Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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better check snopes, walky
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June 25, 2026

Included

by David M Willis on October 6, 2016 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Glower Vacuum
└ Tags: jennifer, joyce, mike, sarah, walky

Discussion (219) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. butts
    butts
    October 6, 2016 at 12:01 am | #

    Mike vs. Sarah, place your bets

    • user 18
      user 18
      October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

      It looks like we actually have Mike vs. Joyce back there

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        October 6, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

        It looks like she’s about to suplex him.

        BAH GAWD, SHE’S KILLED HIM.

        • butts
          butts
          October 6, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

          Walky gets his wish, Joyce gets some catharsis, Mike gets a nice six-foot hole in the ground. Everyone wins, really.

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            October 6, 2016 at 9:17 am | #

            Except that Walky doesn’t get straight ‘A’s for the semester, The internet LIED to him.

            • Clif
              Clif
              October 6, 2016 at 10:03 am | #

              My Sarah/Mike fantasies are being thwarted by Joyce. This is probably a good thing, but still …

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

          Mrs Warner’s baby boy been near broken in half!

          • LookingIn
            LookingIn
            October 6, 2016 at 1:02 am | #

            And he didn’t even get his nickel!

            • Clif
              Clif
              October 6, 2016 at 10:09 pm | #

              Yet.

      • Bluewind
        Bluewind
        October 6, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

        I know! She is a stout little bugger isn’t she? I know she’s punched a guy and a window, but she’s actively holding back Mike while wearing a cast (and touching some man chest might I add?). Go Joyce!

      • erejnion
        erejnion
        October 6, 2016 at 9:18 am | #

        IT WAS ALL A PLOT
        Mike gets to feel Joyce boobs on his back while being suplexed.

        • Slartibeast Button, BIA
          Slartibeast Button, BIA
          October 6, 2016 at 9:23 am | #

          Totally worth it.

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      Good ol’ Mike; always willing to take one for the team! 😉

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      October 6, 2016 at 12:44 am | #

      Sarah. Mike doesn’t do combat. Sarah does.

      Also, that’s Joyce. Ima bet on Joyce. If anyone can make her go red-eyes-of-fury and be stupid enough to do so, it’s Mike.

      • Disloyal Subject
        Disloyal Subject
        October 6, 2016 at 1:44 am | #

        I don’t think he can make her go full rage mode, because she doesn’t expect anything good of him like she did of her community.
        That said, her willingness to employ violence against confirmed assholes means he doesn’t have to.

        • Clif
          Clif
          October 6, 2016 at 10:11 pm | #

          And since he enjoys violence used against him, this creates a virtuous circle.

    • Flakky
      Flakky
      October 6, 2016 at 6:38 am | #

      Place your butts*

      • Clif
        Clif
        October 6, 2016 at 10:12 pm | #

        Already in place at the top.

    • Nezumi
      Nezumi
      October 6, 2016 at 2:17 pm | #

      In a straight fight, in this universe? Sarah. Definitely. Mike’s many things, but I doubt he’s nearly as good a brawler.

  2. Kelli
    Kelli
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    You talk to her… No, YOU talk to her…

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:07 am | #

      I’ll talk to her, except I don’t want to.

      • SgtWadeyWilson
        SgtWadeyWilson
        October 6, 2016 at 4:19 am | #

        NOT LOUD ENOUGH!

        (Am I saying that right?)

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          October 6, 2016 at 10:21 am | #

          The original is ‘hard’, though now I try to be creative in my use of it. Or at least varied.

          • SgtWadeyWilson
            SgtWadeyWilson
            October 6, 2016 at 5:25 pm | #

            I was more worried about the inflection, I feel like I could’ve put more emphasis on loud, but you know how paraphrasing goes, especially when you don’t know the original source

            • Orion Fury
              Orion Fury
              October 6, 2016 at 11:42 pm | #

              It did read a little soft on that part. But that just could of been the vowels at work there.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        October 6, 2016 at 7:08 am | #

        Good. You have something in common. She doesn’t want to talk to you either.

        Have fun.

  3. Speedball
    Speedball
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    They have a greenhouse? Nice!

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      October 6, 2016 at 12:38 am | #

      That’s where Professor Sprout conducts Herbology classes.

      • Jon Rich
        Jon Rich
        October 6, 2016 at 3:31 am | #

        God, I love this fandom.

    • Drs
      Drs
      October 6, 2016 at 12:49 am | #

      There really is. Attached to the biology building and open to the public. (Glares at Harvard.) I loved going there in winter; a few of the rooms are tall with trees, not just plants sprouting in pots.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 7:54 am | #

      They have it just to discourage webcomic artists. Not an airtight plan, but still.

  4. Anvilpro
    Anvilpro
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    I think this is the start of Mike and Sarah’s beautiful friendship.

    • butts
      butts
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      I mean, they’re both misanthropes, but they’ve got pretty much polar opposite forms of misanthropy.

      • Bluewind
        Bluewind
        October 6, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

        Agreed, but their personalities might bounce well off each other like Dina and Amber.

        • butts
          butts
          October 6, 2016 at 12:27 am | #

          Or they could murder each other. Who knows?

          • Bluewind
            Bluewind
            October 6, 2016 at 12:43 am | #

            …Willis?

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              October 6, 2016 at 12:45 am | #

              Has promised no character deaths, so if he is planning to have them murder each other, he’s lying to us about it.

              • Orion Fury
                Orion Fury
                October 6, 2016 at 12:54 am | #

                Non-canon slipshine?

                • Bluewind
                  Bluewind
                  October 6, 2016 at 1:00 am | #

                  Hatefuck 2: Evil is Coming
                  Staring Mike and Mary

              • Slartibeast Button, BIA
                Slartibeast Button, BIA
                October 6, 2016 at 7:55 am | #

                But he could have them planning to murder each other …

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  October 6, 2016 at 9:33 am | #

                  Which will blossom into true love! A la Mr. And Mrs. Smith

    • Proxiehunter
      Proxiehunter
      October 6, 2016 at 3:03 am | #

      Or Mike and Joyce’s beautiful Slipshine.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      October 6, 2016 at 1:29 pm | #

      A beautiful fiendship.

      Actually fiendship sounds like a great name for Mike/Mary.

  5. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    Nonono, Walky won’t get all As because his roommate died.

    He will get all As because Mike died, and it will be a campus-wide day of celebration.

    • Foxhack
      Foxhack
      October 6, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      AND EVERYONE GETS A NICKEL DISCOUNT AT SOMEONE’S MOM’S PLACE!

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        October 6, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

        NOT ENOUGH NICKELS!

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      October 6, 2016 at 1:29 pm | #

      With the death of Mr. Warner, all tests for the next school year have been cancelled!

      *Everyone cheers except Dorothy*

  6. achallenger
    achallenger
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    hug it out guys

  7. MatthewTheLucky
    MatthewTheLucky
    October 6, 2016 at 12:02 am | #

    Where’s the downside?

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      October 6, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

      We will never discover the secret of Mike’s hair, as he will take it to the grave.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        October 6, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

        I’m not even sure Willis knows it. I think I recall him trying to work it out when he was making a statue of him, for I believe a Kickstarter?

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        October 6, 2016 at 12:14 am | #

        I don’t think even Mike knows how his hair works.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        October 6, 2016 at 12:46 am | #

        SHAVE IT FROM HIS CORPSE AND DONATE IT TO SCIENCE!

        ….

        whadyamean science doesn’t want it?

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          October 6, 2016 at 12:52 am | #

          Watch it turn out to be an edgelord crown, cause breaking people just isn’t enough for him, he needs to break physics as well.

        • Deanatay
          Deanatay
          October 6, 2016 at 9:32 am | #

          Then create your OWN science!

          The Mike Warner Memorial Institute For Advanced Hair Science

          or, as Mike would name it:

          Hair Analysis and Technical Epistemology For Universal Care of Keratin
          (H.A.T.E.F.U.C.K.)

    • Nemirthel
      Nemirthel
      October 6, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

      We can’t introduce Mike to Mary?

      • Bluewind
        Bluewind
        October 6, 2016 at 12:12 am | #

        Oh yes please!

        • Bluewind
          Bluewind
          October 6, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

          Now I am thinking of new combos. Mike and Carla would be fun.

        • butts
          butts
          October 6, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

          Pretty sure if the two were ever to touch, they’d annihilate, wiping out most of Indiana.

          …on second thought, go right ahead

          • maxyai
            maxyai
            October 6, 2016 at 8:46 am | #

            I agree. Who needs Indiana?

      • MatthewTheLucky
        MatthewTheLucky
        October 6, 2016 at 12:28 am | #

        Even Mike doesn’t deserve having to deal with Mary. Being so vastly out-assholed would break his soul.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        October 6, 2016 at 12:47 am | #

        With their powers combined, they are ________!

        (Fill in the blank.)

        • Bluewind
          Bluewind
          October 6, 2016 at 12:52 am | #

          Your mom

          • Orion Fury
            Orion Fury
            October 6, 2016 at 12:53 am | #

            Your Face

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              October 6, 2016 at 1:25 am | #

              You misspelled “Faaaaaaaaaace”.

  8. brionl
    brionl
    October 6, 2016 at 12:03 am | #

    You only get ‘A’s if your roommate commits suicide.

    • Bluewind
      Bluewind
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      Isn’t pissing Sarah off basically committing suicide?

      • Idontcarenomore
        Idontcarenomore
        October 6, 2016 at 1:57 am | #

        No she’s seems to be violent only when her friend(s) are threatened.

        She will just scowl you to death.

      • John
        John
        October 6, 2016 at 3:03 am | #

        By Ankh-Morpork law, yes.

    • Nemirthel
      Nemirthel
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      Sooo… throw him out the window instead of using the bat?

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      You can read hovertext on mobile by tapping either empty area next to the navigation buttons under the comic.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        October 6, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

        Well, found another person who doesn’t know about the hover text then. Gotta be a few more still floating around somewhere.

        • Bicycle Bill
          Bicycle Bill
          October 6, 2016 at 12:27 am | #

          Then there the Luddites like myself who don’t check DoA on their mobile device.  That’s what laptops are for.
          Seriously, though — I have a 17-inch screen and a full-sized keyboard on the laptop versus a 5-inch screen on my Galaxy S4.  No contest.

          • Orion Fury
            Orion Fury
            October 6, 2016 at 12:50 am | #

            Laptop permanently hooked up to 32″ TV with wireless keyboard/mouse.

            • davidbreslin101
              davidbreslin101
              October 6, 2016 at 7:34 am | #

              One of my friends has a similar setup, but says she feels awfully self-concious checking her emails.

          • Romanticide
            Romanticide
            October 7, 2016 at 12:09 am | #

            you don’t find yourself sleeping in other people’s houses and in great need of check the strip of the night?

        • brionl
          brionl
          October 6, 2016 at 8:00 pm | #

          I read the hovertext, I was just ignoring it.

      • trlkly
        trlkly
        October 6, 2016 at 12:34 am | #

        Does the hovertext also appear on Comic Chameleon?

        The Android version kept crashing with a memory leak, so I don’t use it anymore. But the iPhone version I hear is fine.

        All I remember is that hovertext worked on xkcd, and I’m glad it did. You press and hold, and it would pop up.

        • ety
          ety
          October 6, 2016 at 4:07 am | #

          Last time I checked I’m pretty sure it was working for DoA…

      • Willoughby Chase
        Willoughby Chase
        October 6, 2016 at 4:46 am | #

        It takes quite a bit of fiddling on my Samsung Android … but at least it doesn’t burst into flames;/

      • Miri
        Miri
        October 6, 2016 at 10:06 am | #

        Thanks – I read a few comics where it’s set as the alt text for the image, but I didn’t know how to access it here.

        Wait, does this mean I need to reread the comic? What aboit Shortpacked? Here’s Walky?!

        • Amazi-Stool
          Amazi-Stool
          October 6, 2016 at 6:16 pm | #

          Wait, does this mean I need to reread the comic?
          Yes!

          Well, actually starting from here, but Damn-You-Willis retroactively added hovertext to one of the previous comics!

          What aboit Shortpacked?
          Starting the same day when DoA first had it (or at least about the same day).

          Here’s Walky?!
          No.

          Bonus answer for question that wasn’t asked:
          Girls with Slingshots?
          Yes for the chaser / re-run.

    • Joe Archer
      Joe Archer
      October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

      Does talking to Sarah qualify?

  9. Stephen R. Bierce
    Stephen R. Bierce
    October 6, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    *plays Dire Straights’ “The Bug” on the hacked outdoor P.A. speakers*

    • Stephen R. Bierce
      Stephen R. Bierce
      October 6, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

      It’s spelled ‘Straits’ you fool!

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        October 6, 2016 at 4:10 am | #

        Dire Straights, eh? Sounds like there’s some sort of situation that desperately requires the attention and/or application of some heterosexual folks to maintain order.

        • DonDueed
          DonDueed
          October 6, 2016 at 5:42 am | #

          No no no. Dire Straights are like Dire Wolves, except straighter. And less extinct.

          • davidbreslin101
            davidbreslin101
            October 6, 2016 at 7:38 am | #

            “The fossil evidence is clear. These unfortunate hominids were physically incapable of any form of non-heterosexual, non-vanilla sexual activity.”
            “Not even…?”
            “No. See those face-flanges?”

          • Slartibeast Button, BIA
            Slartibeast Button, BIA
            October 6, 2016 at 7:58 am | #

            Willis needs to add Dire Wraiths to DoA. And ROM – Spaceknight.

  10. hueloovoo
    hueloovoo
    October 6, 2016 at 12:04 am | #

    Is Joyce about to suplex Mike? Because that would be awesome. ^_^

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 1:03 am | #

      Looks like it could be a German Suplex. too.

      • Disloyal Subject
        Disloyal Subject
        October 6, 2016 at 1:50 am | #

        What we need is a way to see that hovertext on mobile.

        • Orion Fury
          Orion Fury
          October 6, 2016 at 10:23 am | #

          Don’t know that, unfortunately.

          • Amazi-Stool
            Amazi-Stool
            October 6, 2016 at 6:23 pm | #

            Fun fact: No Name’s old (but incorrect) substitute works on mobile.
            The correct way to do it in HTML does not. Yay for mobile browsers!

    • Idontcarenomore
      Idontcarenomore
      October 6, 2016 at 1:59 am | #

      Mike seldom gets physical. He’d rather trap you in your web of screw ups and then make your life miserable.

  11. Sporky
    Sporky
    October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

    You know, I don’t know why, but I somehow get the feeling Walky is actually the best person to talk to Sarah out of this group.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:11 am | #

      uhoh

  12. Tenchan
    Tenchan
    October 6, 2016 at 12:05 am | #

    This is obviously a foreshadow to Walky’s turn to the dark side!

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:59 am | #

      I was going to make a joke about dark side and death, but it seemed a bit too much.

  13. Ravian
    Ravian
    October 6, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

    I always heard that it was free housing if your roommate died.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:58 am | #

      So it’s not free cereal?

      • DSL
        DSL
        October 6, 2016 at 1:11 am | #

        Only if your roommate left any behind.

      • Amazi-Stool
        Amazi-Stool
        October 6, 2016 at 6:27 pm | #

        Roommate died of unspecified reason –
        you already may be a cereal killer!

  14. Bagge
    Bagge
    October 6, 2016 at 12:06 am | #

    Walky and Sarah are making friends!!!!

    Well, for a given value of “making” and “friends”.

    I don’t think Joyce knows that Dina and Sarah have struck up a friendship while she wasn’t looking.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      October 6, 2016 at 12:12 am | #

      I think this is the start of a beautiful momentary-acknowledgement-when-we-pass-by-each-other.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

      Or perhaps that pesky ‘object permanence’ hasn’t fully sunk in yet?

  15. Fart Captor
    Fart Captor
    October 6, 2016 at 12:07 am | #

    I don’t know how Walky got his hands on my feelings about Mike, but I like what he’s doing with them

    • butts
      butts
      October 6, 2016 at 12:12 am | #

      Keep in mind, he’s Mike’s roommate. His on-panel interactions with him have got to be just the tip of the iceberg.

      Pretty sure Walky is just about full up on Mike’s bullshit.

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        October 6, 2016 at 12:21 am | #

        Wonder what their roommate agreements looks like.

        1) No face punching!
        2) Hands off my mom!
        3) No face punching!
        …

        • Lipke the Articulate
          Lipke the Articulate
          October 6, 2016 at 12:48 am | #

          4) Absolutely no mention of nickels!

    • crow
      crow
      October 6, 2016 at 4:24 am | #

      i like how walky has just thought of doing the most relatable thing all comic: kill roommate to get good grades

  16. Griffin
    Griffin
    October 6, 2016 at 12:08 am | #

    did Joyce just restrain Mike

    Will she ever stop aggressively stealing my heart

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:14 am | #

      I’ma gonna go with ‘no’. I do wonder what kind of hat she’ll wear for the next one…

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      October 6, 2016 at 4:21 am | #

      You’ll find that Mike would refer to it as an ‘attempted pick-up line’.

  17. Bagge
    Bagge
    October 6, 2016 at 12:10 am | #

    Easy peasy, Walky. Just strike up a conversation about Joyce’s neuroses and/or eating habits and it will last you to class.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:57 am | #

      Peas?

    • Idontcarenomore
      Idontcarenomore
      October 6, 2016 at 2:01 am | #

      Joyce is shedding her neuroses a bit at a time. As to her eating habits…

      Sarah wont go for that, she based her attempt to make friends with Jacob on those tactics and ended up feeling really bad about it.

    • Cerberus
      Cerberus
      October 6, 2016 at 11:45 am | #

      But… she said she didn’t want to do that anymore:

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/joycestories/

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        October 6, 2016 at 1:34 pm | #

        [Repeating Sarah’s comment in the last panel]

  18. Tacos
    Tacos
    October 6, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

    I’m not sure if not having a roommate will automatically get you A’s Walky.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:15 am | #

      White Hat Hacker who’s taken pity on you?

  19. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    October 6, 2016 at 12:13 am | #

    The coincidental fact that I brought this up 3 days ago blows my mind.

  20. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    October 6, 2016 at 12:14 am | #

    Yay! Walky has graduated to the future-prediction levels of a DoA comments-section speculator!

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

      Well, that and Willis does get his fan base.

  21. Mandy
    Mandy
    October 6, 2016 at 12:17 am | #

    Coincidentally, do we know what Mike is majoring in? I feel like that would be a fascinating thing to find out.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      October 6, 2016 at 12:24 am | #

      Social work, according to Willis’ tumblr.

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        October 6, 2016 at 12:32 am | #

        On the supply side? Screwing up peoples’ lives so social workers can try and fix them?

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          October 6, 2016 at 12:42 am | #

          Only mentioned a major, not a career plan. This IS Mike though, so would you really be surprised?

        • BenRG
          BenRG
          October 6, 2016 at 4:23 am | #

          Some would argue that his aggressive desire to expose people’s personality flaws in unpleasant ways that always makes the person’s life worse fits in with the popular stereotype of a social worker.

      • Bluewind
        Bluewind
        October 6, 2016 at 12:50 am | #

        Huh. I thought it would have something to do with law because of this strip.
        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/interrogation/

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          October 6, 2016 at 1:06 am | #

          A social work major may be required, or otherwise benefit from, a law class,

          • Disloyal Subject
            Disloyal Subject
            October 6, 2016 at 1:57 am | #

            And people can brush up on law without taking the relevant classes. Mike seems like the sort of guy who’d make sure to learn the law so he was never liable for tormenting his peers.

            • BBCC
              BBCC
              October 6, 2016 at 10:06 am | #

              I can see that. Some of those charges come up a lot in the news and such as well, so its hardly impossible not to know.

          • Bluewind
            Bluewind
            October 6, 2016 at 2:10 am | #

            True. He might be intending to go into the Criminal Justice and Corrections field of social services too.

            • BBCC
              BBCC
              October 6, 2016 at 10:08 am | #

              Social workers are everywhere, so no matter where he wanted to work, he might want to brush up on various areas of the law.

              Frankly, Mike as a social worker is maybe the most horrifying(ly awesome?) idea I have ever heard. What admissions person allowed that?!? I think they need to be spoken to.

              Wait, this is Mike. Right, let me amend ‘spoken to’ to ‘fought’.

        • Willoughby Chase
          Willoughby Chase
          October 6, 2016 at 5:10 am | #

          Surprising amount of criminal law contingencies in social work. So a major in one and a minor in the other?

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            October 6, 2016 at 10:09 am | #

            TBH, most majors could probably benefit from studying at least one part of the law, but criminal, health, and family law would probably be most pertinent to a social worker.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:25 am | #

      I think photography.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        October 6, 2016 at 12:46 am | #

        Of course, this is what I search the tag archive for. Looked like art got upgraded for family weekend, Mike doesn’t know about Amazi-Girl (at least based on how I read the dialog, and this lovely gem.

  22. Orion Fury
    Orion Fury
    October 6, 2016 at 12:21 am | #

    Should I be evil?

    • Disloyal Subject
      Disloyal Subject
      October 6, 2016 at 2:11 am | #

      What kind of question is that?
      Be the fly in their soup, be the pebble in their shoe
      Be the pea beneath all beds and the bump on every head
      Be a dagger in the back, an extra turn upon the rack
      Share the quivering of the heart – a stabbing pain, a sudden start
      ‘Cause it’s so pleasing being evil!
      This is the life we lead – the Devil tips his hat to me!
      So do it all because you’re evil
      And do it all for free – their tears sre all the pay you’ll ever need.

      • Yet Another Laura H.
        Yet Another Laura H.
        October 6, 2016 at 11:55 am | #

        I would be very happy indeed to see Joyce discover Voltaire.

        • Disloyal Subject
          Disloyal Subject
          October 6, 2016 at 10:14 pm | #

          She might have a thing or two to say about Death Death Death Death Devil Devil Evil Evil Songs.

      • Romanticide
        Romanticide
        October 7, 2016 at 12:16 am | #

        Voltaire <3

  23. Shiro
    Shiro
    October 6, 2016 at 12:22 am | #

    Wow, Walky, gallows humor

  24. Jess
    Jess
    October 6, 2016 at 12:26 am | #

    Hmm… Now as well as shipping Joyce and Joe, I find myself shipping Joyce and Mike…
    I am conflicted.

    • Dana
      Dana
      October 6, 2016 at 12:48 am | #

      I’ve been shipping Joyce and Mike for ages. Welcome to the dark side.

      • Badgermole
        Badgermole
        October 6, 2016 at 1:34 am | #

        Me too. So wrong but it feels so right.

        • Disloyal Subject
          Disloyal Subject
          October 6, 2016 at 1:55 am | #

          He brings out my favorite side of her. The punchy side.

      • Jess
        Jess
        October 7, 2016 at 1:11 am | #

        I may have to draw a little thing. Just for giggles.
        If I do, I’ll share.
        because all the ships need art for them. XP

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      October 6, 2016 at 1:27 pm | #

      Joyce/Mike doesn’t have a kitschy ship name the way JoJo does.

      (Seriously, those strips in the It’s Walky! rerun happened at the exact time necessary to remind me that Joe/Joyce was the friggin’ bomb)

  25. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    October 6, 2016 at 12:29 am | #

    So what do these two have in common…they both have a sister complex? Wait no he would have that more in common with Joyce not Sarah.

  26. kater
    kater
    October 6, 2016 at 12:34 am | #

    I’d actually be interested to see how the self described “bongoy Killjoy Misanthrope” relates to the self described (and… others described?) Asshole.

    • kater
      kater
      October 6, 2016 at 12:34 am | #

      haha forgot about autocorrect

      • newllend(henryvolt)
        newllend(henryvolt)
        October 6, 2016 at 12:42 am | #

        No the title of “asshole” goes to Mike, Walky on the other hand gets the title of “Smartass shit”

        • Disloyal Subject
          Disloyal Subject
          October 6, 2016 at 1:54 am | #

          They were referring to Mike. Wally’s never been a self-described asshole that I can recall at the moment.

  27. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    October 6, 2016 at 12:37 am | #

    Walky’s got it all figured out, doesn’t he?  The bat, the fingerprints, dying too young, and the automatic ‘A’ for the semester.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:48 am | #

      If only he’d but that much work into studying, he’d have like, what, a ‘C’?

      • Willoughby Chase
        Willoughby Chase
        October 6, 2016 at 5:05 am | #

        At least that’s not a F.

  28. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    October 6, 2016 at 12:39 am | #

    Last panel : Joyce vigorously french kissing Mike off panel so he can’t talk.

    • Teddae
      Teddae
      October 6, 2016 at 12:49 am | #

      I support this headcanon.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        October 6, 2016 at 12:56 am | #

        Undecided, perhaps a debate is still required between Mike and a Nickel.

    • Willoughby Chase
      Willoughby Chase
      October 6, 2016 at 5:06 am | #

      Or the Glasgae Kiss?

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 8:15 am | #

      Well, kissing people for the wrong reason is a DoA tradition…

  29. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    October 6, 2016 at 12:52 am | #

    Don’t be silly, Walky.

    They’ll give you automatic As because your mom goes way back with the Dean.

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      October 6, 2016 at 12:56 am | #

      Connections make the world go round?

    • trlkly
      trlkly
      October 6, 2016 at 4:53 am | #

      You kid, but I actually wonder if that my become a plot point with his bad grades in math.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      October 6, 2016 at 10:05 am | #

      I……I can see Mama Walkerton swinging that tbh. Or at least attempting to.

      No matter how they react to this, it will be badly.

  30. Raibean
    Raibean
    October 6, 2016 at 12:56 am | #

    Joyce, stop cockblocking my new OTP.

  31. Tenzhi
    Tenzhi
    October 6, 2016 at 1:04 am | #

    Huh… “Grade Expectations”… that’s actually a thing on Snopes…

  32. Jason
    Jason
    October 6, 2016 at 1:06 am | #

    I was confused by this strip. At first Walky looks really pleased with his plan, but then in Panel 5 it looks like he starts frowning at the thought of getting straight A’s. Which made me think he doesn’t WANT straight A’s for some secret reason (which really puzzled me, considering his grade anxiety). So in Panel 6 he volunteers to talk to Sarah — so that Mike WON’T, thus preserving his life. But the lack of comments echoing my interpretation made me realize I got it wrong.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      October 6, 2016 at 1:09 am | #

      I think the frown is due to mentioning grades at all – it’s rapidly become an anxious subject for him. He’s been jittery whenever he mentions it.

      • Jason
        Jason
        October 6, 2016 at 1:18 am | #

        Thanks, that makes sense.

      • Cerberus
        Cerberus
        October 6, 2016 at 11:48 am | #

        Yeah, that’s my interpretation as well. Plus, a lot of his pride is wrapped up in his ability to get automatic A’s just for being “smart” rather than needing any trickery, so the reminder that he’d probably need some sort of madcap plan like studying to succeed in Calculus likely depresses him.

    • Willoughby Chase
      Willoughby Chase
      October 6, 2016 at 4:58 am | #

      It’s a nervous tic brought on by failing his maths tests, compounded by a repugnance to seeking help, and a seeming lack of application in studying.

      He was a great student when he was at high school, but what plays in high school doesn’t play so well in Uni.

      It’s possibly compounded by the fact that his sister has done well by seeking help in the form of coaching, and being the boyfriend of a straight A’s student who wants to be president who studies all the hours of the day and night.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 8:19 am | #

      Because of subconscious twin telepathy, he knows the real answer is to sleep with Jason, and is in denial about that.

      • Jason
        Jason
        October 6, 2016 at 11:01 pm | #

        NOW it makes sense!

  33. BBCC
    BBCC
    October 6, 2016 at 1:10 am | #

    Huh. First time commenting, get a Sal grav. Seems this site knows me well.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 8:20 am | #

      There is a secret database link to your permanent record.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        October 6, 2016 at 10:04 am | #

        Normally I’d ask if I should go delete a couple head canons I have but considering A) The fandom, B) The strip’s content, and C) The existence of slipshines by Willis, I think I’ll be okay.

  34. Neeks
    Neeks
    October 6, 2016 at 1:16 am | #

    I think his haunted look is more because he apparently NEEDS a loophole to get straight A’s. Or he thinks he does, anyway. He could always seek outside help but lol

    • Neeks
      Neeks
      October 6, 2016 at 1:16 am | #

      Eff, this was intended as a reply to Jason.

    • Jason
      Jason
      October 6, 2016 at 1:19 am | #

      Thanks, makes sense!

  35. S'toon
    S'toon
    October 6, 2016 at 1:39 am | #

    Is it just me, or does Joyce walk funny in frame 1?

    • DonDueed
      DonDueed
      October 6, 2016 at 5:54 am | #

      She’s hopping over a crack so she doesn’t break her mother’s back.

      Except, after that last weekend she may be hopping ON the crack.

  36. Badgermole
    Badgermole
    October 6, 2016 at 1:42 am | #

    No Joyce, Mike is into excessive use of force!

    • Idontcarenomore
      Idontcarenomore
      October 6, 2016 at 2:05 am | #

      Not that I know of, Mike usually used his warped mind to torment people. Not his fists.

      • ewx
        ewx
        October 6, 2016 at 2:55 am | #

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/interrogation/

        …which leaves me wondering what he’s going to say to Joyce.

        • ety
          ety
          October 6, 2016 at 4:19 am | #

          Wait wait wait… can that be interpreted as AG admitting she’s turned on… (I mean obviously a shipper could interpret it however they want, but that’s different)

          • Aurora
            Aurora
            October 6, 2016 at 6:40 am | #

            I’m pretty sure that’s the author intended interpretation. Plus it’s a bit of a nod to their Walkyverse relationship.

  37. BenRG
    BenRG
    October 6, 2016 at 2:04 am | #

    The cutest thing in this strip? Joyce wrestling with Mike just off the edge of panel 6. Sometimes, Willis draws scenes that seriously reminds you that these characters, despite their adult dilemmas, are still very young and this is one of those times.

    Meanwhile, I wonder if Sarah will feel bound to determine why Walky wants to use her baseball bat on Mike? I mean, murdering Mike at least seems a reasonable step for anyone forced to be his room-mate but there has to be a reason and maybe she’s far enough away from his circle that he’ll feel able to talk with her. I hope so because his attempt to deal with his academic performance issues on his own is really impacting on the quality of his life.

  38. Idontcarenomore
    Idontcarenomore
    October 6, 2016 at 2:10 am | #

    Pretty good grab there Joyce, surely caught Mike by surprise :).

    Walky turns out being a surprising person to talk to people and help them, as with A.G. on the roof top. So maybe …. he will at least take Sarah’s mind off her decision to try to be social or not to be.

    Mike and Joyce ….? Very interesting ship. I’d like to see that happen I think.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      October 6, 2016 at 3:14 am | #

      Walky is pretty good at small talk (when his smartassery meter isn’t set at ‘buffon’ and he resorts to monkey-flinging), and he and Sarah has had a great bonding experience as kinda sane people in a mad world before. I am cautiously optimistic about their interaction
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/truce/

    • Cerberus
      Cerberus
      October 6, 2016 at 11:50 am | #

      I dunno. Mike and Joyce clearly have the best chemistry out of Mike and anyone else in the cast and Joyce can sometimes get Mike to show a less shitty face to the world, but I’m still hesitant to ship Mike with anyone until he becomes less of an unrepentant abuser.

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        October 6, 2016 at 11:56 am | #

        The thing is that, if Mike wasn’t just trying to press Amazi-Girl’s buttons, it is quite possible that he may interpret Joyce trying to grapple him as a clear come-on!

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        October 6, 2016 at 9:48 pm | #

        Mike/Ryan.

        …..

        …. okay, I don’t know whether this makes me feel vindictively satisfied or just cringey.

        • quix
          quix
          October 6, 2016 at 10:34 pm | #

          I’ve actually been wondering if Mike might end up doing something horrible like Ryan did.

          Mike has no apparent sense of boundaries or consideration of other peoples consent to his actions. Wouldn’t that be the twist if Willis sent him down that path, in a “No, it’s not ok even in the people we’re used to and accept as part of our group.”

  39. John
    John
    October 6, 2016 at 3:08 am | #

    That’s the saddest I’ve ever seen anyone look at the thought of Mike dying and getting straight ‘A’s.

    • trlkly
      trlkly
      October 6, 2016 at 5:20 am | #

      Yeah. It actually seems that getting As he wouldn’t deserve makes him sad.

      Though I’m sure someone else has a more complicated explanation that will make me feel silly.

  40. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    October 6, 2016 at 3:13 am | #

    Walky is surprisingly devious. When Dorothy becomes The President she could make him the boss of CIA XD

  41. Keulan
    Keulan
    October 6, 2016 at 4:07 am | #

    I think Mike and Sarah should definitely talk. He’s an asshole, she’s a misanthrope, they’d get along fine.

    • OnyxIdol
      OnyxIdol
      October 6, 2016 at 6:53 am | #

      I don’t think so. Sarah has a heart, whereas Mike… not that I can see. And Mike would totallay call her out on that.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 8:23 am | #

      They fight crime!

  42. Kitsune
    Kitsune
    October 6, 2016 at 9:29 am | #

    I remember that urban legend, never thought to use it. But I only had a roomate for the first year, then I got a psycho single for being ADD

  43. Songbird
    Songbird
    October 6, 2016 at 10:46 am | #

    Joyce looks like she’s suplexing Mike in that last panel. Awesome.

  44. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    October 6, 2016 at 2:02 pm | #

    Nice

  45. Mr.Morningstar
    Mr.Morningstar
    October 6, 2016 at 2:51 pm | #

    and then walky planned to kill mike

  46. Roborat
    Roborat
    October 6, 2016 at 3:22 pm | #

    And the ironic part is that Mike really likes Sarah and was looking for an excuse to talk to her, but was too shy. Why, yes, I do read far to many high school romance mangas. how could you tell?

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      October 6, 2016 at 3:46 pm | #

      So Mike is is either Tsundere or Yandere?

  47. lenny
    lenny
    October 6, 2016 at 4:04 pm | #

    this IS the lead in to a 5 book long baseball arc

  48. athan1214
    athan1214
    October 6, 2016 at 5:25 pm | #

    Can we please just have mike get suplexed by Joyce in the background? Don’t even acknowledge it, just show it happening.

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