She’s just refusing to pretend for people who can’t accept her as she is.

  97. Kay
    Kay
    July 3, 2016 at 2:24 pm | #

    DANG IT, BECKY.

    Stop sharing your secret lesbian powers with the straights!

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 3, 2016 at 2:37 pm | #

      Or last least showing them off to people incapable of appreciating them.

      Has someone made a list of lesbian powers demonstrated in DoA?

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        July 3, 2016 at 3:22 pm | #

        Do lesbians get invisibility powers? Or is that only bisexuals?

        • Cerberus
          Cerberus
          July 3, 2016 at 5:19 pm | #

          The list goes:

          Lesbians: General witchery and sorcery
          Gay men: Control over the weather
          Bisexuls: Invisibility
          Asexuals: Invisibility
          Trans people: Conversion magics to make people gay or straight as well as the ability to summon cataclysms
          Straight people: Actual legal and societal rights.

          • FinalOwen
            FinalOwen
            July 3, 2016 at 7:00 pm | #

            All bisexuals need to remember that our powers are ineffective around September 23rd, and as such, any bank robberies, poltergeist impersonations and general mischief need to be rearranged.
            Those who also fall under trans or ace umbrellas will probably get enough of a boost for things to work, though.

          • thecollector222
            thecollector222
            July 3, 2016 at 8:09 pm | #

            I’m both Trans, and a Lesbian, so do I get both power sets?

            • Cerberus
              Cerberus
              July 3, 2016 at 9:22 pm | #

              Indeed, which is why people hate and fear those of more than one marginalized identity. Because we become unto gods.

          • Orion Fury
            Orion Fury
            July 4, 2016 at 12:46 am | #

            You know, I think I’m fine with what I got.

  98. Aquatus
    Aquatus
    July 3, 2016 at 3:18 pm | #

    Hank: **Okay, let’s sneak the girls out of here all quiet like**
    Becky: **Beckies**
    Hank: **Allright, Plan B…**

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 6:16 pm | #

      Way to Becky it up, Becky.

  99. Cerberus
    Cerberus
    July 3, 2016 at 5:16 pm | #

    Entire congregation right about now: She’s a witch! Burn her!

    But seriously, I’m so happy Becky and Joyce are getting out of here before the triggering mess that would have been the sermon.

    And especially happy that Becky gets to be done trying to tiptoe around the glass and just absorb blows like she’s been doing. She’s been ready to leave since they arrived as has Joyce and I’m so happy for the two of them that Hank is walking the walk and making sure to get them back to the “magical place where they can be themselves” as Becky refers to it.

    And it’s a nice little touch that Hank refers to it as a family emergency, including Becky in the family part of that emergency. It’s a small step, but at the end of this, he could end up with 3 daughters who love him if he plays his cards right.

    Also? Becky=sorceress. Seriously, that dress doesn’t even look ripped in those last panels, so either she did that quick pull over the head thing I do sometimes or she straight up phased out of her clothes.

    • Kay
      Kay
      July 3, 2016 at 5:19 pm | #

      Second to last panel, bottom of the formerly tight dress. Only sign.

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        July 3, 2016 at 5:22 pm | #

        Yeah, but the same bottom seems to have reformed in the last panel.

        Wait… maybe the dress itself is magical. It was somehow put on her without her being able to react to it, so…!

        HOLY SHIT! It’s Satan’s church dress!

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          July 3, 2016 at 5:54 pm | #

          You know suddenly Carol’s fear of devilry makes a bit more sense HELL IS ACTUALLY IN HER CLOSET.

          She should probably see an exorcist about that. Or move.

          • Slartibeast Button, BIA
            Slartibeast Button, BIA
            July 3, 2016 at 6:05 pm | #

            She read an ancient prophecy about the danger that would come out of the closet, but she took it too metaphorically.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          July 3, 2016 at 7:42 pm | #

          It is the dress. More, it’s all the Brown’s clothes. Explains how Joyce was able to wrap her shirt around Sarah’s head before Sarah could see her take it off.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 3, 2016 at 6:21 pm | #

      Ooooooh, well spotted with the family emergency. Hank is Hanking it right.

  100. Regalli
    Regalli
    July 3, 2016 at 5:53 pm | #

    “Let’s get you back to Bloomington” meaning RIGHT NOW back to Bloomington, that is some A-plus dadding there.

    You’re potentially in for a huge storm tonight Hank, but given what Joyce and Becky need is to just be away from these people right now, that is good.

  101. Tenn
    Tenn
    July 3, 2016 at 6:57 pm | #

    So that’s what a strap-on is! And Joyce may be in luck; if it fits Becky, there’s a good chance it’ll fit her too! 😀

  102. Nate
    Nate
    July 3, 2016 at 8:17 pm | #

    When I first saw this posted I was like, “How long ’til the Becky haters start saying she’s awful for possibly ruining Carol’s dress/”causing a scene”?”

    None last night when I checked. But the comments didn’t disappoint today when I came back. I guess if you’re a loud character you’re bound to have a lot of haters! I’m not a huge Becky fan myself but I don’t get the hate. Although I am a loud, boisterous, and annoying person IRL myself, haha.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      July 4, 2016 at 12:50 am | #

      I was just being facetious.

  103. TabofManyColors
    TabofManyColors
    July 3, 2016 at 8:35 pm | #

    I’m gonna go with “Carol didn’t realize the dress was a tearaway when she bought it,” if only because the image of Carol talking to the clerk about how hard it is to find modest clothing while the clerk is ringing her up for her tearaway dress is kind of hilarious.

  104. Fang shinobi
    Fang shinobi
    July 3, 2016 at 9:23 pm | #

    I’m here reading about 2-hr services and snack times in churches, meanwhile i attended 1-hour Catholic masses and slept through them (I’m a bad Catholic as you can probably tell), and we only socialize a bit before and after masses. I can’t even last an hour in church… How…

  105. Mancuso
    Mancuso
    July 3, 2016 at 10:32 pm | #

    That look in the last panel… I hate to be the dirty old man but I daresay whatever Hank’s plans are, he’s been momentarily sidelined by the sudden realization that gay freckled boobies are all kinds of awesome.

    • Jackson
      Jackson
      July 3, 2016 at 11:19 pm | #

      To me he appears to be staring at the dress. I’m reading his expression as the “stunned disbelief” variety of “oh wow,” not so much the libido-related variety.

      Then again, given what Becky is wearing underneath, in a crowded conservative church, Hank may be among those looking for absolutely any alternative target at which to bounce their eyes.

    • Darastrix
      Darastrix
      July 3, 2016 at 11:30 pm | #

      As soon as the “I hate to be the dirty old man” crossed your mind, you really should have stopped right there.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        July 4, 2016 at 12:51 am | #

        Though that comment did take a while to pop up, and he was honest about it.

  106. Slapdash
    Slapdash
    July 4, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

    I still can’t get over how much of a dead ringer the pastor is for the pastor at my family’s church when I was growing up. As well as the congregation…

  107. Kris
    Kris
    July 4, 2016 at 2:23 am | #

    Becky always gave me Kimmy Gibbler vibes, but especially in this strip for some reason

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