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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 16h
The Emotion Engine @emotion-engine.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
The Emotion Engine @emotion-engine.bsky.social ⋅ 13d
Vangelus @vangelus.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
FactPost @factpostnews.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Frances “Poet Laureate of the Robot Alliance” Klein @fklein907.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Aaron Fritschner @fritschner.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Josh Johnson @joshjohnsoncomedy.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
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| TEAM FOSSILS
Rainbow Friends
Dr. Frizzle
Dillie’s facedown in a b
wait
Soon Billie will suffocate. At least she’ll die happy.
We all would, K. We all would.
Quick, Ruth, wake her up ‘fore she suffocates!
But that’s like…one of my top 10 ways to die! Isn’t it everyone’s?
My number 12, just below mortal combat with the eternal warrior spirit of Bruce Lee.
I’ve never thought of “death by Bruce Lee spirit,” that’s good. Hell, you must have some pretty good ones on your list already, because I think that one is good enough to be #2 on mine, right after my favorite: killed by a falling satellite. (Because it’s simultaenously ” clearly it was fate” and “gee, thanks a lot, guy who invented the satellite.”)
My top 2 is a tie between ‘drunken fight with a bear’ and ‘enuff dakka.’
You know that there isn’t such a thing as “enuff dakka”, don’t you.
Exactly.
Seriously, based upon 11 and 12, I wanna hear 1-10.
My number one is hungry butterflies. It’d be painful and monotonous, but it would also be historical.
I’m gonna have to go with my dad’s favorite way to die: spontaneous combustion in the middle of a board meeting. Just, like, “…clearly shows how last quarter’s sales numbers are *fwoosh* AAAIIIIEEEEE I SMELLL DELICIOUS”
Death by falling satellite sounds pretty sweet actually, ‘cos I’d never see that coming until it was waaaaay too late. In fact, anything that’s extremely final and too sudden to avoid.
Death by falling satellite
Enuff dakka
A sudden explosion
Supervolcano
Meteor impact
Being in the instant-death zone of a nuke
Gamma ray burst
What I think when you say death by satellite:
http://satwcomic.com/eurovision-2010
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=IRgp-7Q4alU#t=40
No one else has the scene from Dr. Strangelove where Major Kong rides a nuke dropped from a plane while waving a cowboy hat on their list of favorite ways to die? I think riding a nuke would have to be my way to go.
Autoerotic asphyxiation isn’t on anyone’s list??
also, pretty much any Machine of Death card
I think my top way to die would be to die fighting off something deadly so my loved ones could escape, and lasting just long enough to realize I succeeded.
If I can do that at a ripe old age it will be perfect.
What *I* Tthink when you say “death by satellite”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMlq5IJ265M (I hope I’m not the only old geezer here who’s old and geez enough to remember that)
I think my preference would have to be Death Buy Lemonade.
@Arkadi I know Northern Exposure was a show that was running during my lifetime, but that is about all I know about it.
Death by falling “satellite” (actually the toilet seat from the Mir) is the opening scene in “Dead Like Me”.
Well, Aurthur C Clark invented the idea of the geosynchronous communication satellite. Herman Potočnik had some ideas about satellites in 1928… Hard to say who had the very first conception of it, really.
Can’t we just go with once you’re dead you’re dead and so the moments leading up to it are by comparison inconsequential? I’m going to go with that one.
I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather.
Not like the passenger in his car.
Ok, but only if by “moments leading up to it,” you mean one’s entire life; that way it’s nice and fatalistic.
Satellite means anything that orbits anything. The moon is a satellite. The earth is a solar satellite.
My favorite deaths are mostly strange… but one of them is riding on top of a car that is going in one direction really quickly, and jumping off of it onto another car that is going just as fast in the opposite direction. Dying from the change in momentum, but before impacting the ground. It would be pretty hardcore.
Also, killed by bunnies.
I think this is my #1 way of dying.
Getting killed by a satellite? How about getting killed by toilet seat from space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugWpj88EWt4
And I should have scrolled down another page befor I posted.
Remember, Dead Like Me was just a TV show, if you get killed by a satellite, you don’t get to be a Reaper.
I want to die by spontaneous combustion, or rather, what I pictured spontaneous combustion to look like when I was ten or so. Casually going about your day, when, for no reason at all, you explode. No warning, and no time to feel pain, and also everyone around you is all WTF?
Well obviously you gotta be slain in combat, so you get to go to Valhalla or Fólkvangr after
Hmm, does it count as death in battle if the satellite falls on me if I’m bravely combatting security guards as they throw me out of an Olive Garden?
eh, fireworks are ore fun.
Dumb ways to die…so many dumb ways to die
Yea, but she will fear no evil, for boobs art with her.
The power of boobs compels her. One does not simply escape the gravitic pull of those boobs. In fact, Ruth’s boobs and Billie’s have probably settled into a common orbit and become their own binary (quaternary?) system. Billie’s really up Boob Creek.
or she vomits… and then suffocates…
Jen FTW.
Right on top of things
Billie’s not snoring, that’s just how she imitates a motorboat.
Sleepmotorboating!
So Fishboating?
@fishingboatproceeds ?
You get all the hugs for that one.
What can I say, I am a huge fan of CrashCourse, especially History 1&2 and Big History. (little out of the target demographic for his books…)
SO MUCH WIN
Damint, Willis beat me ta the valley joke.
Well, take a look at their lives, and realize they have nothing left.
Lo’ though I snuggle alone in the Valley of Death, I do not fear reprimand, for they are soft and warm.
“I could bury myself in them and be safe forever…”
More like facedown in a bongo, amiright?
(Yes, I know I’ll get lashback for that, but I can’t fight the pun).
Jen Aside hath enninjaated thee.
Yes you are. You are so right ^^
uarrite.
marshmallow
Best ditch I’ve seen.
My daughter flips Ds and Bs backwards too.
JenAside beat you to it.
Poor Billie has been trapped in an amusing motor-boating accident.
She seems to be trapped in a crevice. Quick, someone throw her a rope.
Pssssst, Dorothy. Ask Walky if there’s anything between him and Billy now before it becomes a big blown up thing, k?
Walky actually has a big Blow up doll of Billie.
Dorothy was there for the, “She’s like a sister,” “I’d rather do his sister,” exchange.
They should really all hang out/ abduct Dina more.
I concur.
…come to think of it, how hard did Dorothy need to study to catch up after that little outing? Ugh.
I think Dorothy looks so concerned there because being scared and concerned over someone is not very Walky-ish. If Walky is worried about her, that means she really could be in danger (as far as they know).
If this was the other way around we would never see Ruth again. She’d be lost in the abyss.
An abyss of joy.
I just transparently draw fanart involving boobs cuz I’m ALL about drawin’ cartoon boobs.
gud
Nice one, I’m all about the bass.
You really need to draw a webcomic.
I REALLY want to. But I’ve got such a terrible work ethic. I’m like the anti-Willis!
That is the most safest most comfortable ditch you can find.
I bet Billie’s are more comfortable, but somehow I don’t think she’ll be facedown in her own
I don’t think she’d be very comfortable if she were. Heck of a crick in the neck.
I bet the Amazi-Rack is pretty comfy.
Billie/Amber. Two girls with glasses with severe mental issues. What could go wrong?
In between the 3 of them not shore who would have the better set..who am I kidding A/A hands down.
Are we going back to the pile?
That is awesome.
More ditches need to be this!
I was going to do something clever with “gangsta’s paradise” but then I remembered I suck at rapping
Good thing Billie and Ruth’s positions aren’t reversed, or Ruth may never have been heard from again.
Sorry joke taken.
I beat ya to it, Dean.
Ninja’d! YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS, GADGET!
Next time Gadget!
*cat meows/growls angrily*
I don’t think I’ve read a comic that makes me change my mind about a character as much as this one, every time I start to feel bad for Joyce or think maybe shes not so bad she pulls out something like this (massive jealousy leading to wanting to break Walky and Dorothy up) to remind why I dislike her so much
Mind you something else will come up later to make me feel bad for her again…
I don’t read Joyce as trying to break up Walky and Dorothy here. Quite the opposite in fact. She’s worried about her friend Billie, knows that Billie spent the night in Walky’s bed the other night, and is worried that her friend might take it the wrong way when Walky is obviously just trying to comfort her friend. She didn’t want to tell Dorothy in the first place after all, but also didn’t want to lie to her friend. If anything, I think she came along to try to assist Walky with any damage control.
The fact that she has an overactive imagination and a suppressed sex drive means that she fears that Billie and Walky were doing more than just sleeping together. Her entire experience with couples boils down to her parents (whom we know little about), and her
…Crap, posted by accident when I meant to move the mouse…
Anyway, her entire relationship experience is her parents, and her limited experience with romantic comedies, which is why she ships Billie and Walky since they grew up together. She doesn’t really know how else they could interact with each other.
Since this storyline seems to be headed in the direction of everyone learning about Ruth and Billie’s ‘relationship’ I suspect that Joyce is gonna piss you off again first.
Abandon all hope ye who enter here.
If I ever find I like gettin’ pegged in the butt, I’ll have to get a tramp stamp that says that.
Or we could go directly to buttsex.
**tips hat** Well played sir.
I Humbly suggest including a Treasure map to your Prostate, for the aforementioned ‘Hopeless’ …. for reasons
Er, whoops. This was supposed to be a reply to Mr Random. Must have clicked something wrong. Yikes, I’m no where near his comment.
… well, enjoy entirely out of context mythological reference.
Billie’s fine. And she’s in the Ruthless Moutains Walky, big difference.
Sounding kinda like a parent there, Walky.
Somewhere between a over Bering mother and over protective older brother
But what does a Russian explorer have to do with parenting styles?
Just what I was wondering!
Well, at least the Bering is Strait.
Y’know, she should probably move, she’s probably having trouble breathing like that. That said… What a way to go
I wouldn’t care if that was me, not everyone has the luxury to always be able to sleep in between a beautiful pare of tits every night.
Unless you’re married to them
Nope, just in a dycke
I am so sorry
…and then it turns out I spelt it wrong and didn’t mean what I thought it did. Disappointment.
Well, the word “dike” originally meant “ditch” (as opposed to “levee”), so actually it’s a pretty good play on words . . .
No, no, I got it…
http://www.moviesounds.com/vietnam/dikes.wav
Had some where I lived in BC. *Grin* But this is more relevant.
Stare too long into the abyss, and you’ll find the abyss staring back at you xD
I really like that Billie is wearing an “unsexy” but clearly supportive bra. While I don’t doubt that Billie has sexy bras, I appreciate the understanding that bras built for holding large boobs up tend to be more function over form.
I’m kind of confused as to why Billie’s even wearing a bra at this point. All the ladies I’ve slept with have made a point of losing them ASAP, even if we weren’t sleeping together like that. And given that Billie and Ruth are sleeping together like that, it seems rather surplus to requirements.
I usually take mine off at night but I’m an F and after a couple of kids, in Billie’s position I would definitely keep it on. Perhaps Billie just thinks the twins need that extra support in “public,” too…
Doylist: It’s easier for Willis to draw strips if he doesn’t have to keep arranging panels and figures to keep things family-friendly (while writing about self-destructive one-night stands).
Watsonian: Billie never took it off.
Watsonian Doylist: It’s easier for Willis if Billie never took it off?
At least until the slipshine comes around.
Yeah, if you’re going to nitpick about Billie not taking off her bra, what about Ruth not even taking off her top? Remember, this is what they were wearing when Ruth
woke upregained consciousness after having passed out from all the booze.Yeah, from that I gathered they never got that far into it before tiredness and alcohol put them to sleep.
Haha, I like all bras. I find bras sexier than bare boobs usually. Even the “ugly” supportive ones. I’m wondering if Willis does too.
Despite the self destruction, depression, and general sadness. It is in a simpler moment like this that makes me think that Billie and Ruth can actually work out their problems.
Once Walky and the others find Billie I am really hoping there will not be yet another misunderstanding or misinterpretation.
I wander what they smell like ?
Skin, cotton, and sweat. Probably some tones of dirt, booze, and lotion, too.
Booze. They smell like booze.
…How long has she been Motorboating Ruth?
By the looks of it, for at least 16 hours
Bad news: Billie’s been in an accident.
Good news: The airbags deployed.
it’s comments like these that make me really want a link button or something
whoops **like
In China, when they sleep like that, they say you are resting in Gentle Country. (Doesn’t translate very well, but I love the expression.)
Wish I could rest in Gentle Country. (I’ll remember that expression, thanks.)
Backs shape heaven’s arches,
Long hair braids with fingers
as the tea grows cold.
(John M. Ford, from the short story, “Green is the Color”)
That’s lovely (and evocative). Thank you!
Billie is just out for a testdrive in her new motorboat…
Don’t now if I’m reading too much into it, but…
The quickness that Walky worries, and the quickness that he leaps to the worst-case scenario with Billie…
Given how little Walky caries/pays attention to anything, this says to me that “Billie winding up face down in a ditch” is something that he’s thought about/worried about before. He’s been stressing about Billie coming to a bad end for awhile, even though he’s probably never consciously realized it.
Or I’m reading too much into a few panels.
It’s entirely possible, to not say likely, that Walky witnessed the whole DUI thing and its aftermath (at least from a distance), so he’ll have a more direct sense than anybody other than Billie herself (and, as an observer, likely a better sense) of how bad things can get.
Plus it’s been too long. Wonder if he’s afraid it’s booze related and she did something to herself or if someone could’ve taken advantage of her.
Well, the standard reaction to someone not having slept in their room would be to assume they spent the night with someone else… But if you’re talking about someone who’s clearly in a major emotional tailspin, it’s only natural to worry about uglier possibilities.
Panel 3: Walky fears Billie is in a remake of “Sunset Boulevard”.
Oddly enough, I guess in this version Walky will be Norma Desmond.
freckles everywhere!
That last panel is so hot.
Billie shall fear no evil, for she is the baddest motherfucker in the valley.
But where’s her big shovel?
Joyce’s little jags to get Dorothy jealous over Walky and Billie together appears to have backfired.
Pretty obvious here that Walky really is worried about her (we here on the other side knew that already).
Then after goading Joyce to actually go check, Joyce out Mike’s Mike and get into the room, where, I’m guessing she hoped to catch some action going on.
Too bad Joyce: Dorothy see’s Walky now as really concerned for his friend. Later she may ever consider the way YOU pushed your agenda.
Q: What lies in a ditch and goes “ding dong”?
A: A wounded Avon Lady.
Love that last panel. Hope for them maybe.
See, Walky? THAT’S how you do a smashcut.
Hurray! The ship is not only out to sea, but she’s now being powered by a turbine. In other words, a motorboat.
Gosh Billie, quit being a total boob.
Still such kind of sleeping and waking up is much better than somehow having your partner’s feet in your face.
Well, Walky IS right, technically.
more like face between two mountains
More like face down in a valley.
more like… uh… (insert clever breast euphemism here)
She got buried in a boobquake.
pillow talk
Face down in the shadow of the valley of breasts is the best place to be
Ha. I remember calling it the valley of the shadow of death in my Christian high school and thinking I was SUPER ORIGINAL.
Ahh, that’s how I want to go. Hungover, facedown in an equally hungover redhead’s chest.
Reliving momma’s boobs, Billie?
As a mom who breastfeeds, you just made me shudder.
Boob suffocation is the best type of suffocation.
Oh, holy shit, that’s actually adorable. I wasn’t expecting anything adorable out of Billie and Ruth of all couples
I think Joyce Walkie and Dorothy need a healthy dose of boundaries. I understand about worrying about someone and that they dont know what we know (she’s physically safe). This group is pretty emeshed and trying to help one another but I think they’d be better off with worrying less and allowing one another to be responsible for themselves.
And between the “it ain’t my concern” mindset and the “surely someone else has got this covered” excuse, this is how people with problems — whatever they are — fall through the cracks. Remember the proverb which Hillary lifted for the title of her book — “It takes a village…..”
Because when you know someone is drinking heavily, someone whose just been told they were poison and agrees with the statement, someone whose entire life has been pulled out from under them recently, someone who admits only two people actually care about her, and that person disappears, of course the thing to do is ignore the problem. That can in no way backfire.
Even if she wasn’t depressed and told she was poison and hardly had any friends… if you’re one of those few friends and haven’t seen her since noon the day before — A young hot female who likes to drink and have random flings who hasn’t been seen or heard from for almost 24 hours — and you’re not worried, and don’t want to check up on her and/or find her…?
Maybe it’s because of this missing-and-probably-dead college girl in Va, whose friends let her wander out alone and drunk, I just think people need to be better friends and watch out for each other like this group. So… I applaud Walky’s worries, even though they’re leaning more ‘omg suicide/accidental overdose’ than ‘kidnap/murdered college girl.’
Cue the slipshine release. Please…
Got the first part right
Ruth’s tolerance for cute is about 5 seconds.
Nothing better than a facefull of boobs.